Spiders and Spanners

Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers in any way

Summary: Ratchet deals with a case of arachnophobia

Author Note: Just something I thought of when I was killing a big spider in my room, admittedly with a notebook and bug spray instead of a wrench. This is the re-post which has been beta-read by CaMaRoFaN14. I do use Australian English instead of American English due to the fact I am Australian so words such as favourite, colour and mum are all spelt with 'u''s .

Beta: wazzup people? Who knew Ratchet hated spiders? Well I don't blame him at all… little buggers.

A yellow Autobot stood surveying the pristine medical bay with a stern eye, looking to make sure it was in perfect order. He couldn't have it anything but meticulously clean if he had to be the one to keep the Autobots functioning. As his gaze continued across the room he spotted something extremely small creeping between his medical tools. Narrowing his optics he stalked towards the offending creature.

The small creature, unbeknownst to the Autobot medic, was a small, red back spider. Specifically it was Annie, one of the twins many pet one really knew why Skids and Mudflap had such a large assortment of poisonous creatures but many assumed it had something to do with driving Leo, their charge, insane.

Ratchet continued to stride towards the spider, ready to remove it from his medical bay to return it to its former perfect appearance. As he came upon the workbench Annie decided to move from the wrench she was hiding beneath to the spanner opposite it. It was this darting movement that caught the medic's eye and his optics fell upon the spider. It was then that the medic let out a high pitched humanoid scream as he leapt away from the bench.

His vents cycling air rapidly, Ratchet clung to the berth he had landed against for support. His eyes warily fixed on the tool bench opposite him to ensure Annie could not creep up on him.

The Autobot knew, oh how he knew, that this fear was irrational. It couldn't hurt him, its poison wasn't even poison for him, it was a thousandth of his size and it was made of organic substance but these rationalities did nothing to ally his fears.

Being in a room, this close to his worst fear was... terrifying. More terrifying than losing a patient, more terrifying than facing Megatron alone, more terrifying even, than the thought of Sunstreaker and Sideswipe coming to earth.

But Ratchet knew, knew with his spark that he had to get the spider out of his medic bay. To return his domain to its once pristine greatness that was now marred by the small, out of place arachnid.

Gathering his courage the Autobot medic let go of the table and pulled a wrench out of subspace brandishing it as one would a sword, up high and ready for battle.

If one would walk into the room at this moment they would immediately take a battle stance and scan for a Decepticon before finding there was none and assuming the medic had lost his processor. However no one entered the medical bay and Ratchet was left to charge into battle against the poisonous creature.

Slowly, stealthily he ambushed the unsuspecting arachnid. Creeping towards his work bench with surprising ease, he was ready to terminate the problem once and for all.

Reaching the hiding place of Annie he used the wrench to nudge the spanner hiding her out of the way so he could get a clear hit at her. As she was revealed he brought the wrench down on her-hard! The arachnid was crushed, her small entrails smeared across the clean work place.

Ratchet studied the entrails with wary optics until he was 100% certain that the spider could not continue its escapade around his medical bay. As he moved to clean up the entrails he cycled air normally for the first time in the last ten earth minutes.

It took only one Earth minute for the med bay to be in perfect condition, ready to take any injuries that may occur. The relieved Autobot surveyed his domain with pride, for the cleanliness he could keep it and his prowess in removing offending arachnids.