Ria sat at her desk with her head in her hands. No matter what anyone said she knew that those two men getting killed was her fault. If she had done a more thorough job she would have known about the occasional painters. Ria poured herself a glass of vodka from Lightman's stash of liquor and downed it with two gulps. Everything was a mess in her life right now. Her relationship with Loker was strained and strange. She was having a difficult time connecting with her younger sister even though both of them were trying their best. But her fight with Loker tonight was what sent her over the edge.

Flashback….

"What do you want from me Ria! I care about you but you keep shutting me out! What am I missing here? Is it something that I am doing wrong?" asked Eli in an exasperated tone."You haven't let me sleep over in nearly two weeks. You won't even let me kiss you."

"You didn't do anything I just don't have time for a relationship and neither do you for that matter!" fired back Ria with her hands on her hips. She couldn't believe they were having a screaming match in an alley behind their favorite bar and yet here they were. She wanted him to drip this conversation. She wanted him to let it go but he was like a dog with a bone.

"You haven't let me touch you in weeks! You can't tell me that it isn't about me. When I go to touch you…you get this sick look on your face. What did I do to you?" asked Eli seriously. "I am trying to make this relationship work but you keep shutting me out. I don't know what you want from me. Maybe you don't want anything from me but I am tired of playing this game with you…I can't do it anymore Ria…we're through." said Eli.

"You didn't do anything to me Eli…you didn't do it…but…someone else did." said Ria in a strained voice. "Please…don't say that…I just…I just need some time." said Ria pleadingly.

Eli turned away from her. He couldn't bring himself to look at her. Her facial expressions, her micro expressions, her eyes, they all screamed with pain and emotions that he couldn't deal with at the moment. He walked away from her leaving her there in the alley. He stopped and said "I'll take you home…let's go." He still didn't look back at her.

"I don't need your pity!" screamed Ria. She stormed out of the alley pushing by him. She refused to let him see her crying. She took a cab back to the office.

The longer she sat and brooded about her problems the more she drank. The office was silent because everyone else had gone home. She found herself stretched out on Lightman's couch finishing off his bottle of vodka. She cried as she drank. She had found herself crying a lot lately. More than she ever had in her life.

Cal Lightman had just gotten into a knock out argument with his ex-wife about their daughter's future. He walked into his office and spotted Ria all but passed out on his couch. He stood at the door his head tilted in her direction for a moment taking in the scene before him. Ria was stretched out on his couch. One arm was dangling off the couch close to the empty bottle of vodka. Her head was turned toward the inside of the couch and soft snoring sounds were coming from her. Lightman flipped on the lights and shouted "Oi! What do we have here?" asked Lightman looking peeved but in reality he was slightly amused by the situation.

Ria was startled out of her drunken stupor and tried to scramble to her feet but instead in her uncoordinated state she only ended up rolling onto Lightman's floor with a thud. She looked up from the floor her long dark hair covering her face and a slightly crooked drunken smile floating across her lips. "I...I...needed a drink...and Loker told me where you stash the good stuff in your office..." muttered Ria shifting positions so that she was sitting on the floor as opposed to being splattered on it.

"Did you have to drink the whole bottle love?" asked Lightman walking over picking up the empty bottle. He tossed it into the trash can so that Ria didn't break it in her drunken state. He had a seat next to her on the floor. "You want to tell me why you are getting drunk on the couch in my office?" asked Lightman looking at her. This was the second time he had come across her drunk like this. The first time it had been at his house and she was waiting for him. Although she couldn't have possibly been waiting for him this time. So why was she in his office? She could have took the bottle and had a drink anywhere.

"I messed up Lightman...I really messed up. And it is just an example of how my entire life is going down the toilet. I can't seem to get anything right in my personal life. My job was the one area where everything was going great." said Ria staring at Lightman. She groaned a little because her vision was blurry at the moment. She saw two or three grainy versions of Lightman's face in her head at the moment. She closed her eyes to concentrate on what she was trying to say. "A security guard...former police officer had to kill two men because I made a mistake on the job. I was careless and it caused a lot of people a lot of pain not to mention it could have given a bad name to the entire Lightman group. "My sister...she...wants to come live with me but, I don't really know how to take care of her. She needs a lot of love, supervision, guidance...things I can't give her with my schedule. But if I am not working this job...I wouldn't be able to take care of her anyway. And Loker! Loker is my worst mistake of all. I had sex with him...a lot of sex with him! Good sex too...really good sex. I mean he really knows how to."

Lightman laughed at her drunken confessions but he stopped her from giving detail about her sexual escapade with Loker. "Ria...stop. You are going to regret going on like this when you finally sober up. And I will be sure to remind you of this conversation." Though this wasn't news to him. He already knew that Ria and Eli had slept together.

She laughed and said "Oh that is right you don't want to hear about hot sex. Anyway, now we are weird around one another. I don't know what he wants from me and I don't know what I want from him. And...I want someone else I think but he could never want me the way I want him. And I keep reaching out to him...and he just doesn't see it...he doesn't see me. And Loker….doesn't want to see me anymore because…I can't give him what he wants. But I…I just needed a little more time. I needed more time."

"You are reaching out for Loker?" asked Lightman confused for a moment. He was hoping that she wasn't saying what he thought she was saying. He looked at the young woman's face and saw the pain she was feeling. She was far too drunk to try to hide her micro expressions from him. Her face was like an open book to her soul at the moment.

"Why...? Why don't you want me?" asked Ria looking at him. "I'm beautiful right...smart...funny...sexy...manipulative...you like those sorts of things in women...and at first I thought you didn't want me because you were in love with Foster...but you have sex with women over and over again...so that can't be it. And it can't be because of not wanting to sleep with employees because while I've worked with you I've watched you break dozens of lows and social constructs." She groaned and slid closer to him. "Don't you see anything you like?"

Cal said "Love, are you going to make a habit of coming onto me when you are piss drunk? Because if you are maybe you shouldn't drink as much. You aren't interested in me...it is the liquor talking. Come on I am going to get you home for the night." Cal stood up and gently lifted her up so she was supported against him.

Ria felt her heartbreak a little hearing Lightman's response but she refused to let it show. She didn't say anything as he guided her out of the building and out to his car. Ria didn't say anything else to him after that. She felt like a scolded child and her brain was too fuzzy to come up with a catchy comeback.

Cal helped Ria out to the car and got her into the backseat. He made sure that she was settled before climbing into the drivers' seat and starting up his car. He started driving toward her place. The silence in the car was deafening. He knew that he had hurt her feelings but it was the best way to keep her from throwing herself at him and embarrassing herself yet again. She was a talented young woman but she was obviously a damaged one and he wasn't going to take advantage of her even if he did find her attractive. Cal arrived at her place and helped her out of the car and up to her door. "Where are your keys Torres?" asked Cal.

Ria said "Uh...in my desk...at work." Ria burst into laughter realizing she had no way of getting into her house at the moment. She just kept laughing to herself.

Cal looked at her door and considered picking the lock but decided better of it. "I am going to take you home with me you can stay in the guest room." said Cal. He walked with her back to his car and helped her in again. He got into the car and drove to his house. He was glad that Emily was with her mother for the night. He helped Ria into the house and into the guest room. "You can sleep here for the night. I'll get you something to sleep in...just stay right here." said Cal leaving her on the bed.

Ria laid across the bed for the moment trying to regain her senses. She wanted to be more lucid but she couldn't manage it at the moment. She stood up and started stripping out of her clothes.

He walked to his bedroom and searched his dresser for a long t-shirt and a pair of shorts. He walked back into the room and spotted Ria in only her bra and panties. Lightman's eyes couldn't help but wonder over her beautiful body. He shook his head and walked over handing her the shirt and shorts. "Here...I'll see you in the morning. I am down the hall if you need anything." Cal walked out of the room trying to ignore the feeling he got from seeing her nearly naked. He closed the door behind him and then went to his own bedroom and changed for bed. He changed into a pair of navy blue and white striped pajama bottoms. He climbed into his bed tiredly and tried to get the image of Torres out of his head.

Meanwhile Ria pulled on the t-shirt he had given her and she fell into the bed tiredly. It didn't take very much for Ria to drift off into a fitful sleep but she was used to that.

Cal fell asleep after a couple of hours but woke up hearing a shrill cry from the room down the hall. Cal shot out of the bed like a bolt of lightning. The scream had sent shivers up and down his spine. He raced down the hall to the guest room and flung open the door. "Ria?" asked Cal his voice thick with concern for the young woman. It was then he realized that Ria was still sound asleep in the bed but was tossing and turning and crying in her sleep. He walked over to the bed. "Ria! Ria you need to wake up." said Cal.

Ria was startled out of his sleep and moved away from Cal her eyes wild with fear. She scrambled to the other side of the queen side bed clutch a sheet around her body. It took a moment for the fog of her nightmare to lift. She looked at Lightman with tears in her eyes. "I'm sorry..." whispered Ria hardly able to find her voice. She didn't know what else to say as silent tears slipped down her cheeks. Her breathing was still rapid and her eyes darted around the moonlit bedroom.

Cal walked over to the bed and turned on the lamp. "Ria?" asked Cal in a soothing voice.

Ria didn't respond she just sat there with the sheet clutched to her for a few minutes. She couldn't bring herself to look in Lightman's direction. In a shaky voice she said "Sometimes...no matter how far you run...those same demons are at your heels...I can't get away from them...no matter what I do...no matter how far I go. Please...don't leave me alone...please."

Cal looked at the tears in her eyes and couldn't bring himself to leave her. "I won't...why don't you lay down and try to get some rest. I know you have to be exhausted right now." said Cal. He moved his legs into the bed and leaned against the headboard.

Ria finally relaxed and scooted across the bed so that she was closer to Cal. She rested her head against his chest needing to feel close to someone at the moment. She closed her eyes tiredly and whispered. "Thank you...Cal." said Ria. She started to drift off to sleep.

Cal found himself lightly caressing her hair. "Just get some rest that is what I important. I am here if you need me." said Cal.

She slept for an hour before she started having another nightmare. She cried out in her sleep. "No…please…please…please don't hurt me. Let me go!" whimpered Ria. Ria settled down after awhile and stopped talking in her sleep.

Cal closed his eyes but he doubted that he would be able to fall asleep. He laid there until he heard Ria's breathing even out. He looked down seeing her asleep but didn't have the heart to leave her just in case he woke up again. Eventually, Cal fell asleep as well. The next morning her woke up seeing Ria still fast asleep, her head resting against his chest. He looked down and saw the sheet had moved and her bare legs were exposed. Cal covered her with the blanket and slid out of the bed quietly so that he didn't disturb her. He walked downstairs to the kitchen and started up a pot of coffee. He walked outside to grab the newspaper and walked back in. He had a seat drinking his coffee and reading the paper. He sat there thinking for a minute and picked up the phone dialing Gillian Foster.

Gillian answered on the first ring. "Good Morning Cal….what can I do for you?" There weren't many good reasons why Cal would be calling her this early in the morning.

"It is good to hear your voice too love….but I do need a favor. I need you to talk to Torres. I think something has happened that…she needs help with. I can't put my finger on exactly what…but I think she was attacked." said Cal.

Gillian was shocked and said "What makes you think that?"

"She…was drunk so I brought her to my house last night. She had two nightmares…one in which she was pleading not to be hurt. She's been acting strange for the last couple of weeks…" said Cal.

"I'll talk to her today…see if I can pick anything up…if she was attacked she might have gone to the hospital for treatment." said Gillian.

"I'll reach out to a friend of mine and see if I can find out anything about any hospital visits." said Cal. "I'll probably be late coming into the office today. I am going to wait around for Torres to get up."

"Alright, I will see you when you get in for work." said Gillian hanging up.

Ria woke up by herself. She was confused about where she was at the moment. She looked around and then got out of the bed. She ambled out of the bedroom and down the stairs and realized almost immediately that she was in Lightman's house. She walked into the kitchen tugging at the hem of the shirt he had given her the previous night. "Lightman…" said Ria in a tentative voice.

"I see you are awake…good." said Cal. He got up and poured a cup of coffee for her and set a bottle of aspirin in front of her. "I am sure that you are going to need this." said Cal looking at her.

Ria was more than embarrassed and she couldn't even remember everything she had done and said the previous night. She tried to hold her head high ad looked Lightman squarely in the eyes. "I am sorry about everything that happened last night. I wasn't really myself..." said Ria. She sat down drinking from the cup of coffee. She opened the bottle of aspirin and popped a couple in her mouth. She took another sip of coffee to wash the pills down.

Cal said "Well, that is an understatement if I ever heard one love. You are definitely not yourself...but that brings me to the question...Why? You haven't been yourself for awhile now and I've noticed it, but I didn't say anything because I figured you would get it under control. But when I come into the office and find you passed out drunk on my couch...we've moved past the point where I can just not ask you what is going on. So do you care to tell me why you were getting in my office no less?"

Ria wasn't ready for the hard questions she didn't know how much of the truth she really wanted to tell Lightman. She knew she was too hung over to even attempt lying to him. She would have to settle for tell him a partial truth. "It all started when Loker and I got into an argument last night. We broke up and…and I didn't really know what to do. So I went to your office and took your vodka…which I will definitely replace. I am so sorry for all of the problems I've caused you."

"But why in my office love?" asked Cal looking at Ria.

"I guess…I felt safe there. I felt like…if I was there nothing would happen to me." said Ria. She stopped talking realizing she had admitted much more than she had intended to.

Cal gave her a worried glance but didn't ask her anymore question. "I am always here for you if you need anything. I am here."