A/N: Hola mi lovelies!

So sorry I haven't updated in a while. But I had an excuse. I was ON HOLIDAY! *awesome guitar solo thingy*

So please enjoy the following chapter.

Disclaimer: I am not Joss Whedon, Bram Stoker, L.J. Smith, or Darren Shan. I do not own Blogger either. I am also not J.K. Rowling either, or Fall Out Boy (they broke up *sniffle*), and I'm DEFINITELY not Meyer.

I'm back!

Posted by: Angel

So my high/perfectly happy mode has gone. So in Spike's words, the broody poof is back! (God, I never thought I would be happy to say that!)

Comments:

Darla: But not too happy. :D

Angel: True.

Drusilla: No! Daddy is gone! Miss Edith disapproves of this.

No sign...

Posted by: Spike

... of Cullen anywhere.

You think he's gone? For good?

He said he'd be back with backup, but I seriously doubt that would happen.

He thought he was awesome too. Poor messed-up bugger.

Comments:

The Master: THIS.

This is totally random, but...

Posted by: Angel

I have a doppelganger. An older, chubbier doppelganger.

... AGENT BOOTH.

Seriously, haven't you seen Bones? He looks like me! He even has the same voice and the same Angelus smile! And he's a detective... well, FBI agent too! And he kicks ass too!

Re: This is totally random, but...

Posted by Spike

My doppelganger beats your doppelganger, peaches.

Comments:

Angel: Oh yeah? Who's your doppelganger?

Spike: John Hart from Torchwood.

Angel: What? He doesn't even look like you. He has normal, non-radioactive hair.

Spike: It's all in the face, moron. And he has my head-tilt.

Angel: But Booth pwns all!

Spike: But you are a poof and your opinion doesn't count!

Darla: ... Torchwood is an anagram of Doctor Who.

Angel: Booth has a gun.

Spike: Hart is British. Pwned.

Bored...

Posted by: Darla

I'm so bored. At least when Cullen was here it was fun bashing him.

... Who wants to go troll with me on the Werewolf blog?

Comments:

Drusilla: MEEEEEEEEE!

Spike: Sure, why not?

Angel: Yes! Let's go!

Meanwhile, on the werewolf blog...

Has anyone here seen or read...

Posted by: Remus Lupin

Twilight. It's an abomination to werewolves and literature. It has purple prose, absolutely no plotline, and is a waste of our time.

Comments:

Greyback: I read it. It was such a FAIL! I mean, first Meyer practically castrates all our legends and mythology, then she decides in Breaking Dawn that they're not werewolves, they're shapeshifters! I mean, really, it's as if we're not good enough for her damned books!

Team vampires!

Posted by: Darla

Vampires are better than werewolves! There is no "Buffy the Werewolf Slayer" or "Werewolf Diaries" or "Werewolf Academy", is there?

Comments:

Nina: Troll.

Remus: Yes, quite true, but there is no vampire professor in Harry Potter, or a "Vamp-Man".

Greyback: Or a sarcastic rocker vampire.

Spike: Actually, that title belongs to me.

Greyback: Oh, right. :P

Angel: VAMPIRES RULE!

Drusilla: We are better, the stars told me.

Back onto the vampire blog...

Oh gosh...

Posted by: Darla

That was soooooo fun! We should troll the fairy blog sometime, or the demigod blog. Or even troll the troll blog. That would be so hilarious!

I'm back!

Posted by: Edward

I'm back! You thought I wouldn't come back, but I did, so ha!

I'd also like to introduce a couple of new vampires. I have known them for a very long time, and think that they are even more vampire than moi here. So give it up for the Cullens!

Now, just in case you haven't read our beloved biography, the Twilight Saga, I'll give you a summary of us real vampires:

Carlisle: The head of the family, and a very wise man. Also, he rocks the blonde hair better than you, Spike.

Esme: Sweet, caring, epitome of a vampire, with all the kindness of a mother. Hahaha, and you died before you could even hold your son, Darla.

Emmett: The best fake brother I could have, and good at catching meals too. Instead of Angel, that lowlife, who steals blood bags from the hospital. *snort* Honestly.

Jasper: Ditto about the great brother bit, and he can control your emotions better than... well, something. Take that, Drusilla!

Alice: The best chess player, other than me, of course. And she can see the future. Take that again, Drusilla!

Rosalie: Well... she's nice. Sometimes... not really. Hey, she's better than... okay, well... I have nothing to say for Rosalie. :P

So face the wrath of the Cullens!

Comments:

Darla: ... Aw, crap.

Spike: What the fuck is this?

Angel: Okay, Cullen, you're going down!

Damon: We're going down, down in an earlier round!

Stefan: And sugar, we're going down swinging!

Damon: I'll be your number one with the bullet!

Emmett: A loaded god complex, cock it and pull it!

Edward: ...?

Emmett: What? It's a good song.

Darla: Hehe, cock.

The Master: Shut it Darla, GemonkDruid told me this fic was rated T!

Darla: Fic?

Angel: Fic? What fic?

The Master: Um... nothing... :L

Alice: OMG haiiiiiii! So I guess you're the enemy. But we can still be friends, riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight? And I think Angel is kind of cute... :)

Spike: Oi, hands off, twig.

Alice: Then again, Spike is also quite hot. :)

Angel: GET AWAY FROM HIM, BITC- I mean, uh, nothing.

Rosalie: Edward Masen Cullen! You edit that post right now! I refuse to be put down by your bitchy attitude.

Darla: ... I think you and I are going to be great friends... :D

Rosalie: Agreed. :D

Carlisle: She has a point, Edward.

Esme: Who wants cookies? Oh, wait, we're all vampires here. Woops. :)

Drusilla: Mommy doesn't want to take it. MISS EDITH TOLD ME NOT TO! :'(

Spike: Don't worry, Dru. We'll fix this.

So... what do we do?

Posted by: Angel

Frankly, I want to end this now, before they even start.

And I very well know they're watching, Spike, so you can shut your mouth. :(

Comments:

Damon: I don't know what to do.

Darla: I don't know what we can do.

Spike: Don't worry, I have a plan.

Angel: What?

Spike: Remember the girl that kidnapped the Master?

The Master: I prefer the term "unwillingly kept in her house".

Spike: WHATEVER! GemonkDruid, right?

Stefan: Yeaaaaaah? Why?

Spike: She likes us, right?

Darla: Yuuuup. :P

Spike: And she hates Twilight, right?

Angel: Where is this going...?

Spike: Aaaaaaaaaaaand she's fucking crazy, right? A bit fearless too, considering that she kidnapped a master vampire.

The Master: UNWILLINGLY KEPT IN HER HOUSE.

Spike: We could send her an invite to this blog...

Damon: But she's not a vampire.

Spike: Neither are the Cullens.

Damon: Eh, true.

Spike: So we invite her, we stand back while she fights the Cullens. Perfect idea!

Darren: This is going to be a very long week...

Yes, I shall be starring in my own fic. Very lame, I know, but my friend said it was a good idea! :C