[A/N: Way, way AU, though still in-game universe. This will probably be one of the last of my Abyss stories, if not the last because the others are way too embarrassing to post.]
"For crimes against the Empire and the Order, this court finds the defendant, Jade Balfour, guilty as charged and subsequently sentenced to death by-"
"Wait a sec. The death penalty, really?"
"Your Majesty, is there a problem-"
"Of course there is a problem." The emperor sat up straight in his seat at the center of the tribunal table for the first time since the day's proceedings had started literally, at the crack of dawn. After two cases of coin fraud, one civil dispute and a tea break, arrived a pale, tired looking youth in chains. Chains that were used to suppress fonists, he noticed. "The problem is, that he's a child."
"Yes, your Majesty, but there are unusual circumstances, if you read the file-"
"Are you implying I didn't read the file?" That shut down the goon sent by the Order of Lorelei pretty quickly. "Because I have. But, there is no trial record. Where is the record of the trial?"
Uncomfortable expressions. Someone volunteered an answer- "There was a military tribunal."
"A military tribunal? Really? And whose military did young Mr. Curtiss here represent? An army of one?"
"Your Majesty, what's important are the charges-"
"Charges brought forth in a private military tribunal- which, as the head of state and commander in chief I am shocked and offended I was not invited to, but furthermore I doubt he was given any sort of representation or really, even a chance to talk. He looks like he hasn't said anything since he was taken into state custody."
"Your majesty, please just sign the sentence."
"Are you attempting to subvert my authority as the Eighth Emperor of Malkuth? Because that is known as treason and I could build a pretty fair case out of that-"
The Cantor paled.
"But it's been a long day for all of us, so, I will put this sentence on hold indefinitely until further notice, meanwhile... Sorry, I'm being presumptuous. Mr. Curtiss, do you have any protest against this action?"
"No." The boy replied, looking neither surprised nor pleased.
"Do you agree to be sworn into the service of the Empire of Malkuth and the Emperor, ie. myself?"
"Yes."
Peony Upala Malkuth VIII signed a hastily scrawled order with a flourish, stamped it, handed it off to his aide and dismissed the shocked and grumbling unit from Daath. Needless to say he'll be hearing from them again, but they'll have to get the Fon Master to even challenge something like this.
"Find someone to prepare lunch, please, in the library. I'd like to have a chat with our new friend," he said brightly, scattering the leftover people. He needed some privacy.
"Now, you've said all of two words since you got here... are you normally this quiet or do you simply have nothing to say? Hint, it's two words that start with 't' and end in-"
"Thank you," Jade replied, clearly without enthusiasm, but at the very least with a hint of gratitude.
"You're very welcome. Shall I fetch someone to take those off for you?" he asked pointing to the heavy looking shackled.
"No, I can take care of it," he said softly, the fonic glyphs engraved into the metal glowing briefly, before crumbling like ash onto the floor.
"That are our newest fon slot suppressing tech you know," the emperor said appreciatively. The files didn't lie, this boy had talent. At first he found the charges a little hard to believe, but the longer he matched that unblinking red gaze, the more he started to believe. But he did not believe Jade should have been executed for it.
"I know. It's probably pretty effective against rogue fonists, but anyone with discipline can break it pretty easily-" he stopped himself short, looking a little surprised he even said that much.
"I take it you have an interest in the fonic artes then. No doubt, with that kind of talent. I hope to put it to good use, rather than have it wasted at the bottom of the bay. I hope you agree."
"I do."
"Then let's shake on it. I saved your life, so I hope you can return that in the future," he said, offering his right hand. The boy had a firm, fearless grip. He liked this kid already.
-
"Blue is a good color for you," the emperor said appreciatively. The drab oversized prison shirt was replaced with a uniform from the military academy, he figured there were enough students to get away with borrowing one.
"If you say so, your majesty." The honorary title was awkward on his tongue.
"I think you can dispense with the title. Just Peony is fine. I have enough people calling for his majesty every day, and I can never shake the feeling they are looking for my father," he laughed easily, motioning for him to sit at the table set for two. "Eat! Food is medicine."
"Ok... Peony." The name was only marginally less awkward, but then again... everything about today was like a dream. After spending two weeks in a lightless, freezing cell in Keterburg and then being ferried in a crate like produce to Grand Chokmah, and then brought before a room of strangers and told he was going to die, before this eccentric monarch intervened... it was shocking, and Jade had honestly thought nothing could do that to him anymore. Peony looked too young to be a monarch, barely into his thirties, but seemed quite used to the power and responsibilities.
"So, tell me about yourself, Jade."
"I'm sure it was all in my file-"
"I mean about you, not what you've done. We can talk about that another time. I mean like, how old are you?"
"Thirteen," he replied, picking up his knife and fork.
"Where were you born?"
"Keterburg."
"What about your parents?"
"Deceased."
"I'm sorry to hear that." Clearly Jade was not keen on volunteering information about himself. "Do you think I did the right thing?"
"The right thing about what?" Although, it was evident that question didn't need to be asked.
"Sparing your life."
Jade gave no reply. It was clear what he thought about Peony's decision.
"Can't sleep?"
The fon lamps were out, only the light from the moon illuminating the darkness. Peony found himself unable to sleep, worried by the way that talk ended at dinner. He had wandered over to Jade's room on a hunch, unsurprised to see the boy staring contemplatively at the window. That look suited him.
"Are you in the habit of stealing cutlery?"
The blade of the knife gleamed in Jade's hand. He was holding it loosely at his side, like an odd accessory.
"What were you going to do with that?"
"I don't know," he said quietly.
"You never answered my question earlier. Did I make the right choice?"
"I don't know." he said again.
"I read what the file said. I assume... you don't deny the charges?"
"No... they are all true."
"They were going to execute you... Do you think you deserve to die?"
"Maybe." A shadow of uncertainty. Up until now, Jade appeared to the world as a serious, mature boy who had so much talent, but now all Peony saw was a boy, scared, uncertain, and completely alone in the world.
"Well, I don't think you do. That's why I postponed your trial and had your file destroyed."
"Why are you doing this for me?" Jade asked suddenly.
"Because... you're special, I suppose. Despite what you've done- those terrible things- you deserve another chance. You can do good for this world. I'm a good judge of these kinds of things," he said, trying his best to sound confident.
Jade smiled weakly at him. The first time he saw the boy smile.
"I hope you're right."
"I'm sure. I'm not an emperor for nothing. Now, you should sleep. You're going to be up early tomorrow. And please, return my steak knife. They will be upset with an incomplete set, since it's an antique."
"Here," Jade said, returning it to him.
Impulsively, he hugged him. Clearly Jade wasn't used to human contact, but he didn't care. This kid needed a hug. Briefly, as he held that fragile thirteen year old boy to his chest, he remembered his own son, halfway across the country, probably around Jade's age. His chest ached.
-
"When did you start learning fonic artes?"
The sun was just peeking over the horizon, and the faint glimmer of the fon belt could still be seen from the hill they were hiking up. He needed a private place to get an idea of Jade's abilities without alarming security. Few people were happy about his decision to take Jade under his protection, but perhaps it might be the other way around one day.
"I was five years old when my abilities began to manifest."
"That's very early," he said, impressed. He was a prodigy, no doubt. "How many types can you control?"
"All of them. Except the seventh," Jade replied softly, bitterness underlying his words.
"Your eyes aren't natural, are they? Some sort of fon operation?"
"Slot enhancers on the retinal fonslots."
"Who would do that to a kid?"
"I did them myself."
That was a chilling thought. Peony had no talent with the fonic artes, like the general populace. It was considered talent to master a fonon, exceptional to control three or four. But all six, at such a young age, combined with the ruthlessness to perform a potentially disabling operation on yourself, all for the sake for power... Some would say that made him a-"
"A monster. That's what you're thinking, right?" Jade said, casting a neutral glance at him.
"Er, I wouldn't use that word, exactly but-"
"But most people do, when they find this out. That's what they said, when they came to get me. 'You are a monster and you will be put down'," he said, with maybe a touch of pride in his voice.
"Is fomicry such a horrific thing?"
"More than you can imagine."
"Well, I'm not the expert. You are. So, tell me about it. Fomicry. If you don't mind."
They took a break at the top of the hill, staring at the great walls of the city in the distance.
"It's the process by which one can replicate objects by obtaining the fonic frequency and then generating it... It's fairly simple."
"How simple?"
"I can do it right now," Jade said calmly, picking up a branch. Carefully, he drew a glyph in the dirt with the tip. "Do you have anything unique, that you are very familiar with?"
Peony thought briefly about what they brought with them. Then he slipped the traditional blue stone out of his hair, handing it to Jade. "It's a-"
There was a crackle of electricity and the warping of fonons as it broke into several pieces in Jade's palm.
"-priceless heirloom..."
Wordlessly, he placed the pieces inside the glyph and there was a brief flash and a wave of heat- the air crackled with raw power just barely reigned in by those slim, pale hands. Peony peered over Jade's shoulder and found himself staring at the original in several pieces on the ground, and its twin, in his original pristine state. He picked it up, holding it up to the light.
"So this is just like the original?
"It's exactly the same." Jade said pedantically. "For all intents and purposes it is the original, because they have matching fonic frequencies."
"Interesting... Although, it still isn't the same. There are the pieces of the old one."
"I can dispose of it for you-"
Peony grabbed his wrist before he could disintegrate them or something. "Why don't you keep it, as a reminder?" he said, gathering up the remains.
"Reminder for what?"
"For what's to come."
"How are things at the lab?" Peony asked as they walked down to the gardens together. A month had already passed since Jade started to work at the newly created Fomicry research facility near the palace and the adjoining military base.
"Fine. The trials have really come along in a short time."
"Thanks to you single handedly pioneering the project, am I right?"
"I suppose." Jade said, brow furrowing. That day he stood before that burning house and the blood on the snow, he was certain he would never try fomicry again. Yet, because of these circumstances, he will inevitably do so. However, he couldn't bring himself to resent Peony because after all, it was his own choice. And only he could do this. Every day, the small bag containing the pieces of that blue stone hung around his neck reminded him of this fact. "So, what are we doing out here?"
"I figured, you've been cooped up in that lab for a while, it's time to get some physical activity in your schedule. Do you spar?"
Jade looked a little apprehensive. "I can defend myself, if that's what you're asking."
"Well, let's see then."
"Isn't this going to attract a lot of attention?"
"Only if you let yourself get distracted. Hurry up, you probably don't want to ruin your jacket," Peony said, casually hanging the blasted fiddly bits of his wardrobe on a bush before adopting a defensive stance. "No fonic artes, just you. Try to land a hit."
Jade circled slowly, his stance wary and light, suited for someone with a smaller frame. Clearly he had experience in combat, but maybe not with other people. His stance mimicked some of the monsters Peony encountered in the north, with the same cold, calculating look. And when he struck, Jade was almost quicker than he was. Almost.
"Almost had me there, you're very quick," he commented, extended a hand to help Jade up, who had been knocked flat on his back. Predictably he ignored his help, brushing the dirt of his pants.
"So are you."
"Well, my life is very valuable to me. Try again."
This time Jade didn't wait, springing forward- too obvious, to Peony, who dodged the feint and countered, aiming for the solar plexus. But his opponent knew better, parrying and very nearly landing a kick to his shin, before being thrown off balance by an effective blow to the shoulder.
"You have an unusual style of fighting. Who taught you?"
"No one," Jade said, looking just a little agitated. Clearly he wasn't used to coming out on the bottom of conflicts. Peony had to admit it was a little unfair, but perhaps necessary.
"Judging from your movements... you have experience hunting? Creatures in the north with a lower center of gravity and considerable more weight?"
"Something like that-" Jade didn't waste any words, already coming at him again. He actually managed to push the emperor back a couple times, but inexperience fighting people and the disadvantage of having a shorter range meant that round ended with new bruises.
"You'll be an excellent fighter when you're older, you'll just have to make up for it for now."
"Why exactly are you personally seeing to my combat training? Don't you have people for this-" Jade started, taking a cautious break to try and find an opening.
"Because my life is very valuable to me," Peony reiterated with a grin, blocking the first kick that came towards his face, already moving to intercept the blow he anticipated to his torso, but never came. Instead, Jade aimed another kick high, to the shoulder that left an opening when Peony shifted his stance to block. The emperor realized this a split second too late, but was met with another surprise as Jade's strike stopped a hair's breadth from making contact.
"Good one. Why did you stop?"
"Isn't that against the law? To strike a monarch?"
Peony doubled over in laughter. It just seemed so... out of character, to worry about something like that, especially after pretty much getting his ass kicked...
"What's so funny?"
"N-nothing, Jade, you are technically correct, but for the sake of the exercise I think we can suspend that rule-hrk"
"Ok." Jade said, after sucker punching him in the gut. For a pretty light kid, he knew how to put his weight into it, Peony thought appreciatively while trying to get air back in his lungs. "Congratulations," he gasped, finally standing back up. "I think we're done for today." They picked up their things, heading back to the palace.
"So, are you big on hunting game?"
"Something like that," Jade answered vaguely. He was used to hunting, but not for sport. Research. He recalled how much his sister hated that particular hobby of his. "I'm going back to the lab now... Thanks."
Peony ruffled his hair affectionately. "Don't work too hard."
"How old are you, Peony?" Jade asked one afternoon, over tea.
"Almost thirty two. Why?"
"Well, your birthday is coming up in a week isn't it? Coincidentally, a national holiday."
"Right. I almost forgot," Peony said easily, being truthful. Lately he had been so busy it hardly occurred to him it was almost his birthday, again. "I suppose once you get to that age, you tend to want to dwell less on your birthday. When's yours?"
"The eleventh day of the eleventh month," Jade replied.
"You'll be turning... 14?"
Jade nodded. Apparently he didn't like to think about it much either.
A week later, was Peony's birthday and Jade's formal introduction to Grand Chokmah's aristocracy. The event was held in the grandest hall of the palace and Jade spent most of his effort trying to subtly avoid having to talk while Peony was actively introducing him to literally every guest. He did meet an interesting individual though, when he sought asylum on one of the empty terraces.
"Not good with crowds?" A tall, regal looking woman inquired politely from the shadows.
"It's all politics. I'm really not interested."
Her laugh was gentle, as was her gaze. "That's a refreshing change. Politics is everything here. What's your name?"
"Jade Balfour."
"I don't recall a House of Balfour registered in the ancestral records..."
"I don't belong to a House."
"Really." Her interest was piqued. "Where do you live?"
"Here."
"My, my. Are you close to his majesty?"
Jade paused, considering that question. "Not really. I'm the director of the lab next door."
"You're awfully young to be directing anything- of course, I don't mean any offense. Clearly, you're special."
He shrugged, trying to find an excuse to leave, except he had made it apparent he wanted nothing to do with the party. And this woman made him uneasy, in a way he couldn't exactly explain.
"You're such a beautiful child," she said dreamily, "He would be your age-"
"Jade, who is your new friend-" That familiar, rambunctious tone cut through the tension, but the emperor's voice faded when he came face to face with pair. "Ah. I knew you two would get on famously, two anti social butterflies in a corner. Jade, this is my wife, properly known as Empress Carlotta, but she's just my Lottie," he said with a grin, before getting tweaked on the nose.
"I told you not to call me that in public!" she said, without any real annoyance. "I think I will retire. Don't wear this poor boy out, Peony." she said, sweeping past the both of them.
"That was the first time you met her, right?"
Jade nodded silently. Naturally, Peony would have a wife, as the monarch of the empire. It was puzzling that it had been this long before he actually met her though. "She doesn't live in the palace, does she?"
"You are correct. She spends most of the year convalescing in the southern territories, where its better for her health."
"I see... What's wrong with her?" Jade asked bluntly.
Peony leaned against the marble railing of the terrace. "We were betrothed when we were still very young- things weren't as bad with Kimlasca as they are now. We were wed when we were 17 and our first son was born a year later. Shortly thereafter, war broke out...Well, I'm sure you know how that went. Let me ask you a simple question: How many children do I have?"
"There's only a single heir to the Malkuthian Empire, and the crown prince's whereabouts are currently classified for fear of assassination by Kimlasca," Jade answered promptly. This was all basic history.
"I was afraid you'd say that. Follow me." They left the palace, striding through the sea of people easily, slipping into the gardens. Jade was already familiar with the layout, so he was unsure what Peony had to show him that was new.
Peony stopped at the main courtyard, ringed by eight white dogwood trees, in full blossom in the summer night.
"Lottie had these planted here because we couldn't have any marked graves for the seven children she lost."
"There are eight trees."
"I know. I can't figure out whether the last tree is for me, or for our surviving son."
The emperor sighed, the sorrow evident in his gaze, usually so full of energy and enthusiasm. Those broad shoulders that were always set back in defiance to all stooped ever so slightly.
"I'm sorry for dragging you here..."
"It's fine," Jade said, taking a seat beside Peony.
"I just wanted to explain... how this changed her. She used to be full of so much life... but as you can imagine, to suffer such a loss as a mother..."
"You are a father, too."
"I know, but my responsibilities extend to the entire empire. I can't help but fear she hates me... deep down. You would hate someone too, for indirectly resulting in the murder of your children?"
"I wouldn't know how I would feel."
"I hope you never do," he said gravely, listening as the wind rustles the branches of those beautiful, slender trees. "So, the empress stays at the villa in Chesedonia for most of the year, except when it would be odd for her to be absent at a social event. Like my birthday," he said, the bitterness in his tone betraying him. "I'm sure if she had the choice, she would never come back to this city ever again or see my face for the rest of her life."
Suddenly, the garden was a considerably more depressing place to Jade. He understood the emperor a little more, but still had no way to comfort him. It just wasn't in his nature.
"I shouldn't have put this all on you. You're just a child, after all."
"Do you really consider me a child?"
Peony laughed, a little too harshly. "No, I suppose not. You're more of an adult than most adults I know. But that can be a bad thing too," he said quietly. "Don't be in a hurry to grow up."
"I'll keep that in mind," he said, before turning to walk back to the palace, leaving the emperor to mourn by the trees.
When Peony returned to his room several hours later, he was about to collapse on the bed with exhaustion, but noticed something was left on the windowsill that wasn't there before. It was a fonglobe, masterfully crafted with a miniature model of the Imperial city inside. The water fonons contained in the globe glowed comfortingly. Etched in the flattened bottom were the words, "Happy birthday -J" Peony smiled, setting it on the nightstand. Despite the miserable evening, he slept well.
11:45. He had fifteen minutes to log the benchmark results and then restart the testing cycle. Everyone else had left the lab, leaving him to work with a few lights on and a silence few would appreciate. Fifteen minutes later, the machines whirred to life, signaling the restart of the 17 hour cycling. Mechanizing fomicry with algorithms and theoretical fonology was not an easy or quick task. Maybe a short nap was in order-
"It's my favorite under age workaholic, Jade!"
Barging through the lab like he owned the place (Well, technically he did) was Peony, carrying several bags in with him.
"It's my favorite geriatric unorthodox monarch, Peony," Jade replied dryly. "It's midnight you know."
"It's your birthday, you know."
In the twelve months they've known each other, from the day they met in that imposing throne room, to today, in the lab, they've gotten used to each other, in a strange territory beyond subject and ruler, that an almost twenty year age difference couldn't quite explain.
"I know."
"I brought a cake."
"I hate cake."
"I know." Peony said with a grin, setting it out anyway as Jade scowled, rescuing papers and important documents from crumbs and icing. Haphazardly, he stuck fourteen candles into the white frosted surface. "Shoot, I forgot matches," he said, patting his pockets absently.
"Not a problem," Jade said, lighting the candles simultaneously without even lifting his hand.
"Handy. Now, make a wish! Blow them out!"
"What is the point of this exercise?"
"There isn't a point. Just do it!" Peony insisted, smiling happily as he shut off all the lights. The candles cast a cheery glow in contrast to the cold fluorescence lights. Jade sighed, as if he were the adult put upon by a child, closed his eyes and blew out the candles, plunging the room into darkness again.
"What did you wish for?"
Conveniently, Peony couldn't see him flush in the darkness. He could never reveal what came to mind in the split second before he blew out those fourteen flickering spots of light.
"World peace." he answered sarcastically, leaving to turn the lights back on again. Once again they had to hide small changes in expression and unsaid gestures in the unforgiving light.
"Ever the humanitarian." Peony said, smiling as he cut two slices of cake. "Oh, I almost forgot. This is for you," he said, taking a flat, wrapped package out of the other bag he was carrying.
"You shouldn't have," Jade remarked, unwrapping the dense tome on fon particle theory. "It's a first edition too," Jade actually sounded touched for once.
"I knew you would like it. Happy birthday, Jade."
"Thank you."
"I hope you like it here. Sometimes I worry I'm robbing you of your youth."
"Hardly. I can't really imagine doing anything else."
"Well, you could go to school. You are wearing the uniform for the military academy."
Jade made a face. "Not really my thing."
"Are you sure? It might be a good thing to spend time with your peers." Peony said, brow furrowing in worry. He knew Jade was not a child, but he wasn't an adult either. He was not his son, but he wasn't unrelated to him anymore. It was a long shot, but he wanted him to feel comfortable around people, not just him.
"I have you," Jade said simply, "But... if it means that much to you, I'll go. To see if I like it," he said grudgingly.
"Great," Peony said, smiling. "Let's see... who owes me a favor..." Peony was filling in the mostly completed enrollment form. Clearly, he had planned this all along. "I think the Curtiss' still owe me one for the arms dealing... 'Jade Curtiss', that has a nice ring to it."
"I need a new name too?"
"Few people know who you really are. Luckily you managed to avoid meeting anyone who would remember your name, so an adoption wouldn't be too out there. Does it bother you?"
"Not really. Balfour doesn't mean anything to me," Jade said, signing the bottom of the enrollment form with his new signature.
"Think of it as your new life, officially starting now," he said.
"I don't have to live in the dormitory, do I?" Jade said with clear distaste.
Peony laughed. Maybe he was a little afraid Jade did want to leave, so it relieved him to hear that. "No, you are free to stay here. You always are."
The last time Jade was in school, it was in a simple, one room class room with the most important person in his life at the front. This time, it was a expansive, affluent campus with several grades of students, identified by the detail of their uniforms, milling about, chatting in small groups. Jade declined being put in the upper levels, because he quote "Didn't want to make anyone feel too bad about themselves," and agreed to observe quietly in the grade associated with his age. It was really a terrible exercise, but if it brought the emperor some peace of mind, he would suffer through it.
After reporting to the administrative office, he was ushered to his classroom, although he was perfectly capable of finding it himself. Then he was forced to introduce himself, as Jade Curtiss, walk by the stares, some interested and some vacant, then take a seat in the back.
The rest of the day was a blur.
"How was your first day?" Peony said, bounding over in excitement. Jade just slid into his chair, closing his eyes.
"Exhausting."
"You are only fourteen! Where is the exhuberance of youth?" Peony asked, pouring tea.
"Must have left it back home, do you have a spare?" he replied dryly. It honestly wasn't that bad, besides the prying questions that were expected of the new student who was declared the new individual of mystery- after all, he was adopted, he clearly wasn't a national, and he seemed only mildly interested in the work.
"No one's tried to bully you, right?"
"Do you really think that would become a problem?"
"It might, for them."
Two years came and went in the blink of an eye. It seemed just yesterday Peony met a solemn thirteen year old and now he was expected to believe the sixteen year old directing the lab was the same person. Jade had let his cropped hair grow long, almost brushing his shoulders. He also started wearing glasses, claiming it helped with his headaches. Peony just told him to read less. And after he started going to school regularly, things seemed halfway normal. Their sparring matches were more even every day, Peony even suspected Jade was forcing himself to hold back. Though, looking at the bruises they scored on each other after practice said otherwise.
"How's weapon training at school?" Peony asked while they took a break, sitting down gingerly.
"Easy," Jade said, refastening his hair at the nape of his neck. "I learned something handy though," he said, demonstrating how he could rematerialize an an object by reconfiguring fonons to restore it to its original form- like a spear.
"That's quite a big weapon."
"Well, once you break down the particles, it takes surprisingly little space." Jade explained, watching as the particles appeared to dissolve into thin air, when in reality they were resting on the surface of his skin, thinner than the air itself.
"Well, keep it like that, or palace security will be upset," Peony said, impressed as always, with Jade's genius. He was truly remarkable. Still, he would probably always worry about him.
And Jade knew it. There were definitely points when Peony felt downright manipulated, but he went along with it. It was harmless. Of course, by the time, it was too late. All he had offered was water and then Jade was kissing him, calculating but determined, like the first time they ever sparred.
How did it come to this?
To Jade, it came as a logical conclusion mixed with the inevitable rush of hormones and growing up that gained momentum in the two years he spent in the palace. It wasn't something he was proud of, but not something he could deny. For all the semi-paternal attention Peony ended up lavishing on him- perhaps for lack of his own son, Jade never considered him a father figure. After all, he didn't even know what that was supposed to be. And with this act of defiance and desperation, he drew a very bold line. Predictably, he didn't expect Peony to cross it.
The emperor pulled away the second the shock passed, looking suitably scandalized for once. Serves him right, Jade thought, just a little bitterly.
"Jade. What was that-"
"You know what it was." he said, aloof and cold. The adrenaline was fading and the aching was settling again into his bones. It was a familiar pain, from going day to day to watch Peony from afar, or from up close, and never have his feelings acknowledged.
"You can't-"
"Why?"
"Because I'm-"
"The Emperor? Another man? An adult?"
"Well... Yes," Peony said, sighing in defeat. "Besides that, you are-"
"Not a child. I hope you never considered me one, because I can't do it. I can't be your son," Not when I feel this way, he finished silently.
Peony kept his gaze steady on Jade, even if it pained him to do so. He felt that if he even blinked, Jade would disappear. "Jade. When you arrived here, you were young, but you were by no means a child. I didn't mean to give you the impression I wanted you to be a substitute for my son. Because I don't."
"Then-"
"But that doesn't mean this ever happened. Do I make myself clear?"
"Of course," Jade replied softly, leaving before any more could be said. It all went like he expected, but it didn't make it hurt any less. He had been so sure- yet at the same time, he couldn't resent Peony for it. He did what was expected of him, he was the one acting irrationally, pursuing a venture that was dead in the water.
He could only hope to be forgiven.
Peony watched him leave, take the familiar, private path back up to the palace. Only once he was out of sight, did he relax, realizing his hands were trembling. He should have seen the signs, the gazes that lingered and the protectiveness that did not necessarily come from patriotism. In his stupidity, he never considered distancing himself, creating things like boundaries and rules because he was just as swept up in the whirlwind of that beautiful, blossoming person he saved-
Sweet Lorelei, he was damned.
-
Work. Research. Testing. Endless repeated cycles of testing. That was what Jade could do. The loop kept him from thinking of anything outside of it. Two weeks flew by without realizing he hadn't left the lab. If his assistant didn't leave food out of concern and pity, he might have collapsed. But he pushed through the exhaustion. Here was the only thing he could do well, and maybe in the end, someone will say he did well.
Although, whether it was the right thing to do was a completely different case.
He was being uncharacteristically cowardly. He should be going about his normal schedule, as to not cause any worry. Yet, he decided to hide here, in his research and his lab, where he couldn't be touched. Because he already reached out once, only to be pushed back out. Well, then he'll push that person out of his mind too.
Sitting down might be a really good idea at this point, he thought, vision blurring dangerously. Sitting down on the floor would be really convenient, all he would have to do is let his legs give and-
"You idiot."
Someone caught him, right before his knees hit the floor, hoisting him up like a rag doll.
"Are you trying to work yourself to death?"
"I live for my work," he said faintly, trying to wave him off while grasping for the edge of the table to support himself. He didn't need Peony to hold him up anymore. He'd done enough of that in the last three years.
"Well, I'm not going to let you die for it."
Jade scoffed. "Hardly. We're just in stage three of development and it's going to require a lot of..." he forgot what he was going to say. Rather, he just focused on the pleasant feeling of leaning against someone. Peony always smelled like a mix of clean clothes and ink and the air of the city.
"I'm sorry if I was harsh-"
"I'm not some delicate mountain flower. I understand."
"Then I hope you can forgive me."
"I forgive you," he murmured, dozing off.
"Thanks," Peony said with a smile, half carrying half dragging him to one of the sofas in the back. He was getting heavy. He remember telling him not to grow up so fast, but in the end, Jade had seen more than some adults by the time he arrived here. Absently brushing the strands of light brown hair from the sleeping boy's face, he left, switching off the light.
Those were peaceful months, in comparison to that chilly, wintry day a messenger arrived with the news the late Empress perished in an assassination attempt. There was no body.
The entire palace was silent. Peony was apparently refusing any company, but he had left the door unlocked. The grieving emperor sat at the edge of his bed, his face in his hands.
"Peony?"
"This isn't a good time-"
"I heard what happened."
"Like I said-"
"You couldn't have done anything."
"Please. I can't believe that right now. What use am I to this empire, if I can't even protect one person-"
"It's not your fault." Jade spoke plainly, trying to offset the guilt Peony was so determined to shoulder. But the guilt was crushing Peony. From the window he could see those eight white trees in the garden. From this angle, he finally noticed they were arranged with space for a ninth. Every day, Peony looked out his window to that ring of death.
Jade drew the curtains quickly, plunging them in darkness. Moving to sit beside Peony, gently, he put his arms around him. Surprised he could already reach around those broad shoulders, he drew his emperor, his friend, close. Peony did not draw away.
Those shoulders that had to bear the weight of an empire, began to shake with grief that Jade wasn't sure he could contain in the circle formed by his arms. But he tried, not just out of loyalty or unrequited affection, but also out of solidarity. Loss was loss. They stayed that way, until his shirt was soaked through with tears and Peony's breathing had slowed, and only then he noticed they were mutually entwined.
There was only a private funeral- they couldn't risk putting the city in panic and the security risk was too high to consider a public appearance. Instead, Jade helped Peony plant one more tree in the garden, silently digging up spadefuls of earth, until there was a grave large enough to plant the sapling.
When they finished, it had begun to drizzle, as the mist moved in from the sea, filling the streets with fog.
"Why isn't this damn fog lifting," Peony grumbled, staring out the window, unable to even see the garden from there.
"It's like this every year," Jade said, looking at Peony's untouched lunch. "Aren't you going to eat?"
"I'm not hungry."
"Don't be stupid."
"You're stupid." With that eloquent, if juvenile retort, he brushed by Jade, wanting to just get the hell out of here, but Jade caught his wrist, forcing them face to face. "Let go of me."
"No."
"What are you going to do to stop me-"
Apparently, pin him to the wall, that crimson gaze, fixating him past the reflection of his glasses. Maybe he was too tired to resist. Maybe that was his excuse for not turning away, when he opened his mouth to protest and Jade kissed him, for the second time in so many months. But unlike the first time, fueled by desperation and hormones, his mouth was gentle, more of a caress than a kiss.
Jade was trying to comfort him. Perhaps he was the only one who could. In that split second, he gave up and let Jade do so. He could worry about consequences later, after his life had been gutted, there was just an emptiness lurking. Leaning in to capture the smooth curve of his lips, he felt Jade tense in surprise- maybe he was caught just as off guard. But it was too late. There was nothing else in the world to him except the soft sensation of Jade's fingertips brushing his cheek, filling the starving, cold spot in his chest.
It was so easy. Maybe it was experience, maybe it was something darker that had always lingered in his heart, but he found so many of his qualms slipping away like dreams he no longer remembered. Call it a failure of maturity.
It was so easy. Maybe he was taking advantage of Peony, but he took advantage of everyone. People's cruelty, people's kindness... All he could do was take it all and twist it until he got what he wanted. It was selfishness, but he didn't know what else to do. Call it the folly of youth.
"I'm sorry-" he gasped, a bruise already darkening on the pale hollow of his throat.
"No you're not," Peony murmured, carefully removing Jade's glasses. His gaze betrayed no remorse, but no malice either. Neutral, just like the day they met.
"You're right."
Outside, the fog only thickened, enshrouding the floating imperial city.
The night sky was clear, and the air warm and sultry. He had woken with a start from a dream he couldn't remember. The small fonglobe that rested on his night stand cast it's usual comforting pool of light. Tonight, it illuminated the bare curve of the sleeping seventeen year old's shoulder, partially obscured by the past shoulder length hair. It was getting longer, Peony noticed, absently braiding it. Jade didn't stir, but he was already awake. He was a light sleeper, but good at pretending for Peony's sake.
"Are you awake, Jade?" he asked, as he always did when he woke up in the middle of the night.
"Yes," Jade replied softly, turning over on his side to address him.
"I'm sorry I woke you up."
"No, it's all right," he said, looking over at Peony, who looked more tired than normal. He hadn't been sleeping well, but he almost didn't sleep at all when he was alone. "Bad dreams?"
"I can't remember. Just... a bad feeling. That creeping, unnerving feeling that you're living on borrowed time, that you can't help but look over your shoulder and half expect something to be there, to lose it all-"
"Peony. I've felt that way for my entire life. Every day I dare the world to cast judgement for my actions. But you, you haven't done anything," he said, almost kindly, "Just learn to ignore it."
"How?"
"Distract yourself."
"Help me."
Jade smiled. This was, of course, all part of their unspoken agreement, but it was fine with him. They filled the emptiness, all the cracks and spaces, with this secret. The secret of fingertips brushing, sideways glances and stolen kisses, it filled the vast space to give them an ocean to float upon. There were waves, but he would never let him go under. If a kiss was all it took to keep his head above the water, then well, that was all it took.
-
An hour. Peony had sat at his desk for an hour now, occasionally picking up a pen and then immediately putting it back down, as if he was afraid of the words he might write. But they had to be written. The words. Finally, he mustered the courage to start.
Dear Lottie
Even the way he wrote her name looked wrong. He resisted the urge to crumple it up and have it join the remains of a small tree under his desk, and powered through.
I miss you terribly. Even if you weren't here, while you were alive, I missed you. And I miss the old you. Before all those things happened. But maybe you are happier, now that you are with them. I, however, am alone now.
He frowned, examining the words on the page like he was scrutinizing a portrait. It wasn't quite right, he was trying to write an apology letter...
That's not quite right. I'm having an affair. Technically, not an affair, but there is a certain illicit nature to it that you would appreciate. Regardless, I want to apologize and let you know I'm not doing it out of disrespect for your memory...
Putting it on paper made it sound rather bad, and he was starting to regret this idea. But he had to vocalize it, even if only on paper. So that one day, he would be held accountable.
It's just that, I miss you terribly. And I need someone in this big empty palace to hold and love and I'm sorry it could not be you. Please do not think too badly of me. Someone told me, that would you have wanted me to be happy, but I have a sneaking suspicion you wouldn't mind some misery too. I love you for that. Please give my best to the children. Rest well.
Always and Forever
Your Peony
He scanned it once, to make sure there weren't any grevious spelling errors, and slipped it in an envelope and sealed it before he could take it back out and tear it to shreds. Once he stuck it in the bottom of a drawer, he felt a little better. Well, he wasn't sure he was suppose to feel better about a torrid relationship with a seventeen year old, but he had predecessors who have done worse.
"I'm leaving now," Jade said, entering unannounced. "I still don't know why you are insisting I do. Are you tired of me?" he asked jokingly.
"It pains me more than you know," Peony replied loftily. They were almost at eye level now. Ruffling his hair affectionately, he privately admired the formal imperial uniform.
"Blue suits you."
"You always say that."
"It always suits you."
"Wasn't I suppose to be here to protect you?"
"You did protect me. But I am the empire. So, now you have to go protect the empire."
They had come to the agreement that Jade fulfill his obligatory six months of military service before he came of age, on the condition he officially be ranked in the imperial forces upon his return.
"You seem to have other ideas about what you want me to do," Jade said mischievously.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Peony murmured, unfastening those tricky buttons. "You better write, or I will feel terribly used."
"Who is using who here? Additionally, you can just read my reports."
"Ever the romantic."
"The landship leaves in an hour."
"Then you better step to it, soldier." he said with a wicked grin, disguising his anxiousness for one last memory, just in case there wouldn't be any more.
Peony,
I hope you are not feeling cheap and/or used, because this is the first chance I got to sit down and compose a letter in a month. Needless to say, we are very busy containing border skirmishes. It doesn't help this landship navigates like that fat Count whose name I cannot remember. I hope I am assigned a more efficient landship on my next tour. We deserve it, since we have not suffered any casualties so far. Please believe all the rumors going on about me, they are all true. I hope you have not been assassinated. That would hamper my future somewhat, so I'd appreciate you staying alive.
Loyally,
Jade
My dear Jade,
This is actually quite strange for me, I am not used to sending letters that are not official political correspondences. Even then, someone else writes them. Consider yourself lucky. But don't consider yourself a romantic war hero figure, that does not suit you at all. Especially since the latest rumor is that you are collecting corpses from the battlefield to use in experiments of dubious natures. I hope that is true, because they deserve it, those bastards. I hope you have not become a war casualty, because that would set back my plans. Please be safe.
Royally,
Peony
Jade smiled, even as a storm howled outside and the lights would flicker inside the cramped cabin, as he reread the letter he received a week ago. Even if tomorrow there would be nothing but more blood and corpses and terrified looks from everyone on this damn ship, he could still smile in the half darkness because the emperor was still alive.
-
Peony-
I can't make this long. Tell me, no one has burned down the lab, right? I had a dream about that. Keeping very busy, I daresay we have them on the run. I have a nickname now, perhaps more like a title. They call me "Jade the Necromancer" ... at least when they think I'm out of earshot. I know you've been trying to think of a nickname for years, what do you think
-J
-
To my Necromancer-
No, I have to say that is a terrible epithet. I think you will agree with me when I say it will sound awkward being used in the throes of passion. I think. Also, the lab is fine, though I hesitate to say that they look more relaxed than usual. You'll have to come back and terrorize them soon.
Jade made it a habit to keep these letters in the inner pocket of his jacket- he would die with this letters, if it came to it. And he very nearly did, when a land mine obliterated their engine and his entire company was stranded behind enemy lines.
The scout ship that went back to the palace only reported seeing the landship Jue go up in flames.
-
I'm surprised I found paper, even as we camp, huddled in darkness and cold, waiting for just enough dawn to see where we're going, but not enough to be seen. I'm writing this letter, to you, Peony, because I will get back to deliver this. Even if we have all probably been declared dead, you will get this letter. Well, alternatively I suppose if it gets bad enough and I become a POW, I can at least hope this finds its way to you.
To be completely honest, I don't intend to die here. But the others, the survivors, they all expect to. I have to thank you for forcing me to attend school because I think, without it, I would have no idea what to do with this squad of soldiers.
I've got so much still to say-
-
Denial was the first stage of grieving, he had read. But, this wasn't denial. This was a conviction. Jade was alive and until someone brought him a body, he would continue to believe that. Yet in the darkest hours of the night. In a bed he had just gotten used to not sharing, it
preyed upon him at night. Jade, dead in a ditch. Taken as a prisoner of war. Trapped, somewhere deep underground. The death of his late wife had hit out of nowhere, but this was something that had a high likelihood of happening. Only the dread only made it worse.
Once the sun rose and he could be excused from his bed, he reminded himself Jade was in this new day with him, and on his way back to the palace. In the meantime, he had to do everything he could as an emperor to protect his empire. But no sooner had the meeting started when a runner came in, announcing the 21st regiment, the only survivors of the landship Jue had been picked up near the Rugnica plains and on its way back to the city.
It took a moment to register, before he asked- "Who is leading them?"
"Lieutenant Colonel Jade Curtiss."
The meeting was dismissed after that.
It was absolute mayhem. The moment they stepped into the city, the streets became flooded with people, everyone who wanted to get a glimpse of the soldiers who came back from the dead. They were escorted immediately to the palace, where Jade crossed the azure parquet he swore he would cross again.
Jade looked so tired, Peony observed, while having announcements made and arrangements for the other soldiers. There was only the barest curve of a smile, reassuring him. He noticed the other soldiers regarded Jade differently, with respect tempered with absolute terror. He would have to read the full statements later. For now, everyone was suppose to go home.
Barely having crossed the threshold to Peony's chambers, he found himself caught in an ambush, of Peony's alternating kisses and exclamations of relief. That he never doubted the fact he was alive. That he had been scared to death and sick with worry. That he loved him.
This was all worth coming back for, Jade thought, slipping into unconsciousness. He reassured Peony, he was all right, just very tired, and if he could stay beside him, that it would all be okay.
So, Peony did.
-
"I know I've pledged my loyalty to you and the empire already, but in reality I fought off the Kimlascan forces single handedly for this bath," Jade remarked, emerging from the bathroom, having finally scrubbed off half a month's worth of battle grime and other unpleasant things.
"Are you sure you were okay with deferring the credit? You could be a national hero. You could wear medals," Peony offered, poking his bare chest.
"I'm sure. I have a lot of things to do now that I'm back, namely check on the lab-"
"But surely you can make time for me," Peony suggested coyly.
"I don't know, can I?" he replied teasingly,
"I order you to make time for me, Jade Curtiss," he said with mock pompousness.
Jade reached out, fingers twined in that beautiful blond hair, tugging ever so slightly.
"As you wish, your majesty."
Life was entirely too short, Peony finally decided, to feel guilty about this. Jade was an adult now. Well, physically, perhaps not technically since the coming of age was a couple years off. But he already had the scars of adulthood, inside and out.
"Where did this come from, mm?" He asked, mouth tracing the dark, ragged scar on Jade's sternum. He heard his breath hitch, closing his eyes as if he remember that very moment.
"We were ambushed our third night in Kimlascan territory-"
"I have a report I can read if I wanted to know exactly. I just wanted to inform you I think scars are very sexy."
"You're absolutely ridiculous," Jade replied, smiling whilst pulling the other closer and at the same time pulling his clothes off. He had missed him and even though at some point he had thought he could go through life distantly wanting, now that he had it became a craving in his body. He couldn't help think to himself how perfectly they fit together and wonder how exactly Peony drew out increasingly indecent reactions from him.
Thankfully there was none of the tension from their initial trysts, when he was caught between loving Jade and hating himself for trespassing upon untreaded territory. Those long pale limbs had lost none of their grace in war, only marked with the scars of experience.
But Jade told him off soon enough, surprisingly eager to indulge in the company of his lord and lover. He had missed everything about him, from Peony's endless variations of concerned expressions, to the silence punctuated only by soft, quiet gasping.
-
There was peace, for a few years after that. Tempered by the fearsome rumors of the immortal Necromancer who led the Malkuthian landships into danger and out unscathed, they maintained an uneasy truce so that, even briefly, people could go back to living.
And creating and engineering more terrible tools of war.
But death does not always come from outside the city walls. Sometimes it comes from the inside, abrupt and unannounced. What started as a mild, but persistent cough became constant headaches and a low burning fever. Jade cursed the seventh fonists who did nothing, he cursed the disease, and most of all he cursed himself.
"How are you feeling?" Jade asked softly, replacing the damp cloth on Peony's forehead. The emperor's gaze was glassy, but he managed a smile.
"You shouldn't be here so much, I don't want you to get sick-"
"They said I can't," Jade said, with a hint of bitterness. "How did we overlook this?"
"Malkuth's monarch's have always died young. We want to leave good looking corpses."
"You can't be that vain."
"I could-" his next words were cut off by a violent cough, wracking his entire wasted body. It was the symptoms of the miasma poisoning, except there was no miasma. Only blank stares and ineffective cures. It was not going to be an easy death either.
Clenching his palms, he waited until it passed, wordlessly handing him a glass of water. "Try to go to sleep-"
"Not tired. Plus, we have to plan your coming of age party," he said, the old spark of merriment lingering in those haunted eyes. "You've come such a long way... I hope I make it."
"You will," Jade said, squeezing his hand. "You have to." He was turning twenty and then he'd have to face the world alone. It was not a pleasant prospect.
"There's something I need you to do for me. I trust you," he said, drawing him close, whispering in his ear.
"I can't do that, Peony. I can't-"
"You will," Peony said firmly, leaning back on the pillows. "No one else can. Somehow, you'll find a way to bring him back. And then, you will help him lead this country to greatness."
"I was suppose to help you," Jade wanted to say, but he held his tongue. This was not the first time he had to stand by and watch the person he loved most die. But it was harder to do this time.
Three days later, was the eve of his twentieth birthday. Most newly marked adults go out, they carouse, they celebrate. He did none of that. When the clock struck midnight, he nudged Peony's arm, gently, to wake him.
"It's midnight."
"I know. Happy Birthday, Jade. I'm sorry there isn't a cake."
"I hate cake."
"I know. But you have to make a wish..."
"I'll figure something out."
"You know... even if my life was a long string of events that don't really make any sense in the end... I have surprisingly few regrets. Least of all you. Never forget that." It took all of the dying emperor's effort to raise his hand, just to brush against Jade's cheek, and draw him closer, kissing him for what would be the last time.
"I won't." Jade whispered, even as Peony's breathing slowed and his chest went still, marking the death of the eighth monarch of the empire.
On the nightstand, rested that fonglobe, which glowed tirelessly for so many days and years. Finally, it could rest, as Jade tapped it, once, extinguishing it's azure light. Then he curled up beside Peony, because he remembered that he hated to sleep alone.