PLEASE READ!

I am writing a novel, and wanted to no if anyone would/could read my first chapter and critique it for me?

Also, I made a tumblr LOL

jamielikeselephants . tumblr . com

^FOLLOW :3

"Mm," Dro murmurs as I redress in front of him. My whole body blushes, and I hurry with clipping my bra on. "You're still nervous around me, really?" He raises his eyebrows and I grin.

"Well it's not everyday someone moans at seeing my body." I push my hair out of my eyes and pull on a gray shirt. "They would if they saw your body." Dro is grinning now, his teeth looking extra white against his tanned skin. "What's on the agenda for today, babe?" A tingle runs down my spine when Dro calls me babe. He doesn't let me respond, and instead kisses me.

His kisses always begin the same. Unsure and soft, but when he knows I'll kiss him back he turns into a hungry lion, in the sexiest way of course. A few minutes into the kissing, my phone rings. Hesitantly Dro pulls away and grabs it off the bed to hand to me. I see the name, and for a minute I am considering pressing the mute button, but don't.

"Hello?" I say quietly.

"Gwen, hey, it's Maddy. Duncan is passed out on the floor and I'm trying to stay calm but he won't wake up and…I'm scared."

I look at Dro for a moment, his sparkling light eyes and gorgeous lips. My mouth waters while my heart thumps of worry. "Maddy, stay calm. I'll be right over." I promise her, and the conversation ends at that. "When will you be back?" He asks me, and I shrug. "Soon."

We kiss each other for only a moment, and I hurry out of the door.

NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

While I am silently cursing myself for not owning a car, I am thanking my Mom and Duncan's parents to live so close to each other.

I turn the corner onto Duncan's street, and his brown and white house stands out with all the others. It's the biggest, for one, and the colors don't match any of the weird green and pink houses around. Sadly, it's why my Mom liked this place. When we bought the house it was originally blue and orange, but Mom got Duncan and I to paint it a few years back, and now it was a very pastel pink.

I only have to knock on the door twice before a pretty girl with brown hair answers.

"Maddy is upstairs. Hi, I'm Aubrey." We shake hands, and hurry up the stairs.

I see Duncan first, then Maddy. She has moved him from the floor to the bed—God knows how—and is holding his head. Once I see his adorable face, I run. I run not only for him, but for us.

All emotions of angry and annoyance flush out of my body, only to be replaced by worry. "Duncan?" I say as I grab onto his cheeks. No response, but I was expecting that. "How long has he been out?"

Maddy shakes her head quickly. "I don't know. Me and Aubrey were downstairs and I came up here and saw him. Only a minute or two before I called you." I am reaching for my phone when she finishes. "Maddy, call 911. I'm going to try and wake him up."

Maddy nods, taking my phone from my hands. They go downstairs, and it is just me and Duncan.

Only I guess it doesn't count, because he might be dead. Dead. The word lingers in my mind and I instantly regret saying it, because I feel tears prickling out of my eyes. One lands on his nose, and I kiss it off.

I call his name multiple times, shake him a little, but I don't get any response.

"Ambulance is coming!" I hear Maddy shout, and when she does I burst into sobs.

NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

I wonder if this is how Duncan felt when I fell down the stairs.

Looking at me, wanting to hold me and kiss me and tell me that I'm fine and everything will be okay.

They pumped his stomach, wouldn't let me watch. I guess he took a shit load of some pills he found, but they wouldn't tell me what kind or how many, if they even knew.

Maddy went to go get coffee, which is only appropriate considering it's running on three in the morning. "How long have we been here?" Maddy had asked me. "Too long," I muttered back. She only nodded in agreement.

That was hours ago…My butt feels numb as so does my back. How long how I been sitting in this chair?

I crack my neck and sigh. There is no one around, no one but me and the nurse.

Where is Maddy? A male nurse with blue scrubs winks at me, and I turn in disgust. I should have gone home and changed…I am sitting here, in the too-cold waiting room, wearing nothing but a tiny gray tank top and shorts that are so short they shouldn't even be considered shorts.

I see Maddy in the distance, but she isn't holding coffee. She is running to me, full frontal running.

I stand up. "He's awake! Come on!"

She crashes into me and we both walk quickly to the elevator, feeling awkward when we are greeted by an elderly woman going out of the elevator. I click the fourth floor button, and Maddy starts to cry.

"He's okay, Maddy. Don't cry."

I soothe her and pat her back until the gray doors open again. "Room 218," She tells me.

Everything is blur from then. When I finally go back into my regular state, I am looking at the closed door. "Nurse in, do not enter." Maddy reads the sign on the door.

I hear Duncan groan in pain, my hands itch to open the door. It seems like hours, but finally we move out of the way so the tiny and adorable nurse can leave. The nurse looks at me when we hear Duncan groan in pain again.

"That boy does not like catheters!" She giggles in an annoying high pitched voice, and walks away.

It would have been comical if I wasn't so eager to see Duncan, when Maddy and I practically fought each other to enter the room. I let Maddy in first, and when she sees Duncan she cries.

"Hey now, stop whining." His voice is so hoarse it doesn't even sound like him. "You scared the shit out of me!" Maddy cries and hits him lightly on the arm. "Language," He tells her.

He stares at Maddy for a minute or two before finally recognizing I was even in the room. He doesn't speak, and neither do I. We simply stare at each other, so intensely that Maddy coughs to break the tension.

"Gwen and I rode with you in the ambulance." Maddy says. "Cool." Was all Duncan said in reply.

"I'll be right back…" Maddy mutters before leaving the room.

We stare in silence for a minute, before I give him a weak smile.

"Hey."

"Sup, whore?"

His response catches me off guard. "Huh?" I say cautiously, making my way to his bed.

"You. Alejandro. Sucky sucky. Oh, don't give me that look Gwen. We both know you know exactly what I'm talking about."

Instead of breaking down, I stand up a little taller. "You. Courtney. Fucky fucky."

He chuckles, but I don't think it's because he found it humorous. "We didn't, and you know it."

"Do I?" I counter.

"Yeah, you do. Gwen…why the FUCK would you do this to me?" Anger is obvious in his tone.

"I didn't do anything." I say quietly.

"Fuck Gwen! You're MINE, get it? Only mine!" He is breathing oddly.

"Duncan, calm down. Your heart rates out of whack."

He brings his hands up to rub his eyes, and I see the numerous needles poking into his skin.

"I love you, a lot. Too much. And when I was told of your little sex party, I lost it."

"Who told you?"

"That doesn't matter, I—"

"Yes, Duncan. It does matter."

I sit in the chair beside him, and I sigh of relief when I take his hand and he doesn't jerk away.

"I hate you for being so damn beautiful." He whispers to me.

"I hate you for making me love you so much." I kiss his hand.

"Do you think…do you think us will ever work?" He asks me, and I am silent. "I don't know." I say quietly. "But I do know I love you." I murmur into his hand.

"Marry me?"

I don't respond, not sure if he said what I thought he said. "Huh?"

"Marry me. After high school, once we both have cars and jobs. I want to marry you."

My heart beats quickly in my chest. "Duncan…"

"No, listen. I love you more than I love myself. I want you, so bad. I would fuck you silly, anywhere and anytime. I would, right now. Right here. I want to marry you. We fit with each other, Gwen. We need each other. Don't even bother telling me we don't."

I swallow hard, and smile. "I would fuck you silly too, Duncan."

"Is that a yes?" He wiggles his eyebrows at me and smiles.

"Yes, Duncan. I will marry you. But only after high school."

"Promise?" He says.

"I pinky promise." We smile at each other for the longest time, and seal the deal with a kiss.

"When I get out of here, I'm beating the fuck out of Alejandro." He whispers into my ear.

Instead of replying, I just kiss him again.

I just wanted to thank everyone for reviewing and reading this fanfic. I had so much fun with it, and anyone reading this and want more just subscribe to me/favorite me and I'll be uploading for Total Drama DxG stuff soon. Thanks again, guys.