A/N: Part of a series of vignettes. Warnings for this chapter are genderbend, vague one-sided het (if you squint), and language. Beta'd by yiraheerai on LJ.

Shisui grunted, hoisting an unconscious Kakashi's arm more securely over her shoulder. He made an indistinguishable noise against her neck, knees sagging. She adjusted him again and started towards the elevator.

In retrospect, the spiked heels had been a really terrible idea, but she hadn't expected to be doing anything more strenuous than standing around for a while politely declining cocktails and nursing a can of soda from the downstairs vending machine, and all her flat shoes were from Timberland or the skate shop across from Starbucks anyway.

"...You draw the short straw tonight, Shisui?"

The voice belonged to one of the paralegals-the suck-up one, Izumo, with the emo hair. He was leaning against the wall, looking at her sympathetically; Kotetsu, the smart-ass paralegal who might as well have been Izumo's parasitic twin, was on his left side. Judging by the grin on his face, he found the whole affair considerably more amusing than Izumo did.

Shisui paused, hoisting Kakashi into a more stable position. Again. She fought the instinct to cringe at the smell of cheap vodka on his breath. "You know I'm always DD. Not really the partying type."

Kotetsu laughed, a good-natured, warm sound, and she started to smile back when his eyes locked on her chest.

"I'll say you're a DD, Shisui," he said, the words weighty with innuendo. Izumo dug his elbow into Kotetsu's side; Shisui struggled against her knee-jerk first reaction, which was to drop Kakashi and ram her forearm into Kotetsu's throat.

Calm down. He's annoying, but harmless, she told herself, and started walking towards the elevator again, barking a humorless laugh over her shoulder to get across the message that she was not at all amused by this misogynistic fuckery. Kakashi lifted his head from her shoulder, stumbling a little at the change in angle.

"She can and will castrate you if you keep on like that," he slurred, and dropped his head back on her shoulder like nothing had happened. "She'll probably win the court case, too."

Shisui smiled, adjusted Kakashi again, and finished her trek to the elevator, squeezing his wrist affectionately.

"Hey, Izumo, you mind hiding her letter opener tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I'm not going anywhere near her desk. You might consider investing in a good jockstrap, though. Or a chastity belt."

"...Thank you so much for your unending support."

"It's your own fault for poking a sleeping dragon with a sharp stick."

Kakashi dropped the 'unconscious' act as soon as they made it into the parking garage, taking most of his own weight. He kept his hand on Shisui's shoulder for the sake of balance; he might not have been piss-drunk, but he was still too plastered to drive, and his head buzzed noisily.

"Keys," Shisui said, stopping outside the passenger side of Kakashi's beat-up toyota. He dug into his pocket and handed them to her; she stuck them in the lock, grumbling about ancient death-traps with hand-crank windows, then pulled open his door for him.

"If you puke, I'm not cleaning it up," she said cheerfully, slamming the door. He could faintly hear the click-click of her heels echoing in the parking garage as she made her way around to the driver's side.

She opened the door and slid in, shutting it with a slam that echoed longer and louder than her shoes.

...Kakashi had to be really drunk, if he was angsting over the sound of a pair of stilettos.

Shisui sat for a moment in the driver's seat, her head back against the rest, eyes closed, chin tilted up to bare her long, white throat. A chain glinted at the base of it-the pendant wasn't visible, but Kakashi knew that it was a small lotus flower, cheaply done in cubic zirconium, but it was pretty. He'd given it to her for her twenty-fifth birthday.

"You okay?" he asked, voice rough and jarring in the muted silence of the car. Shisui opened one eye and glanced lazily at him, dark red lips pulling together into a humorless smile. She sat up and buckled her seat belt, then stuck the key in the ignition.

"I'm fine. It's not like I don't get it every goddamn time I leave my apartment," she said, tone flippant-but it was definitely bothering her more than she was letting on. She'd known exactly what he was talking about without missing a beat.

It was probably the alcohol, but he couldn't see a reason to stop staring at her as she backed out of the parking space and drove his car with an ease that came with decades of carpooling. At this point, she knew the car almost better than he did. Like a baby, only without the diaper-changing and midnight feedings. Or the sex.

…really fucking plastered.

He zoned out to the image of her profile, her eyes fixed on the road, dark hair curling around the nape of her neck, jaw clenched so minutely she probably didn't even realize it herself. Bars of light moved over her face as they passed streetlamps, lights from buildings, lights from police cars.

Eight years ago, she'd been beautiful, clutching his hand like it was her only anchor to sanity as she stared at the glittering buildings on the Cambridge side of the Charles. The lights in their particular subway car had gone out; the streetlamps and the glow from the city-scape had been the only respite from the darkness. They'd made the tears on her face stand out brilliantly, almost as bright as the lights themselves.

She was still beautiful, but the years had hardened her. Kakashi couldn't remember the last time he'd seen her cry. But when you'd been with someone for fifteen-odd years, you got to know the little signs that meant they weren't okay, even when they were doing their best to keep their mask on for the rest of the world.

He let his hand flop over the edge of his seat until the back of it brushed against Shisui's. Her fingers twitched lightly, then relaxed, and when he looked back up again, her jaw had loosened a little.

The rest of the trip passed in silence, but the warmth of Kakashi's hand against hers made the very important distinction between 'painful silence' and 'comfortable silence'. Sometimes, Shisui wondered if her life would be easier if she were interested in his equipment; he had been there for every single major life trauma she'd been through, and his quiet support through all of it had him firmly associated with 'safety' in her mind.

But they'd been there already, and it had failed miserably. The important part was the companionship, even if there was the occasional look held a little too long, or silence a little bit more uncomfortable than safe.

She backed his car into his driveway and turned off the ignition. Kakashi had fallen asleep on the way, his head sagging against his shoulder. Not once had his hand dropped from where it was touching hers.

She felt her mouth pull into a smile, and shook him by the shoulder. He startled, sitting up rigidly, and turned to look at her, eyes bloodshot.

"...Guy is going to kill me," he said casually. Shisui laughed and reached over, ruffling his hair. He rolled his eyes and unbelted, opening the car door.

Shisui followed, shivering a little as she stepped into the bitingly chill air. "I am really glad I don't have a way to get home until tomorrow. You think he'll let me listen in, or try to sequester you off somewhere to lecture you about your uncool behavior?"

Kakashi walked towards the front walk, lightly catching Shisui's elbow as he passed her. "Ice," he said, and his other hand went to the small of her back. "Not the best thing in the world to pair with stilettos."

Guy had dutifully scattered the front walk with ice melt, but Shisui let Kakashi's hand stay resting on her back. It was warm, and the night was fucking freezing.

The door was unlocked, as usual, and they hustled inside and slammed it shut to keep out the frigid air. Not that it was much warmer inside; Kakashi's housemate believed in keeping the thermostat at sixty-five to save the planet and prove the strength of his constitution. When Kakashi had complained, Guy had knit him an enormous, lumpy sweater and matching socks out of bright green uruguay wool. Shisui had kidnapped the sweater when it became apparent Kakashi was never going to wear it; she had boobs of steel, which made her look cute in basically everything. He'd kept the socks, though, which was a shame, especially if they were as warm as the sweater.

Shisui kicked off her heels, letting out a sigh as her feet hit the floor at a normal angle for the first time in six hours. She hung her coat on an empty peg and wandered out of the mudroom, the hardwood floor cold through her nylons.

"You can borrow something of mine to sleep in," Kakashi called, still in the process of unlacing his own shoes. "The toothbrush you used last time you stayed is still in the downstairs bathroom-"

"Welcome home, rival!"

Shisui made for the stairs, chuckling as Guy's heavy footsteps thudded into the front hall from somewhere near the back of the house-probably the kitchen.

"-an invigorating, youthful party-? ...Kakashi, are you intoxicated?"

"Ah, more like buzzed. I'm fine, really-"

"THIS IS NOT WHAT I MEANT WHEN I TOLD YOU TO EMBRACE YOUR INNER YOUTH!"

The strains of Guy's lecture on the uncoolness of death by alcohol poisoning, punctuated by gravelly, sarcastic counterpoints from Kakashi, carried all the way upstairs and drowned out the last insistent vestiges of the past trying to worm inside Shisui's mind, leaving a warm, fuzzed-over feeling to pool in her stomach.

There was something about a girl wrapped up in your sweatpants and one of your shirts, the waistband of the pants hanging loosely around her full hips, the collar of the shirt threatening to slip off her shoulder.

Kakashi was very, very deliberately not thinking about the way the front of his shirt stretched over her chest. What Kotetsu said had been assy, sure, but it had also been true; she was curvy all over, balancing out her tits, but they still drew the eye. Fact of nature.

But the last thing Shisui needed was yet another person on the list of people who said hello to her breasts, so he ignored them and focused on the rat's nest of her hair and the faint stain of lipstick that she hadn't been able to wipe off completely. He pressed his thumb into the arch of her foot, and she hissed softly, pushing against his hand.

"I fucking hate high heels," she mumbled, pressing her forearm against her eyes. "Gimme construction boots any day. I don't care how dykey they make me look."

"Well, you are a dyke. Shouldn't be that unexpected for you to look the part," Kakashi mused, pressing harder. "Although, the lipstick look suits you, too. You should femme up more often."

Shisui grinned and kicked his stomach. "Don't push it. If I thought I could get away with flannel in court, I'd be the happiest woman alive." She tipped her head back against the pillow Guy had laid out for her and closed her eyes, sighing. Her jaw was slack.

Kakashi rested his hand over her ankle, watching the rise and fall of her stomach as she breathed. "It's a sign of maturity, you know. I seem to remember sneakers and a track suit the first three Christmas parties Obito dragged me to."

Shisui didn't open her eyes, but she did reach down and wrap her fingers around Kakashi's arm.

"He was the fun cousin," she said, quietly. "You know, I never told him why I broke up with you. He was furious-didn't speak to me for a month." She opened one eye. "But I have a feeling if I'd told him, he would have been on my side."

"Never understood how your parents could have a daughter like you and give you up voluntarily." Shisui's thumb moved in a semi-circle across the underside of Kakashi's arm. He shot her a smile. "They're still having those Christmas parties, you know. I drive by on my way to the grocery store. You should go."

Shisui laughed, hand falling from Kakashi's arm. The place where it had been prickled with the sudden loss of warmth.

"Throw it in their faces now that I have my shiny new career and my shiny new law degree? Sounds fucking ace," she said, kicking Kakashi in the stomach again. "Kinda wish Obito could be here to see it."

Kakashi lifted Shisui's feet from his lap and stood, laying them back down on the couch. He pulled the heavy spare comforter over her legs and wrapped it around her shoulders, pausing with his hand there.

"He would have been proud of you, Shisui," he said, leaning forward to kiss her forehead, briefly. Her skin was warm under his mouth.

He straightened up and turned to leave, but the brush of her fingers against his wrist stopped him. He glanced back over his shoulder, breath quickening slightly at the sight of her on her side, curled under the blankets.

"Goodnight, jackass," she murmured, and let her hand drop.

"Goodnight, you humorless feminazi," he said back as she closed her eyes, then reached out and punched him in the hip with unnerving accuracy.

"Get the hell outta here," she said sleepily, pulling the blankets over her head.

Kakashi padded out of the living room and towards the stairs, switching off lights as he went. He left the one in the living room, where Shisui was sleeping, on as dimly as it would go, just in case.