12 Days

A/N: Hello, everyone! Welcome to Wraith Ink-Slinger's 12 Days of Criminal Minds! I will have a holiday-themed oneshot up for all of you every day, starting today (December 14th, that is) and ending on December 25th- Christmas, of course! This is just a collection of oneshots which are not connected in any way unless otherwise indicated. I really hope you guys enjoy this collection, no matter how you celebrate the winter solstice!

Oh, plus, JJ will be in all of these because I think it will be much happier with her there.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything recognizable. Including, but not limited to: Criminal Minds, the characters, Christmas, or the "12 Days of Christmas".

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Day 1: Decorating Disaster

When Emily Prentiss walked into the bullpen the morning of December first, her line of sight was assaulted with a small Christmas explosion. Someone had been very busy decorating yesterday evening…

Garlands were hung around the perimeter of all the desks and wrapped around the railing of the catwalk, wreaths adorned every visible office door, paper snowflakes dangled from various points around the room and anything vaguely resembling a pole had been wrapped in red ribbon to look candy-striped. Ribbon and wreaths hung on the walls close to the ceiling and, Emily noted as she was already looking up, there was an odd lack of mistletoe.

There was also an odd lack of her colleagues. Hotch, Rossi and JJ already appeared to be in their respective offices, but Morgan and Reid were nowhere to be seen. There was no telling if Garcia had yet arrived. A quick peek into the break room showed it had received the same decoration treatment, but did not give Emily any clues as to where her two, possibly three, unusually late coworkers were. Then, just as Emily decided to shrug it off and sit down at her desk, one mystery was solved and another, much more interesting, one opened up. "So has this helped make up for yesterday's debacle?" Garcia could be heard as she neared the bullpen.

"Yes, but I believe we each have one more favor stored." Reid's voice followed the feisty tech's.

"What do you mean? I gave you guys a ride, we stopped for coffee… how many favors are you going to call in, here?"

"Three each." Morgan replied.

"Exactly- one for each injury suffered per person." Reid said.

Emily's eyebrows went up as Garcia, Morgan and Reid finally came within view of her desk. "What happened to you guys?" She gasped, looking Morgan and Reid up and down.

Both her coworkers were bandaged and bruised in some way; Morgan sported a black eye and a large bandage over his left hand while Reid's right hand and forearm were encased in cast and a bandage similar to Morgan's covered the space above his right eyebrow. Both men and Garcia looked rather miffed to say the least. "We helped Garcia decorate." Reid said by way of explanation.

"Oh!" Emily laughed. "You two should know better than to answer your phones on November 30th."

"I forgot today was the first." Morgan shrugged.

"I generally enjoy helping decorate. This," Reid said, holding up his cast, nearly knocking Morgan in the head and causing the larger man to jump back. "Has never happened before."

"I still say I don't owe you two much of anything. It's your own fault- you're accident prone…" Garcia began.

"No, Reid's accident prone," Morgan cut in, ignoring Reid's protest, "The only thing that happened to me was you and Reid."

"Excuse me, did I force you to slice your hand open with a box cutter?" Reid asked indignantly. "I don't think so. You were the one who insisted "No, the kid's going to cut his fingers off, let me open the boxes"."

"Okay, first of all, I do not sound like that. Ever. Second…"

"We are digressing from the point!" Garcia said loudly, waving a hand at the arguing men. "Not only did you two inflict most of those injuries on yourselves, you left me to finish decorating alone after taking Reid to the emergency room."

"I was afraid I if I came back to help finish after I got the cast on that I would break something far more essential than my wrist!" Reid defended, waving the cast in the air and nearly clipping Morgan again.

"Man, would you stop waving that thing around?" Morgan asked, grabbing Reid's arm and placing it back at his side then addressing Garcia. "And you were singing a different tune yesterday while we were driving to the hospital."

"Well, yeah, he looked so pitiful, all bleeding and broken…" Garcia lamented, pointing accusingly at Reid. "I would have agreed to almost anything at that point."

"I did not…" Reid began to argue, only to be cut off Emily's laughter.

Morgan, Garcia and Reid all turned to glare at her and she shook her head. "Sorry, sorry…" She gasped, still smiling. "It's not funny that you're both hurt, but… what happened?"

The three FBI employees glanced at each other and seemed to think for a moment before they began to tell the tale of yesterday evening's decorating disaster.

"Remind me why, again, I'm doing this?" Morgan asked, placing the last box of Christmas decorations on the floor by the others and straightening up.

"Because you love me." Garcia answered easily as she came out of her office, wielding a box cutter, before adding as an afterthought, "And because you were the only one besides Reid who actually answered your phone."

"Yeah, well, I thought this was important." Morgan muttered.

"This is important. Now Reid and I finally have a helper. You don't think the office gets so fabulously Christmassy on its own every year, now do you?" The blonde asked before tossing the box cutter to Reid, who fumbled slightly, but caught the object.

The genius pushed the blade up out of its sheath and was about to begin slicing open boxes when Morgan interrupted. "Nuh-uh, gimme that thing before you cut your fingers off, kid."

Reid scowled and did not hand the tool over. "I'm not a child and I am perfectly capable of operating a dull box cutter without injuring myself. I've opened the boxes of decorations every year before now and, unsurprisingly, I still have all 10 digits to show for it."

"Aw, let him have his fun my handsome helper." Garcia told the young profiler. "I guess if he's going to help out he should at least get to play with sharp things."

Heaving a long-suffering sigh, Reid pushed the blade back down and tossed the tool to Morgan, who caught it with ease. The older agent grinned winningly at the other two before starting in on the cardboard containers.

Within the next 10 minutes, most of the boxes had been broken into and Reid and Garcia were digging through their contents while Morgan worked on the last of the bonds. Reid was piling garland neatly by his desk and Garcia was rifling through a box of wreaths when she suddenly let out a shriek and jumped back from the box. Both men jumped as well, Reid dropping the gold garland he was winding up and Morgan shouting in pain. "What happened?" Reid asked, looking from Garcia to Morgan and back again.

"I thought a saw a spider in the box… why did you shout, stud muffin?" Garcia explained, looking over at Morgan.

"Because… you made me jump while I was cutting a box open." Morgan winced and held up his hand, revealing an already bleeding gash across the top.

Garcia winced and hissed in sympathy. "Oh, go wash that off, I'll find you a bandage…" She said quickly, moving over so she could nudge him in the direction of the bathroom.

"Who's going to slice their fingers off…?" Reid muttered, earning a light smack and 'hush' from Garcia.

-/\-

Later, when Morgan's hand had been sufficiently bandaged, the three decorators sat digging carefully through the boxes and listening to the carols Garcia had set up in the background. Suddenly, the relative peace was broken by Morgan's low chuckle. Reid and Garcia looked in his direction and he held up a bag of mistletoe, grinning. "Really, baby girl?"

"Hey, it's up every year, it's not my fault most people don't notice." Garcia replied with a mischievous smile.

Morgan shook his head and placed the bag to the side, going on with his excavation of decorations. When another 10 minutes had passed, however, he found himself unable to stop scratching at his hand. Drawing it out of the box and glancing at his palm, his eyes widened. "You gotta be kidding me!" He said loudly, drawing both his colleagues' attention once more.

"What…" Reid began to ask as Morgan turned to show them his right hand this time.

Garcia and Reid's eyes widened as well when they found the palm was covered in raised welts. "What the Hell is going on?" Morgan asked, rubbing carefully at his palm. "What did you two put in this box?"

"Just some lights and the… mistletoe." Reid replied, realization lighting up in his eyes. "You're probably having an allergic reaction to the mistletoe. You know, that particular plant, Phoradendron flavescens, is highly poisonous to people when ingested and…"

"Well I didn't swallow it, I just touched the bag." Morgan said irritably.

"There was probably some transferred to the outside of the bag by whoever was putting the mistletoe in it." Reid shrugged. "Go wash your hands again. I have some Benadryl in my bag you can take."

Morgan looked sorely tempted to question why Reid carried Benadryl around with him, but seemed to decide against it as headed for the bathroom once more.

-/\-

Two incidents now well in hand, no pun intended, the decorating continued. After gulping down the appropriate dosage of Benadryl- as insisted by Reid- the hives on Morgan's hand had at least stopped itching and he returned to helping and avoiding anything that resembled mistletoe. "Hey, Reid!" Garcia called off the balcony to the genius who was winding garland around table tops. "Bring me that box, would you?"

Reid turned to the box Garcia was pointing to- one full of Christmas lights- and nodded. "Sure!" He called back, hefting the surprisingly heavy box up and heading towards the catwalk.

"Watch out! Reid!" Garcia called, too late, however.

Failing to see Morgan, who was heading his way with an armful of garland, Reid walked right into the larger man, sending them both toppling to the bottom of the catwalk in a tangle of bodies, lights, garland and one box. Garcia squeaked in surprise and rushed down after them. "Guys? Are you okay?" She asked frantically, tugging Morgan, who was closer to her, into a sitting position.

"I am this close to actually believing these decorations are cursed." Morgan muttered gruffly as he stood up off the floor.

He held a hand over his left eye, which was already beginning to show signs of abuse and turned to Reid. "You okay, Kid?" He sighed, looking down at the genius still on the floor.

Reid rolled off the now crushed box he had landed on and gasped for air, coughing. "Reid?" Morgan asked again, sounding slightly worried as he pulled his friend into a sitting position.

The younger man continued gasping and coughing for a moment longer before he nodded. "Knocked the wind out of me…" He rasped, standing up and wincing as he did so, clutching his ribs.

"Are you guys alright?" Garcia asked, breathing a little easier, herself, now that both men were standing.

Both nodded and Reid looked sheepishly down at the mess of décor. "Sorry about that…"

-/\-

Later, still, things had progressed uneventfully. Morgan was seeing to the lighting-up of the Christmas lights, none of which had been damaged in his and Reid's impromptu trip to the floor. Reid was up on a ladder, hanging wreaths near the ceiling to accompany the ribbon already hanging there, and Garcia was flitting about the room doing whatever odd jobs she saw necessary. She was busy carrying a bag of bows past Reid as he came down from the ladder and bent over to pick up the box of wreaths when she noticed his look of discomfort. "Hey, now, why are you wincing?" She asked, turning to face him.

"What?" Reid asked, unconvincingly feigning ignorance. "I'm not wincing."

"Oh, yes you are." Garcia said, poking him in the chest, causing him to hiss slightly in pain. "See? Wincing. What's wrong, sweet cheeks?"

"Nothing, it's just a few bruises from landing on the box." Reid shrugged.

Garcia narrowed her eyes at him before poking him gently in the ribs, causing him to shift in discomfort again. "A few bruises, my eye. Lemme see." She said, beginning to pop open the buttons of Reid's shirt.

"Garcia!" Reid shouted, his voice gaining half an octave as he clutched his shirt shut, blushing.

"Oh, relax, you don't have anything I haven't seen before." Garcia told him, pushing his hands out of the way so she had a better view of the state of his chest. "Yikes…"

Reid's "few bruises" turned out to be more of one large bruise than anything. Garcia ran a finger over the angular edges caused by the box edges, causing Reid to shiver. "I'm fine. It's just a bruise." He said adamantly, buttoning his shirt, grabbing a wreath and climbing the ladder once more.

The tech sighed as she watched him climb before shaking her head. "I'm beginning to agree with Morgan…" She said to herself, grabbing her bag of bows and walking away.

"Agree with me about what?" Morgan asked as she walked by where he was fiddling with the lights.

"That the decorations are cursed, hot stuff." Garcia replied, stopping for a moment to watch Morgan work.

"Are you sure he should be up on that ladder, then?" The agent asked, jerking a thumb towards Reid.

"Better him than you. You're having worse luck than him today."

No sooner had the words left Garcia's mouth than did Reid lose his footing on the ladder and fall to the floor, banging his head on the way down. Before either the analyst of the agent could react beyond a shout of "Reid!", the genius had sat up and spouted off a few words unbefitting of someone with such a high vocabulary.

Morgan and Garcia came to his side, and helped him up. "Reid, you're bleeding…" Garcia said, gesturing to the gash above his eyebrow.

"I think…" Reid tested his wristed carefully and winced. "Yes, I definitely did something unpleasant to my wrist…"

Already the joint had begun swelling. "Alright, that's it. I think you need to go to the hospital." Morgan said adamantly.

"Agreed." Reid nodded, watching the skin puff out.

"I'll drive." Garcia said, heading for her purse.

When the story came to a close- not without interruptions on the three storytellers' parts- Emily looked rather bemused. "You know, if I wouldn't have been fearing for life and limb, I'd almost have liked to see that…" She said finally.

Morgan and Reid scowled at the female agent, who gave them an unapologetic smile, and Garcia sighed. "All right, all right. One more favor each. Then that's it- my debt shall be repaid." She said, her tone suggesting she would not budge on the matter.

Morgan smiled and pecked her on the cheek. "Thanks, baby girl, but I'm gonna save my favor for when I need a good time." He winked and sat down at his desk.

"I can't wait." Garcia replied with a wicked grin before turning to Reid. "And how about you, my dear genius?"

Reid seemed to think for a moment before walking up to his desk, scooping up the folders waiting there in this left arm and handing them off to Garcia. "Reid… this is a lot of paperwork!" Garcia said, heaving the stack onto her hip.

"I know… my right arm is in a cast, though, how can I be expected to do the parts which require writing?" He asked innocently.

Garcia narrowed her eyes at him before huffing and heading for her office. "You're really pushing it, brain boy!" She called before she shut the door.

There was silence for a moment before Emily spoke. "She does know you're ambidextrous, doesn't she?"

Reid grinned and sat down at his cleared desk. "I see no reason for that to enter into the equation just yet."

-/\-

Of course, it wouldn't be the 12 Days of CM without its namesake. The following is sung to the tune of "The Twelve Days of Christmas." I will not be held responsible for any weird looks you get if you choose to sing this out loud.

On the first day of Christmas, the new case gave to me…

A psycho on a killing spree!

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A/N: Wow… a LOT longer than I intended… but I hope you enjoyed! They won't all be so long, though. See you all tomorrow! Happy December Fourteenth!