Disclaimer: I own nothing related to The Mentalist, and I'm really not certain a disclaimer is needed for an author's note but as a dutiful law student I shall conform.

A/N: Hello Readers! For some reason I'm getting lots of alerts tonight that ya'll are out there adding me to your favourite author/story lists and signing up for update alerts despite my slackness at posting anything new. So, I feel I should thank you, and promise you this; I finish school at the end of this month, so new stuff for El Scorcho, Conversion and World Your Rock will be up by mid May. Most likely El Scorcho first cause I've been planning it more in my head between study sessions.

I haven't actually had the time to watch the past season of The Mentalist so I'll be catching up in May. To that end, I can't really write anything current so I'm going to start a new story come June that doesn't need to heed timelines. It's going to be called, "The Three Times Patrick Jane Met Someone Smarter Than Him and The One Time He Didn't (But Did)". Maybe. It depends on how many words FF Net will let me jam into a title.

Preview (Please turn off your cell phones and other electronic devices now so you don't disturb the other moviegoers):

Chapter 1: House MD-remake of the first episode of House in which Robin Tunney ate some bad pork. Jane will eat the unclean meant this time and House will impart the kind of Houseian advice to Jane that makes every patient the salty doctor treats rethink their lives.

Chapter 2: The Big Bang Theory-A secret, test version, government laser goes missing from California Tech. The CBI is sent to investigate. Jane encounters the phenomena that is Dr. Sheldon Cooper

Chapter 3: Sherlock- Now that Sherlock Holmes has successfully faked his own death he needs to find Moriarty's henchmen and eliminate them. Jane is about to find out there's always a bigger fish in the sea. Red John may not have friends-just tools-but even Red John answers to Moriarty in the end. Sherlock has made the connection, and in disguise, and on the run he shows up in Sacramento determined to take Jane's life mission away. *

Chapter 4: Dr. Who-maybe…if I can figure out a way to make it work. The Doctor is hard to write…not for the faint of heart. And it would be the one time Jane did but didn't meet someone smarter than him because there's no way The Doctor could allow him to remember the encounter. You can't offer the chance to time travel to a man who would love to undo his past mistakes.

* If you are watching The Mentalist you need to be watching BBC's Sherlock. I love TM, but Sherlock blows American TV out of the water. Sorry…it does and I'm not even British so I'm not biased on this. Also, Elementary is a bad idea. No CBS, no!