Disclaimer: Naruto=Not Mine and all chapters are beta'd by me so please excuse any technical errors you may see. No matter how many times I look over it, some things just slip by you *sad face*

Warning: Future chapters may contain the following: Adult themes and content -Descriptive sex scenes, blood, rape, swearing and vulgarity. Also, moments of NaruSaku.

Genres: Comedy, Romance, Adventure, Drama, Angst, Suspense...and a shit lot more but I don't feel like writing it all out.

Chapter 1: Mortal Men

"So in other words, you think the physician was in the right to steal the king's daughter away?" Naruto crossed his arms and looked pointedly at his student.

Konohamaru grinned and slunk back in his chair with a nod.

"Alright," Naruto smiled and walked towards the board, "Give me three reasons."

The dark haired boy grumbled, "C'mon, Professor! We have five minutes before the class ends, do I have to? Can't we finish this discussion like, next class?"

Naruto's chalk squeaked against the board causing half the English Literature class to wince.

"Fine," the blonde professor grumbled in defeat, "Just remember, your research paper's on the Physician's Tale are due on my desk in two weeks!"

The class nodded in understanding before gathering their things and heading out towards the freedom of the hall. Three students stayed behind, waiting for Naruto to gather his things.

"Hey, Naruto," Konohamaru asked, "Are you going to stop by at grandpa's tonight?"

The blonde haired professor shook his head, "I wish I could," he sighed, "But I've got fifty papers to grade from my other Literature class and an exam to write for my graduate class."

Then looking at his stepbrother, Naruto grinned. "But what I can do is get you some free ramen from the staff lounge? You three in?"

Moegi and Udon nodded enthusiastically, knowing that the staff lounge had some of the choicest food in the whole University. The campus-dining hall wasn't much of a step up from cafeteria food at their previous high school, albeit it was a bit better.

Naruto chuckled as he watched the three file out of the room, then stuffing his class notes into his orange backpack, he proceeded on leaving the lecture hall with three sophomore college students tagging behind. The group walked out of the Health and Science building and made their way to the administrative office with Naruto swiping his identification badge thus getting them access within. He ushered the three of them inside before the security guard noticed any smuggling of unauthorized personnel and then stepped inside himself, making sure the door closed behind him.

"-I swear if I have one more phone go off in my class, I'm going to kick the little shits out!" Kiba growled as he wolfed down two meatballs. The brown haired Biology professor slurped up his sauce-covered noodles and chewed them with his mouth open.

Wrinkling her nose in disgust, Sakura handed the mutt a napkin, "Please, for my sake, Kiba…wipe your mouth."

"Hey, Sakura!" Naruto plopped down in a chair around the circular table, letting the three lucky students have free reign of the staff lounge, "How was class?"

The rosette sighed, "Terrible. Half the class wasn't listening to a word I said. The only time anyone would really pay attention was when I switched slides on the PowerPoint. Then, they'd just look over their packet, see if there were any blanks to fill and if there weren't they'd go back off staring into space!"

"Slides are boring," Konohamaru said disdainfully as he crossed his arms, "You can't expect to make people listen to you talk at slides for two hours."

"Brat," Sakura glared, "Who asked for your opinion? I can't teach anatomy any other way! Slides are a necessity!"

Moegi and Udon inched closer to their favorite blonde professor, knowing how Sakura could get in her moods.

"Chill out, Sakura," Kiba said. A piece of chewed noodle falling out of his wide-open mouth, "The kid has a valid point."

Without a single moment's hesitation, Sakura bashed Kiba's head straight into his plate of noodles. The poor Biology professor looked up, two meatball stains over his eyes, "Should have seen that one coming," he grumbled. However, not letting this spoil his lunch, he scooped up a couple of noodles with his hands and wiped the sauce from his eyes; then popped the mess into his mouth, earning himself a look of disgust from Moegi and Udon.

"What?" He said after noticing their perturbed glances.

"That's disgusting professor," Moegi mumbled.

Shrugging, Kiba forked a meatball, "No one told you to watch."

Suddenly the door to the staff lounge opened and in walked Sai, a paintbrush artfully tucked behind his ear, "Hey Dickless, Ugly, Ass face."

"Fuck you," three voices growled in unison.

Sai pointedly looked at Naruto and with an eerie smile answered, "Please do."

Flushing angrily, Naruto chucked Sakura's apple, which was mindlessly lying on the table, at the grinning freak. The rosette didn't even blink as her fruit hit the sleazy art instructor in the base of the neck.

"Sai, please stop harassing the other professors at the university," Neji called as he gracefully walked out of the salad bar and took an unoccupied seat next to the blonde professor, "And Naruto, how many times have I told you that students aren't allowed in the staff lounge?"

Naruto shrugged his shoulders, not really reading too much into what the other was saying, "Probably over a hundred."

"Then why, might I inquire, are the three of them doing in here?"

"Ramen!" Konohamaru answered from a few feet away as he stuck his thumb out and grinned foolishly.

The Hyuga shook his head, "Make it quick then. Sasuke's break starts in ten minutes. If he sees these three, he won't hesitate on reporting them."

Naruto rolled his eyes, "Yeah, I know. I've made it a necessity to learn his schedule by heart so I could avoid that frigid bastard like the plague."

"What frigid bastard?"

Naruto froze; then very slowly, turned his head to the right.

In the doorway stood Sasuke Uchiha, arms crossed over his chest and a displeased look marring his features.

"W-what are you doing here?" Naruto sputtered, unwarranted anger bubbling to the surface, "You're still supposed to be teaching!"

"What are they doing here?" Sasuke spoke icily as he looked pointedly at the three sophomore students.

The sound of the Calculus professor's voice had Konohamaru, Moegi and Udon rushing into the food bar, grabbing their free ramen and running out of the lounge before Naruto could stammer out an excuse.

"Dobe," the Uchiha grit out as he leisurely walked to the juice bar and grabbed himself an apple juice before taking a seat across from the English professor.

Before another word could be said between the two, Kiba pulled out his cell phone and sent a mass text to all his fellow co-workers.

Quick!

Staff lounge!

Sasuke and Naruto in same room!

Sakura scooted closer to Kiba, trying to get as far away from the soul-crushing aura surrounding the two Konoha professors. Kiba, wincing, took a sip of his coke and moved Sakura's head out of his viewing range. Bothersome woman had such a large head.

He wanted to see all.

Meanwhile Sai quietly took a seat beside Neji, trying not to make any sudden movements. If none of them interfered, things were bound to get…physical. He leered, oh how he loved those two idiots.

All at once, three people ran into the staff lounge.

"Good," Ino let out a breath, "It didn't start yet," she chucked her History textbook on the floor and took a seat on the sofa. Shikamaru was right behind her, both eyes wide open.

He wasn't going to miss anything this epic.

Gaara however, stayed by the doorway. Green eyes taking in anything and everything within the room that could possibly serve as a hazard.

Kiba's noodles, now that would have to be moved immediately along with Sasuke's bottle of juice –and Sakura's handbag for that matter. Eyes narrowed when he spotted single strands of ramen lying dangerously on the tiled floor.

The ebony door hit against the wall forcefully as Choji ran into the staff room, bumping Gaara ever so slightly with his pudgy arm. Behind him were Hinata and Shino. The Entomologist fixed his tinted glasses and took up residence right next to Gaara.

"I'm going to have to report them," Sasuke stated, eyebrows angled downwards in an annoyed manner, "I've let it off for far too long."

"I let them in," Naruto grit his teeth as his hands already fisted by his sides, "They weren't breaking any rules if I let them in myself!"

"Hn,"

"What, bastard?" The blonde scoffed, "Can't find the right words to express yourself with?"

The Uchiha narrowed his eyes further, "Quite the contrary. I don't think you deserve to hear anything worth saying."

In unison, everyone took a baited breath.

Sakura leaned farther away from the two as the animosity increased tenth fold.

"Oh really?" Naruto glared, "You think words are too good for me?"

"Hn."

"Bastard!" Naruto stood angrily, toppling over his chair in the process. The Uchiha stood as well, pupils dilating by the second.

Kiba absentmindedly stuck his tongue out as he angled the phone just right so he could get great footage when the two threw themselves at one another. He chuckled to himself, wondering if he should put this up on youtube once it's over.

Then again, maybe not.

He didn't want the idiots losing their jobs over something as stupid as this.

At that precise moment, Rock Lee darted into the staff room, his bushy eyebrows rising into his hairline as he spotted the aforementioned duo. Turning his head towards Gaara he mouthed, 'did I miss anything?' The red haired English professor shook his head.

Then sighing in relief, the usually enthusiastic speech professor silently grabbed a seat by the juice bar.

"You are a selfish, arrogant, highly hypocritical, good for nothing son of a bitch!" Naruto spat, his anger straining against the fraying leash his conscious had on it.

"You are an idiotic dumb ass who is annoying as hell! Not to mention a nosy blonde loud mouth with no talent!" Sasuke fired.

"Say that again you prick!" Naruto shouted causing the vein on his forehead to throb dangerously.

"You are an idiotic dumb ass-"

"THAT'S IT!"

Throwing himself over the round table, Naruto attacked the Uchiha in a fit of rage.

Kiba hit the record button.

:::

Kakashi tried to keep both eyes on the speaker, but it was proving to be a very hard thing to do. The man's voice was so dull and monotone that half the occupants in the room were battling off the sleep. Blinking sluggishly he watched as the speaker pointed to a diagram on the brightly displayed PowerPoint.

Yes, another plummet in the Graduate department.

Was it his fault?

No.

So, why the hell was he here?

Tsunade and her sake had done it again.

The phone in his pocket began to vibrate causing the silver haired man to sigh. Then reaching into his pants he pulled the portable device out, flipping it open.

Once he had opened the message from Kiba, Kakashi's eyebrows rose indefinitely into his hairline. All he could do was stare at the digital display.

Naruto and Sasuke were rolling on the floor of the staff lounge beating the crap out of each other. He chuckled to himself as Uzumaki was flipped on his back by the Uchiha who then proceeded to straddle the younger man's waist. Naruto's fist came out of nowhere colliding with the raven's smooth skinned jaw. The Sasuke's head snapped to the side thus letting the blonde regain his footing. With what Kakashi could only presume was a yell calling Sasuke a choice couple of words, Naruto jumped on the raven's back and pushed him into the salad bar. Sasuke's face landed in the assortment of diced lettuce. Fueled further by the anger of letting the blonde best him, even for a short lived period, Sasuke bucked his hips causing Naruto's head to hit the metal bar over the lettuce, thus resulting in the blonde loosening his hold. The Uchiha took this opportunity to grab Naruto's left leg and hurl him head first into the large steaming bowl of spaghetti and meatballs.

Kakashi saw Sakura turn to face the camera and wave. She made a peace sign with her fingers (which he thought was hilarious) and smiled. With his ebony mask pressing firmly against the lower portion of his face, the chuckle that erupted from his mouth was somewhat muffled. Two people turned to look at him, but Kakashi took no notice. His time was being better spent watching the two Math and English professor fight it out, battle royale style.

For two genius men, they were sure stupid when it came to matters concerning themselves. Kakashi sighed as a memory played out in his mind.

'Welcome to Konoha University,' Jiraiya said, 'My name is Jiraiya Sanin and I am head of the English Department. To my left is Kakashi Hatake, head of Math and Physics and to my right is Orochimaru Sainin, no we're not related the last name is spelled differently. He is head of the Chemistry Department.' A few hands dropped. 'We're here to help you get familiar with the campus and answer any questions you might have concerning your teaching career here at Konoha University.'

Everyone in the room nodded. Not everyone was a first year teacher, however the Dean of the University had made it mandatory for every professor to attend these meetings and get acquainted/reacquainted with the teachers. Kakashi leaned against the back of his chair while Orochimaru sat with his back straight and eyes hungrily looking over the crowd.

'Now, before we start,' Jiraiya continued, 'I would like to introduce two very special people who will be joining us this year. Please welcome Sasuke Uchiha and Naruto Uzumaki!'

Everyone clapped politely as they watched the two mentioned professors make their way to the front.

Kakashi's eyes widened as he saw his former high school students stand next to Jiraiya. He rubbed his eyes just to make sure this wasn't some trick of the light. Nope, there they were, Sasuke, Naruto and the crackling soul-stealing aura that followed the two wherever they went. The silver haired man slumped farther into his chair.

This was going to be one heck of a get together.

He looked into the crowd and just as he had assumed, there sat Sakura and Ino in the front along with a few other familiar faces. Kakashi recognized Kiba, Shikamaru and Choji instantaneously.

'Sasuke Uchiha graduated from Sunna University with a Ph D in Mathematics and it is our great pleasure to welcome him to our humble university. Naruto Uzumaki, graduate of Hokage University has a Ph D in English and has been published in many books and journals. It is an honor to have these fine men come here and share their knowledge with our students. In honor of their wondrous achievements I would like the two of you,' he looked at Sasuke and Naruto, 'To start off the greeting ceremony. You two shall be paired up, by the end of the hour we will gather in a circle and hear what everyone has to say about the person they have been paired with.'

Kakashi had to remind himself to breathe. How many years had it been since his senior class had graduated…five, six years? How the hell did those two become Ph Ds so fast?

Never mind, he didn't want to know. His black eyes followed the two men as they walked off the stage. Were they…no. They were grownups now. They wouldn't.

Half hour later

'I'll wipe that smirk off your arrogant face, you fucking bastard!' Naruto yelled, his hands already fisted in the dark locks of hair.

'I'd like to see you try, moron!' Sasuke fired back as he flipped Naruto over onto his back and straddled the struggling blonde.

Sai walked over to stand by Kakashi, his paintbrush tucked behind his ear, 'I have a suspicious feeling that the cute one is gay.'

Kakashi narrowed his eyes at the sickening grin plastered on the pale professor's face, 'They're taken.'

'Oh?' Sai smirked, 'And by whom may I ask?'

'Why Sai,' the silver haired man smiled down at the art instructor, 'I thought it was obvious.'

'Enlighten me.'

'By each other of course.'

Sai closed his eyes and smiled up at his superior, 'For how long have they been together?'

'I think the better question would be, how long have they not.'

'That long eh?' Sai turned his attention to the battling duo, 'They don't seem to like each other very much.'

'It would seem that way, wouldn't it?'

'Naruto you promised not to fight!' Sakura yelled from a few feet away, her arms flailing in the air above her head.

'S-sorry S-Sa-Sakura,' Naruto grappled with the raven, 'But he's j-just a f-fucking c-cocky bastard!'

Sasuke shoved the blonde and grabbed a fistful of golden hair, 'Why are you fucking following me?'

'I'M NOT FOLLOWING YOU! QUIT FOLLOWING ME!'

Shikamaru stood by the sideline staring at his two friends fight.

How many times has this happened?

He'd lost count.

'Get the fuck off me, you cocksucker!' Naruto snarled as he kicked at Sasuke's arm.

'You're one to talk, you little dipshit!'

'Fuck off!'

'Go to hell!'

'You first!'

Ah, young love.

It sucked.

:::

After fifteen minutes or so, Choji decided it was time to stop the fight. He had a class to teach in twenty minutes and he had yet to pacify the growling in his stomach.

Food was important damn it, and the two shit heads were throwing it all around!

"Okay, I've had enough."

Grabbing Naruto's leg and Sasuke's arm, Choji flung the two men in opposite directions. Shino and Gaara grabbed Naruto before the hot-blooded blonde could get up and attack the Uchiha while Kankuro and Lee did the same with Sasuke, holding him firmly enough so that the Uchiha couldn't break free and tackle the panting blonde.

Roughly five minutes later, their tempers had cooled to a degree and their captors thought it all right to let them go.

Then deeming it safe to resume daily life, everyone gathered around the table with their lunches. Choji had gotten himself a heaping of the spaghetti and noodles along with some mashed potatoes and beef patties, not caring whether he might find a piece of the Sasuke or Naruto in his cuisine.

Ino and Sakura eyed the food in Choji's plate wearily.

"You know, Choji," Ino started reprimanding her boyfriend, "Cholesterol clogs arteries and leads to strokes, even death. Tell him, Sakura."

The rosette nodded, "It's true."

Choji gave the girls an un amused look before glancing into their plates, "Then it's a good thing you're eating salad. Good for you."

Sakura and Ino shook their heads in defeat.

It was pointless.

They just had to depend of Ino shoving oatmeal down Choji's gullet for the rest of his life.

As the sound of chewing filled the room, Tenten walked into the lounge. And upon seeing people sitting at the table groaned loudly, "Damn, I missed it?"

The crowd nodded. Naruto and Sasuke threw the girl murderous looks as they nursed their cuts and bruises with the large ice packs given to them by Hinata. The brown haired girl sighed and took a seat beside Neji and Temari, "Someone should really consider drugging their food next time," she whispered.

"Why would we do something like that?" Kiba asked, his eavesdropping earning him a glare from Shikamaru's girlfriend.

"So they could just have sex already and stop breaking things and leaving food inedible for the rest of us! I'm tired of packing my own lunch!" Tenten growled as she deposited her bento on the table and looked sadly at the poorly shaped onigiri.

"Well then go get yourself some food from the student's dining hall," Kiba offered.

"Yeah," the philosophy professor scoffed, "So that I can have diarrhea for the rest of the day? I think not."

"Then you should have gotten here earlier," Kiba growled, not liking how his helpful suggestions kept getting shot down.

"Not to be rude," Neji interceded, "But some classes can't be let out twenty minutes before they end. We can't all hand out little packets and say 'study this and the things marked in yellow will be on the test!' It doesn't work like that."

"Not my fault you picked such an ass dry subject," Kiba grumbled.

"Organic chemistry is not ass dry," Neji grit his teeth, "It uses critical thinking which involves the use of one's brain, something I know you have no affinity for."

"Fuck off, Hyuga."

"That's what I thought," Neji smirked, "Little intelligence equals pathetic comeback."

"Oh yeah?" Kiba fisted the plastic fork in his hand, "How about you come off your mighty horse and take it out with me like a real man!"

Neji rolled his eyes, "Proved my point to a T."

Kiba was about to throw his plastic utensil at the pompous man when Sakura grabbed his arm in her ironclad fist, "Knock it off."

The tone of her voice had Kiba swallowing thickly.

Sakura was scary sometimes.

Like right now with the way her devil eyes were staring at him.

Pure evil.

Kiba shuddered.

Naruto wiped the blood from his lip and cursed, throwing the Uchiha a death glare. The raven rolled his eyes and iced his bruising arm daintily, not even bothering with words.

"Hey, Dicky," Sai took a seat next to Naruto, a box of bandages in his lap, "Let me fix you up."

Naruto groaned as he turned his head and looked into the smiling face of the art instructor. Hissing like a viper when Sai rubbed a cotton ball slick with alcohol against the corner of his mouth.

"Don't be such a baby, Dickless," Sai gently washed the cut, "It is very unbecoming in a boyfriend."

"Stop being an ass," Naruto smiled, knowing the other was trying to uplift his mood, then winced at the pain smiling provided, "Ow."

"Stop smiling," Sai brushed his fingers over Naruto's forehead, "It will give you mouth wrinkles. Then your fuckable status will drop."

"You're a weird one Sai," Naruto rolled his eyes before focusing on his 'nurse', "But I guess to each his own, right?"

Sai smiled eerily causing Naruto to internally shiver.

"Pst," Ino poked Sakura's rib as she gazed at the scene before her, "Look over there."

Sakura turned her head in the direction Ino's eyes were trained. The frown on her face quickly morphed into a grin. Poking Kiba, she motioned for him to take a look. Which he did, then grinned and in turn poked Hinata, who poked Shino. All the way down the table until everyone was staring at the three professors sitting on the long couch.

Sasuke was glaring daggers at the black haired boy who was caringly tending to Naruto's cuts and bruises. The blonde was solely focused on Sai, therefore didn't notice the tightening of the Uchiha's fist. Sai, on the other hand, had a good clear view of the frothing raven. He blinked and leaned closer to the blonde as he pulled Naruto's arm out of its sleeve.

Kiba snickered, "Man, this is really retarded."

"Sai is going to get it," Choji said between bites, "Big time."

"No he won't," Gaara spoke slowly, his voice deep and far away sounding as he lowered his fork.

"You're right," Neji agreed after wiping his mouth with a napkin, "Sasuke doesn't even know why it bothers him."

"Ph D sure doesn't mean much then," Shino stated boldly, "If you can't see what's right in front of your face."

The group of friends nodded.

"Troublesome really," Shikamaru looked at his watch, "Damn." Lazily, the psychologist stood from his seat at the table. With a look of longing his shoulders slumped as his eyes took in the recliner in the corner. Mind already imagining all the sleep he could have caught up on had he not had to teach a Psychology class in five minutes.

"Did Kakashi respond to the video?" Sakura asked once Shikamaru and a few others had left.

Kiba nodded, pulling out his phone to check for a response.

Sakura peered over her friend's shoulder to get a better look.

There was an animation.

Kiba hit the play button and the two watched as a slender finger went in and out of circle made by holding the thumb and index fingers at the tip. Sakura rolled her eyes as Kiba burst out into fits of laughter.

"Where does he get these things from?" She asked with an eye roll, "Perverts United?"

"Genma."

"Oh," Sakura tilted her head, an image of the computer graphics professor flashing through her head, "Figures."

:::

Naruto nursed his lip as he walked towards his next class. Two more hours until he got to go back to the apartment he shared with Kiba and Shikamaru. His thoughts aimlessly travelled back to the raven haired bastard. The blonde furrowed his eyebrows in displeasure.

Yet again had his ass been kicked, although the fucking Uchiha didn't get away unscathed either. How he hated that fucker. Stupid piss ass always managed to screw things up for him. What the fuck was his damn problem?

And his so called 'friends'…ugh what were Sasuke and he to them? Free entertainment? Sometimes, he honestly wondered if the group of professors at Konoha University, gathered together and planned ways to get him and the fucking Uchiha in the same room so they could watch them beat the shit out of each other. It wasn't damn fair!

He got here first!

Why did the bastard have to come here out of all the other places? He sighed as he turned the corner, eyes glancing up at the ceiling. Someone must really have it out for me up there.

:::

Sasuke was sitting in his office grading a stack of Calculus midterms when there was a knock on his door. Not being in a particularly helpful mood today, he didn't want to be bothered by the dumbass students he had no doubt were lining up outside his office to beg for extra points after the exam. He grit his teeth, rubbing his temples after marking another y=mx+b problem incorrect. If one more student got this damn y=mx+b crap wrong one more time, he was going to consider committing murder.

It was the easiest concept, really.

Sasuke couldn't understand how one could mess up such a simple equation! He glanced at the pile of graded papers, eyes narrowing into reptilian slits…apparently many people. With murder on his mind, Sasuke stood from his seat and walked towards the door. When he opened it, he was surprised to see Neji Hyuga standing in hallway.

"What do you want?"

Neji took Sasuke's words as an invitation to enter. Walking into the office, he took a seat in front of the wooden desk and folded his hands in his lap. Rolling his eyes, Sasuke sighed and closed the door. He returned to his seat, face devoid of any emotion as he waited for the grey eyed man to speak.

"You…seemed upset today," Neji finally said.

Sasuke growled, "Could be attributed to the many cuts and bruises I obtained from that moronic dobe."

"Hm," Neji nodded before leaning closer and lightening his tone to a degree, "Sai seemed very interested in your moronic dobe."

"So?" Sasuke shrugged, not quite understanding what exactly Neji wanted from him, "What difference does it make?"

"I wonder," Neji tried to control the smirk that was dying to show itself upon his face, "Do you think Naruto likes Sai?"

That instantly had a visible affect on Sasuke, causing Neji's eyes to mask with knowledge.

The Uchiha narrowed his eyes, "No."

"Oh?" Neji hummed, looking Sasuke in the eye, "Why is that?"

"The dobe wouldn't have pulled away from him if he did."

"How observant of you," Neji finally let his smirk shine through.

"Not really, "Sasuke scoffed, "The little idiot kind of screamed 'stop molesting me you pervert' quite loudly."

"Yes," Neji nodded, then pressed harder, "But did you see how Sai was touching him?"

Sasuke growled, not really appreciated being led on a leash in this fashion, "What do you want Neji?" He finally asked.

"I think Sai is in love with Naruto."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow, "And I care because?"

"Well, as my friend you should know about my feelings," Neji prodded further, intent on making the Uchiha uncomfortable.

"You like Naruto?" Sasuke's eyes widened, "Aren't you straight?"

Neji shrugged his shoulders, lying coming to him as naturally as breathing. "I guess not. I can't stop thinking about him. Every time I'm alone…I see his face."

Sasuke's eyes hardened, "You're lying."

"Why would I lie?"

Thinking for a minute, Sasuke frowned, unable to discern a plausible reason for Neji to deceive him. "…I don't know, but I know you're lying."

"Take it as you will," Neji said finally, letting not a shred of what he was really thinking shine through. "But I indeed am very interested in the blonde. So, as my friend I will ask you to refrain from pummeling the man every time you see him. When I see you two rolling around on the floor it makes me angry. I don't want anyone touching him other than myself."

Sasuke's eyes widened slightly, "You're serious?"

"Dead serious."

"Alright," Leaning back a little in his chair, Sasuke attempted to absorb everything that had just taken place in his office."I'll try not to engage in violence with the do –Naruto, for your sake."

"Thank you."

Neji stood from his seat and bowed his head, "I'll see you tomorrow then."

Sasuke nodded, watching as the Hyuga walked out of his office.

Neji liked his dobe…Neji liked Naruto. He glanced at the pile of ungraded papers and sighed. He was a good and loyal friend and it didn't matter that he could be cold and uncaring at times. His friends were important to him and at times he considered them as close as family.

Neji had respectfully asked him to lay off, so he would. However, what he didn't know was why this all made him feel incredibly…unhappy.

:::

Shikamaru glanced at the man coming out of the large brick building. Slowly, he pushed himself off the tree he was leaning against and waited for the longhaired professor to reach him.

"Did you get my malt balls?" Shikamaru asked.

"Affirmative."

"Hm," Shikamaru looked up at the sky, "Are the malt balls a go?"

"For the time being."

"Good."

So there's the first chapter. Let me know what you think of this story!

Now, a word from our guest of the day: KIBA!

"Hey fuckers! Guess what? Sasuke's an ass wipe, don't you agree? He always pushes Naruto around and shit and that's really fucking annoying. Still, when they're going at it, it's great to watch! Sakura broke my phone, the little bitch so now I have to go buy another one." Kiba looks at the smashed phone lying on the ground and curses colorfully.

"Also this damn author keeps harassing me," Kiba looks up at the sky, "Fucking nut job keeps asking me to tell you to review? Review what? Seriously, mental this one. Leave a review so she could stop bothering me alright?"

And that's Kiba everyone!

What do our friends have up their sleeve, hm? And what's with the malt balls?

See you all hopefully soon!

Review = ME HAPPY!

-Smartcat