A/N: I can't decide if this is a parody or just complete and utter stupidity. So read it and laugh – I hope. Otherwise I would feel bad for making you waste your time.

If you want the next four raps (Beckendorf's, Katie's, Grover's and Annabeth's) tell me in a review. I have no idea if I plan on continuing this, but if people like it, then I definitely will, so let me know!

It was the first week of Camp, and everyone was prepared for battle at every moment, even though Percy's birthday was two months away.

The camp fire was quiet. No one felt like speaking, because no one wanted to talk about the issue at hand.

Luke. Kronos. Their impending doom. Broken nails.

You know. All the normal worries for teenagers.

Silena was sitting next to Beckendorf, the two of them canoodling as usual.

Annabeth was sitting next to Percy, the two of them arguing as usual.

"Oh, I could so beat you!" said Annabeth with a laugh. It was a startling noise in the quiet. People turned to look at the two of them, and Annabeth blushed lightly. "Sorry," she said, laughing.

"What's so funny?" asked Connor Stoll.

"Yeah," said his brother Travis, "We could all use a laugh these days."

The whole came turned to look at Percy and Annabeth, who fidgeted. Chiron said, "Well, what is it?"

"Percy thinks he could beat me in a rap battle."

"Oh hell no," said Connor, "No way."

"Percy would so win!" said Travis.

"Bet on it?"

"Twenty bucks and next week's chores?"

"Deal."

"You two," said Travis, "Rap battle. Now."

Percy and Annabeth turned to each other, "What?"

"We bet on it," said Connor, the whole camp staring at him, "You two have to do it. Rap battle. Proceed."

"I want in," said Beckendorf.

"The bet?" said Connor, "Sure, I'd love to take your money."

"No, you idiot," said Beckendorf, laughing, "The rap battle. You in, Silena?"

"Oh, no," said Silena, shaking her head, "The only thing I rap is presents."

The camp burst into laughter. Silena rarely joked, but when she did it was always funny.

"Okay then," said Chiron, "Does anyone else want to give it a try?" A few hands went up. "Okay then," said the centaur, "Stand in a line and we'll begin with Percy."

There weren't too many people in the line. Percy, Annabeth, Beckendorf, Katie Gardner, and Grover were prepared to battle.

The Camp filed into the pavilion, where the rappers would perform. All non-performers sat in the audience, and Chiron appeared on stage first.

"Okay, everyone, are you ready?"

The crowd cheered.

"Each camper will get the same beat. They will get thirty seconds to rap, and then they will be cut off. After this we will choose the top three rappers, who will then battle freestyle against each other. First up – Percy Jackson!"

The crowd cheered and the beat began.

"Yo my name is Percy,

And I'm Jacked, son,

And I'm in a prophecy,

Hell yeah I'm the one,

I'ma die super soon,

Or live super long,

I'm here to beat Annabeth,

Who is totally wrong,

I took down a Minotaur,

Before I was a teen,

And I owned the empousa,

That bitch was so mean,

I'm not the smartest guy,

In this whole world,

But I can hold my breath underwater,

Can you say that, girl?

You may be a Wise Girl,

But I've got a brain,

And I beat you in that spar,

What now? Oh you're lame,

I'm awesome with a sword,

And I'm cooler than you,

Hey look I'm gonna win,

Annabeth, you'll lose!"

The audience laughed and clapped as he rapped, and Annabeth looked positively murderous. She would get her revenge though. She had some things in mind. And they were good. It was a good thing she decided to do this, because she would be humiliated if Percy had the last word.

She wasn't up next. But she'd be up there tearing Percy down quite soon.

He'd regret the day he challenged her.

A/N2: My mother said the "the only thing I rap is presents" earlier today during present opening. Merry Christmas (or Crissmas for those Starkids out there!)