Sweet Gestures

Chapter 12

The first time they had sex together, a year ago Christmas Eve, had been exactly that: sex. It was an act borne of pent-up frustration, loneliness, a certain amount of booze and, Jethro eventually admitted to himself, a sizeable chunk of long-denied lust.

Okay, it had something to do with love, too.

Jethro'd had feelings for Tony for quite some time, although he swore he had never given any hint of those feelings, much less acted upon them. And he never would have made a move on Tony under normal circumstances. Not that there was much about their job that the average Joe would consider normal. Dealing daily with the injuries and death of both anonymous victims and their own people, extreme emotional highs and lows, stress, and failures tempered by the successes that kept them plugging along year after year, was their way of life.

But last year at this time, a succession of hard cases and the usual holiday blues, coupled with Tony turning up at Gibbs' door in an unusually fragile emotional state, had all conspired to set the ball in motion. Tony had stood there in the middle of the basement, leaning against the ribs of the latest boat, downing his second jar of bourbon and laughing in that brittle way he had when things were about to crash down about his ears.

Tony had shaken his head and said, "Shit, we are a couple of the sorriest men I've ever known, alone in your basement drinking booze that tastes of rusty nails, with no family in sight." He took in a ragged breath and muttered under his breath in a shaky voice, "Oh God, I'm a mess. Have to go." And then his face crumpled and somehow he was in Jethro's arms and his face was buried in his neck.

Tony's hands were under his boss's shirt then undoing his sensible Sears belt with hands made clumsy by a desperate kind of want, and without ever sharing a kiss they ended up half-naked, jerking each other off and coming all over their hands and clothes, breathing hard with Jethro holding Tony upright because he had seemed so week-kneed and drained that Jethro was afraid he was going to pass out on the basement floor. Then there was a long stretch of embarrassed silence but Tony, who refused to meet Jethro's eyes, clung to him and didn't make any move to leave.

So Jethro offered Tony a somewhat clean rag and looked the other way to give the younger man time to clean himself off and get his act together. He'd planned to show Tony the door and to pretend to forget what had happened but after a look at Tony's face, all guilt-ridden and scared of something - surely he wasn't scared of Gibbs - he didn't do anything so stupid as to push him out. Because Jethro was still consumed with need, and pretty much acting out of self-interest at that point, he pulled Tony upstairs with him. He had then stripped a too-compliant Tony of his clothes and washed him down properly, and took him to bed where they held each other in silence. It was only when dawn was breaking did they finally get a little sleep.

The next morning was awkward and sort of weird being that it was Christmas morning and there was no evidence of it being a holiday in Gibbs' home, except for a few cards on the mantle and a Christmas cake from Jackson sitting half-eaten in a tin on the kitchen counter. After handing Tony a cup of coffee and a bagel, Jethro decided to send Tony home, but somehow they ended up eating omelets and hash browns and drinking huge cups of coffee sitting across from each other at the kitchen table. Tony still wouldn't meet his eyes for more than a couple of seconds but he ate everything that was put in front of him.

By the time Tony was pulling on his boots by the front door, and offering Jethro a too-polite thank-you (though it wasn't clear if it was for the sex or for the breakfast), Jethro knew for certain he just couldn't let him go. That was when they finally kissed, a first for both of them it turned out. It wasn't great as far as technique went, tentative and exploratory, but their second kiss was far better and, as they say, the rest was history.

It was their second Christmas morning together and Tony, like a kid, was eager to get downstairs so they could open their gifts. He was torn between being excited about seeing Jethro's reaction when he opened up his present, and worried that he'd think it was too much. One thing for sure, Jethro wasn't the kind of guy to go overboard with gift giving, even if he was generous to Tony in other ways.

By the time Gibbs was out of the shower, Tony was already dressed and in the guest bedroom, finishing up packing for the trip. When Tony had moved in seven months ago, the two men had quickly come to the conclusion that there wasn't enough room in the master bedroom closet to accommodate Jethro's as well as Tony's clothes. So now Tony used the spare room closet for his out-of-season and lesser-used clothing.

Jethro was content to stand in the open doorway with a cup of coffee in hand, and admire Tony's rear end, while the younger man bent over to zip up his bag. Tony picked up his suitcase and turned. Seeing Jethro standing there with a smirk on his face, he smiled in response. Bumping their hips together, Tony slid his free hand behind Jethro's neck and pulled him closer for a sweet good morning kiss. "Merry Christmas," he murmured against Jethro's lips.

"Mmm, and Merry Christmas to you, too," Jethro responded, unable to recall when he'd last felt so content and relaxed. "C'mon, we have a big day ahead of us."

Tony raised his eyebrows, hopeful. "Gifts or breakfast?"

Knowing that breakfast would be rushed and only half eaten if opening the gifts was postponed, Jethro agreed, "Gifts."

"Packed?"

"Almost. I'll finish later."

Suitcase in hand, Tony bounded downstairs ahead of Jethro, who followed at a more sedate pace shaking his head.

Tony handed Gibbs his wrapped gift almost reverently, and then hesitantly retrieved his own from under the Christmas tree. Tony looked at the wrapping paper with interest. "This is perfect. I love the funnies."

"You gonna open it or just read the comics, Tony?"

"Are you going to open yours first?" Suddenly Tony seemed nervous. "If you don't like it we can change it. Or I can get you something else…or…"

Shit, thought Gibbs, he bought me something expensive. He loved that Tony thought enough of him to put so much trouble and thought into everything he gave him, but Jethro had always been embarrassed to be on the receiving end of gifts, especially if they cost more than twenty bucks. Maybe it came from growing up watching every penny. "Maybe," Jethro suggested, "we should open them at the same time."

Tony scrunched up his face. "No, I want to watch you."

Jethro took hold of Tony's free hand and drew him close. "Tony, no matter what you got me, you know I'll love it." Tony started to speak but Jethro stopped him with a look of warning. "Now I know I'm an old grouch…"

"No, Jethro…"

"C'mon, let's not lie about it. We both know that's the way I am, especially at work. But when we get home, when we're here together and it's you and me, only us…it's different, And this past year, being with you? It hasn't been anything like I expected. I guess I thought it'd be an extension of our work life, but it's been so much better. Since you've been in my life, been my partner, I've never been happier. I just want you to know that."

Tony ducked his head and shifted his weight. "Damn it, you're going to make me cry, you old grouch."

Jethro pulled Tony into his arms and kissed his cheek. "I love you, Tony, and if you don't open your gift soon we'll have to leave it under the tree until we come back. We need to have breakfast and get a move on. I have a couple of things I need to do before we leave."

"I love you, Jethro."

"I know. You show me every day. Here, I'll go first." Jethro released Tony and unwrapped his gift. The shiny red paper fell away to reveal a black jeweler's box. Hesitantly he opened the lid and revealed a beautiful black watch with a pale gold inset, with numbers large enough that even he could read them. "Tony…" It was too much. He didn't know what to say and like an idiot he just stood there staring at it for a little too long.

Tony's hand reached out and tried to take the gift back. "You don't like it. I knew it was too much," he said, his voice tight as he echoed Jethro's thoughts.

Tony was shaking his head in self-condemnation but Jethro held onto his gift and placed his large hand over Tony's. "Hey, I love it. I do."

"No, I can tell I overdid it. I don't want you to feel compelled, Jethro…"

"I love it. I want to keep it, Tony."

"No you don't."

"Hey, you ever know me to do something I don't want to do, Tony?"

"Yeah."

In disbelief, Jethro asked, "When?"

Tony met his eyes and a corner of his mouth twitched. "When I got you to try out that vibrating plug-."

Red-faced, Jethro quickly said, "Yeah, well, there were extenuating circumstances." He sighed. "Tell me about my new watch, Tony. Like if it cost more than this house."

Tony shrugged and said cautiously, "I took out insurance on it but don't leave it lying around any hotel room." He saw that Jethro had taken the watch out of its box and was already putting it on, so Tony helped him with the catch, even though the older man didn't really need any help. He explained, "It's a Louis Vuitton yachtsman's watch with a steel case covered in vulcanized rubber. That makes it almost indestructible. See this, it shows military time, and it comes with another watchband…"

Tony continued talking but Jethro wasn't listening any more. He had a tight feeling in his chest that, if he hadn't been in love, he might mistake for symptoms of a weak heart. Eventually Tony stopped extolling the virtues of the watch, whose best feature was simply that Jethro could read it without putting on his glasses. "Your turn," Jethro said with a fond smile.

Tony had some trouble undoing the knots that Gibbs had tied around the newspaper-wrapped gift. In the end he had to pull out his knife to slice through the string that was holding his present hostage. "Phew, remind me not to get into rope bondage with you, Jethro," Tony said, half-seriously. Then the gift wrap was discarded and a box similar to the one that had encased Jethro's watch was revealed. Despite his earlier haste, Tony took his time opening it. When he did, his eyes widened and he whispered in awe, "Magnum." His voice was louder when he exclaimed, "You found a Magnum watch, a Rolex GMT Master! Jethro…I don't know what to say."

Jethro bit back his instinctive 'that's a first' and instead simply offered a heartfelt, "Happy Anniversary and Merry Christmas, baby."

Tony hugged him so hard Jethro just about had the breath squeezed out of him. He was kissed and released and Tony started to tell him about the line of watches by Rolex. "Rolex made these special watches for PanAm the 50s that showed two time zones simultaneously, and they colored it red and blue and that's why they call it the Pepsi bezel and Tom Selleck wore his in Magnum and it's…it's just what I wanted. I love it!" He hugged Jethro again and was still talking about the watch and Magnum as he was guided into the kitchen for breakfast.

Tony knew that the watch was from the 50s and that Jethro had spent a lot, possibly a couple of grand on it. He'd spent too much on his gift for his partner, too, but it was a special occasion and something he really wanted to do. To Tony, being part of a solid, loving, long-term - forever - relationship was worth more than any gift, more than any amount of money. It was priceless and he valued it, and Jethro as well, more than anything, even his own life. Although Tony was sometimes consumed with self-doubt (though less now than ever before in his life,) he knew without any reservation that what he and Jethro had was a rich, rewarding, and complete relationship that defied all reason. But one thing for sure, he wasn't about to question it.

"Jethro, I…uh…I have to make a call. Do I have time?"

Jethro didn't ask who it was that Tony felt compelled to call on Christmas morning. "Sure, we're leaving in twenty minutes. Roads are clear and the flight's on time." Jethro went upstairs to finish packing and left Tony to make his call.

Gibbs peered into the living room. All things considered, he wasn't really very surprised to see Tony slumped in the easy chair by the phone. He went over and sat in front of him on the coffee table and took both of his hands in his own. "Hey." Tony didn't meet his eyes. "Hey," Gibbs said again, softly. "Was he there?"

Tony tilted his head to one side and shrugged. "Yeah."

This was like pulling nails. Gibbs tried not to let his anger show. "You talk to him?"

Tony picked at the seam of his jeans. "Yeah."

Gibbs didn't ask anything else and eventually Tony looked up and met his eyes. Cursing inwardly at the man who seemed to have a knack for putting a world of hurt in Tony's eyes, Gibbs stood and pulled Tony up, into his arms. Tony buried his face in Jethro's neck and let out a ragged sigh. Jethro supported Tony as best he could, in the only way he knew how, showing his love with his tender embrace. They stood like that for several minutes and then Gibbs gently urged Tony to sit back down.

He picked up the phone, Tony immediately and loudly protesting, but Gibbs hushed him. "I'm not calling him, Tony." He dialed a number and then said, "Merry Christmas. Yeah, we're leaving shortly but before we go we wanted to wish you a good holiday. Uhuh. Yeah. I know, Dad. Here he is. Thanks, Dad." Jethro handed the phone to Tony. "He wants to say something to you."

For a second Tony almost refused to speak to Jackson Gibbs, not feeling like talking to anyone, but he relented. Within thirty seconds Tony was smiling and a minute later he was laughing. When they'd finished the call and disconnected, Tony said, "He'd like us to visit in a couple of months. Think we can do that?"

"I think we can wrangle a long weekend." He kissed the side of Tony's head and then slapped him on the rear. "C'mon, cowboy. Time to go." Gibbs looked around. "Where's the other bag?"

"What bag?"

"The one with our beach stuff in it."

"Uh, you left it on the bed."

Gibbs sighed and ran upstairs, feeling a vague ache in his still-bruised thigh. He hoped a week of swimming and lying around would cure it but he had a strong feeling he was going to get a workout every night from his partner.

Tony stood in the front hall, two packed bags at his feet, fielding a last-minute call from Abby on his cell. "Hey Abbs. You have a great Christmas, too, and we'll see you in the New Year."

From upstairs came a bellow. "DiNozzo!"

Tony cringed at the ferocity of the way his lover yelled his name. He quickly ended his conversation with Abby, saying, "Uh oh, I have to go!"

"DiNozzo! DINOZZO! Where are my swim trunks and why the hell is this bikini in my bag?"

end