Title: Just do it_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_Word count: 470_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_ Beta reader: Jisa

Warnings: Hiruma as usual (x Mamori, but very passively here) plus Yamato guest appearance

Summary: Just something Hiruma would never do…ever

Note: Written for 'Youichi fans' group (DeviantArt); theme was, well, 'Something Hiruma would never do'

Disclaimer: Eyeshield 21 manga was written by Riichiro Inagaki & illustrated by Yusuke Murata. It was serialized in Shueisha's Weekly Shonen Jump and later published in English by Viz Media. Eyeshield 21 anime was produced by NAS, animated by Studio Gallop. It premiered on TV Tokyo, sponsored by NFL Japan. I do not own anything about Eyeshield 21 and no one is profiting from anything written in this story.

Hiruma sneezed. Fucking flu'd been going around lately and he'd been feeling it alright. The half of the Saikyoudai Wizards had the same issue but that wasn't the problem here.

At first, he seriously considered sending a slave to do this errand he was stuck with. He would have paid good money to see fucking lizard's face performing the task at hand, but somehow he just couldn't bring himself to say the word out loud. It was a good plan, but there was also a 50:50 chance of it backfiring somehow, so he decided to do it himself.

There were just too many details he needed to watch out for, like the right place, the right brand, the right amount, and some messed up condition he remembered. '2 for 1, special deal, today only.' Those words still rung in his ears loudly, and they twitched violently at the memory. 'Being economical...' Well fuck that!

Damn it all to hell, why had he even agreed to this in the first place? Hiruma wasn't easily intimidated; actually, nothing was ever intimidating if he kept a cool head about it, but this was a different matter altogether.

The world's best have fallen here, so he figured his time too had come. So, there he stood in-between two rows of dangerous and unholy things, facing his worst nightmare. His eyes glared suspiciously all over the place until he finally found the reason of his distress, and he set out to get it.

If he had to name the situation he was in, 'the most fitting name would be Death Trap,' he thought.

Cross that. Locking eyes with fucking backstreet Yamato boy, who just happened to walk in here, the name became 'Dawn of Doom.' Of all the things in the world, the bastard just had to catch him doing this one. 'Oh, screw it…'

Being Commander from Hell and all, Hiruma simply grabbed the offensive object, barring his fangs to the fucking voajer. "Fucking girlfriend couldn't keep her fever down, and then this!"

He didn't know why he felt the need to explain himself to the bastard so he glared the object in hand with disgust once again. His features flipped to a devious, wide grin way too quickly and as final touch, Hiruma fiddled with his devil's handbook, just a little bit.

"Be smart, fucking teammate." He tapped Yamato's shoulder with it, proving a point, and with that done, he headed for the cash register, cool as ever.

OMAKE

Yamato remained frozen in place thinking he must have done something really wrong in a previous life to deserve such a punishment. Seeing the devil grin maniacally, emitting an ominous, dark aura while buying TAMPONS was definitely the scariest thing he had ever witnessed.

It was a punishment of a sort; Yamato was sure of it.

FIN

A/N: Feel free to check out 'Youichi fans' group contest on DA if you'd like to have a laugh at goofy ideas people had. When I read the theme, buying tampons was the first thing that came to mind… I really don't know why!

For those who didn't quite get it (my fault, I wanted to keep it as vague as possible), Hiruma was standing in a convenience store, somewhat female department, trying to find the right pack of tampons for lovely Mamori, while she was too sick to get out of bed. A very girlish thing to write, I know (and apologize), but Hiruma would never do that, would he? XD