Chapter 1

AN:This story was born after I saw the episode "Remembrance of Things Past." That look Derek had on his face made me write "Never Alone."...That helped, but I still felt like I needed to write a little bit more...So that being said, I hope you like this for our hero...

The generic, dryly decorated, beige walled office at the Department of Human Services was doing nothing to settle Derek Morgan's nerves. Neither was the equally bland, tight bunned, beige suited social worker sitting across from him. He was sure there was nothing wrong with Lena Matthews. She seemed nice enough, with her rather gentle smile and compassionate eyes, nearly hidden behind thick lensed, wire framed spectacles. It was all about her expression. It wasn't encouraging in the least.

In fact, it was rather sympathetic.

"Well, there are a lot of different options right now for you to explore, Mr. Morgan," Mrs. Matthews said, tapping her plain Bic® pen on the desk as she rifled through papers with those options.

He couldn't help but think there was something fundamentally wrong with a woman in children's services dressed like Mrs. Matthews was. Watching her, he thought that the woman should be dressed more like Penelope. This woman was the polar opposite of his Baby Girl. Penelope, with her colorful clothes, colorful glasses, even her colorful pens, exuded so much more energy, joy for life, and passion. Someone like her belonged in a career like this, instead of this bureaucrat with her starched white shirt and pasted on smile.

"I've looked at different avenues," he explained, shifting uncomfortably in his seat before he spoke again, "and I have come to the conclusion that foster care would be the best option for me."

She looked down her nose at him, then rifled through her papers and continued, "There are volunteer opportunities at youth centers in the DC area, as well as boys and girls—"

Derek bit back frustration. He didn't want to volunteer; he'd already done that. He didn't want to mentor; he'd done that, too. He didn't want to teach; he was still doing that with self defense classes.

No, what Derek Morgan wanted was to be a dad.

Ever since Ellie Spicer had left his life, he'd had a void he couldn't fill. Not that he wanted that particular little girl back; he was glad she was happy with her mother. She'd sent him emails and letters, letting him know she was okay and very happy. He wouldn't want to take joy away from an already happy family. Caring for Ellie, being there for her, made him realize he had a lot to give to a child in need.

After hearing about the atrocious conditions that Ellie had lived in at the so-called foster home she'd been at, he'd known he could do better. He could make kids happy. He'd always loved children, had a great bond with them, and gained their respect. He didn't know a whole lot about babies, but he wasn't looking for a baby. He wanted a school- aged kid with issues, maybe like he'd had growing up, that he could help raise up to their full potential.

Bottom line, he had a lot of love to give, and he wanted to be able to give it.

"I understand that," he interrupted. "Like I'd said, I've looked there."

The woman sighed in frustration with him, like he was thick headed. "Mr. Morgan, I seriously think you need to look again."

"Listen, lady—"

"No, you need to listen, Mr. Morgan," she snapped, her voice sharp and lacking all of the compassion and sympathy she'd had earlier. "You work non-stop, you're a self-proclaimed workaholic married to your job who gets called away at all sorts of hours to God knows where to face God knows what. You put your life in danger repeatedly—a noble career choice, mind you, but reeking of instability. You don't have the time to volunteer, yet you want to raise a child under your roof."

He started to shrink back in his chair, actually letting what he didn't want to hear sink in this time. The woman had said similar things earlier in their conversation, but he'd had excuses and had refused to listen.

She calmed back down again, and her face regained that sympathetic look Derek was starting to really hate. "Derek, you are obviously a very good man, with a wonderful heart, that truly does care. I applaud you for that. You have an excellent home, plenty of room, and a nice dog...but I could not possibly recommend you to foster a child."

"What should I do, then?"

"Until you are more stable, you need to consider the other options," she replied.

"How can I prove I'm stable? People on my team have kids, and they do just fine," he retorted quickly, thinking of the obvious. If Hotch and JJ could do it-have done it-so could he.

She sighed again. "But do they do it alone, Mr. Morgan? Completely by themselves, no other family members or significant others nearby?"

He growled in his throat and looked away. Hotch had Aunt Jessica, JJ had Will...he had Garcia—sort of … if she were available to help out when she wasn't out with her long-term boyfriend.

Grumbling, he asked sarcastically,"I suppose I could always get another dog if I feel I need to care for something?"

"Suit yourself," Mrs. Matthews said, then added seriously, "but I don't think you are home enough to care properly for a puppy, much less a child."

That knocked the wind out of his sails. He swallowed and sat up. "What do I need to do?"

"Stability, Mr. Morgan," she said. "You have a stable job, friends, a stable home, but you do not have the stability in your work that a child needs to thrive. With support, someone, perhaps, could handle it with your hours, but just one—"

Suddenly, Derek began to smile. He stood and shook the harridan's hand. "Thanks, Mrs. Matthews. You've opened my eyes."

The woman looked completely confused. "M-m-mr. Morgan?"

He turned and left the office, before dialing a number on his cell.

"Hey, Baby Girl," he said into the phone with a big grin on his face. "I'm getting married."

Penelope Garcia had just finished having lunch with her long time boyfriend, Kevin Lynch. She had somewhat of a headache now. Kevin had purchased a new video game over the weekend, and he'd been completely absorbed by it.

"Oh, Penelope! You are going to love playing this," he'd said, his voice nearly shrill with animation. "You're in Afghanistan, and you're a soldier on this rogue mission."

Penelope had known immediately with that description: she most certainly was NOT going to love that game.

She'd listened, her stomach churning, while Kevin had explained in detail every bloody, disgusting, violent thing that happened in the putrid game. He'd done so with a glazed passion in his eyes, a passion he only showed for video games. Nothing turned Kevin's crank quite like a new shoot 'em up game.

Penelope was the polar opposite. She was a pacifist who had to deal with that sort of thing at work, simply because she loved the people she worked with and the job. She could deal very nicely without seeing simulated violence, thank you very much.

But for some reason, her dear boyfriend could not get that through his head.

"Penelope!" he'd said, taking a bite of his peanut butter and bacon sandwich. "You saw the man's head explode, right? Completely obliterated the man's skull! It was gnarly!"

He'd grinned and nodded at her, so very excited.

She'd sighed, putting down her fruit salad she'd been trying to eat for dessert. She'd even smiled a little; he was kind of boyishly cute when he was so thrilled over his toy.

She'd looked at her phone. One new message. She'd tried to retrieve it while K-dog had blathered, but she couldn't do it. She had to wait until she was at the office.

So now, she stood at her machine and pushed the button...

And nearly passed out.