A/N: Hello lovely readers,

I have always had a thing for side-kicks (e.g. Pacey from Dawson's Creek; Hyde from the 70's show; Michael from Roswell; Logan from Veronica Mars; the short(er) and stout(er) M&M from... M&Ms... you get the idea...)

So here's my ode to side-kicks and side romances in all great (or less) sagas everywhere... the clawed Romeo and fanged Juliet (yes, yes, very corny ;)

I would love to give you a synopsis of this story - if I only knew it myself. As Richard Russo said in one of his interviews, I am slow to sense structure - but I make up for it with the frequency of updates (I typically like to write a chapter (even a short one) every day (except weekends) once the urgency of a story takes over. I have written fanfictions on other sites and have come to find out - to my great shame - that I am a writer who cannot write in a vacuum. I am greatly motivated by reader feedback. Who isn't? but still... I would love to write just for the sake of writing, but it's the ready feedback that really takes it to the next level ;) I know, I know... seriously vain. So, reviews would be greatly appreciated - about pluses or minuses in plot, dialogues, characterization, writing style (such as my tendency for run-on sentences and the overuse of ... and parentheses. But worry not, I am in the process of procuring a beta), etc etc...

And now without further ado,

OIL and WATER

Chapter 1:

He had always been an unflinching example of the rich and privileged douche-bag who she was sure was hiding the same-ol' neglected childhood-with-daddy-issues shit. Which made him, theoretically at least, not all that different from her own bubbly-blonde-pep-squad-pageant-queen-committee-freak neurotic with mommy issues.

Which all made it quite satirical that she was a vampire and he was a werewolf now. Talk about ruining their future plans of going on to live out the rest of their lives in shallow happiness that masked a deep-seated discontent while basking in the relative comforts of the lifestyle such as they were born to. Instead, now they were destined to live out the eternity that faced them in hunger, rage, and malice… ultimately dismantling into what she was sure would be an unrelenting monotony… totally uncool…

But being a vampire had some perks too, no doubt. It has made her… strong, certainly. Powerful? to a degree. Confident? Infinitely. But it wasn't the confidence that everyone perceived as such. In her case, it was the confidence to be as neurotic and insecure as she wanted. Which, surprisingly, was not as counterintuitive as it sounded.

The downside? The fact that she spiraled into these quasi-philosophical ponderings that had no clear objective and no end in sight. She hated Dr. Phil. She hated pop-psych. Hell, she had even hated the pretentious metaphysical musings of those fake high-schoolers in Dawson's Creek – with the exception of Pacey, of course. Pacey could tell her that the only true reality that existed was inhabited by a certain animated sea sponge that gained its fame from wearing square pants and she would have happily believed him without blinking. But she digressed. The point was that she couldn't abide the thought that what lay ahead of her was this barren flatland of her mind that seemed to be crumbling under the threat of an uncertain immortality by attacking itself. And its choice punishment - personal analysis. Oh, Lord, if she had any aim for the rest of her unnatural life, it would be to find a way to go back in time and kill that bitch Katherine before she had set out on her path to prove to everyone that she topped evil bitches everywhere… But the sad thing was, she was sure that even Katherine had her own story. Who the hell didn't, nowadays. She would love a villain who was evil just simply for the sake of being evil. Not because there was some poor sob story that was the backdrop of it all to somehow allow for excuses and entitlements…

Okay, she really needed to stop. This cynicism was totally unbecoming and it was driving her up the wall!

She heard a growl just then and glanced up from where she was perched in the dank outcropping of the cellar where he was shackled to the wall.

It was starting then… tonight would be the first night of the rest of his life… and all he had for company was a newly turned vampire mentally disintegrating from a premature and duly unwelcome existential crisis…

She would pay to have the raging hormones of teenagers again… to have every other issue that was any issue at all to be no more of an issue than how her ass looked in a particular pair of jeans or how much of her roots were showing or how adorable Matt was when he had that puppy-dog look in his eyes…

She had always been a sucker… and given what she was now, the irony of it all wasn't lost on her…