D. Gray-man © Katsura Hoshino

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Bookman's Log

October xx, xxxx

Current name: Lavi, Exorcist of the Black Order

Subject name: Karena, "The Angel Exorcist" of the Black Order

It has been over a week since nineteen-year-old Exorcist Karena went missing. The night before the disappearance, she and I were in the Black Order's library. Karena informed me of her past and everything she had been through in her five years of being an Exorcist. She was the last person to come in contact with General Cross Marian before he died. The General told her of her forgotten childhood.

As a child, Karena's father killed her mother and attempted to murder her. Karena was saved by one of Cross's modified Akuma. For three years, the Akuma was stable enough to take care of her. Then, one day, when Karena was ten years old, the Akuma lost control and attempted to kill her. With new found Innocence, the girl destroyed the man she thought was her father.

Later in the year, on a journey to find her "uncle," the deceased Cross Marian, Karena ran into two Noah for the first time. The Noah were Tyki Mikk and Sheryl Kamelot. The two men massacred all party members. Fortunately, Karena was able to fly away.

Years later, the red-haired Exorcist girl mastered her Innocence and found the Black Order. During her time here, she lost many close comrades, including Ashton Knight, General Kevin Yeegar, Daisya Barry, Sol Galen, Gwen Fraer, Tina Spark, Kazana Reed, Chakar Labón, and Suman Dark. The terrors Karena had seen were nearly the same as any Exorcist, but her soft heart could not take it, driving her slowly into an unstable mind.

From the beatings she received from her true father at a young age, Karena was not able to write as she had minor dysphasia. For years, she kept the disability to herself. I showed her the pleasure of books and reading, though I fear now that by her reading fiction, she might have been able to fall into fantasy worlds to escape her own.

When the girl became a woman at age nineteen, she plotted ways to get revenge on Tyki Mikk for killing her General. However, she was only a woman and fell into Tyki Mikk's charm. Behind the backs of the Black Order and the Clan of Noah, they had a secret love affair. By sleeping with him and getting to know the man, Karena believed that he truly loved her. The man went so far as to challenge his older brother when he – Sheryl Kamelot – threatened Karena's life.

Not long after this sneaking around, I was called to a mission to find General Cross with Allen Walker, Arystar Krory, Yu Kanda, Bookman, Lenalee Lee, and Miranda Lotto. When we returned, the Order was attacked by a Level Four Akuma. The Akuma forced Karena to extend her Innocence and nearly lose herself. Her Innocence level was unstable and there was no way she could control herself from attacking even her friends. It was Yu Kanda who snapped her out of it.

After said attack on the Black Order, Karena snuck away to find Tyki Mikk a completely different person. She shunned him and threatened his life if they were to meet again. Tyki had almost killed her friends, and she wouldn't stand betraying her home any longer.

Months later, Karena confronted the man she thought was her uncle. There General Cross revealed her past, and then sent her on her way. That very same night, General Cross Marian died.

After his death, Karena's mind spired to the edge of insanity. She became depressed and suicidal. Then, after she consoled in me her fears of being forgotten and alone, she ran away into the forest, never to be seen again.

I am still searching for her. I will never forget her. As long as there is still the chance that she is alive, I will make sure that I find her. The Order has made it a priority as well, but they are only planning to execute her for heresy. No, they do not know about her betrayal with the Noah, but they believe that there is no escape from their organization. When they find her, they will kill her.

If I find her, I will make sure she is safe and away from all this chaos.

Bookmen are not allowed to love. I am not saying I love her in that way, but I do care for her, despite my Bookman heritage. Before she left me that night, I asked her if she had feelings for Yu Kanda. She said no. I then asked her if she had feelings for Allen Walker, and she said no. But when I asked her how she felt about me, she did not answer. I want answers; I will not rest until I find her and comfort her one last time.

Signing off,

Lavi

It is day two of the search for Karena. There are no leads. Today is the first time that Lavi is allowed out of the Order to search for her himself. He did not tell Bookman these were his reasons for leaving the walls of the church. Lavi spent the whole day searching through the forest surrounding the Order. As far as he knew, no one has searched everywhere in this forest, but that is what he planned to do. When it got dark, he was forced to call it a day.

However, the next day, Lavi came to a new clearing in the forest, and – damn…how could they miss this?

The area was obviously a battlefield. Trees were split through the middle, toppled over on one another. Dried blood stained the grass beneath his boots. On a tree, Lavi found a piece of torn cloth. It was a jacket of a fine fabric. Yes, this piece of clothing was unmistakable. Tyki Mikk was here, and so was Karena.

Lavi suddenly found it hard to breathe. "Karena!" he called out to the forest, desperately hoping for a reply. A few birds scattered from the trees, but there was no sign of Karena anywhere. Cupping his hand around his mouth, he called even louder: "Karena!" His throat burned now. Lavi wet his lips and looked around. The forest was dead silent.

"Lavi?"

Was it her? Lavi spun on his heel…and met Allen Walker's worried stare. "Did-did you find her?" asked the boy.

Lavi sighed deeply. "No…I didn't. But look at this, Allen. She was here!" He held up Tyki's torn jacket piece. "And Tyki was here, too."

A fire blazed in Allen's eyes, and he stepped forward, snatching the cloth. Something told Allen that Tyki had something to do with this. Though he had no idea of what Tyki's relationship to Karena was, Allen knew Tyki was the cause of her disappearance. The two Exorcists listened intently to the world around them. Just as Allen was about to speak, Lavi silenced him, hearing something.

It was the ocean! And it wasn't far off.

As if reading one another's mind, Allen and Lavi took off to their left. They didn't stop running until they found the ocean that surrounded their island. The wind picked up around them.

Lavi caught it before it could be washed away in the wind. The two examined the eerily black feather. It was soft and sleek. A faint luminous green glowed around the feather. Innocence. Karena's Innocence.

"It can't be…" Allen whispered.

Looking beneath his feet, Lavi saw they were standing in a dark red patch in the grass: blood. Karena's blood, no doubt. Could she have been injured and flew off into the distance? Did she try to fly, but plummet into the sea?

Allen soon found himself breathless as well. "Let me see," he demanded, reaching for the feather. But just as soon as his fingertips touched it, the feather disappeared in sparkles. Tears formed in Allen's eyes. Now there was no way to tell if Karena was alive or not. She was gone, gone forever.

That feather was the last thing left of her, and now she's gone.

Karena – The Angel Exorcist.

End