I don't own anything Sonic the Hedgehog

I look at him admiringly and think to myself that age was good to Sonic the Hedgehog. Even at the age of thirty he looks as if he could still be eighteen. Oh, and his eyes…they still sparkle like emeralds in the sun whenever he smiles. He can still run faster than a speeding bullet, and probably could run around the entire world in a single day if the oceans were not in the way. He still makes smartass remarks at Knuckles on a daily basis, and still has the ability to make me laugh to the point of tears. His face looks aged, and he has the tiniest bit of wrinkles forming around his eyes from laughter throughout the years.

Even after all this time, all of these qualities still have the ability to make my heart leap up into my throat, choking me to the point where I have to remember how to breathe. I can still feel that same heart beating like drum within my chest, and although it sounds foolish, I think he can hear it sometimes. At times, when I gaze over in his direction, it feels like the first time I've laid eyes upon him. There are no firsts anymore, though. I know him inside and out, and he can read me like a book.

Only one thing remains a mystery; the rose.

Every year on my birthday, I receive a single red rose, and they are the most beautiful roses I have ever seen. I have been receiving them since my sixteenth birthday. On that day, I received sixteen roses and a note that read, "To make up for sixteen years without you. This rose pales in comparison to your beauty, Amy." Sonic and I had started dating shortly before that, so naturally, I thanked him for the roses. I can still remember the look up on his face; the look of shock and utter confusion.

"What roses, Amy?" he had asked, completely dumfounded. His gaze darted from me, to the roses, and then back to me again. Then, anger seemed to take over his entire demeanor. His green orbs flashed in such a way that jealousy herself would not have compared. "Wait, someone got you roses?"

"W…wait, you didn't get them for me?" I had been so taken aback by his words and reaction. I thumbed the card in my hand and bit my lip. What did this all mean? Did someone realize they had feelings for me just as Sonic swept me away? Who would send me roses if they knew about Sonic and I? Did it even matter? Sonic was mine, and that was all I cared about.

I then smiled up at him and kissed his nose gently. "You have nothing to worry about. You're all I care about, okay? I love you. Roses aren't going to change that." I sensed his body relaxing as I took his hand in my own. His eyes flickered from our intertwined hands to my eyes, taking my breath away immediately.

"Alright, Ames, I trust you. I doubt you'd do anything anyway, considering you've been waiting so long for me." He winked at me which made me laugh, blush, and smile all at the same time. Butterflies fluttered in my stomach and my heart pounded with such a rhythm I completely forgot about everything, including the roses.

That is, until the next year.

I remember it very clearly. I had thought the roses were a one year occurrence because sixteen is a very special birthday for girls. I had just woken up, and while sitting up and stretching in bed with a yawn, I glanced over towards the window. Something caught my eye on the windowsill. It was pure and beautiful with a note tied against the green and thorns.

A little confused, alarmed on how it got in my room, yet curious, I reached over and took the flower in my hand. I brought it up to my nose, taking in the soft, dazzling, romantic scent while velvet tickled my nose gently. My breath caught in my throat and I was reminded of something that I couldn't quite place. My heart…it felt as if something were missing. I felt tears prickle my eyes when I realized I hadn't read the note yet.

Careful to avoid the thorns, I delicately untied the pink ribbon and looked at the note. "Amy," I read aloud quietly, my voice shaking slightly, "another year, another rose…may this new year bring you the happiness that you deserve." I could see that something was erased, but I couldn't quite make out the words. A sigh escaped my lips as I thought grimly about how I was going to break the news to Sonic. Another thought had entered my mind though; just who was sending me these roses?

"Ames?" I am suddenly brought back to the present by his voice. I glance up at him and am reminded just how lucky I truly am to have him in my life. Admirer or no admirer, I know that. I should know that.

"Sorry," I apologize with a fleeting smile, my heart skipping a beat, though I am not sure why. "What were you saying?"

I can tell he is annoyed as an exasperated sigh escapes his lips. He runs a hand through his quills roughly and then flops down on his back. He then turns over towards me, hand propping his head up. He flashes a dazzling grin and I feel my mind blank in an instant. I can tell he senses this and lets out a roar of laughter.

"Amy, you're too much sometimes." I take this as a compliment from the laughing and smile back. He pats his hand on the spot right next to him. Slowly, I lie down next to him and he puts his free arm around my waist. I look up into his eyes before nestling my head by his chest. His warmth already fills my soul, and at once, I am comfortable and at home.

He strokes my head for a while, and as I am almost to the point of sleep, he speaks quietly. It is almost like a whisper of a child who is afraid of getting into trouble. So faint, I have to listen carefully to make sure I hear it.

"You love me, right?"

I am so surprised by this question that I have to think for a couple of seconds to make sure I really heard him right. "W…what? Of course I love you, Sonic!" I lift my head up and stare up at him. I touch his cheek gently, caressing. He nuzzles my hand and sighs.

"Just making sure."

"What makes you think I don't?" I find myself asking curiously. "You see what you do to me."

He laughs and with that presses his lips to mine gently, his hand on the small of my back bringing me in closer. I gasp behind the kiss, my heart beating furiously. He pulls back and I take in a deep gulp of air, my brain forgetting how to do everything. He laughs once more, touching my lip with his fingers.

"You're too cute. I love you."

I look up at him again and smile. "I know."

He cups my face in his hands gently, and kisses me, this time a little more roughly. I sigh as he moves as close to me as he can. I take in his scent; he smells of freshly cut grass in the summertime, which makes my head spin. His body feels so warm beside me, and I can faintly feel his heart beating, opposite mine.

We break apart for a moment, just long enough to gaze into each other's eyes before I trust in him to know what to do.

I feel so sick, is the first thought that comes to mind when I wake up. I keep my eyes shut because I'm afraid of what will happen when I open them. I breathe deep and shallow, trying to keep this feeling my stomach from coming out. I feel like crying. I feel almost…empty, yet overflowing at the same time. Once again, thoughts pour into my mind, I feel so sick…what's wrong with me?

"Amy?" I hear his voice, high with concern and worry. I feel the mattress shift slightly as he sits up and moves closer to me. I want him to comfort me, yet, I want him to stay away at the same time. So many conflicting feelings run through my head. I have no idea what to think or feel.

I can tell he knows I'm awake because he places a hand on my head. I recoil slightly from the touch; it feels like fire on my skin. It's like I've been burned, and the mark will always be there to show to the world. He hesitates before deciding to put his hand on me again, rubbing my head gently. "Are you okay?"

I shake my head no and instantly regret it. A groan escapes my lips as I jump up quickly, and run to the bathroom. I barely make it to the toilet in time before the contents in my stomach come up and out. It tastes horrible, and I can feel the acid biting the inside of my mouth. I cough and the next thing I know, Sonic is instantly at my side. I steal a look at him and feel guilty at the look upon his face. He is anxious, and fear is etched in those beautiful eyes; I didn't even think fear was part of his vocabulary. I force myself to stare into his green pools and voice my concerns.

"What's wrong with me?"

I stare at the piece of plastic, unsure of how to feel, which seems natural nowadays. So many different emotions swirl within me; anger, sorrow, happiness, wonder, the future… but, I wonder, why am I even angry or sad? I love him. This is who I want this to happen with. This is our life, the start of a new family, and I just love him.

I take a deep breath, looking at the cross that I now have to bear. There is now a little beating heart, a soul, and a little hedgehog inside of me. I smile, wiping away the salty tears and begin to laugh. I'm pregnant! All these years, Amy Rose, pregnant with Sonic the Hedgehog's child! Thirteen year old me would be ecstatic if she ever thought this would be happening. Only, I think thirteen year old me would not be feeling all of these emotions. She would be feeling only happiness.

Leaning against the wall, I look at the door leading into his bedroom. I throw the plastic test into the trash, a bit harsher than I meant to, and wash my hands. I think about how maybe this means Sonic will finally propose like I want him to. I know there is no one else I'd rather do this with but him. At that moment, though I cannot explain why, the rose enters my mind again. Hesitantly, I look at the door again and wonder if this is truly what I want. Do I really want my life to be with Sonic? He's all I've ever known, all I've ever loved…could there be someone else?

"No," I say aloud, "I am happy the way things are."

With that, I walk out into the room to give the news.

We sat there, eating in silence. The noise of him chewing his cereal silently drove me mad. I don't think it was necessarily the noise of the cereal crunching, but the fact that we were both silent. I at least wanted a "Happy birthday, Ames!" or a, "how'd you sleep last night?" would be great. Just something.

As if he had heard my thoughts, his sweet voice cuts the silence like a knife. "So…you think…you're going to get another rose this year?"

Okay, let me rephrase, anything but that.

I carefully chew the rest of the cereal in my mouth, and then swallow. I allow myself to glance up at him before shrugging casually. The subject of the rose was always a touchy one for him, especially now that I am pregnant with his child and we are engaged. Sonic was jealous, simple as that. I think it bothers him that someone besides else has the ability to take over my thoughts in such a simple way. I am always scared to admit it, but I really want to know who the rose barer is, and I think that's what drives him insane.

"Well," I begin quietly, knowing very well what he wants to hear, "I haven't gotten one yet, have I?" This is strange, I think to myself, usually I get the rose in the morning. My heart wrenches in my chest. I always secretly look forward to the rose. Somehow, it always seems to top Sonic's gift. Yes, Sonic's gifts are beautiful and enchanting, but the rose, I cannot explain it. The rose is thoughtful, romantic, sincere…everything I want.

But I already have everything I want and more.

My words seem to cheer Sonic up. He gets up and cleans off the table with a small bounce in his step. I laugh a little and he turns around and flashes a toothy grin at me. I smile right back because I know I'm supposed to.

"You feeling up to going to Rouge and Knuckles' place? They wanted to throw you a small birthday party."

I smile once more and nod. "I would love to," I reply and then ask, "what time?"

"I dunno, sometime this afternoon I 'spose," he shrugs and then swoops down over me to give me a sweet kiss. His lips linger on mine for a moment before pulling away. I can still feel his warm breath on my face and I take a deep breath. He chuckles slightly and then exhales. "Amy," he begins quietly, "You still love me, right?"

"Of course I do!" I say automatically, staring up at him, my eyebrow raising. "Why do you keep asking that?"

He runs a hand through his quills before responding. "I dunno…you seem occupied with your thoughts lately. You don't seem yourself, and to be honest, I'm really worried. Am I doing something wrong?" At the last question, I can see the hurt and confusion in those kelly green eyes of his. The guilt builds up, threatening overflow and I begin to cry.

"Ahhh…no, Ames, don't cry." He wraps his arms around me, rubbing my back in a soothing manner. "Shh, don't cry please." This only makes me cry harder though, and a sob racks through my body. I dig my head into his chest, seeking the warmth and the comfort I've always known. I feel it; it's still there, but just faintly.

"What's wrong with me?" I echo my fears from the other day, but this time, I don't mean it in the manner I did before. "Oh, Sonic, what's wrong with me?"

"Nothing," he assures me in a quiet tone, "there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. Amy, you are an amazing girl and an amazing girlfriend and fiancée. You have the ability to make anyone smile and brighten anyone's day. Don't you think for one second something is wrong with you. You're perfect and I love you." He kisses my forehead and squeezes me.

I nod and I hug him back. Tears still stream down my face and I whisper into his shirt, "You're perfect too." I know this. He's perfect for me. He's good to me, honest, kind, helpful, and wonderful. I should not be feeling like this. He always has the ability to take my breath away and I've known since I was younger that my heart beats for him. I've always known we were meant to be and that I loved him. I've never doubted all of this…until now.

I'm scared, I realize. I'm scared of losing him. I'm scared of these thoughts. I'm scared of myself. I'm scared of that rose.

I hug him tighter. "I love you so much," I manage to croak out as he holds me close. "I'm sorry…I'm so sorry."

"I know," he murmurs gently, "I know."

We stayed embraced like that for hours, listening to each other's breathing, hearts beating, and unspoken words.

His hand feels warm on the small of my back, and his breath tickles my ears. "You okay?" he whispers for just us to know. I nod and smile up at him reassuringly. Both of us have not forgotten the scene in the kitchen, and his worry is apparent.

I pretend to be happy because that's the part I am supposed to play. I know I'm not doing it as well as I usually do because Sonic is at my side constantly, whispering into my ear every couple of minutes to make sure I'm still okay. It annoys me slightly, but I know it is just because he cares. I get glances from the others who then make eye contact with Sonic, a silent communication. I want to run away from all of this and just be free, which almost makes me laugh, because this is how Sonic must feel at times.

When did the roles reverse? When he did become so clingy and me so…unattached?

I ask Sonic to go get me something to drink and he complies, wanting to make me happy so badly it hurts us both. There is another whisper in my ear, except this one is dark and husky. It sends shivers down my spine, which both bothers and excites me.

"You look like a train wreck. Need some fresh air?" I look up and green meets red. The color of his eyes reminds me of the color of a red rose, and I suddenly feel sick. I nod and he shouts to Sonic that we are going to take a small walk.

I watch Sonic's guarded face, looking for clues on how he feels about this. He nods cautiously, but I can tell from the way his eyes refuse to leave mine that he doesn't want me out of his sight. I suddenly feel like crying. I feel like I'm tearing him apart, and I don't want to hurt him. I just wanted to run over there and hug him and kiss him and ask for him to forgive me for the way I've been acting. Shadow's hand intertwines in mine and my feet follow in turn. My heart starts beating very fast, but I am unsure why. I want to scream out but no voice leaves my mouth. I see Sonic take a step towards me and then I am outside.

I take a deep breath while the autumn air surrounds me, cool and crisp. I can smell the leaves and the freshly cut grass and I feel a pain in my chest. It smells like Sonic. The colors of the trees are red and it reminds me of love but it also reminds me of Shadow's eyes. I am torn between the old and the new, and I don't know which is right anymore.

I can feel his eyes on me, and they burn so intensely that I feel like crying out. "Can we go for a walk and talk?" His voice is timid and careful, guarded like Sonic was back inside. I can tell he doesn't want to upset me, but I cannot help but feel upset right now. I nod anyway, hoping that maybe I'll get some of the answers I've been internally searching for.

We walk for about five minutes until we come to field full of late autumn flowers. The sun is beginning to set, painting a scene of oranges, reds, and yellows that highlight the colors that surround us. It takes me a moment to realize that we are in a field of natural roses; whites, pinks, yellows, and reds. My breath catches in my throat as the realization almost knocks me off of my feet. My eyes meet his and I can tell he knows that I know. Those red eyes plead with me to understand and hear him out but I rip my hand out of his.

"Why?" I ask, my voice shaking, "Why didn't you tell me? Why are you doing this to me?" I feel so infuriated, so hurt, betrayed, and so lost. I did not want to take my anger and feelings of confusion out on him, but everything comes out at once. "Why can't you just get out of my head?" I take a deep breath, trying to control what I was feeling. I sounded like a child, but I haven't been one in a while. I've figured out in the recent years emotions are not as easy to deal with now as they were back then. Nothing is set in stone.

He was always there when I needed someone to talk to, always there when I needed a helping hand. Now I know why.

His eyes…are the same damn color as that damned rose!

He chuckles slightly to himself and I can feel my eyes narrowing at him. He finds my turmoil funny! Then, my heart cannot seem to control itself as he speaks. "Now that's the old Amy. The girl who is so passionate, whose eyes sparkle like early morning dew on the grass, who has a fiery temper that no one can control…where have you been?" The last part is a whisper as he touches my cheek for an instant, enough for me to feel the warmth of his palm.

At this, I feel the tears pierce my eyes, threatening to fall. I whisper, "I don't know. I don't know what's wrong with me."

He looks away. "Nothing. Everything. Maybe a little bit of both."

I was expecting something similar to Sonic's response, and yet, to my utter bemusement, I get no direct answer. "That makes no sense."

"Does it?" he glances back at me; a mysterious smile plays at his lips. "I think it makes total sense. Nothing is wrong, yet, at the same time, you feel as if everything is wrong. You don't know exactly what you want anymore." I stare at him completely dumfounded. He chuckles quietly. "You always were easy to read."

"Then why did you give me those roses?" I demand, "You knew I was in love with Sonic. You knew it would never work between us, you know these things! I've loved him from day one and I'll love him till the day I die. It's that simple…it's always been that simple."

He was quiet for what felt like forever. It took all of my self-control not to shout and scream at him to say something. The silence was driving me insane. I was shaking. Finally, "Are you happy?" A simple question, but it completely blew me out of the water.

I stood there, babbling like an idiot, "W…what? Of course I'm happy! That's a stupid question."

"Then why don't you seem it?" he retorted, arms folded across his chest. "You used to be this happy go lucky girl who was bubbly to the point where I wanted to burst your bubble because it could be so damn annoying at times—"

"—Well then I guess you got your wish—"

"—but we miss it. I miss it. Sonic misses it. And I think you miss it too." It was true. I really did miss my old self, but I was grown up now. That was the old me, this is the new. This is what I wanted. Is it what I wanted? What the hell do I want anymore?

He bends down and picks out a ruby red rose. He places it into my hands, carefully so I won't get pricked by the thorns. "You're just like this rose, you know," he murmurs so quietly I have to strain to hear it. "You're beautiful and deadly. You smell like the sweetest flower, you're soft to the touch, and completely open with everyone. You're everyone's favorite, yet, you have your guards as well. You have your thorns; you're moments when you completely shut off to everyone else. You hurt, Amy, and you hurt those who only want to love you and be with you the most—"

"That's not fair," I interrupt, anger bubbling to the surface again.

"Like hell it isn't," he spats at me. I recoil and find myself no longer able to look him in the eyes. "You hurt Sonic because you can't cope with whatever you're going through right now. He only wants to love and care for you, and that's what you wanted for so damn long, isn't it? And now that you have it, you're just pushing him away to the point where you're breaking him in half."

"Stop it," I whisper, shutting my eyes tight. I don't want to hear anymore. I don't want to be here anymore!

"You're hurting yourself, Amy," he continues as if I haven't even said a thing, oblivious to my sufferings, "I can see it. You're breaking in half too. I'm worried you're full bloom is almost over…you're wilting. And it hurts me to see you hurting yourself."

"I'm happy," I tell mostly myself, "I'm happy with how things are. I'm just…I don't know, but I am happy with him and nothing you say is going to change that!"

"I never said I was going to change it," he retorts, "I just want to know what you want, because I don't think you even know yourself anymore."

"I know what I want," I tell him, crossing my arms across my chest, putting up a guard.

"What is that, exactly?" he asks me, moving over to me, placing both of his hands on my shoulders, looking me straight in the eyes. I want to look away so badly, but I find myself unable to, mesmerized.

"I…."

The next thing I know, his lips come crashing down upon mine, and I forget how to breathe in an instant. My knees threaten to buckle, and tears fall down my cheeks onto his hands. He tastes sweet, like nectar, and he smells like the roses in the field. His lips are velvet on mine, and I feel like everything I've been missing is right here.

But this is wrong. All of this is wrong.

My mind comes rushing back to the situation and I push myself away, panting. My heart is up in my throat, suffocating me, and I feel like I'm going to explode. I cannot find the words to speak at the moment, and I can see something in his eyes; satisfaction? Worry? Love?

The seed was planted back when I was sixteen…and it finally turned into something beautiful, like that of a rose. I am in full bloom.

"I can't," I tell both him and myself, "Shadow…I'm pregnant and engaged to him. I love him." I back away shaking my head, even more confused, and yet, feeling like everything has been figured out.

"Amy…" he begins, unsure of what to say. The look of shock is apparent on his face. His eyes flicker to the ring on my finger, and then to my belly. I know he had no idea…we were going to tell everyone about the baby and engagement tonight. He then looks frustrated, and his hands ball up into fists. I am unsure if he is angry at me or angry with himself for waiting for so long.

I thumb the petals in my hand, and they feel soft to the touch, comforting me. They feel like Sonic's hands tracing along my back, but they feel like Shadow's lips. They smell like Shadow, but the area around us smells like Sonic.

Suddenly, everything makes sense. Sonic's love is all around me. The wind that whistles in my ear and moves my hair is his hand tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, and him whispering softly to me in the dark. He is the grass beneath my feet, and the world all around me. Shadow…Shadow is just the rose. Mysterious, romantic, sensual, but won't last. Sonic will always be there in my life, and will always be the one I love, but Shadow is just the gift that gets misplaced after a while. He is the curiosity in the back of my mind that whispers, "What if I wasn't with Sonic? What if I loved someone else?"

I touch his cheek gently, trying to convey everything I feel, but know I will only fail miserably. "I'm sorry," is the only thing that escapes my lips, but there is so much more I want to say. I want to tell him thank you for everything. Thank you for helping me realize what I had all along was good enough for me, and was the only thing I ever truly wanted in the first place.

"You're going back to him." It wasn't a question. His voice sounded dead. His eyes looked…dull.

I nod and try to smile, but fail and give up. "Maybe…maybe if things had been different we could have worked out. Maybe if I wasn't pregnant. Maybe if I wasn't engaged. Maybe if I had met you first. Maybe. That's…that's all we're ever going to be."

Suddenly, his hands grab my shoulders roughly, to the point where I cry out in pain. I look up into crazed eyes, and am suddenly reminded of when I first received the roses. The look in his eyes was the same that were in Sonic's. Jealousy, anger, and…hurt.

"Shadow."

My lips speaking his name break him out of his trance. He lets go of me, looking ashamed at himself. He mumbles a small apology. "Can you…can you just go?"

I don't want to, but I comply. I run the other way, wanting to get back to Sonic, but I stop, looking down at the rose in my hand. I wonder to myself if this will be the last rose I get from him. I wonder if this will be the last time I see him. I clutch it to my chest and wish I wasn't like this cursed thing. I didn't want to hurt the ones closest to me, especially him.

"Shadow, I'm sorry," I look back at his figure standing by the roses. I watch as he picks one from the field, staring at it. He brings it up to his nose and then casts it aside. He looks over at me and our eyes meet for a moment.

My heart pains for him and he runs in the opposite direction. "Goodbye, Shadow the Hedgehog." I stare at the spot where he had stood just moments before. A finger touches my lips and a sigh is cast into the wind.

Just a what if…a maybe…

I don't want to deal with this right now, but I force myself to take a deep breath and smile up at him. "A what if and a maybe," I reply. His face is etched in confusion so I kiss him on the lips. "And you are the future and a forever." I leave it at that, and he knows better than to ask for more.

I never received any more roses for the rest of my birthdays, but that was okay for me. I realized I had the gift I always wanted, and I was lucky enough to have him in my life for the rest of my years. We had a family together and so many memories that I would not trade for anything. He was my first and only love, and that good enough for me. I wonder about Shadow at times, and hope that he is still doing okay.

The rose still stands on my dresser, a reminder, a love that never could be.

A birthday gift for my friend PantedgieQueen13.

I'm actually kind of proud of this story. I needed to get all of my emotions out and what i've been feeling, so I hope this makes sense to everyone. Title was inspired by the song "kiss from a rose". The story wasn't going to initially be like this...the focus was going to be more on the roses on the birthdays than Amy's inner feelings. I thought the description and symbolism of the rose was fitting though, and honestly, for two years of not writing I think I did an okay job.

I hope you all enjoyed it!