You guys are getting spoiled… I sat down to write the next chapter of that Kingdom Hearts story… only to find that I couldn't stop planning out this chapter. So I wrote this one instead. Oh well. I accepted a long time ago that my writing is at the mercy of my whims.

This chapter ended up being very dialogue-heavy, but I enjoyed writing it.

Thank you so much for reviewing the last chatper: Tamuril2 and Silimaira! I can't tell you how pleased I was to see two older reviewers keeping up with this story even though so much time tends to pass between updates. And welcome Apple of Eris! I love new reviewers too, of course! So thank you all, and I hope you continue to enjoy this story!

Chapter Twenty-One: Resolve

Dinner that night was quiet. Luke and I were equally pensive, but I was too wrapped up in my own questions to even begin to wonder what was weighing on my brother's mind. At last, with a little thrill in the pit of my stomach, I decided it was time. If not for the whole story, then for the beginning at least.

I cleared my throat, working around the sudden nervousness. And when I did speak, the words were overly casual, the inflection all wrong. "Hey, Luke… Remember how Dad died?"

He paused and gave me an odd look, slowly raising one eyebrow. "That drastic moment that shaped our childhood? Yeah, I seem to remember something about that."

It was my turn to give him a look, for unnecessary amounts of sarcasm. "Yeah, but do you remember how he died?"

Luke's expression was suddenly grim, and I held my breath in anticipation. Had the answers been right in front of me the whole time?

"…What do you remember?" he asked at last, slow and a little bit wary.

"Practically nothing," I answered honestly. "Just that it was really dark."

Luke had now begun to slide his empty cup between his palms. He was avoiding my eyes. "Mom never really talked about him when you were around… I got the feeling she was trying to preserve some image you had of him."

I nodded. I had been aware of this, but I hadn't thought it was specific to me. I'd just assumed most parents did this when the other half of their team died prematurely. Immortalized that other half in an overly-shiny, fairy tale sort of way. But apparently, our mother had not worried about sparing Luke from reality.

My brother seemed to know exactly what I was thinking. "It wasn't like we had some sort of secret pact or anything. We weren't trying to keep you in the dark. But you were so out of it the next few days, even after they let you out of the hospital… Mom was worried. And so was I."

Luke finally looked up, and my obvious confusion stopped him. "Hospital?"

The expression on his face was pained. "Carly… No one really knows how Dad died. Well, technically, we've got the how. The police ruled it a homicide. But they never caught the guy or figured out a motive. After a while, they stopped looking. The neighbors told them that Dad had always been kinda… shady. I think their unofficial conclusion was that he was part of a gang or something. It was an easy answer," he concluded a little bitterly. "After all, what's so strange about a gang member's life being cut short, right? They got to move on to other cases, and no one was pressuring them to justify it. So…"

He trailed off, but my ears were ringing. "But… What does that have to do with me?"

"Carly, you were there. The police found you with Dad's body, out in the woods. You were unconscious, and they took you to the hospital. The doctors said you were perfectly fine. In shock, but fine. Except when the police tried to interview you, you couldn't remember anything."

I was dumbfounded. I couldn't even string the words together to ask another question. I'd been suffering from amnesia for years, and I hadn't even known? It felt like a crucial aspect of my life, and I hadn't even been aware I was missing anything.

Even in my shocked state, I realized that Luke's version of events didn't completely make sense. Where did Koda factor into all this? And what role did Dad's interworldly travels play? I'd gotten the idea stuck in my head that if I could just figure out how he'd died, everything would make sense. But I'd begun to realize that I still didn't really know the man at all.

…

However, this knowledge did stall my new, self-imposed training. I was suddenly afraid of what I might find. I wasn't sure I wanted the story to pan out any further. And I wasn't the only one.

Luke was still pensive the next morning. He approached the subject again over breakfast. "I know you and Mom haven't been… close for a long time, but… I mean, she did the best she could. Not having answers was killing her, but she stopped cooperating with the investigation as soon as she realized you didn't remember anything. She didn't want you to remember."

"She didn't want me to remember that I couldn't remember anything? Shouldn't I have had some say in that?"

I was feeling prickles of anger, and I was only vaguely sure why. I knew I was being irrational, but… For a long time—six years now—my image of early post-Dad Mom was pretty pathetic. The woman I knew had barely been able to take care of herself. And now I was supposed to coincide that image with the one of a woman who'd been together enough to orchestrate some grand cover-up?

"Carly, we were six. Would you want to make a little kid relive watching her father die?"

We ate in silence after that. I knew everything Luke had said was justified. And maybe it was because my mother and I hadn't been close in a long time that I was a little reluctant to forgive her. Even if she had been protecting me from the shadows, I distinctly remembered having to be my own support system after our father's death. If anything, she'd made the whole ordeal even harder on me. Perhaps that was what I couldn't forgive.

Luke and I walked out the door to leave for work together, but we parted ways once we were in the thick of the village. I could already see a few customers seated on the stools when I arrived at the ramen stand. It was awfully early for that… A sure sign of a busy day. Which made me feel even guiltier for what I was about to do.

Teuchi was always lenient, and I'd never tried to push his goodwill. It wasn't even like I would be taking a pair of hands away from the counter, but it would cause just as much trouble for them if their deliveries started piling up.

Even as busy as they were, Teuchi still spotted me creeping up sheepishly on the back entrance before I could say anything. I was relieved to see him flash a familiar indulgent smile my way.

"Don't tell me," he called over his shoulder, continuing to knead the dough, "you're bailing."

"What?" Ayame cried. "Today?"

I cringed at her dismay. This was exactly what I'd been afraid of. And how did I justify calling out when I was literally standing at their door? Luckily, Teuchi saved me from struggling to put my chaotic life into words.

"We're just playing, Carly. I've been expecting it, actually. I know you've got friends in the middle of all this excitement. Go check back in with them. And while you're at it," he turned and grabbed a decorative box off the back counter, "give this to Naruto, will you?"

I took it from him gratefully. "I will. …Are you sure this is really okay?" I knew I should just take my good luck and run with it, but I still felt bad.

"Yes, I'm sure," he said with a chuckle. "Ayame and I ran this place for years without help. We can manage for a day. If people are really that desperate for their deliveries, they can come pick them up. Now, go on. And tell Naruto we're rooting for him in the finals."

I thanked them profusely, rushing off only when the customers began trying to peer over the counter to see what was going on. Naruto hadn't actually been first on my list of people to track down, but I quickly remapped my plans for the day. Good thing, too. My hyperactive blond friend was just rushing out the door as I arrived. He skidded to a halt when he spotted me, holding out my only delivery of the day like the gift that it was.

"Carly! Hey, what are you doing here?"

Naruto always managed to bring a smile to my face. I beamed at him and gestured to the box in my hands. "A gift. From Teuchi and Ayame. We've missed you around here. It's hard to believe you've gone two whole weeks without a visit."

He flashed his signature grin in return. "I've been training! The finals of the Chunin Exams are less than a month away! You'll be there, right?!"

"Of course! Already have my ticket and everything!" I'd forgotten just how difficult it could be to avoid getting sucked into his enthusiasm. It was hard to believe how many characters (people, I reminded myself) took in that enthusiasm and then proceeded to ridicule him.

"Awesome! Well, I gotta go find the Pervy Sage! I'll tell you all about the exams later!"

"Naruto, wait!" But he was already running in the opposite direction, long gone before I ever could have caught up. I looked down at Teuchi's gift, still in my hands. I hadn't opened it to look, but whatever was inside was sure to be edible. I could return home and put it in my own fridge, to give back to him later… But I was eager to make my second visit of the day.

I tried the front door just in case, but it was, of course, locked. I looked around, really observing Naruto's home for the first time. The only window I could spot was the one that led out onto his balcony. This outer hallway was open to the air, but, even after circling the whole building, I didn't see any way to get up to said balcony from the outside. Not without crazy ninja skills, anyway. Who had designed this place?

At last, I pushed a few empty crates beneath the balcony at an angle. They wobbled precariously as I stepped up, but I managed to stay balance atop them. I was just tall enough to slip the box up onto his balcony, through the bars. Now came the tricky part.

I wrapped my hands around the bars and quickly concluded that I wouldn't be pulling myself up that way. My upper-body strength had never exactly been something to gloat about. And I wasn't left with too many other options. I took a deep breath and crouched down… and then jumped as high as I could.

Which wasn't an impressive height but turned out to be just high enough. I grabbed hold of the railing and winced as I heard the crates tumble down below me. Well, giving up and jumping down just became a much less pleasant option. But my arms were already getting sore just from the few seconds they'd been supporting my weight. I shifted my hands, moving down a few inches, my body swinging below me like I was on a jungle gym. This was not turning out to be one of my better ideas…

"Carly? …What are you doing?"

The voice startled me so badly, I almost lost my grip. I turned my head to the side, just enough to see Sakura standing on the street below, staring quizzically up at me.

"It's… kind of a long story," I called back.

A second later, she had jumped up onto Naruto's balcony, directly from the street outside the building.

"Show off…" I muttered. But she only failed to suppress a few giggles as my expense. I had just managed to swing one leg up onto the balcony, my toes pressed up against the bars, but I was clearly struggling. Sakura reached over and grabbed my upper arms, pulling me up and over with that superhuman strength she was already showing signs of.

We collapsed back onto the balcony, panting but laughing, too. Sakura took a good look around for the first time.

"Hey, isn't this Naruto's house?"

"Yeah." I grabbed the box, which had toppled over sideways in our struggle. "I've got a delivery for him. But he ran off before I could give it to him."

"So you're breaking into his house? What if the window's locked too?"

I hadn't considered that. But my doubt only lasted for a second. This was Naruto we were talking about. Frankly, I was impressed he remembered to lock his door. I took a few steps and pressed one hand up against the glass pane. And, just as I'd expected, the window eased open with no resistance.

I glanced back at Sakura with a smile and dropped Teuchi's gift onto Naruto's bed, which he had not made before leaving, and proceeded to climb through the window myself. …And was about as graceful about it as could be expected. I landed on the mattress with a belly flop and accidentally bounced off onto the floor. Sakura remained perched on the windowsill behind me.

She looked around, still hesitant, as I made room in our friend's fridge. "This place is a mess…"

And it was about as neat as you'd expect. Even though Naruto had only been back for about a week, there were already clothes and miscellaneous… junk strewn around the room. But I couldn't say I was all that bothered by it. I was just relieved that my 'mission' had been accomplished. So much trouble for a single delivery…

But when I turned back to the window, Sakura had not moved. She was still staring in with that sad, almost dazed look. When she finally noticed me watching her, she said, "You know, I forget sometimes that he lives all alone… In fact, I used to look down on him for it."

I shifted a little awkwardly from foot to foot. Yeah, Sakura didn't have a lot of shining moments, but I wasn't too crazy about becoming the one she habitually unloaded her gloom on. I didn't really excel at comfort.

"I wouldn't worry about it," I tried anyway. "He's not really the grudge-holding type."

"You're right." She still looked kind of bummed about it, though. I crossed the room and opened his front door, finally prompting her off the windowsill. We casually walked out of his door, closing and relocking it behind us, and looking like we'd never broken into his house.

"So what were you doing here in the first place?" I asked at last.

"Oh, I'm actually on my way to the hospital."

"Really?" I glanced sideways at her before adding, "'Cause that's kinda in the opposite direction…"

I sort of expected her to ignore me calling her out. I certainly wasn't going to push her on the lie, but her face flushed a bright red, and she had to elaborate.

"That's true… Okay, I was actually stopping by to see if Naruto had heard anything about Sasuke."

Ah. I should have figured. I smiled, but didn't laugh and smoothly moved the conversation along. "Why are you going back to the hospital?"

"Well, I've actually been thinking a lot about the day you came to visit me… And I've decided I am going to look into becoming a medic. I'm tired of being the one who's always left behind!"

I was pleased to see the fire in her eyes. I hadn't been sure any good would actually come out of our little talk.

"I think I've done all the book research I can," Sakura continued. "So I'm going to see if I can find someone to apprentice under at the hospital."

"That's great!" I may not have known Sakura that well, but my encouragement was genuine. "I'd say you should ask Kakashi for recommendations, but he's missing too isn't he?"

"Yeah… How did you know?"

"Oh, uh, I think Naruto mentioned it…"

We had reached the hospital entrance. I knew my way to Lee's room by now, so Sakura and I parted ways in the lobby. I didn't have any real plans as I made my way up the stairs. I'd begun to spend my time here just sitting by his beside. The silence had stopped bothering me. Perhaps I was learning patience after all.

But when I reached the doorway to his hospital room, I knew immediately that Lee was awake. He slowly turned his head on the pillow at the sound of the door opening. His bruises had not fully healed, and there was a dull sheen to his eyes, but the fact that they'd taken him out his of medical coma had to be a good sign, right?

My face split into a wide smile at the sight. It seemed to take him a minute to recognize me.

"Carly…" he acknowledged at last as I took a few steps into the room.

"How are you feeling?" I asked, taking the seat beside his bed. Being in the hospital, in the presence of someone in such drastic condition, lowered my voice to a whisper. But if Lee minded… Well, he didn't seem able to mind at the moment.

"Can't feel anything right now…" His speech was slow and slurred, but he was present, at least.

"Well, maybe that's a good thing." He didn't object as I brought a hand up to brush a few fingertips over one of his yellowing bruises.

"What day is it?" Despite his state, there was still something firm and intense about his question. I wondered if he thought I was coddling him and resolved not to touch him again, and to keep any pity I had to a minimum. He kept his eyes steady on me, and I knew what he was really asking.

"There are about two weeks until the finals of the Chunin Exams."

He simply nodded. I waited, but he didn't say another word. He'd turned his head back to stare at the ceiling.

"Naruto is lined up against Neji," I said, the words sounding like an offer. At that moment, I would have given anything to see him smile again. But if this interested Lee at all, he didn't show it.

"And Gaara?" he asked at last.

"Sasuke Uchiha," I all but whispered. He nodded again.

Lee was still on quite a lot of pain medication. It only took a few moments of silence for him to lapse back into unconsciousness. I stared down at him for a second longer. I felt… disappointed. I realized then that I'd really wanted to talk to Lee—the old Lee—about my problems… And I was immediately ashamed. Lee would not be in any condition to worry about anyone else's troubles for a long time.

I resolved then to live the way Lee would—to be the person he seemed to think I was. I couldn't keep running from my own memories just because I was afraid of what I might find. No. It was time for my own training to begin in earnest.

Review please!

I don't own Naruto!

This ended up being a longer one… The little adventure with Sakura in the middle came totally out of nowhere as I was writing the scene with Teuchi. I feel like I should have more to say here... But it is nearly 1 AM, and I am drained... I hope you enjoyed the chapter!