A good hour or two passed before Draco felt all cried out and was finally able to stop, and still Harry held him.

Quietly and gently.

Draco didn't pull away and let Harry hold him. He had said hurtful things, true things, but things that were still no less hurtful. He had meant what he said but he also didn't at the same time,"I'm not going to apologize." he said quietly, his voice was stuffed and hoarse from all the crying.

"You don't need to." Harry replied in a sullen sort of way. He fully understood why Draco had said the things he had, he knew the reasons, but he couldn't deny that the way he had said 'Potter' didn't sting him a bit. Hearing his last name used like that reminded him of the times they were sworn enemies. When they genuinely hated each other with all the passion they possessed. Those times had been easier, much simpler.

"You know that we shouldn't do this again." Draco put out the obvious statement, half of it trying to convince himself and the other half to tell Harry in the most direct way possible.

But he was in Harry's arms, he was with the person that he wanted to be with for the rest of his life, it was so hard to let him go again and for merlin's sake he was starting to sound like a pansy in one of those weekly witch dramas. How could he not feel that way though? How could he resist Harry? After being denied of any kind of correspondence for so long, this was the first time in years that they were finally meeting and it would be the last for as long as they lived.

Friends? Out of the question. The two individuals could never go back to those days. They were too in love and too attached to each other.

"I know." was all Harry said again. He could feel his heart turn cold and drop to his stomach, had he not been the one holding Draco, he probably would have started leaking tears of his own as well.

"Is that really all you can say?" Draco frowned and pulled away to look at Harry's face. His eyes were pink and swollen as well as the tip of his nose,"I just said that we can't ever see each other again and 'I know' is all you say?" his voice was soft and demanding but he had lost all the anger he had been silently harboring.

Brilliant green eyes looked into silver ones, barely visible in the darkness of Borgin & Burkes,"What am I supposed to say?" he wanted to know, his voice was almost desperate but not quite,"That I wish I could see you again?" he laughed harshly, his own throat beginning to strain with the tears he was holding back.

Draco was silent as he looked at Harry and then sighed,"What a pathetic sight we make up, you and I. Slytherin's prince and the saviour of the wizarding world locked in each other's arms and crying like bloody babies." he laughed softly,"Not quite how we imagined our long anticipated meeting to go is it?"

"No." Harry murmured and reached out a hand to cup the side of Draco's face and bring him in for a gentle kiss,"Not how I imagined it at all." his voice was a sigh as he let go of Draco and groped around him until he found his wand and lit the tip of it with a spell illuminating everything in the shop with a bright white light.

He and Draco squinted at the sudden brightness of it and once their eyes adjusted to the light, they looked at each other and started to laugh at their unsightly appearances. They looked like wild men, hair a mess, dust from the floor smeared on them, naked. But the laughter was cut short as they continued to look at each other.

This would be the last.

Silently the two men fumbled around on the floor for their belongings and began to redress themselves.

Theirs was a meeting that didn't have to happen. It wasn't supposed to happen.

Draco pulled on his white silk shirt and began to button up the pearl buttons from top to bottom. Fingers a little clumsy and stiff.

They should have just let the past go.

Harry dusted off his black robes and slid them over his collared shirt and reached for his pants.

Instead their feelings and selfishness for each other got in the way and made a bigger mess of things.

But how could they forget?

"How could we...how could I forget?" Harry asked stumbling over his words once they were both fully dressed. The two people now stood an arms length from each other coincidently separated by the countertop.

Draco bit the inside of his cheek,"Of course you can't forget me." he finally told Harry,"Why would you want to forget the best part of your life?" he attempted a cheeky smile but it came out as a grimace. No one could erase the memories from their minds, not unless someone performed a memory charm or something to that effect but that was besides the point, the point was that neither person wasnted to forget, they couldn't. They had been too tightly wound around and incorporated into each other's lives no matter how long they'd been apart.

The too white light from Harry's wand cast shadows around them and made the features of their faces stand out more. The bags underneath their eyes were more pronounced, lines that delicately webbed out from the corners of their eyes indicated signs of gradual aging.

They had both changed, and it was just now, that the realization was just starting to hit them in its entirety.

"There's no more to this, Harry." Draco said quietly and looked straight into his eyes. Strength of will, strength of character, tenacity, all of that could be see hidden in Draco's gaze and Harry found that he couldn't do or say anything in response.

Besides, hadn't he lost that right when he had made his decision years ago?

"I love you." Harry said instead, his gaze was steady and his tone was soft. He understood that this was goodbye, the final and proper goodbye. It couldn't be changed, decisions had been made and it was too late to change them, their present and future had already been built upon them.

"I love you." Draco replied and although his voice was soft, there was a hidden intensity that shone for a brief moment before fading into a dullness that faded. He walked around the countertop and pressed himself into Harry's chest wrapping his arms around his neck to kiss him, because after this...after this...his thoughts trailed off as his eyes closed and he let himself get lost in it.

Harry reached a hand up to the back of Draco's neck to bring him closer deepening the kiss. The last kiss, he thought to himself wryly, what a dramatic end. His thoughts were sarcastic even in this situation.

Soft, slow, warm.

The two people slowly broke away breathing hard. Any longer and things would start to progress like it had the first time and that was something they had to stop.

Their time was over.

Harry opened his mouth to ssay something but Draco interrupted him,"I wish we could just pretend..." his voice trailed off and he looked down unsure of what he was going to say, by the gods, here he was, a fully grown male adult, saying things as if he were a young girl, and yet here he was thinking.

I wish we could pretend that we didn't have a family, that we were together, that nothing was wrong, that we would get our true happy ending.

There was silence and then suddenly Harry's voice tumbled out through his lips forming words that even he was surprised to hear himself say,"Let's just pretend then."

Draco looked up at him for a moment after a split second of surprise and then his face broke out into a slight smile,"Just pretend." he repeated.

Let's just pretend.

What a laugh, what a joke, what a riot.

What were they? School girls? Little kids skipping off into some dreamland with unicorns?

It amazed him how immature and naive he could be even as a grown man. Such thoughts...

The two people stood in front of each other in silence unwilling to move. All they wanted was each other and all they wanted was to be happy together but they were far too past that point and now the only thing they could do to make it easier on themselves was to just drop it and move on.

"Let's just pretend." Draco repeated again, his voice was fading as he turned around unwillingly. There was a bone aching sadness that was starting to pound within him and he knew that it would take years for it to fade even a little bit. If he had any tears left, he would be shedding them right now but he had cried them all out earlier.

Illusion. The word was an illusion. It was a fake. A bloody hollow hope. But it was something.

Harry shut his eyes against the pain and then opened them letting the light on the tip of his wand fade away quietly into darkness,"Yea." he breathed out and then opened his eyes to find that Draco was gone. He had walked away.

It had taken too many years to end it.

Draco briskly walked down the dark twisting corridors hands in his pockets. He had been away from home too long and he needed to hurry back. But as he kept walking the hollow feeling inside his chest seemed to grow, the words, let's just pretend kept repeating in his mind,"Bloody stupid." he muttered to himself as he came to a stop and leaned against the stone wall he was standing next to suddenly feeling weary.

Night had fallen long ago it seemed, the sky was clear and yet the stars couldn't be seen although the moon was bright. There were no people milling about in this area since it was secluded not to mention that it was late and most of the shops were closed for the night.

They would move on. Only a thread connecting their past to the present and then to the future as they continued to live. Memories would never be forgotten and their feelings for each other would never fade but they had other people in their lives, the people they owed loyalty, duty, and love to.

Harry quietly pushed the door of the shop and stepped out into the night. The door clunked shut behind him as he stood there almost at a loss. He realized that without Malfoy, without Draco shadowing his life and thoughts, he felt unachored to life. As if he was just floating around somewhere in the air.

A gentle breeze slithered through the stone alleyways and whooshed past him as he began to walk away from Borgin & Burkes. He had a life to get back to, a family to take care of, obligations to meet.

If only he could go back to that time, his footsteps echoed in the stone surroundings as he walked, if only he could have done things differently. Then he could have offered something better to Draco, he could have said something better than the words, 'let's just pretend.'

Pretend what though? Pretend it never happened? Pretend that they were still going to be together one day? Pretend that they had a choice?

But it was done and now there was no point in thinking too much about it. Both people had made their choices and were now walking further and further away from each other. It had been a pointless meeting. The only thing that seemed to have happened was the reopening of old wounds, wounds that had already healed and now it would take so much longer for them to recover.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Flashback. Hogwarts.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Harry grumbled under his breath in an unbecoming way as he rolled over onto his back trying to get into a comfortable position on his bed. He was sulking, his lower lip jutting out into a little pout and his eyes narrowed into a slight glare. It had been the first time they had fought since dating and he had never been so stressed in his life.

He didn't know if he should be mad at Draco or just pretend that he hadn't seen anything. It couldn't have been a big deal anyway. Right?

Just then the door to the room busted open and in came Draco walking airily, a smile on his face as if the fight before hadn't happened. When he saw Harry roll over onto his side to avoid looking at him, he frowned and paused for a moment before throwing his book bag onto his bed and then made his way to Harry,"Don't tell me that you're still sulking about that." he climbed onto the bed and sat there cross legged staring at his back.

"I don't know what you're talking about." came the stiff reply. Harry crossed his arms over his chest and made a resolution to stare at the wall in front of him. Don't give in to the temptation, he told himself, don't look at Draco. He would resist this time, oh yes, he would resist.

Draco laughed and reached over to roll Harry onto his back but the Gryffindor resisted and refused to budge. Exasperated, Draco leaned over him to look at his face but Harry shut his eyes to avoid the confrontation.

"Oh for Merlin's sake Harry." Draco huffed stifling a laugh and sat back down,"I already told you it was nothing." he reached out and rested a hand on Harry's arm,"Accidents happen all the time."

"An accident?" Harry finally couldn't take it anymore and sat up, turning to face Draco,"She was smogging you!" he snapped,"No one trips over nothing and lands on your face to give you a wet one!" he frowned at the laughing blond man sitting in front of him,"I'm so glad to see that you're having a good time of it." he muttered and was about to lie back down and sulk some more when Draco's hand shot out and grabbed him.

"Don't be silly Potter." he grinned and kissed Harry on the mouth,"Jealousy doesn't become you." he kissed him again.

"Who says anyone is jealous?" Harry mumbled as he pulled Draco into his arms possessively.

The Slytherin student laughed and kissed the Gryffindor student lightly on the neck,"Whatever you say." he wrapped his arms around Harry affectionately,"If you're still mad about that, just pretend you didn't see anything." he suggested lightly.

"I couldn't do that even if I tried." Harry growled, his arms tightened around Draco's waist.

Later that night as the two people lay side by side on the beds that they had pushed together some time before, Draco turned over onto his side to look at Harry's profile. The lights were off and so they were lying in darkness, the curtains were drawn over the window so moonlight couldn't get in.

"Hey Harry." Draco's voice was quiet and serious, signs that he had been thinking about something a lot.

"What is it?" Harry opened his eyes and turned his head to look at Draco. In moments like these, he knew that Draco would be revealing some thought to him that he had been cautiously thinking about by himself unable to share it with Harry until he felt ready.

"What if we never end up together after this?" Draco asked,"What if something happens and for some reason we end up just going different ways and marry different people?" his tone was heavy, an indication that he had been thinking seriously about this matter for days.

Harry paused for a moment not expecting the question,"What brought this on all of a sudden?" he asked shifting his body so that he had an arm over Draco's body pulling him close. It wasn't like Draco to think of things like this, he was a surprisingly optomistic boy when it came to their relationship.

"Just answer the question Harry." Draco said impatiently as he snuggled in closer to the Gryffindor student.

"Then I suppose..." Harry struggled to think of a decent answer,"I suppose that's that then." he ended lamely.

Draco snorted,"I should have figured that you wouldn't answer properly." expecting Harry to say something that would somehow appease him had been too much of an expectation apparently.

"Don't be so rude." Harry frowned into the darkness and absently ran his fingers through Draco's hair. He didn't know what Malfoy put in his hair to make it so soft, but by the gods did it feel good, it was starting to put him to sleep,"Draco, if that happens, then nothing can change it." his voice was husky,"Just remember the times we were together, remember the memories we made, remember me. I'll always love you." he murmured,"No matter what."

Draco felt himself relax into Harry's warm arms. The answer he had been expecting was that they'd always be together. No matter what. Not this realistic rubbish. But then again, Harry was a realist and unable to lie to people he cared about.

"I love you." Draco mumbled shyly into Harry's chest and then closed his eyes to sleep. He would do anything to keep this moment forever, to keep this relationship forever, and he had a feeling, a good feeling that they would be together in the end.

"I love you too." Harry replied drowsily. What was the problem? They would be together forever. Problem solved.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Present

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

That was the issue, Harry thought standing still. He was thrown into a mess of hope and illusion, none of which was relevant right now because, he realized, he was still clinging onto the future that he would never have with Draco.

It was like he was subconsciously telling himself to pretend that he and Draco would still have a relationship. That there was something left for the both of them when in fact, there was nothing.

Delusions. It was scary how your worst enemy could turn out to be yourself at the worst times, Harry let out a sigh and pushed himself to take one step after another, he had to keep moving forward.

-.-.-.-.-.-.

Pretend.

Draco felt a bitter smile forming on his face as he made himself stand up straight and continue walking.

Why the blood hell not?

What was there for him to lose now?

-.-.-.-.-.-.

End

*Hope you guys enjoyed it. It's literally been years since I started this story and I'm sorry for the people I let down.

But yes, this is the end of the story. I had a hard time with this chapter trying to portray accurately the things I wanted to and for some it may come as awkward. But it's the way it is.

Comments are appreciated, and for those of you who have left a comment, thank you very much :) It's made me very happy.