Glee Disclaimer: The Glee characters belong to Fox. This is just for fun.

Mark Salling: I'm almost as infatuated with you as you are with disc golf. The glee tour thing is making me LAUGH. BUT, anything that puts shirtless photos of you on the net, I'm practically a cheerleader for!

Author's Note: Thank you, readers. You are awesome and supportive and enthusiastic for the story when I need you. The end is getting messy, and I had planned to end it with the trip to Lima, but… I may not. Regardless, it sounds like a sequel is in the works! (Although I may attempt, for the first time ever, to write two stories at once because I have an idea that is EATING away at my brain!) THANKS SO MUCH to the reviewers! No, really, you have no idea how much I appreciate it!

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Puck woke up grumpy after getting kicked all night by David when he was expecting to be curled up with Rachel. He shuffled to the kitchen to make some pancakes for the kids. Rachel wasn't a fan of bacon, but he was definitely going to need some this morning. He was surprised to find Rachel and Courtney cuddling on the couch, watching cartoons in whispered voices.

"Uncle Puck!" exclaimed Courtney, holding her arms out to be scooped up. That little smile was enough to chase away most of his rotten mood, and he grinned at her.

"Princess Courtney! Princess Rachel! How are the two most beautiful princesses I know?" He kissed Courtney's cheek and squeezed her tightly, making her giggle.

"Rachel's not a princess!"

"Au contraire, my dear Princess Courtney, she's as much my princess as are you!"

Rachel smiled at him. He leaned down to kiss her cheek. "Mornin' I missed you last night."

Her eyes twinkled at him. "I missed you too."

He was sure she didn't purposely lick her lips just then, but it made him go half hard just watching that. Damn Nana rules. He scowled again and set Courtney down, returning her to the couch to be with Rachel. "Uncle Puck's making pancakes and bacon."

Rachel set her mouth in that disapproving line. He ignored it. He couldn't have his sex fix, he needed something to get him through the day.

David woke up just then and literally bounced into the kitchen.

"Uncle Puck, you're cooking? My mom always cooks at my house. At least she did before…" His voice trailed off in a worrisome tone that was unnatural for a four-year-old.

"Uncle Puck is a great cook, and I'm not much of one, I'm afraid." Rachel inserted, pulling David to the couch with Courtney and her.

"Oh, well, at least you're good at Candy Land."

"Yes, there's that." She smiled.

Puck made Mickey Mouse shaped pancakes that had the kids oohing and ahhing over his skills. He grinned and they all enjoyed breakfast. Rachel packed their things after they got dressed and offered to stay back and clean up while Puck returned the kids to their own house.

He held her eyes for a moment. "You'll be here when I get back, right?"

"Yes, I should be. I don't have any other plans for today."

He shook his head at her. "Not 'I should be.' I will be. I will definitely be here waiting for you."

She laughed, but he made her promise and sealed it with a lustful kiss.

Puck drove the kids back to the suburbs as quickly as he dared. Saturday morning traffic wasn't too bad, and he got there in great time. After the kids went tearing into the house to see their mom, Mark and he unloaded their stuff from his car, Mark thanking him profusely.

"So… was everything alright?" Mark asked. "Was David naughty?"

"What?" Puck shook his head. "No, he was great. They both were."

"Then why do you keep scowling at my son like he took your last bowl of ice cream."

Puck started to deny it, and then took a deep breath. "Cuz he did! Little fucker wouldn't let Rachel sleep with me!"

"What?" shouted Mark, breaking into hysterical laughter. "How did that happen?"

"He told us his nana says only married people can sleep together. He wouldn't let me. He thought it might upset his mom."

Mark tried to comment between fits of laughter, but it was very difficult and took him several minutes to get it all out.

"Sorry, Puck. Who knew the kid could cockblock you? I had no idea my mom still held a grudge."

"What do you mean? You think she set it up?"

"Oh, yeah, she did. She knew you two were living together, and she knew they were going to your place last night. She must have had a long talk with him when she watched the kids earlier this week. She never really got over you turfing the lawn in college that one time."

"What? It was an accident! I was driving your drunk ass home! She should be grateful!"

"I know, but she never really saw it that way. Mostly she couldn't stand that you had corrupted her little boy and turned him into a drunk college kid!"

"That was like 8 years ago. I've grown up. Jesus. She can't still be mad about that!"

"Oh, she can and probably is. Jewish mothers don't have the market cornered on crazy, you know. Catholic mothers are pretty evil themselves. I'm sure she said a rosary or two over our friendship."

Puck left shortly after that. He popped in quickly to see Karen, but he could see how run-down she was, so he just said hello and left again quickly, promising to bring Rachel along next time. On his way home, the cell rang. He looked to see that it was Rachel and hoped nothing came up to prevent her from being home for sex.

"Rachel?"

"Noah," she purred into the phone. "How much longer before you're home?"

"Not too long. Like ten minutes tops. Why?"

"I'm just lying here in our bed, naked, and restless. I don't know how much longer I can take this waiting."

His dick went rock hard in seconds, and his grip on the steering wheel tightened. "Babe, I'll be there in a few minutes. Don't get out of that bed."

"Why? What are you going to do with me?"

He looked around the road carefully and took a deep breath.

"First, I'm going to kiss you. I'm going to put my mouth to yours and press my tongue into your sweet little mouth."

She pouted a little. "I could have had that last night."

"Then, I'm going to put my hand to your breasts and tease them, whirling and kissing the tiny pink nipples. If you moan in response, I'll know you want me to pinch them."

She moaned then, into the phone, and his dick went to stone. Seriously. He stretched and readjusted carefully, looking around at the traffic around him.

"What else are you going to do to me, Noah? What will come next?" The thing was, she was an actress. She knew exactly how to affect a sultry voice and where to insert the innuendoes as she spoke. Her voice was practically purring, and it had directly affected his dick.

"Damn, Rach. You're gonna cause an accident."

She clicked her disapproval into the phone, and he answered.

"Then I'm going to reach between your legs. I'm going to feel your soft pussy lips and stroke them lightly with my fingers. They're already going to be soaking wet for me, showing me how hot you are for me. Are you hot for me already, Rachel?"

"Mmmmmm-mmmmm. So wet. So hot."

Christ. He missed the turn. He'd have to pick it up on the next block.

"Then I'm going to graze over your clit, just feather light touches to it. When you start panting, I'll just insert one finger into your tight little hole. I'll stroke it in and out of you- increasing my pace feverishly. When you come, you'll tighten up on me and cry out with my name. As you're coming down from that first orgasm, I'll add another finger. This time I'll hook it to hit the back of your g-spot. Then my tongue will start its work. First I'll just push your clit with my tongue, back and forth. Then I'll suck it in tight and wet and warm, continuing to work my fingers in and out of you."

"Noah," came the cry from the other end of the phone.

He threw the car into park and shot out of it, running through the door to the elevator.

"I'm almost there, Rach. Are you?"

"Oh, Noah, oh, yes. Come. Here. Now. Please."

The elevator had never taken so long in his life. He was frantic to get to his apartment. This was painful and hot, his head was swimming and the phone was to his ear still.

"Wait for me, Rach. I'm almost there. Just wait for me."

"Noah, I'm naked and waiting for you. Wet and ready in your bed. In our bed."

He threw the door open, mentally reminding himself to talk to her about that later. (Seriously? Who doesn't lock the door in Chicago?) His clothes were being removed and thrown around the apartment as he got to the bedroom naked. She saw him and climbed up the bed to reach for him. His lips found hers in a feverish pace, ready to make good on his promises to her. When she reached for his cock, he shoved her hand away, not willing to risk it.

Later, when they were exhausted and sweaty in their bed, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her eyelids.

"You are amazingly hot, Rachel Berry. I can't believe you tortured me like that on the phone."

"I can't believe you did exactly what you said you would to me." She stretched and pulled her body in tighter to him.

"Yeah, and, about the door. You have to lock it you know. This isn't Lima."

"I totally will- except when I'm waiting for you to have hot, nasty sex with me in the next ten minutes."

He pretended to consider it. "Deal."

"Noah, I have to tell you how amazing it was to see you with David and Courtney again."

He scowled. "Rachel, I got cock-blocked by a four-year-old."

"I know, but you did the right thing for a little boy who was scared for his mama. That is amazing, and it made me realize that I have completely fallen for you. I love you, Noah Puckerman. You are an incredible guy."

"Finally. I guess that's worth getting cock-blocked over. I love you too, Rachel."

This time, they made love tenderly and sweetly, not like the hot sex from earlier at all. Puck kept whispering in her ear how amazing she was and how much he loved her. Her neck was a soft, sweet oasis of kissing.

After they showered (separately), and Puck had picked up some take-out, they ate on the couch in sweats.

"Seriously, you think Mark's mom did it on purpose?"

"I don't even think it so much as know it. So does Mark. The woman totally hates me. She just can't get over this one little incident in college…"

He told her the story that left her in stitches. She couldn't believe that the Puck from high school had actually gotten worse before he became the Noah she'd fallen in love with.

"Don't forget that we're going to Lima next weekend for Father's Day."

"How could I forget? We're coming out."

She giggled. "Coming out? Is that how you think of it? We're coming out to my gay dads?"

This time he laughed as well. It was a little ironic…

Author's Note: I think that there will be just one more chapter. And… you may get a glimpse of Jean in it!