Ways to Annoy Lord Voldemort

1. Follow him around humming the Imperial March from Star Wars… LOUDLY

2. Go into his room at three in the morning, wake him up and tell him to check your closet for the boogeyman. When he refuses, whine and argue that DUMBLEDORE would do it.

3. Make subtle remarks to him wanting Dumbledore's "wand"

4. Remind him that Harry is more afraid of mermaids, giant spiders, and nightmares about his dead friends than he is of Voldemort

5. Wonder aloud when Lady GaGa is going to start dressing like him for a concert.

6. Hide his wand and leave a regular stick in its place.

7. You can't spell Voldemort without EMO!

8. Kill Harry first.

9. Call him 'The-man-who-let-the-boy-live'.

10. Knit him an ugly sweater for Christmas. Insist he wear it.

11. Remind him that he kept a diary as a teenage boy.

Okay tis quite late and I must sleep. More on the way.