Chapter 35

New Year's Day

We apparated into a barren room with dusty wooden floors. The windows and only door were locked shut, the dim light coming from a flickering small candle had been left burning on a rickety table. The room had been prepared for my arrival.

"Aren't you worried about your friends?" I asked coldly.

"They're probably dead by now," he shrugged uncaring.

"Such strong comradery," I muttered.

"Shut up, Mudblood," he said, pushing me towards the only chair. I lost my balance and fell heavily onto it, making it wobble. With a flick of his wand he bound me to it with heavy rusted chains. Strangely my heart was steady and my mind clear of fear.

Bring it on, bastard, I thought.

He looked at me as if knowing what was passing through my mind. He took off his cloak and let it crumple to the floor.

"So let's start where we left off then," he murmured. "Crucio."

The pain returned, stronger and more unyelding than before. It seemed to be never ending, each second feeling like a minute.

Then it suddenly stopped.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"Not your fucking business," I breathed heavely. "Although it would be a question to ask before you kidnap someone not after."

"Don't be smart with me, Jemma De Angelis," he said pronouncing my name slowly for the first time. "You know what I meant – there is no record of you anywhere."

"Good."

"Why are you here in Britain?" he continued.

"I like gloomy, rainy weather," I replied.

He slapped me hard across the face. It stung.

"What is your purpose in the Order?"

"I say it again," I said slowly staring at him angrily. "It's not your fucking business!"

He sneered.

"Crucio."

Again, pain.

"I wonder why Gryffindors are so stubborn," he said lifting the curse once more.

"I was never sorted," I said weakly.

"It's clear what you are," he said with an evil smile, caressing my cheek.

A feeling of unease washed over me.

"I can see the appeal a woman like you has – pity you're not a Pureblood, otherwise..."

His cold fingers followed the line of my face, lingered on my lips, then trailed down my neck.

I shivered.

"Crucio," he repeated again softly.

I knew deep down that I could not hold out indefinitely. In the books Frank and Alice had been tortured to insanity – was I going down the same path?

The pain stopped and I opened my eyes.

Avery's face was level with mine.

"The more I stare at you screaming, the more I want to hurt you," he said.

"And what do you think it's going to achieve?" I replied disgusted, rage I had never felt before building steadily inside of me.

"I break you," he said simply, his eyes watching my reaction carefully.

"By all means continue then," I told him coldly.

He laughed heartily, shaking his head amused.

"You are brave and a fool," he murmured. I saw him waving his wand and the chains that were bounding me fell to the floor. I realised then how badly my entire body was shaking. I couldn't stand up even if I wanted to.

"Imperio," I heard him say and now recognised the bizarre brain feeling I had experienced earlier that night for what it really was.

"Who are you?" he asked once more.

And even through the fog I knew I had to resist, the pain had gone yet I was in terrible danger.

"No one."

"Crucio" His voice said.

And the fog was gone again and the pain was back. Unimaginable pain.

I was on the floor when the Cruciatus was lifted. He kicked me hard in the stomach. I could barely breathe.

"Does it hurt, Mudblood?" he asked with a laugh. "Have you had enough?"

It took all the strength I had to lift my head up and stare at him. I did not answer him.

"Do you know what will happen if I keep cursing you with the Cruciatus?" he asked me while helping me back onto the chair.

"Yes."

"Aren't you afraid?"

"No."

He stared at me hardly for a moment.

"Crucio," he said.

Pain returned. I screamed and screamed and screamed and I begged him to stop.

Avery was laughing and he was so unlike Sirius that I wondered how I could think of having seen any similarities between the two back at the Three Broomsticks. Pure hatred and anger seared through me. My mind almost reached the point of non return. He lifted the curse just in time.

And again I was numbed by the fog. I was back onto the floor and I could taste the dust in my mouth. I felt his hands lifting me up again and I recoiled.

"Don't touch me!" I yelled – my voice rough from all the screaming and pushed him away from me with all the strength and magic I had left. He lost his balance and fell backwards hitting the back of the chair. Although hurt, he managed to throw another Cruciatus at me which I could not avoid.

And the pain returned and it was breaking me and I wished for death...

Yet he lifted the curse again and pinned me down onto the floor underneath him. He knew I was too weak to fight back. He slapped me hard. Once. Twice. My ears were ringing.

"What would Black say if he could see us know?" he said with excitement.

"If Sirius was here you would be dead already," I mouthed.

"You think he would still want you even after I break you and your brain is fried?" he asked, his face a few inches from mine. "I guess Black is used to girls with no brains, he'd never notice the difference!"

I spat at him.

He slapped me again, laughing.

"You're one of a kind, Mudblood," he whispered. "I haven't had this much fun in months!"

I tried to push him off me but was too weak. His hands pinned mine back onto the floor. Then his mouth was kissing my neck, almost gently. I could feel him breathing in my scent.

"Do you think we should take a break and do it on a bed?" he asked.

As if I was going to answer, as if I didn't want to have my wand...

And that's when I saw it. My chestnut wand half hidden under Avery's cloak discarded on the floor.

"I'd take the Cruciatus over you any day," I said calmly.

Avery didn't like that. He let go of my hands and punched me in the stomach repeatedly. I had never felt so helpless and in pain, yet I knew I had to get to my wand. I had to, I could not let him do this to me any longer.

And that's what I did, my strenght returning the moment my fingers closed around the wand, Avery too distracted to notice.

"Stupefy," I breathed.

And his entire weight fell on top of me. I almost fainted.

Not now Jem.

I pushed him away and tried standing up slowly, my legs barely holding up. My head spinning, I kicked the bastard in the groin and ran to the door.

James and Lily.

I turned on the spot.

I managed the four knocks on their door then slumped into the rattan chair on their verandah. James opened the door and almost didn't notice me. I was a mess, sobbing and shaking uncontrollably.

"Jem, oh Merlin, what happened to you?" James exclaimed worried "Lily, please, fire-call Dumbledore! Jem's here!"

They both helped me up and took me to Sirius's room on the upper floor. The lump in my throat got even bigger when I saw a pile of his clothes in the corner. How was he? Had he been enduring torture for more than a month without giving out the secret? I had barely gone through it for a few hours and felt mentally and physically about to collapse from sheer exhaustion.

James stood near the door, looking dejected while Lily sat beside me on the bed.

"James, I've got it," Lily said quietly at her husband, "Would you mind making us some tea, please?"

"Sure, no problem," he sighed, closing the door quietly.

Lily gave me that look, that look I knew meant she wanted me to talk. Talking was at that point the thing I least wanted to do.

"I just want a hot shower right now, Lily" I said calmly.

"But -"

"No buts," I interrupted her. "Please give me half an hour."

She nodded, not that she had any other choice. I was clearly coming off the effects of the Cruciatus. Any idiot would have guessed what had happened to me.

I spent more time than I needed under the steamy jet of water, sitting on the tiled floor and letting the water wash away the pain and the humiliation. They had tricked me and I had fallen into their trap like an imbecile. What a joke I was. I was meant to be good at magic but was entirely inexperienced in the real world. If this was the exam at the end of Snape's class, I would have failed badly.

I turned the water off and picked up a towel from the rack.

I returned to the bedroom dressed in Lily's pajamas, my hair still wet. Lily was sitting on the bed, her hands gripping onto the quilt.

"Jem, please tell me what happened. You'll feel better after, trust me."

And so I told her. Slowly, painfully and with enormous shame I recounted the night and the torture. I felt weak and terribly guilty and...

"Jemma," Lily said fiercily "Not many would have endured what you've gone through tonight and kept their sanity. What that filthy bastard tried to do to you -" she was lost for words.

"I felt straight into his trap like some cheap – as if Sirius didn't matter -"

Lily hugged me tightly.

"Please don't tell James," I pleaded holding back tears.

"I won't, I promised I wouldn't." Lily said.

I woke up late that morning with a thumping headache and muscle pain all over my body. I struggled to get up and slowly, painfully forced myself down the stairs.

Lily and James were at the kitchen table with Remus. They all looked at me with the same sad little smile while I sat down.

"Coffee, Jem?" James asked.

"Yep, that'd be great, James," I said gratefully while picking up a chocolate biscuit from the plate on the table. He waved his wand at one of the cups – it had a black dog pictured on it - and filled it with hot steaming brew.

"Thanks," I said taking the cup. Coffee smelt wonderful.

I took a couple of sips then put the cup down. My eyes staring at my left wrist.

"I've lost the bracelet." I said, a hint of panic in my voice.

James and Remus looked at me questioningly.

"Sirius's bracelet?" Lily asked.

I nodded slowly, my mind racing.

"We have to leave this house immediately," I said frantically, my voice urgent.

"Why?" They all said in unison.

"They wanted to kidnap me to force Sirius to talk," I said quickly. "They have the bracelet and quite possibly some of my hair – they can easily polyjuice a random victim to look like me -"

"And trick Sirius into giving up the secret," Lily said calmly.

All three of them were very calm, too calm in fact.

"We have to get out of here!" I stood up and stared at them in disbelief. Why weren't they reacting to this?

"We're not going anywhere, Jem," James said. "We're done running and we're done hiding. We fight."

"And Harry?" I questioned.

"He's at Hogwarts," Lily smiled. "We've already thought all of this through, James took him there early this morning."

"Ok." I said sitting down again and picked up my cup of coffee. If I had to face the psycho then I had better be awake.

"You're not going to fight us on this?" Remus chuckled.

"I'm thoroughly past that, Remus," I said with a shrug.

All three of them smiled at me. They felt the same. The emotional upheaval had gone on for way too long.

"You're not going to hold it against Sirius, or me for that matter, if he breaks the Fidelius?" I asked James after awhile.

"If we all get out of it alive miracolously... nah, I won't," said James lightly. "After all he's been through since November he deserves a bit of slack."

"Aren't you jealous he may actually prefer me over you?" I continued sarcastically.

Remus and Lily laughed.

"I'm heartbroken," he replied with a grin. "But because of you I won 30 Galleons, so I can't complain, can I?