Just a bit of Angst. Interpret it anyway you want.

Thanks to the usual people. xoxo

Breathe in and breathe out.

Gillian felt her chest tighten as she looked at the calendar on her desk. The bold numbers stared back at her, mocking her as she was once again reminded of the consequences of her decisions.

She had to remember to breathe.

She needed to remember that the date would soon pass.

She needed to remember that the crippling numbness that wrapped itself around her would subside, and return to the familiar dull ache which she had become an expert at masking.

Breathe in and breathe out. Move on and break down.

She was strong; so much stronger than she looked. To her friends she was a pillar of strength; always there to help, to guide, to support, never wavering in her loyalties even when taken for granted. No one knew what she kept buried deep inside hidden from the world.

Gillian felt her hands begin to tremble as the unmistakable feeling of regret settled heavy in her chest. She clamped her eyes shut as she willed the tears away.

Breathe in and breathe out.

Cal entered her office, but stopped suddenly when he saw her sitting at her desk. He watched her for a moment as silent tears trailed down her cheeks. He could tell that she was trying to compose herself. He watched her shoulders shake as a battle raged inside her, her tiny frame rigid as she struggled to maintain control.

Hold on hold tight, make it through another night.

He moved towards her without a second thought, and stood beside her. Cal turned her chair so she was facing him. He moved his hand to her tear stained face and gently cupped her cheek. Searching her face he waited until her eyes slowly opened.

Cal felt his heart shatter as he was met by her glassy gaze. She looked so small and fragile as he stared down at her.

Breathe in and breathe out.

Gillian could feel him even before he made his presence known. Leaning into his touch as he gently caressed her cheek, she greedily took what little comfort he offered her. She felt his thumb gently brush away her tears, and knew know words were needed; they never were with him.

Gillian watched as he shifted in front of her. His eyes never left hers as he pulled her to her feet and wrapped his strong arms around her small frame. She allowed herself to fall apart in his arms as she buried her face into his neck. She was silent as he effortlessly lifted her into his arms and carried her to the couch before he placed her on his lap.

"I've got you, love," he whispered softly.

Cal could feel her nails claw at his shirt and he stroked her back softly in an attempt to calm her breathing. He held her to his chest and brushed the stray strands from her face before gently placing a kiss to her forehead.

'She didn't deserve this', he thought sadly.

Cal knew he was too selfish to ever let her go.

He knew she would never leave him. No matter how hard he pushed her, she would always be by his side and he would always be by hers.

He knew that she hid behind her smile.

He knew he couldn't say anything to take away the pain she was feeling.

All he could do was remind her to keep breathing, and hope that one day the pain would fade.

Comments and reviews always appreciated. Constructive or otherwise.