Disclaimer: the characters and all that of both Fairy Tail and Slayers do not belong to me, unless they're OCs of mine (unlikely) or I run into a lot of money tomorrow. Hint hint, nudge nudge.

I saw the frankly shameful lack of any Slayers X Fairy Tail crossovers and I felt deeply wounded. No, I felt offended. No, I felt both wounded and offended, offensively wounded if you will. And as such, I have decided to remedy this by forging the first one on this site, in the hopes that it will foster more.

All you need do is read, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy and review. Follow all these steps precisely and we'll all get to without having irate authors hunting you down and forcing you to write a review...err, not that I would ever do that, of course.

Continue, and enjoy!

Oh, and please review. Reviews make me feel warm and fuzzy inside.

SlayersXFairyTail

Some people have the patience of saints. Some are simply good tempered. Others are meek. But our story concerns someone who is none of these, someone who could drive saints to tears through sheer stubbornness, who's temper could be roughly, and accurately, compared unfavourably to a poorly designed explosive. Someone to who shouting and demands were a natural, perfectly normal method of communication, even with friends and people who might be more than friends. Especially with a person who might be more than a friend.

Hence, it is perfectly reasonable to come upon the focus of this story in the middle of setting fire to a poor, innocent, entirely blameless band of hapless bloodthirsty bandits.

For the slow among us, the main character is one Lina Inverse, self-proclaimed gorgeous sorceress extraordinaire, widely proclaimed Enemy-of-All-Who-Live and a collection of other rage inducing titles. Despite the less than...complimentary reputation she held, and a number of personality flaws that ranged from gluttony, penny-pinching and sheer pettiness to arrogance and breast-envy (not that she'd ever admit it), Lina Inverse has actually saved the world several times. Although to be fair she did once risk reducing the totality of existence to nothingness for one man, but that worked out well, so no harm done. She has her flaws, but flaws are what makes hero(ine)s great, right?

"Burn! Burn! BUUUURRRN! MWUAHAHAHAHA!"

...um.

Moving swiftly on, now that it has been established that Lina was doing her best to heroically liberate the stolen goods of the innocent from a bunch of villainous, heartless bandits-

"My skin! My skin is boiling off!"

"No! My life's work of carefully carved artist wooden statues!"

"My lungs are on fire, my lungs are on chablagack!"

"My leg!"

"My poor daughter, I'm sorry my flesh was burnt off before I could get the gold to pay for your operation! Goodbye cruel wor-"

Cough, cough.

...sigh

Ok, skipping right ahead to a now largely demolished bandit camp, Lina was striding through the mess confidently. Her eyes roved, searching for anything she might have missed on the first several lootings. Behind her a large sack, bulging gold, jewels and various other valuable wheezed and a male voice asked "Lina, don't you have enough now?"

Lina didn't even look back when she replied, "Stop whining Gourry. Be a man and tough it out." She dismissed his opinion with a lazy wave of the hand not going through an old sack in search of valuables.

"But I'm hungry. And Amelia and Zel are waiting for us." Gourry pointed out, and would have gone on had Lina not yelped and let go of whatever she was pulling out of the sack. Dropping his burden, the swordsman was at Lina's side before you could blink. "What happened, you okay?"

Pulling off her glove, lest it be further stained, Lina stuck her finger in her mouth and sucked at the wound. She didn't answer, preoccupied with sucking on her finger. Which meant she completely missed the fact Gourry's face went a hilarious shade of red and couldn't take his eyes from her finger and mouth.

She mumbled nonsensically, seemingly unaware that a full mouth wasn't conductive to conversation. Which, after years of meals which rarely went without a mouth and throat stuffed to capacity, you'd think she'd know by now. Satisfied with the lack of continued blood flow, Lina removed her finger and dedicated both hands to pulling, carefully, whatever had cut her from the sack. Unnoticed, Gourry's face had gone back to something approaching its usual colour.

Grumbling under her breath, Lina finally managed to free the object. Glinting in a remarkably sinister fashion for an inanimate object, although the drops of blood staining one of its edges added to it, she held a multifaceted gem of many colours. Fist sized, it was fitted into a pure gold coin and each colour was separated by a thin, crack-like line of gold. Seven flat edges led up to a point on both sides.

Both stared at the impressive item, Lina practically drooling at the sight of it. On one level, this was simply due to the sheer value of such an item. On another, it was the aura of magical power that permeated it. There were few things that could capture her attention like a valuable, mysterious piece of jewellery throbbing with arcane might and secrets, and one of those things was standing next to her looking at it too.

"Wow. What is it?" Gourry asked, certain he should be impressed but not entirely sure why.

Lina didn't take her gaze from it, as if trying it divine its powers through sheer willpower. "I'm...not sure." Her voice was cautious, but completely serious. "Its got some strong enchantments on, no wait, in it." She bit her lip, unsure what she was seeing. A sorceress of great power and a loot-monkey, Lina was skilled at comprehending magical objects, if only because they sold for more if you knew what they did.

This strange item didn't just glow with a single type of magic, as most did. Imbuing one item with multiple types of magic was tricky, not to mention dangerous, and if she was right this thing had the marking of Black and Holy Magic. That should normally be impossible, not least because there were no users of Holy magic left in the lands once sealed beneath the Mazoku barrier.

"How did bandits get something like this? It must be really old." The redhead muttered to herself. That was the only explanation she thought was likely. The only users of Black Magic in the Outer World were sorcerers travelling from the Inner World and Mazoku, but the only users if Holy Magic were in the Outer World. "Unless it was made recently, but what Dragon would help a user of Black Magic?" she thought aloud, pondering it.

Backing away, Gourry decided this was something best left to Lina. She didn't seem about to hurt herself, and it was obviously something magical if she her absently spoken words were true. Shrugging it off as something he wouldn't understand, the swordsman began walking back to the fallen sack of goods.

Frowning, Lina looked up and saw her partner moving away. Glancing at her find again, she decided to leave until they got back to the inn. Besides, Amelia and Zelgadis should be back by the time they reached the village and both could help with unravelling this mystery. Still, Lina was reluctant to put it away, staring into the many facets as she walked.

Which, in the remains of a formerly populous bandit camp, strewn with debris, was not a totally brilliant idea. Not watching where she was walking, Lina's foot was the vicious victim of a root that had seen the world above ground for the first time in its life and was just leaping for joy, leaving an unfortunate space in which a foot could get caught.

...ok, it was a non-magic, non-sentient root of a non-magic, non-sentient tree so that didn't really happen. But the facts remain, there was space for a foot to get caught and Lina's did exactly that!

Yelping, Lina's arms wheeled about for that precious second when you realise you're falling but can do nothing to stop it. In her surprise, Lina's grip on the jewel loosened a tad too much and it went flying. Spinning at the sound of Lina's yelp, Gourry's finely honed reflexes prevent the jewel from just smacking him in the face. Without consciously thinking about it his hand shot up and caught it inches from his face.

Ignoring the prick of pain from where his finger had cut itself on the tip of the jewel, unknown to him as the same place Lina cut herself earlier, he ran back to check on her.

Growling angrily, Lina battered away Gourry's offered hand pulled herself up. "I'm fine, just tripped. Who the hell puts roots in place like this, stupid trees." Moving past her irrational anger at trees and their irresponsible placement of vital growths, Lina noticed the wound on Gourry's thump. It wasn't very large, and an outsider observer might notice that one would have be paying very particular attention to Gourry's wellbeing to see it. Of course, said outside observer would require immunity to a number of magic attacks, fire, lighting and Lina's short sword if they wanted to share this without being reclassified as a corpse.

Conveniently, the outside observer was, or close enough. It was up for debate whether he could be classified as living anyway, at least according to one draconic purveyor of pottery and maces. He certainly wasn't about to share. It was, after all, a secret.

But there isn't an outside observer, so it wasn't. Obviously.

"What happened to your hand?" Lina asked to distract Gourry, completely unaware of any totally hypothetical outside observers that really didn't exist. Honest.

Blinking at her in confusion, the swordsman lifted his hand and stared at it for a moment. He took a deep breath, as thought preparing to speak. Then he closed his mouth and continued to ponder this mystery.

"I think" He said, in a voice that conveyed the utter certainty he felt. "I'm bleeding."

Rubbing her fist, Lina scowled at Gourry, his face imbedded in the dirt. "Are you trying to annoy me, Jelly-fish Brain?" she growled menacingly. "Why are you bleeding is what I meant. Obviously!"

Back on his feet, Gourry rubbed his chin thoughtfully, throwing up and catching the jewel absentmindedly as he thought. When Lina made a vague choking sound, he glanced at her curiously. "Something wrong?"

Her expression of terminal aggravation slowly draining away, the sorceress snatched the jewel away. "How could you not notice! You must have cut yourself when you caught this!" Lina shoved it in his face, pointing at the spot where their blood mingled. "Honestly, some days I doubt whether you actually use your brain. No one can be this-"

Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, the world would never discover exactly what Line thought no one could be that of. Distracted by her partner's idiocy, Lina hadn't noticed the subtle build up of magical energy until the last moment, and Gourry hadn't the slightest clue where magic items were concerned.

Beams of multicoloured light burst from the jewel, held between their faces. Both had time for expressions of surprise to cover their faces before the light became overwhelming and they faded from the world, both in terms of going from conscious to unconscious and in a far more literal way.

Someone prone to paranoia or delusions might think that an outside observer dropped down after the light had faded. They might speculate that this non-existent being would poke the jewel, sitting in the dirt, with his staff and make sounds vaguely of surprise. Some may even go so far as to claim this fictional fellow would attempt to pick up the object only to force away by a wave of Holy Magic.

But none would guess that he would say "Hmm, unexpected."

After all, he really didn't exist.

SlayersXFairyTail

Charging through the halls, wreathed in flames, Natsu couldn't help but silently complain about the quality of Dark Guilds recently. After Oracion Seis, these little bandits of Dark Guilds hiding in empty castle, manors and dungeons really just didn't seem such a threat. Punching one through a door, charring a group with a roar of fire and kicking another into the wall, Natsu just hoped he wouldn't lose his touch from dealing with amateurs like this.

Elsewhere in the extremely cliché abandoned manor the Dark Guild 'Scarecrow Parliament', similar lines of thought were being followed by Erza Scarlet and Gray Fullbuster. In an unsportsman-like show of not being a team player, Lucy Heartfillia was just thinking about not getting hit by any wayward attacks as Sagittarius dealt with the mages in her area. To be fair, Sagittarius was an excellent shot. Hell, he could give Bisca and Alzack, Fairy Tail's best sharpshooters, lessons. It was the enemy mages who were the problem, having few compunctions against attempting to fry, vaporise, boil, freeze, smash or otherwise destroy the girl who summoned the weirdo in the horse costume.

The reward for dealing with this group had been too good for them to pass up, specially when Lucy noted that it meant the rest of the team could go crazy since there was nothing for them to pay for repairing. People cared far less about the mouldy bases of Dark Guilds then they did, oh, picking totally at random, surprisingly flammable opera houses.

"Moshi moshi, I believe that was the last of them, Lucy-san." The Celestial Spirit said to his summoner. "Shall we move onto the next room?"

Peeking around the corners, Lucy was fairly certain they had gotten everyone in their area. "That's alright, I think that's the lot. We better meet the others in the centre. I'm sure they'll be done ages ago." She smiled at her spirit as they made their way to the middle of the manor, where each of their areas intersected. "Thanks for your help, none of them got close."

Sagittarius gave a half bow in recognition of the praise. "Moshi moshi, not a problem. They really weren't much to deal with."

"You're tellin' me!"

Lucy and her Spirit looked up, following the voice to its source. Leaning against the corner further from them, Natsu grinned at them.

"Aye!"

The Dragon Slayer's partner announced his presence loudly as well. Happy to see them both alive and well, not that she had really been worried, Lucy returned their happy expressions.

"You got all yours Lucy?" Natsu asked curiously, sniffing the air before grinning again, even wider. "Nice work."

"Psht, it was Sagittarius who did it, not me." Lucy waved away the praise, indicating the large man next to her. "And yes, it was."

"Moshi moshi, Natsu-san."

"Yo. Either way, you two are on fire." Natsu punched the air eagerly, unable to resist using one of his fire-related expressions. Sagittarius took it in his stride. It took only a short time working with Lucy to get acquainted with the Fire Dragon Slayer, who seemed to be taking his cues from Lucy in his treatment of Celestial Spirits. Or he was possibly just acting that way without realising it. They hadn't worked it out yet, but Leo (the majority of the Spirits referred to Loki by his traditional name) claimed it was the second. Mostly because Natsu couldn't take a hint if it followed him for hours and wouldn't let go after biting him.

The group of four continued on their way, eventually reaching the circular chamber the Scarecrow Parliament mage they had interrogated before entering had told them was the centre of the manor. Clearing out a few survivors who were doing their best to escape down a set of revolving stairs, they waited patiently for the others to arrive. Ignoring the pile of unconscious mages, Lucy let Sagittarius return to the Celestial Spirit World.

It came as a great shock, when Lucy was doing her best to convince Natsu to wait until Erza and Gray had arrived before heading down the mysterious stairs, when the ground and walls lit up with arcane symbols. They sprang from the entrance to the stairs, leaping out to run the lengths and breadths.

"What's going on?" Lucy took a step back, not that it helped since the runes were everywhere. "What's happening?" her eyes darted back and forth, trying to work out what was going. Happy echoed her concern, not living up to his name at all.

"Told ya we should have gone down!" Natsu hollered, apparently all too cheerful at this turn of events. Grapping Lucy's arm, he began to charge towards the stairs.

"Wait wait wait!" she shouted at him. "They'll be expecting us to come down the stairs, right? We should find a different way down." Lucy explained, hoping to get through to him.

"Aye!"

That gave him pause, but only for a second. Grinning in a slightly unsettling manner, Natsu's fist sprouted flames. "Great idea, Luce! We'll burn them" he lifted both hand, letting go of Lucy, fire blooming into a raging inferno. "From ABOVE!" He brought his arms down, hard.

The intense heat, combined with the sheer strength behind his attack, burnt through the old wood, vaporising the carpet covering it like it had never been there. Lucy screamed, fearing that she'd be burnt to a crisp by Natsu's carelessness. She needn't have worried, for the flames were concentrated on the spot immediately beneath Natsu.

Not much reassurance when it caused the rest of the floor to give way and take them all with it. Screaming in terror, and embarrassment when she realised her skirt was flying up and giving Natsu and Happy a free show, Lucy fell alongside the Dragon Slayer and Exceed. Both of whom remained extremely calm, if you counted howling in excitement and glee as 'calm' compared to terrified screaming.

Lucy ceased screaming when she felt arms circle her waist and a sudden control to their descent. Looking up, she found herself held against Natsu, Happy's wings spreading out from behind him.

"Yo." He grinned at her, and Lucy suddenly felt reassured. At least now she had Natsu to soften their landing, if things came to it. A 'ach' escaped her throat when they landed, softly at least, after Natsu's arms had let go and her feet weren't quite ready.

It was from her sitting position that Lucy saw the circle of faces, alternating between surprise, rage, fear and what seemed to be constipation.

"You can't stop us now, Light Guild fools!" One of them, either the leader or a big mouth, yelled suddenly. "With this ritual, we, the mages of Scarecrow Parliament, will summon a horror from a beyond your imaginations to destroy you al-" leader or big mouth, a flaming fist to the face was more then enough to shut him up.

"Feh, you talked too much." Natsu's grin was maniacal, far more evil then these idiots would ever be able to manage. "You guys better be ready, cause I'm gonna burn you into char!"

"Fire Dragon's Roar!"

His blast of flame slammed into three of the circle, reducing them to three heavily burnt unconscious idiots. Natsu dropped into a handstand, roaring his spell as he spun in circle, feet spread wide.

"Fire Dragon's Claw!"

The agonised cries of more of the Scarecrow Parliament inner circle filled the room. Glancing at his fallen fellows, the last of them cast a look at the legal guild mages. The notion that the girl ducking to avoid the fire could be used as a hostage briefly occurred to him. In a rare insight, the mage decided that ticking off the fire guy by taking his girlfriend hostage was not a good a idea. Besides, if this was him normally he didn't want to see him angry. The second Natsu's attention turned to him he lifted his hands, practically screaming "I surrender!"

"Tsch, fine." Natsu grumbled, hissing at the surrender. "No fun."

"Watch what you're doing with those flames!" Lucy yelled at him, getting up and glaring fiercely, which he entirely failed to notice.

"Ah, you're okay." He grinned and waved her concerns away.

"That's not the point!" she screamed, this time in anger instead of fright.

Natsu never got the chance to reply, what with the sudden, multicoloured light which spawned above them. Looking up, all four, legal mages, cat and Dark Guild mage, found their eyes riveted to the dancing colours. They stared dully at them, watching the coursing light consolidate and forming into shapes. Before the pair of vaguely human shapes could be indentified, they flared brightly. Temporally blinded, everyone looked away until at last it faded.

Eyes still adjusting to the sudden lack of light, no one saw the cause but all heard the loud thumps of things hitting the ground, and a brief yowl of pain. Natsu's nose twitched as it caught two brand new scents.

Finally able to see, Natsu stared at the two unconscious people lying at the centre of circle in astonishment. Lucy and Happy soon joined him, neither able to explain. Eventually, all three craned their necks to stare at the surviving Scarecrow Parliament mage.

Meeting them with confusion of his own, the mage shrugged. "Not mine. If we could summon a girl, we'd know it. And she'd have bigger breasts, not tiny like that."

Out of the corner of her eye Lucy caught a twitch from the unconscious redhead. Unknown to any of them, it certainly was lucky that she was asleep. Had she heard, she'd have put the whole of Fairy Tail to shame where property damage is concerned.

SlayersXFairyTail

Hope you enjoyed the first chapter, I'm working away at the next one. Please review, it makes me feel important, special and warms my urge to write more.