A/n I don't own pokemon, and I will not take responsibilities for any mental injuries you may have while reading this. Proceed at your own risk.

"I'm bored." Indeed he was. He was lounging around, poking the chair he was sitting on like it was the most interesting thing in the world.

"Good for you," murmured his oldest brother from behind a book.

Chili narrowed his eyes. "That's not the answer I was looking for."

"And what do you suggest?" Cress replied nonchalantly.

"Well . . . we should do something!" he stood up straight and announced.

Cilan looked up from his laptop. "Like?"

"Like . . . something we've never done before. Yeah! We should go- bungee-jumping!"

"No," his brothers both replied sternly.

"How about- snow boarding?"

"No."

"Scuba diving?"

"Absolutely not," countered Cilan, typing something.

"Mountain climbing?" He received no answer. "So I can take that as a yes, then?"

"No!"

He crossed his arms, pouting. "C'mon, we haven't gotten a challenger in months. If you don't like my suggestions, then why don't you guys come up with something?"

"Well . . . we could start a restaurant," Cilan said quietly.

"We already have one!" Chili fired back.

"But we aren't using it as one . . . We're using it as a gym. And since, well, we haven't gotten any challengers, I suppose we could start it back up again, right?"

"That's boring," Chili grumbled. "I don't wanna do something boring. I said let's do something we haven't done before!"

Cress thought for a moment. "We could add a theme."

"Oh c'mon Cress, that's the lamest, most-" he paused. "Awesome idea ever! You rock!"

"So, a theme. Perhaps . . . pokemon-themed?" Cilan attempted.

"How generic can ya get, Cilan? No, we need something original. Something with pizzazz. Something like . . ."

"Nature-themed?"

"Medieval-themed?"

"Nah, I was thinking, like, circus-themed or something."

"Circus-themed? Think again, Chili," responded Cress.

"Well, we need something! What's exactly opposite of everything we've ever done before?"

"Mess-themed?" Cress deadpanned.

Cilan grinned slightly. "Garbage-themed?"

A dangerous spark came into Chili's eyes. "I've got the best idea yet. Evil-themed."

Cress attempted to stifle his laughter without avail, and Cilan stared at his brother in shock. "I'm sorry, did you just say you want our restaurant, our esteemed restaurant, to have an evil theme?" The middle brother was normally the most calm, but, although he didn't raise his voice, it was obvious he was upset.

"C'mon, it'll be awesome. Cress?"

"I don't care, Chili," he snickered.

"Yes! Two against one, which means our restaurant will be evil."

"Cress, you can't be serious," Cilan argued quietly.

"We should give it an awesome name!"

"I am serious, Cilan. How much trouble can he get into? Honestly, I'm sure it'll be evil in name alone. Chili is a gym leader, just like you and I. He won't break the law."

"Something that attracts masses of people to our evil restaurant!"

"I wouldn't put it past him. You know how he gets when he's all excited about something."

"Something like . . . McEvils! Wait, no, that doesn't sound right."

"Yes, but he can't do that much. Besides, we won't let him cross the line."

"Or . . . Burger Overlord! Actually, that won't work. We don't serve cheeseburgers."

"But what if he does cross the line, Cress?"

"Evil Garden? T.G.I. Sinister? Wicked Tuesdays? I-H-O-B?"

"What?" Cilan questioned.

"I-H-O-B. International House of Bad."

Cilan rolled his eyes, and Cress turned his attention to the middle brother. "Then we'll have to stop him."

"I've got it! 'The Restaurant of Doom'! What do you think?"

"Sounds great," Cress replied, looking back down at his book.

Cilan shook his head and sighed. "I hope you know what you're doing."

"Which one of us?" asked Chili, a broad grin on his face.

"Both," he muttered.

The rest of the day passed without much trouble; Chili continued rambling about his restaurant, Cress read some books, and Cilan did his best to ignore Chili by focusing on completing the article on grass-type pokemon that he was writing. The gym was, for the most part, as quiet as it always was. 'Perhaps he won't go through with it,' Cilan thought as he drifted to sleep that night.

The next morning, he awoke to find he was wrong. Very wrong. The whole gym had been decorated in black, with creepy pictures and villain slogans pasted all over the walls. The tables were set up, as was the kitchen. The only thing it was missing was people, both for serving and being served.

"W-what did you do?" Cilan managed, staring at the appalling scene before him.

"Isn't it great?" he heard behind him. Turning, Cilan wished he hadn't partaken in the conversation yesterday. Chili was dressed head to toe in black, the only exception being a bright red cape. "I couldn't sleep, so I just worked on it all night. This is going to be the evilest restaurant ever!"

Cilan ran down the hall to his older brother's room. "Cress!" he shouted, banging on the door.

"Is that you, Cilan? Why are you yelling, and at such an early hour?" he asked lethargically, opening the door.

"L-look what Chili did," he said, pointing at the 'decor'.

Cress blinked. "Chili . . . when did you do this?"

"Last night. I couldn't sleep, I was too excited! Man, this is gonna be awesome."

"Who's going to wait the tables?" he asked.

"Well, you of course!"

Emotion began to rise up into Cress's face. "W-what? Me? You expect me to wait on all these tables?"

"Well, Cilan will be like a go between from the kitchen to the main dining area. In other words, he'll help with both cooking and waiting tables."

"I never agreed to this!" Cilan contradicted.

"And you two'll have to look the part, so go get dressed in all black. I'll get you guys some capes." He took off in the other direction, leaving his bewildered brothers standing in shock.

"I think this has gone far enough, Cress." Cilan was the first to recover.

"Y'know, maybe you're right . . . I'll go talk to him." Cress went in the direction of his brother, and Cilan went back to his room. 'Maybe there's enough time to wrap up this article . . .'

As the three all headed to their destinations, they heard the gym door being knocked on; very very loudly.

They reached the door at the same time. "Chili, take off the cape," Cilan commanded quietly.

"No! It makes me look awesome! Not that I didn't before-"

"People are gonna think you're crazy!"

"No, they'll admire my super-evil-coolness!"

"Chili-"

"Guys!" Cress growled near-silently. "Hush!" He then opened the door, and the brothers put on their best smiles; Chili's looking more sinister than kind.

The open entrance revealed six teen-aged boys, all of them looking eager to battle. "We're here to challenge this gym!" announced the blond boy who had been practically breaking the door down.

Spreading his fingers in a creepy manner and waving his arm to the inside, Chili faked a pitiful evil accent. "Velcome to the restaurant of Doom!"

A/n: Okay, I think that up there is proof that I don't think like normal people. I was going to make this a one-shot, but a plot got kinda wedged into my cranium and wouldn't come out no matter how hard I pulled, so I have to make it a chapter-fic.

You're probably wanting to complain right now, saying 'Cress doesn't talk like that' and 'Cilan doesn't think like that' and 'Chili wouldn't do that' and frankly, I don't care. Don't review if you're just going to tell me that. Thank you! ^_^

By the way, please review, actually. I'd like that. ^_^ But I'm not going to change their personalities because A) They are game-verse and B) That's how I perceive them.

Lastly, I'm going to have the following characters in this story: Chili, Cress, Cilan, Barry, Ethan, Wally, Brendan, N, Black, Dawn, Lyra, Lance, Blue, Red, Krys, Leaf, Silver, Cynthia, Steven, Wallace, May, Lucas, and White. YEAH this is gonna be interesting. XD

Well, that's all I can think to write for now. Farewell, my readers. ^_~

Finessefully,

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