This is my first fanfic. This is a ficlet that takes place following episode 4x23 in which Sara gets picked up for drunk driving and Grissom picks her up from the police station.

Grissom: "Is she okay?" Oh, God, poor Sara. How did this happen? "I'll come pick her up."

As Grissom walked out of his office to his Denali in the parking garage, he couldn't help but think that Sara's drunkenness was somehow his fault. Not only that, but he couldn't help thinking that he was an idiot for not seeing it; Brass had, in fact, told him just last week that he suspected Sara had a drinking problem, but he blew him off saying that Sara seemed perfectly fine to him. Well, how was he supposed to know if she was fine or not when he made a study out of avoiding her as much as possible because he knew, he just KNEW, that his feelings for her were inappropriate; he just couldn't be a "cradle-robber" and he just couldn't lose the job he had worked so hard for and loved so much. He couldn't lose his job for Sara because without the lab, without his team, without Brass, heck even without Greg, he would be empty, and could Sara alone ever fill that huge void? He wasn't sure.

The drive to the station in Henderson where Sara was being held was uneventful, which was good because Grissom had much more on his mind than the road in front of him. He didn't know what he would say to Sara. "I'm sorry" seemed inappropriate, because really, what did he have to be sorry for? He had made it clear to Sara that he couldn't be with her when he turned down her invite to dinner, hadn't he? He hadn't really driven her to drink by wanting to promote Nick instead of her, had he? Sara knew he had her best interests at heart, didn't she? He knew how much Sara cared for him, so didn't she know he cared for her as well? Hadn't he let his guard down in front of her a few times? He was pretty sure most bosses didn't accidentally tell an underling that she's beautiful, as he had let slip once in not so many words. Sara had said, "Since when did you care about beauty?" and before he could even think about it, he replied, "Since I met you." Inwardly, he cursed himself for saying it; he meant it, yes, but Sara deserved someone younger than him. He never meant to lead her on. He was afraid of having a relationship with her, afraid of the consequences a relationship with Sara might have.

Realizing he still hadn't figured out what to say to Sara, Grissom pulled into the parking lot of the Henderson Police Department and found an open space, which wasn't hard to do seeing as it was 4:30am. As he walked into the station, Grissom found that his pulse was rising, signaling to him that he was genuinely nervous about approaching Sara, the untouchable woman he might actually be in love with.

A graveyard shift officer greeted Grissom as he walked through the front doors. He said something about how Sara's blood alcohol level was above the new limit, but not the old limit, so that's why she wasn't being booked, but that's also why they called Grissom instead of letting her go, but Grissom could hardly hear the officer over the combined noise of his violently beating heart and the whirlpool of thought swirling through his mind. He did manage to get out a "Thank you, officer," as the gentleman showed him through to the lounge where Sara was.

Sara was in the seat farthest from the door with her hands supporting her chin and her face staring at the floor in front of her; she looked dejected, but the infamous Sidle Stare was clouding her face as well, indicating fury. As he walked over to her, Grissom frantically continued his search for the right thing to say, but coming up empty-handed, he merely sat down next to her in silence.

Why is it that I can interrogate the world's worst people- people who hurt children, rape innocent women, murder family members- without feeling scared, hurt, frustrated or overwhelmed, but I can't even look at Sara in this situation without being overcome by emotion?

After hesitating for a fraction of a second, Grissom held out his hand to Sara. She took it. "Come on, I'll take you home." That's it? That's all I could come up with? Well, maybe I can get her to talk to me in the car.

As they stood up, Sara looked into his eyes for a brief moment. In that moment Grissom could see the pain and shame in Sara's eyes, and again, the feeling of being responsible for Sara's behavior surfaced.