Shinobi Weekly! Exclusive!

Shikamaru and Temari break up!

Shinobi Weekly! investigates the lies, secret seduction missions and allegations of cheating that caused the infamous two to break it off!

PLUS! Exclusive interview with Temari's maid who reveals all! The temper tantrums and jealously that made Shikamaru say he'd finally had enough!

Only in this week's Shinobi Weekly!

It has been no secret to the Shinobi world of the ongoing relationship between Konoha's resident lazy genius and the Princess of Suna but today, Shinobi Weekly! can exclusively reveal that the ninja worlds' hottest couple have decided to go their separate ways. This revelation comes only days after Temari, 22, ventured to the Amegakure on a top secret mission with the notoriously flirtatious ANBU Inuzuka Kiba, 19, despite Nara's recent promotion to the elite tactical squad himself. Shinobi Weekly! has obtained exclusive information to suggest that this shun of Shikamaru, 19, as her partner was no mistake on Temari's behalf.

"She's finally had enough of his lazy ways," Temari's former maid reveals. "The three day mission to Amegakure was supposed to be a 'make or break' time away from each other but for Temari, spending so much time with someone as energetic as Kiba has made her realise what she is missing out on," the source divulged.

And 'make or break' it was. The blonde bombshell returned home to Sunagakure and civilians from the area tell Shinobi Weekly! that she has not left her house since.

As for Shikamaru Nara, it appears that the dishevelled jounin has spent little time grieving. Pictured above with the clearly lovestruck code breaker Shiho, 19, the Nara clan heir looks at ease and his usual apathetic self as the two enjoyed a simple ramen lunch together earlier this week.

"Shikamaru has finally realised that Shiho is the one for him," an anonymous Konohagakure shinobi suggested today. "He has publically made his desire for a simple wife known many times and has decided that Shiho fits the bill perfectly. Her quiet ways and intelligence are appealing to him," the shinobi continued.

(See overleaf for our Shinobi special on why Shiho is the one for Shikamaru)

The decision by Nara to move on so quickly has apparently come as a shock to many, including Temari herself, whose recent hermit status is a result of her heartbreak over Shikamaru's lack of emotion.

"Whilst Temari realises that it's over between her and Shikamaru, she still can't believe that he would move on so quickly," our maid says. "But Temari has always been suspicious over Shiho and her feelings for Shikamaru. This picture is the final nail in the coffin for their relationship, in her eyes."

Indeed, Temari's jealous nature has appeared many times, including the now renowned episode where she publically attacked Shikamaru's teammate, Ino Yamanaka, 19, after Shinobi Weekly! obtained information suggesting that the relationship between Yamanaka and Nara had become a little less platonic after a drunken night out together.

"She has never been completely comfortable in her relationship with Shikamaru," our source continues. "The long-distance, his constant surroundings of barely clothed kunoichi and alcohol obsessed friends left her feeling insecure on many occasions, as she once confided in me. It doesn't surprise me that she's shut herself up in her house- Temari has never taken grief very well."

Despite reports from the Sunagakure embassy that the Kazekage's sister is perfectly fine and merely preparing for another tough mission, Shinobi Weekly!'s recently obtained photograph, above left, of the kunoichi looking tired and troubled suggests otherwise.

Shikamaru Nara was not available for comment.

Shinobi Weekly! Exclusive!

Temari vs Shiho in the fight for Shikamaru

Temari

Age 22

Rank Jounin

Measurements 37C-24-35

Shiho

Age 19

Rank Cryptologist

Measurements 34A-20-34

Below- our relationship expert, Dr. Daisuke Morioka*, explains why Shiho is perfectly suited for Shikamaru!

"Overall, she is just his type," Dr. Morioka divulges. "Yes, Temari may be curvier than Shiho and therefore more aesthetically appealing to Shikamaru, but as we all know the genius shinobi has never placed too much emphasis on looks."

Dr. Morioka suggests that his analysis is consistent with Nara's choice in women. "Shikamaru's teammate, Ino Yamanaka has consistently been voted the most attractive Konohagakure kunoichi and yet the jounin has never shown any interest in a relationship with her," the doctor continues. "What really matters to Shikamaru is personality. His consistent dislike of his mother's brash persona- which Nara has been known to liken to Temari's- along with his view that despite her age, Temari is very immature suggests that he is looking for a quiet, mature and sensible girl. Shiho is exactly that! Her low-key clothes and intelligence-driven occupation combine to produce the 'un-troublesome' women that Shikamaru has always been searching for."

Whilst they have never been seen in an intimate pose, Konohagakures' newest couple is sure to reveal themselves soon. The secret trips to dinner and late nights spent working together will not remain unlit for long, Morioka suggests. "Shikamaru would find the idea of hiding a relationship too 'troublesome'. He will expose his relationship before long, rather than hide it from the public."

Finally, Dr. Morioka believes that before long, we may hear shinobi wedding bells!

"He has been searching for his bride since he was fourteen," the doctor reveals. "Now he has found the perfect woman, why would he wait?"

* Dr. Morioka's name has been changed to protect his identity and bodily person.

Konoha's Newest Couple!

Why we're loving Kibatema!

Now that Shikatema has finally called it quits, our offices have been buzzing with the news of Kiba and Temari's hook up on that infamous mission to Amegakure.

Sources close to the pair reveal that even though Temari has always been linked to Shikamaru, the sexual tension with the Inuzuka stud existed even before Shikatema became a confirmed couple.

"They're very alike," our source suggests, "both passionate, vivacious people who enjoy a good fight and a good argument. They make a great team."

But despite the pairs obvious chemistry prior to their joint mission, eyes are now turning to the question of whether Temari let her hand slip too far even though she and Shikamaru were supposedly still a couple.

"She's always found him interesting," the source divulges, "and she's made it known publically on several occasions that if she weren't with Shikamaru, Kiba would be her next choice."

But did they hook up before Temari's relationship ended?

Our source won't comment explicitly but does have this to say;

"Temari's never been one for waiting around. Once Shikamaru started to pull away from the relationship, it would make sense that she would start looking around for a new partner. And after all the drama, Kiba is the perfect, care-free relationship that she needs."

Shinobi Weekly! couldn't agree more. Whilst we know it will take Temari a while to get over Konoha's most lusted after jounin, we think Kiba is a great partner for the feisty Sunan kunoichi.

With this latest piece of news, Shinobi Weekly! declares itself fully in the KibaTema camp!

Shinobi Weekly! Retraction.

Two issues ago, Shinobi Weekly! printed an article suggesting that Shino Aburame was utilizing his bugs to spy on naked kunoichi in the area. Following contact from the Aburame clan's attorneys, Shinobi Weekly! would like to acknowledge that their sources were incorrect and that no such evidence of Mr. Aburame's alleged spying has ever been found. Shinobi Weekly! would like to apologise to Shino Aburame, the Aburame clan and/or their bugs for any offence and distress caused.

In next week's Shinobi Weekly!

An exclusive interview with Ino Yamanaka on why she and Shikamaru will always be just friends and her new man after her Uchiha heartbreak!

Kiba Inuzuka comes over to our offices to show off his clan's new breed of pups!

An exclusive inside look at the shooting of this year's kunoichi charity calendar!

And finally, an in depth look at the shinobi worlds' hottest relationship from beginning to end- Shinobi Weekly! chronicles Shikamaru and Temari from the chunin exams to their earth shattering break-up!

Only, in next week's Shinobi Weekly!

A/N; Ok, so some of you may have read this before, some of you may have not. That's because I posted it a couple of months ago for about 8 hours and took it down again because I chickened out. But after completely forgetting about it and only rediscovering it last night at about 2am I actually really love this piece. Not because it is particularly earth shattering in its intellectual capacity, but because it is so fun to write. If I drop 50 IQ points I might pursue a career as a gossip columnist :P

So, I've decided to post it again and make it into a series; probably between 5 and 10 chapters long each chronicling a new issue of Shinobi Weekly! - the Shinobi World's gossip rag, and their insights into Temari and Shikamaru's relationship.

Note; do not take everything the mag says seriously- remember this is all speculation! ;) There will also be little tidbits included regarding the status of other couples and the usual addictive rubbish you'd find in Ok! Magazine.

For me this is just a fun outlet between all of the serious pieces I do so don't expect too much in the way of writing brilliance or great storylines but I hope you'll enjoy reading the short chapters as much as I enjoy writing them :)

Thanks and REVIEW!

SP7

P.S. Temari's measurements are those of Marilyn Monroe's and Shiho's are Audrey Hepburn.