Of Time Lords and Tampons

Author's Note: First "Doctor Who" fic ever and it has tampons in the title. *facepalm* Hope it's worth a read anyway! Enjoy!

"Honestly, I don't see why I have to-"

"You're coming, so shut up."

Usually Rory was a lot easier to distract and befuddle, but one glance at Mr. Pond told the Time Lord not to push his luck.

"But really-"

Not that he listened to that warning.

"Doctor, you poked and teased her, you're lucky you got off with just this."

"You forget she nearly ripped my braces off! Blimey, the strength of that woman!"

"Don't have to tell me, mate."

"Rory?"

"Yeah?"

"We're here."

The Tesco sign blazed before the two intrepid heroes, and both swallowed hard with a glance to each other before blazing ahead.

"Which brand did she say again?"

"You're the alien genius Lord of Time, and you can't remember?"

"Did I mention she nearly ripped my braces off? I was much more concerned for my well-being than the instructions she was screaming at me!"

"Quit shouting! And she uses these."

"She's made you do this before?"

The Doctor's face was a cross between horror and admiration.

"What? You've never had to with all your female 'companions'? Amy told me about the slide show."

"Usually the TARDIS takes care of any and all supplies, and I mean all supplies. Can't imagine why she would be holding out now."

"Please don't tell me Amy could have put your ship up to this."

"Mr. Pond! The TARDIS may be sentient, but I highly doubt she would play such favorites. She's much too old for such nonsense…but then again…"

"What did you do?"

"I may have been tinkering the other day and given her a bit of a jolt. I did apologize profusely but-"

"I cannot believe you."

"No really, I did shock her but-"

"For flying a female ship and almost always keeping female company you really are thick, Doctor. And in that one respect I am far superior," Rory smirked with a shake of his head.

But before the Time Lord could start to argue his sensitivity regarding the opposite sex while still standing in the feminine hygiene aisle, Rory quickly interrupted.

"Look, let's just get her some Cadbury's and get out of here."

"Brilliant idea! And then we can be on our way! There's a moon a couple of galaxies out during this time that if I remember correctly-"

Listening to the Doctor prattle on, Rory decided it was best not to tell him that Amy would refuse to go anywhere for at least two days until she stopped feeling like, in her words, "A bloody beached whale."

Yes, he mused, better for the once Raggedy Doctor to learn about that all on his own. The man was always saying he liked learning new things, rare as that was.

Hopefully Amy wouldn't hurt him too badly.