Sasuke the Cat

9foxgrl

A/N: This idea popped into my head while I was taking a Composition test of all things. How messed up is it my brain can get ideas for fanfic in randoms seconds but it takes forever in coming up with supportive ideas for a freaking ten page essay? Well enough ranting, enjoy.

"Alright, that's all for today's meeting."

The Council disperese, several were surprised to see Naruto standing outside quietly holding a battered rucsack. To many's surprise he was not wearing his shinobi gear, instead opted for a long sleeved black shirt with a thin vertical orange stripe going across the heart and navy blue pants that stopped three inches above his ankles. He was ignoring the council member's stares then moved to his objected target.

"Hey Hokage-sama? Can I ask you a question?"

This immedietly made everyone freeze. Naruto NEVER called Tsunade 'Hokage-sama' unless shit was about to hit the fan.

"What did you do?" Tsunade said instinctively.

Naruto looked confused. "For the record I have gone six months without pranking anyone, so please do not take this as my way of confessing."

"So my method of therapy worked?" Tsunade asked a bit surprised.

'How could it not, you threatented to let Anko castrate him, then turn him into your personal punching bag.' everyone thought in unison.

"If a missing nin took on another form and identity, does the old one die or what?"

"I suppose, but that would have to be a pretty strong identity."

"What if they changed species?"

"What?"

"Metaphorically speaking." Naruto quickly added.

Everyone present, even a few lingering ANBU and genin teams passing were confused and shocked at Naruto speaking properly.

"Metaphorically then it would be near to impossible to charge them. But that would maybe work." Tsunade replied wondering where this conversation was going.

"Uh huh...so is it possible to accidently force someone to change shape permenantly through a faulty jutsu?"

"Stranger things have been known to happen."

"Oh...ok...umm...Sasuke is still a missing nin yes?"

Tsunade's eyes widen. "What in the name that is all drunken shit and good in the world ? What did you do?"

Naruto laughed sheepishly and reached into the ruck sack and pulled out a sleeping black cat by the scruff of its neck. It would had looked like any other cat except for the fur in the back that stuck out like a chicken's tail.

Everyone in view of the cat gawked.

"Is that?"

"Uh huh..."

"How?"

"I. Have no. Fucking. clue." Naruto simply stated.

Said cat meowed as it woke up, revealing onyx black eyes. The cat glared at the person holding him.

"I. Hate. You." it hissed.

"HOLY SHIT! IT TALKS!"

A few hourts later after Inochi Yamanaka's several ventures into the furballs' mind and the Tsume Inuzana confirming it was indeed him, the black cat aka Sasuke Uchiha was lounging lazily in a chair next to Naruto in the Hokage's office.

"Explain once more. How the Hell did this happen?"

Naruto sighed. "Well you see had happened was:

*flashback*

Naruto was at the coast returning from a solo mission, easy C-rank, delivery a package to the leader of a small coastal town. He stopped and bought a roasted fish from a peddler then continued ot a narrow passage way that was only passive during the low tide. There he stopped. Crossing from the other side was Sasuke. The last Uchiha stopped as well.

"Naruto."

"Sasuke."

"I suppose you've been stalking me in order to force me back?"

"No this is a matter of sheer coincidence."

Sasuke was taken aback at the fact Naruto spoke properly and that this was ACTUALLY a coincidental meeting.

"So you finally learned to speak huh?"

"Shut up and move, I don't want to be stuck here when the tide comes in."

"You move first."

"Why the hell should I?"

"Because I'm an Uchiha."

"Oh don't give me because 'I'm an Uchiha shit'. I never gave a damn about it before, why should it matter now? Now move your ass!"

*flash back cancelled*

"Can you just get to the point?" Shika asked.

""Basically, we argued, fought. Naruto did this weird jutsu that made a scythe outta water. *Everyone looks at Naruto in shock* I countered. I was about to use the sharigan when he began a transformation jutsu on a clone he just created then he..."

"...he what?"

Naruto looked sheepish. "Oh...I sneezed in the middle of it...and some how with the tide that justu hit Sasuke."

He turned to his former teammate. "Be grateful. My clone was going to transform into an octopus to drown you."

"Then how the hell am I a cat?"

"How the hell should I know? Like I was asking Tsunade earlier! It was a damn fluke!"

"Change me back!" Sasuke snapped.

"If I don't know how I even made you change in the first place, how the hell do you think I can even change you back?"

Tsunade sighed. "Well. Nothing we can do right now...Naruto take Sasuke home."

"WHAT!" the two screamed in unison.

Tsunade smirked."What? You live alone, you can take care of a pet cat I assume. You have taken a great many of Tora missions."

"No way in hell!" Sasuke yowled. He hissed making all of his fur stick up.

Naruto twitched. "I am so screwed. I get the emo version of Tora...great...just what I needed..."

"I AM NOT EMO!"

"Do you still want to make killing Itachi your top priority in life?"

"HOW THE HELL CAN I DO THAT AS A CAT?"

Naruto shrugged. "Why the hell are you asking me? Now come on Umbra, get in the bag!"

"Umbra?" eveyone repeated in confusion.

"What? I can't go around openly calling him Sasuke. People will wonder if I've gone insane. Besides Umbra suits him."

"What the hell does Umbra mean?" Sasuke yowled.

"The dark side of the moon." Hiashi and Shika commented.

Sasuke's ears laid flat against his head. "I may live to regret this..."

A/N: to continue or not...hmm..maybe if I get enough reviews.