A/N: So um.. hi. Look, you probably all hate me for not updating this in over two months. Maybe some of my readers jumped ship. I'm sorry, guys. Really. Life happens. And all I'm going to say is I got sidetracked because I became obsessed with Rizzoli and Isles (Rizzles ftw), and then school started. And just... lots... has been happening. But thanks to the insistence of my fellow Tumblr-ians, most notably Shannon, here is chapter eight.

Can I promise quicker updates? No. Can I promise that this will be completed? Most definitely. And guess what, now Castle is back. Hooray. Let's all be happy. (:

Also- I hope you guys will like this chapter. I tried to make it SUPER Caskett-heavy as an apology. (Well, actually I had already planned on it before I went MIA, but still. It's a peace offering, dears.)

Enjoy?

Part Two: Clinch

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Chapter Two
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The pain in his hand had dulled somewhat in the past few hours. He was trying to balance ice cubes along his bruised fingers, both to entertain himself and to help ease the aching.

Martha and Alexis had left about fifteen minutes ago to go to dinner at a café down the street, and he was left to his own devices.

As he sat alone in his office, he found his thoughts drifting back to the funeral. He was angry that Captain Montgomery couldn't have been buried in peace. He was heart-broken that Jim Beckett had to see his daughter nearly terribly injured. And he was stunned that Kate had cared enough to stay by him, thinking that he had been shot.

They hadn't talked since their fight, and he was amazed that she hadn't seemed to be mad at him.

When it came down to it, she was still there for him.

If you're very lucky, you find someone willing to stand with you.

It wasn't coincidence that she looked directly at him when she said it. And if it was, he would gladly spend the rest of his life denying it. That look in her eyes… it was one of forgiveness. Of apology for her own mistakes.

Where we they supposed to go from here? They had all but admitted their feelings to each other, but the conflict caused by Montgomery's death had torn them apart once again. Things had been said- things they couldn't take back. They had avoided the kiss, their near-death experiences, for so long, and the issues were being pushed to the surface.

The freezer haunted him in his dreams at least once a week. The feel of her lips were constantly on his mind. The fact that she had chosen him over Josh. He couldn't suppress the feelings anymore.

His rapidly moving thoughts were halted when he thought he heard a soft knocking on the door. He rose from his desk and headed toward the foyer, reaching for the door and opening it.

On the other side was Kate Beckett.

She looked nervous, but determined.

She would never admit it, but she was tormented. That night in L.A. when she almost gave in, their fight, her break up with Josh…

She was crazy about Castle. And she was afraid. If a relationship ended poorly- hell, if the relationship ended at all- she wasn't sure how she could come back from that. She'd fall down the rabbit hole again. Neither of them could screw up. It was a risk she had calculated in her mind over and over again.

But everything was bubbling up inside her, the pressure consuming her. If the past weeks had taught her anything, it was that they didn't have forever to dance around each other. She physically ached from how much it frustrated her. It was building up inside of both of them. Their armor was cracking, their fuses running short.

And they were about to explode.

She couldn't hold it in any longer either.

"Beckett."

Her eyes fell to the floor as she greeted, "Hey, Castle."

"Do you want to come in?"

She gave a small smile and met his eyes.

"Yeah, that'd be nice."

He stepped aside and allowed her to walk past him into the loft. He turned away from her to close the door, taking a deep breath to calm his throbbing heart and the uncomfortable tightness in his stomach.

Why is she here? His thoughts automatically went to worst-case scenarios.

He tried to keep his voice smooth, but his "Can I get you anything?" came out rather squeaky.

She cocked an eyebrow but then simply replied, "No, I'm good. Thanks."

He watched her for bit, with query, studying her. The reason she was here had to be written on her face- he just couldn't find it. Was she kicking him out after he put himself in danger today? Was she going to leave again? Had she changed her mind about them?

"Something wrong?" he finally asked.

She had been expecting the question, knew it was coming, but she was still affected by it, still trembled when she realized what she was about to do.

"I just…I thought I'd come see how you were doing."

He nodded.

"Oh, right. Hell of a day."

That produced a small smile from her.

"Sure was."

Silence fell over them.

After a few moments, he took a deep breath and headed for the couch, resting his elbows on his knees and leaning forward. Whatever the reason she was here, it seemed as though he was going to have to pry.

But she surprised him when, seeing his mild irritation, she said, "Look, I just wanted to say I'm sorry."

He stared up at her. She was directly in front of him, arms folded across her body, watching him anxiously, looking almost fragile. Vulnerable.

"For what?"

She began to speak, then nipped at her lip to stop herself. She took a seat beside him on the couch, exhaled, and continued.

"I overreacted. Montgomery sent those files to you and gave you specific instructions to tell me because he knew me."

She trailed off and swallowed hard, her voice much softer now.

"Because you know me."

Castle was almost positive that his heart was knocking into his ribcage. She had so vehemently pushed him away just days earlier. She hadn't wanted to let him in, and now she was explicitly acknowledging that he understood her. He got her like nobody else ever could.

"And as much as this is my life, I throw myself headlong into these situations without thinking about the people I care about. I mean, my dad, Lanie, the boys…"

She trailed off again as she averted her gaze to the carpet.

"Me," Castle broke in.

She met his eyes again, and a smile crossed her face.

"I'm so sorry for pushing you away."

He shrugged and shook his head.

"It's okay."

She frowned. He seemed distracted, like something else was on his mind. And he knew. So Castle paused and continued.

"I said things I can't take back as well. I'm sorry for that. I'm just- I'm frustrated," he mumbled.

Their eyes locked on each other, and they were both back in Beckett's apartment. And that one question she posed, the one that said that they couldn't just go back to normal without some sort of consequence and some sort of pain for both of them, echoed in their minds.

Is that what we are?

Her gaze was alternating between his eyes and his lips, and his body seemed to be slowly gravitating close to her. It was magnetic. Hypnotic.

She murmured, "I think I know what we are."

His breath caught in his throat, and his eyebrows jumped.

Hesitantly, she reached for him, and she took his splinted hand in her own, fingers ghosting down the stitching and onto his forearm.

He placed his other hand on top of hers, staring at her.

"Kate."

She nervously met his eyes.

"I know we said we'd talk about this at some point. But if you're not ready…"

"No, Rick," she began, before any ounce of rationality could find its way back into her head. "I want this."

His grip on her hand tightened.

"I want us. You and me. Diving in together. That's what I want us to be. As long as that's what you want."

He drew his injured hand back toward him and brought the other from its place covering her knuckles up to her cheek.

Her hands dropped to her lap as his forehead came to rest against hers, his thumb caressing her cheekbone, causing her eyes to flutter closed.

"I want us. I've been waiting almost four fucking years just to be with you."

That was all the confirmation she needed.

She pulled back from his touch and opened her eyes again, reaching up to his pulse point, which she felt throbbing wildly, and covered his jaw and neck.

Their breath mingled, and the aroma of cherries filled his senses. It filled his nostrils. It burned in this throat. He felt her all around him, intoxicating. And she smiled. That genuine, light, crinkling smile.

He leaned forward, and his lips found hers- soft and warm.

She relaxed into him, tilting and deepening the kiss. She nipped at his lower lip and encircled her arms around his neck.

His tongue ran tantalizingly along her lips, desperate to meet hers. A hand snaked into his hair, and her open mouth attacked him, the feel and taste of her sweet and heavy on his tongue.

Their mouths melded together perfectly, tongues exploring, lips sliding, bodies pulsing at the significance of the moment.

They danced together in perfect rhythm, and he clung to her, never wanting her warmth to leave him.

He heard a moan rumble deep in her throat, and he could barely keep his hands from shaking as he caressed up and down her back. One hand found the nape of her neck, while the injured hand remained protectively on the small of her back as she pressed herself even closer to him, pushing him on his back, unleashing more passion into the kiss.

The way her lips felt against his. The way her tongue was stroking his. The way her fingertips were running through his hair, down the side of his face, gently tugging his earlobe.

"Apples," he groaned against her lips, but she kept touching him, driving him insane.

Rick knew then that they had to stop before he completely lost all self-control, and after two failed attempts, he broke away from Kate completely, both of them panting, eyes half-lidded and drunk with desire.

"Oh my god, Kate," he mumbled in a husky voice.

She leaned in again, her nose brushing against his in an Eskimo kiss, and he let out a groan, pressing himself further back against a pillow.

"Kate, please, stop," he whined.

She pulled back again, biting her lip to hide the satisfied smirk that was creeping up her face.

"My mom and Alexis are going to be back soon… I really don't want them walking in and uh, seeing us in a, um, compromising position."

He quickly backpedalled when her eyebrows jumped up, and her mouth fell agape in mock hurt.

"No, it's not that I'm embarrassed or don't want to be seen with you…" He trailed off. "I just thought… you always seemed… I assumed you wanted to…"

"Keep this under the radar for awhile?" she finished, twirling one of the buttons of his shirt between her fingers.

"Yes."

She sighed, carefully crawling off his chest and sitting beside him again as they both sat up. She reached for his hand and rested their entangled fingers on his knee, staring down at them and then looking into his eyes.

"Rick," she started. "Do I want Esposito and Ryan knowing about this right away so they can give us hell about it? No, I really don't. Not quite yet. Give it a week or two. And I sure as hell don't want any of this on Page Six. I want us to figure out where this is going first before they know. But Martha and Alexis- they're your family. They deserve to know."

He watched her intently as she spoke. They were making progress. This was really happening. They were- dare he say it- setting ground rules. It warmed his heart to hear her say that she wanted his mother and daughter to know right away. He knew that Martha would be thrilled. She had been waiting on this for nearly four years. And Alexis, she saw Beckett as a role model, and despite the fact that Castle had so reckless put his life on the life of her, she did admire Kate.

And then he deadpanned, "So this means we can't have a quickie in an interrogation room?"

She rolled her eyes and slapped his knee hard to reprimand him.

But then a coy smile graced her face, and she leaned in towards his lips, and the scent of cherries caused his heart to beat faster once again. Then she grazed past his face and towards his ear, whispering, "Maybe a few months down the road."

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