Realization:

Written By: Holly Seal

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Full Metal Panic or ANY of the characters in this fanfiction! This is merely an alternate ending fanfic! A "what if?" scenario! ;) 3

Sousuke fell to his knees in the middle of the fiery street. He couldn't grasp the words that had been spoken to him ruthlessly only moments ago. Kaname was dead... He hated himself for letting it take him this long and to go through such a traumatic event to see that he cared for her so dearly, but now, he could do nothing. He had no strength or will to stand and so he sat there with an empty mind. A stream of water trickled down his face and it brought him back out of his daze and his eyes widened as he reached up to wipe it from his cheek. He had never one cried in his entire life, that he could recall. Kaname had changed him...made him a different...weaker...no stronger and a better person... and he had abandoned her... His chest tightened at the thought and he suddenly couldn't bear the pain any longer and he erupted into sobs. He couldn't hold back or stop the tears as they now flowed down his cheeks. It felt good to cry. And he had so much to cry about, but it made him feel good and it angered him that he could feel any sliver of good after what he'd been told...after what he'd done to her. He punched the ground, then punched it again, and over and over. Why! Why had he left her! How could he have left her! He had just told her he'd always be there for her...and she had told him she felt most safe with him...He picked up his pistol with blurry eyes and checked for remaining ammo. There was one bullet and he scoffed.

"God must have saved this one just for me..." he shut the chamber and cocked the gun and just sat there for a moment. He looked up at the night sky through the smoke and flames and just stared for a while. He muttered under his breath into the wind,

"Kaname...If only..." he sighed and started to raise the gun.

"AND JUST WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!" a foot came out of nowhere, knocking the loaded and cocked pistol from his hand. He blinked dumbly and then looked up.

"K-KANAME!" he stammered with more emotion than she had ever seen. The tears returned to his eyes and his hand lifted towards her. She gasped softly at the sight of tears in his eyes, having never seen him cry before (much less thinking that it was even possible). She didn't even notice his hand until it had already cupped her cheek. Her eyes widened.

"W-wha...?" she tried to question his actions but her stomach had drawn into a knot and she couldn't find her voice.

"I...I was told you were...dead..." he said with such pain in his eyes. Without warning, he pulled her softly into a hug and there he just held her. Her hair smelled sweet amongst all the smoke and he thanked God countless times over in his mind that she had interrupted when she did, but most of all, that she was ok. She didn't move at first, but after a few moments, when he didn't show signs of releasing her, she fidgeted to try and look him in the eyes for answers to the many questions she had. He scooted back for a moment, apologizing for the sudden physical contact, but then relief swept over him again and he couldn't help but pull her into another hug.

She was blushing furiously by this time, and she pushed him away, not with anger, but with embarrassment.

"S-Sousuke! Why are you ...hugging me...?" he just looked at her for a moment and then smiled. Her breath vanished as if someone had stolen it right out of her lungs. She had never seen him smile like that and at her! She looked down and asked him,

"Who told you that...I was dead...?" he frowned again,

"It was...Gauron..." her eyes widened as she looked up at him with disbelief.

"He survived somehow...but was badly wounded and dying...he just..." Sousuke looked back at where the room had been moments ago, "tried to take me with him..." This time, it was Sousuke who was surprised to feel slender arms wrap around him.

"Kaname...?" he looked back and down at her. She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. He blushed,

"What's wrong!" he asked frantically. She smiled and shook her head to let him know nothing was wrong, but she couldn't stop the tears. She hugged him again and whispered into his chest, just barely audibly,

"I thought I was going to die...without you there...Where did you go...? Why did you leave me...?"

His shoulders started to tremble and his chest started to tighten again.

"Kaname...I...I didn't want to leave you but...no...no buts...I shouldn't have. I didn't want to...I even for the first time in my life let the possibility of going against orders come into my mind... That should have been enough for me to decide to stay..." she looked back up at him with a tear-stained face.

"R-really? You WANTED to disobey orders and stay with me?" Her giddiness seemed to reappear out of nowhere and she smiled a radiant smile. He nodded and allowed his hand to brush down the side of her cheek.

"Ever since I left...I haven't been myself...I keep thinking of you...hoping you're alright...cursing myself for not being there..." he went on, listing things that had hindered him from being a good soldier and how he wanted, more than anything, for things to just go back to the way they were.

After a few moments of just talking and hugging and sniffling, they finally came back to reality and Sousuke remembered that he had an AS to slaughter. He looked grudgingly over at his and turned back to Kaname. She smiled innocently up at him,

"Do your best, Sousuke..." for some reason that sent a chill up his spine and he had the sudden urge to "kiss" her. He blushed slightly, but stepped towards her. She was about to ask him what he was doing and why he wasn't fighting with his comrades yet when he slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her into a kiss. The second their lips touched, they each felt a warm fuzzy feeling in their stomachs as their hearts started to race. The burn of their lips against the other's was intoxicating and they were once again lost in the moment. Time seemed to stand still and all that mattered was each other. They started hungrily kissing each other as if they were long-lost lovers that had spent too much time away from their partner's lips and needed to fulfill a vast craving for their taste.

After what seemed like an eternity, they realized, once again, where they were and what they needed to do. With regret written on his face, Sousuke released her and as he headed for his AS, he turned and yelled at her,

"Please, STAY SAFE! I ...I don't know what I would do if anything happened to you, Kaname!" She blushed and looked around for witnesses and when she saw there were none, she smiled back at him and blew a kiss as she waved,

"I'll be fine! It would take A LOT to get rid of this chick!" She yelled back, sticking her thumb backwards at herself. With that, he jumped into his AS and stormed off to join his friends.

Kaname simply waited, in what she deemed a safe location, for him to return. She could hear and feel the rumbles of the fight and sometimes even caught glimpses of them fighting. She even saw Sousuke finally use the Lambda driver again. That made her smile brightly and she hummed as she skipped around in her little hide out, awaiting him to finish the fight and come back to her. Even though he had left her before, something deep down inside said that this time, he would be there for her no matter what tried to stop him and that he would do everything in his power to get her back home safely. From now on, she didn't have to worry, because he would always be there to protect her, this time, though, as something more than just her guard from people trying to get her because she was a "Whispered". This time...he'd protect her because he wanted to. :) END! 3