Cold, it felt cold in her office. It had felt like this for goddess knows how long now. Even with one of Illium's more expensive air conditioners and heat regulator systems installed in her office, the room still felt cold. She had ignored or perhaps even forgotten that, having only started to notice it again now. But the cold did not bother her, perhaps she had just gotten used to it? Yes, that had to be the answer, she was used to feeling cold now. It had been so long since she felt any warmth, whether it was being close to someone in body and mind, or perhaps just the companionship of a genuine friend, she had not felt any warmth. And those memories she had of such, felt like a distant dream. Or perhaps memories of a different person entirely.

Now there was only one goal, she had only one goal. To make the shadow broker pay. It was the best she could do, it was a goal worth following, it was something meaningful. If she killed him she would stop his nefarious dealings with the Collectors, and she would finally be able to avenge Feron… And Shepard.

Shepard. Some part of her mind always seemed to wander off whenever she thought of him. She wondered if she could have done something different, had she insisted on staying with him, she could have saved him. Spare him the fate of suffering and dying alone in the dark void of space. But no, she left him to die. In the aftermath of this disaster, she had been given a chance, a chance to redeem herself. Shepard's corpse had been found and was to be brought to the Collectors, to be experimented on. She had to prevent this, she knew it would not bring Shepard back, but if she could recover the body, she would be able to give her love a proper goodbye, it was the least she could do.

When she finally recovered the body there was little joy for her to be had, she had left Feron behind, sacrificing a life for a corpse. And then Cerberus approached her with an offer, they could rebuild him, bring him back to life. But she knew better, Cerberus would use him for their own ends and needs, she would save him from one inhuman experiment only to hand him over to another. So she made a deal with the devil, telling herself that it was for the good of the galaxy and Shepard. But she knew that she was simply lying to herself, she had done it not for good, but for her own selfish desire to see him return. And if Shepard returned, would he forgive her? Would anyone forgive her?

No.

That was the answer, she would be hated, despised. Her actions could only be seen as a betrayel after they both saw what Cerberus had done before. After..

Beep! Beep!

A message popped up on her computer, snapping her out of her personal thoughts. She had lost focus on the task at hand, her mind was empty. She turned her head and looked at the dogtags placed next to the computer. She tried to think back, think back to something happy. But she could only feel one thing.

Cold…