Again.

Again I wake up to another pointless, painful, endless day.

I don't want to be here. I don't need to be here.

Another day I have to go through the endless pain…by dad.

And my mom…who just sits there and acts as if nothing is wrong when it's all wrong.

There is nothing left for me. I have nothing. I do nothing and I'm treated like nothing.

I am nothing.

I am worthless.

A knock on my door interrupts my thoughts. It's my mom.

"You have to go to school honey."

I refuse to even look at her. Ashe knows what he does to me and doesn't do a damn thing about it. I ignored her response but got up to take a shower. I closed the door and stripped off all my clothes. The scars and bruises on my stomach were sickening. Why were they on me? It makes me look ugly. The thought of Eli actually seeing them, kills me.

I step into the shower and turn the water completely cold. Not an ounce of hot water. It tingles but its feels so good, hitting my skin, bouncing right off the bruises. It refreshes me, but not enough that it changes me. I scrubbed myself clean, trying to be gentle because the scars would only get worst. I turned the water off, grabbed my towel and headed to my room. I put on my clothes, hoodie and jeans. Every day. Every, single day. I don't bother putting a shirt on considering its kind of hot out. I just can't let anyone see anything, they'll know and I can't let that happen. I grabbed my bag, iPod and keys and make my way out the house.

In no time, I arrived in the Degrassi parking lot. I turned the volume on my iPod all the way up, blocking out the mindless chatter.

And I want and I need
As much as anybody
Sometimes I cry
But doesn't everybody
I have secrets, I have scars
As deep as anybody
I have fears no one hears
But don't tell anybody
Sometimes I lie
But doesn't everybody
Sometimes
Doesn't everybody
I know that sometimes I end up running wild
I feel just like a little child but tell me
Doesn't everybody
Sometimes

I was interrupted when I felt someone tugging on my arm. I turned around and there he was. Eli. The only person in the world felt that actually cared about me. The only person who kept me somewhat, sane, whatever that is. I pulled one headphone out,

"Hey"

"Hey beautiful" he smirked. He hugged me tight but the pain was killing me. I groaned and pulled him off.

"You alright?" He asked. I crinched at the question. I hated it because he always asked that and I was never alright. Nothing was ever alright.

"Yea I'm fine" I lied. "My stomach just hurts."

"Okay" he lightly wrapped his arms around my waist and we walked into school,

Eli didn't know about my home life. No one did besides my mom, obviously. Eli never met my parents. He begged so many times, but I never let him. I feel bad about not telling him, but it would make things easier if I didn't.

The day sped by fast and I was supposed to going over to Eli's afterschool. I did this every day. I hated going straight home, it was just more pain I would have to suffer. The ride to his house e was silent. I was still not in the mood to talk, and he knew I didn't so neither of us said a word. We arrived at his house and his mom was in the kitchen.

"Hey baby girl" Cece called out.

"Hi" I muttered.

"You're not hot with that hoodie, Clare? It's like 80 degrees out."

"Yea, why do you have that on?" Eli asked.

"Umm—I-I'm fine with it on. It's not that hot to me." I lied.

"Oh" Cece responded.

Eli grabbed my hand and we walked upstairs to his room. I sat on the bed and he closed the door. He came back laid me down and began to kiss me. I didn't refuse; I just wanted to forget about everything else. He slipped his tongue in my mouth; I wrapped my arms around his neck and deepened the kiss. He began to life up my sweater slightly, when I pulled back.

"No, Eli."

He looked at my stomach and I quickly put it down.

"What is that?" H e asked. He looked so confused and I hate ling to him. It only made things more complicated than it needed to be.

"Clare, how'd you get that?

"I fell." Again I lied.

"Where?"

Oh crap. Where did I fall?"

"Umm in school."

"Clare, you don't get bruises like that from falling. What's happening?" Eli knew something was up but I couldn't tell him. I didn't answer and just avoided eye contact.

"Clare, can you please tell me what's wrong?"

She shook her head, "I can't"

"Why not?"

"I just can't tell you." I yelled and stormed out.

Every time something good happens to me, it always goes bad for no reason at all. Or maybe I just brought the bad upon myself.

I got home; my dad and mom were in the living room. I avoided them and went up to my room. I closed the door and someone it swung open. Of course, it was my dad.

"Where were you?" He asked assertively.

"In school." I bluntly responded. I hated him, his presence alone, it sickened me.

He pushed me to the bed and tore off my hoodie. He hovered on top of me.

"Get off of me" I yelled.

"Shut up." He yelled back.

He tore off his shirt and pants then tore off mine. This happened every day. I was lying to Eli telling him I wasn't ready, my vow meant everything to me when my dad raped me every night. The lies were slowly and painfully eating me alive.

He tore off my panties, "Can't you give me a break? I can't take this anymore." I cried, ever night I cried. Because of this, because of him.

"No, you're a stupid bitch who needs to get laid." I sighed knowing it was no use arguing. He pushed into me, it wasn't even painfully anymore. I was so used to it, I felt nothing. I cried and simply waited for it to be over.

Eli's POV

Why did she leave? What did I do? Were we over?

I couldn't stand no knowing, I hopped in Morty and made my way to her house. I climbed up to her window, knowing if her parents were home they didn't know who I was and probably wouldn't let me in. My jaw dropped at the sight, what the hell was happening?

She was-her dad-they're having sex. She's crying. Clare. My Clare, is being raped? By her dad?

There we go! REVIEWS FOR NEXT CHAPTER. I need a certain amount before I update the next one. I really like this story, next chapter Eli is obviously going to stop Randall but later in the chapter Clare ends up in the hospital. Oh btw, the song is Sometimes by Melanie Horsnell