This story has been on my mind for a while now, but I didn't know how to put it in words. Every time I approached it, something didn't feel right or the pieces didn't fit. I tried to see it from a "slash" point of view, but honestly, I didn't know how to do that either since I'm not gay and I'm not a man. But I do know what love is and what it's like to try and try and try and fail every single time. I also know what heartbreak feels like and wanting a brass ring that seems to be forever out of reach as the realization that dying alone is perhaps the only option left on the table. So, I combined all of those and tried to apply them to my two favourite men while giving it a unique twist with Hotch doing the pursuing. I don't know if there is going to be a sequel. But I can honestly say this story has been written.

I don't own Criminal Minds.

Song prompt: "Second Time Around" by Shalamar.

Second Time Around

I love you.

The words continued to ring in David Rossi's ears hours later. Even after he had decided to get in the truck and leave the security of his home for the peaceful familiarity of his beloved cabin. And long after he had taken a shower, changed, and was now sitting on the porch step puffing on an expensive cigar, the words still haunted him.

Three disastrous marriages, more relationships than the law allowed…but who knew that all this time the one person he had been looking for - the missing piece to his soul - may have been standing beside him? He was supposed to be the expert profiler and best selling author, so how did that get past him? Was he that blind? Or that jaded?

Taking a long puff, he let the aromatic smoke roll over his tongue and fill his lungs. Closing his eyes, he expelled the smoke and tried to clear his thoughts. But where to start…?

He had tried to rationalize the whole thing from start to finish. He turned it upside down, inside out, and told himself that it was wrong on so many levels and could never last. Hell, what did an old, broken down, thrice married and divorced, confirmed bachelor have to offer? Nothing but heartache for anyone who crossed his path.

He took another puff and watched the sky turn from bright yellow to a darker shade of amber. Yellow, he told himself. Cowardly yellow, just like your spine, he corrected.

But it could work, his conscience argued. It was a known fact that every successful thing took effort. Hell, his first book had been anything but a piece of cake, but he hadn't given up. And he had tried to make it work with his wives…until it wasn't fun any more.

Sighing heavily, he examined the expensive cigar. None of his wives had liked cigars. Maybe that should have been a sign. His heart had tried to tell him that the women had been wrong for him, but he hadn't listened. Now his heart was saying that maybe it was time to take a chance. If he was going to take a chance again and lay it all on the line, he knew the one question he was going to have to ask.

But right now, he wanted to stay where he was where no one could find him as he continued to try and make sense out of his messed up life.

Slowly it dawned on him that he could be out here forever.
****

Hotch slowed the car down and took the curve to the cabin with extra care. This was the last place he wanted to be, but if he was going to have something with Dave, he was going to have to bite the bullet. He was going to have to do the one thing he couldn't do with Haley: reach out and make the first move.

Rounding the corner of the cabin, he followed the circular driveway. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed Dave sitting on the porch step.

Putting the car in park, he turned off the engine. "You can do this, Aaron," he told himself. Opening the door, he stepped out. Shutting the door softly, he rounded the car and walked toward his friend.

"I thought I might find you out here," Hotch greeted with a hint of teasing in his voice.

Dave flicked his gaze up, then back down. "Hello, Aaron."

An uncomfortable silence filled the space between them. Shifting his weight from one foot to another, Hotch shoved his hand in his slacks pocket.

"I think we need to talk," Hotch began.

Dave shook his head. "I don't think that would be wise right now," he commented and bit down on the cigar.

"Dave…" Hotch searched for the right words. For once. "I know that what I said probably threw you…"

Dave stopped puffing and looked up sharply. "Threw me? You fucking pulled my world out from under me, Aaron!"

"And maybe it wasn't the right time to drop that bombshell on you," Hotch continued, "but I meant it."

"You told me that you loved me!"

"I do."

"So, how am I supposed to reply to that?" Dave asked.

"That you love me, too. Personally, I think we need to talk about it."

"That is why you're out here?"

"Yes. I'm tired of running away from happiness and paying for sins that are and aren't mine. I want what I've been denying myself for so many years."

Dave took a long puff. "And you think I'm the answer to your prayers?"

"It makes sense. Look at all we've been through over the years. The failed marriages and the way we have always been there for one another," Hotch pointed out. He looked at the step. "Mind if I sit down?"

"Go ahead." Dave moved over.

"I honestly thought my marriage to Haley was going to work. It was all there - the love, the commitment - and for a while I was happy. Even when Haley and I had broken up, I thought maybe we might get back together. I wanted to get back together." Hotch paused. He had never told another living soul what was in his heart and now everything could come back to bite him in the ass. "At least I thought I wanted to get back together…"

Hotch took a deep breath. "Until you came back."

Silence fell between the two men as the words hung in the air. As the silence stretched, tiny stars slowly dotted the dark blue sky while the nocturnal sounds of the woods creatures came to life.

"When did you know?" Dave's voice cut through the quiet.

"I think deep down inside I've always known, but I think it really dawned on me last week when you risked your life with that UNSUB. You could have been killed, and all I could think of was that I never got a chance to tell you how I feel." Hotch turned to face Dave. "I love you. Look me in the eye and say that you don't love me, too."

Dave shook his head and gave a sardonic laugh. "Hell, Aaron, I don't even know what love is; I don't think I ever have. But if I have to label it, I know that what I feel for you is stronger than a love for a brother, but I don't know if it's the kind of love you are looking for."

"That's a start," Hotch commented. "We can make this work."

"I'm not gay."

Hotch shrugged. "I don't know what is in your mind or heart, but I do know that I was straight when I was married to Haley and you were straight when you married your three wives and we couldn't make something so easy work. We've been blaming ourselves for failing but maybe it was no one's fault. Maybe they weren't right for us."

"I don't understand why would you want to be with a broken down, old womanizer like me?" Dave argued. "I have nothing to offer you. Every woman who has spent any length of time with me ends up despising the ground I walk on."

"Because we understand one another. We've both taken that long road through hell and survived. I know that we can make this work if we want it bad enough."

"Aaron…" Dave watched his best friend's eyes. He couldn't put his finger on it, but there was something comforting in Hotch's brown eyes.

"I want this to work," Hotch stated firmly. "For the first time in my life, I am willing to do the hard work to make this succeed. We've come a long way; maybe this is our reward."

Hesitantly, Hotch reached for Dave's hand. Feeling no resistance, he intertwined their fingers. "Baby steps."

Dave glanced down. A warm feeling started at his hand and worked slowly thru his body. He let out his breath in one long stream. Maybe it could work out.

"Baby steps," Dave answered.

Surrounded by the soft sounds of the woods, they watched the sun go down.