Disclaimer-I do not own Bleach, nor do I make any profit from it. I'm just borrowing Kubo Tite-san's characters for a while for a little fun. I'll have them back before curfew.

AN: It's the long awaited sequel. The Gotei 13 is as dysfunctional as they come so what have the captains been up to?

AAN: Aizen, Ichimaru and Tosen are still 'good guys'.

The Handbook of Central 46-Captain's Edition

Foreword

If you are reading this paragraph at this moment, you have taken the time to read and comprehend the summary of this rulebook. We thank you for your time and interest in this manual.

If you are a lieutenant reading this, you have no business delving into this book. A manual has already been written for you and contains all of the necessary changes for the proper behavior for your rank. Go read it.

If you are a captain reading this, you are supposed to be reading this. The lieutenants manual is for the lieutenants and serves to correct the behavior of the lieutenants. There is no reason for you all to be snooping into your second seats' business. You all received this book at last week's joint meeting and were expected to read it, no excuses.

Yes, you were expected to read. This whole book as a matter of fact.

As stated in the first paragraph on the first page, this handbook is solely for the purpose of correcting the irrational and negative behavior of the captains of the Thirteen Court Guard Squads. In no way, shape, or form should this handbook be seen humorous or taken lightly.

The rules laid out in this handbook are based on the day-to-day observations of the captains of the Thirteen Court Guard Squads. This handbook, or manual as it may be called, will be updated when ludicrous and/or erratic conduct is performed. This handbook will also be edited/checked by Head Captain Yamamoto when first drafted, as to add his input.

This manual shall concern the actions of the following captains:

-Soi Fon: Squad Two captain

-Ichimaru Gin: Squad Three captain

-Unohana Retsu: Squad Four captain

-Aizen Sosuke: Squad Five captain

-Kuchiki Byakuya: Squad Six captain

-Komamura Sajin: Squad Seven captain

-Kyoraku Shunsui: Squad Eight captain

-Tousen Kaname: Squad Nine captain

-Hitsugaya Toshiro: Squad Ten captain

-Zaraki Kenpachi: Squad Eleven captain

-Kurotsuchi Mayuri: Squad Twelve captain

-Ukitake Jushiro: Squad Thirteen captain

The language in this manual shall be upfront, direct and accurate. Our words will not be misconstrued, but if this results, shall be explained on request. Titles such as 'captain' and 'taicho', 'lieutenant' and 'fukutaicho' are interchangeable and will be used in place of each other.

Zaraki, please put your shirt on.

If there are any questions/comments regarding the information inside this handbook, they should be directed to Sasakibe-fukutaicho (perfect example of title changing), seeing as he is the only lieutenant with commendable behavior. He is now in charge of the commentary status of this book and the lieutenants handbook as well.

We shouldn't have to write this. You captains should know better.