No Virtue

Padma likes Dean. Likes him a lot - a lot, a lot, actually. She has for a very long time and it won't go away no matter how hard she's tried, no matter how many times she's wished she could read her textbooks instead of picturing him, no matter how many times she's told herself that's he's not flirting.

When she sees him dating, frustration mounts. She's unable to do anything, unable even to admit to liking him. Parvati tells her that Lavender told her that she overheard Su telling Luna that she overheard Neville telling Kevin that Dean called her and Parvati the two best looking girls in the year - frustration mounts with that, too, not only because Parvati uses her head for nothing but gossip, but also because these are words that have been passed down many, many times, more times than Padma cares for - that, and Parvati won't be still long enough to let Padma say that she may just like Dean.

Saying it out loud would make it official and then she could admit to it - but Parvati is too loud, Padma too quiet, and this fantasy never becomes tangible, much like the romance that struggles for life in her chest.

Sometimes she thinks that it isn't just the idea of romance that is struggling, but her own heart and soul as well. But that's silly and the thoughts are pushed back.

Yeah, I know, another story. Had to. Anyway, this one's for my dear and lovely Padma, and will feature a plot that has been begging to be written for a long time - to me, anyway. This is a rough draft, meant mainly to get a reaction, because I'm an attention whore like that. Stick with me while I get my thoughts in order.

Note that this fic is rated M. It will feature self-harm, but it will NOT feature anything overly gory - at the most, you'll see it immediatly after, or before or whatever. I'm not going to give you any messy details or anything, but be aware that this is the content that is going to be displayed. It might even only be hinted at, but I don't take this lightly, so, it's rated M. If you dont want to read that, stop freaking reading. No complaining.

Thoughts?