Chapter 21

Ed found me much later than I thought he would, after all I practically claimed the training area as my own and practically turned it into a smoking flame pit. I had already burnt three training dummies to ground and gathered a crowd as I did so. Not many of the elves got to see me showcase my skills, Ed would ensure any area we practiced in was completely empty and would remain so until we were done with training. How he did it, I never knew, but it made a showcase of my powers an attractive sight. So like moths to a flame people came, not that I paid them any mind. Instead I practiced throwing fireballs, twirling and rolling as I did so and pretending, I wasn't imagining a pretty blonde curly head as I did so. It took him at least twenty minutes to find me and by then I was already on my sixth dummy.

"Impeccable form, but what did those poor innocent dummy souls do to you?" I could feel his smirk despite the fact my focus was on the fireball steadily glowing in my hands.

"Leave me alone." I swung my arm forward, releasing the fireball directly into the center of the dummy's head. The fireball I hurled was larger and burned hotter than all the rest, the the old burlap sack and straw acted as perfect kindling and the body erupted into flames. The wood support curled in on itself and the burning ball of flame fell to the ground, igniting the grass around it. With a sigh I clenched my fist and the flame extinguished. I pulled water from the air and extinguished the embers left behind.

"Well," Ed sidled up next to me with a curious expression on his face, "are you going to tell me who pissed in your cheerios?" I threw him in the best glare I could muster and for half a second I contemplated throwing a fireball at his head. Instead I moved to the next training dummy and summoned another fireball to my palm. I stared down at the swirling ball of fire that was slowing turning from a burning orange to a light blue.

"That's the first time you've been able to do that." Ed stepped in front of me, his right eyebrow raised in question.

"Can we just train today?" My voice cracked as I spoke, and I couldn't help but realize just how pathetic I sounded. The fire in my palm disappeared and instead the warmth and magic I usually felt when I summoned my magic seemed to dissipate, leaving me feel cold and alone.

Ed was quiet for a moment, and then his hand was under my chin lifting it so I could meet his gaze, "Come now Nuka, I give you a day off and this is how you spend it?" He tsked quietly, before moving his hand to ruffle my hair. I let out a grunt and shoved his hand away. "We aren't training today, instead I have a surprise, but I'm not going to show it to you when one, you look like that," He flailed his arms around to gesture at my outfit which had been thoroughly ruined. I looked down to take int the burnt sleeves and scatterings of burnt holes. "and two, you look like a depressed kitten."

"A kitten?"

"What I'm trying to say is that you look pathetic and I can't have you be in my company if you're going to look like that. We are Creators, Maya. Do your best to remember that." He fixed me with a mock glare, folding his thick muscled arms as if to emphasize his point.

It felt as if he threw a bucket of cold water over my head, which he probably would do if he could. I met his gaze and gave him a solid nod.

I am a Creator, act like it.

"Good, now you're going to go change into some riding gear." I blinked slowly at him in confusion while he carefully widened his stance. I noticed for the first time that he was wearing his usual riding gear, a pair of worn brown boots, white breeches, and a fitted emerald green sleeveless shirt. Around once bicep was a braided leather band that I had never seen before. I poked at the band with one finger, "That's new."

His entire face lit up and his signature mischievous look came into place, "Oh that? That was a thank you gift from my lady friend." He waggled his eyebrows, "I showed her this new position last nig-"

"Oh my god, stop talking!" I shoved him away from me and turned to head back to my tent to change ignoring his obnoxious snorts of laughter.

In ten minutes, I had changed out of the ruined dress, placing what was left of it outside my tent in as neat of fold as possible. I replaced it with a pair of maroon leggings and a crème tunic, cinched at my waist with a brown belt. My brown riding boots replaced the dainty slippers. Ed was already waiting for me with a strip of black cloth in his hands. "Give me the necklace."

I raised a brow in question, "I thought you told me to keep wearing it?"

"Just trust me." I pulled my hair to side, it had grown down to my lower back now and even pulled back with a leather strip it fell to just below my shoulder blades, and lifted the necklace over my head.

"We can't have anyone accusing me of cheating, now can we?"

"Wha-?" Ed cut me off by turning me around and tying the cloth to block my vision.

"Now no peaking or using your magic to scope things out. A surprise is a surprise." Ed led me by grasping my upper arm with a firm hold before I could even think of protesting. We walked for a while, from easily walkable terrain to longer grasses that were not as worn down.

Surprise! "Surprise!" Two voices shouted in my head along with Ed as he ripped off the cloth from around my head. I was momentarily blinded by the light before I saw Ellie and Aphrodite in all their groomed glory. Someone had braided Aphrodite's mane and tail meticulously, the saddle and bridle we had been using was oiled to perfection. Ellie sat next to her, her fur brushed out and glossy. Truthfully I couldn't even think of words to say.

I know, I look good, as if to prove her point Aphrodite tossed her head and let out a confident whinny. The mare was posing, flexing her long neck to peer at me. Ellie snorted in my head but remained silent instead cocking her head to the side in rolling her tongue out in a wolfish grin.

"Tadaaaaa" Ed sweeped his arm out and gestured to his masterpiece. In a grassy knoll behind him stood jumps crafted out of wood and earth, he had made my own personal arena. And most of all it reminded me of home, of Carrie, and my students, and everything I was missing. The first tear that slipped down my cheek caught me by surprise, but the others to follow were welcome. I flung my arms around my brother and hugged him as hard as I could. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Now I talked to some elves about this and it piqued their interest but for once I'll understand if you don't want to show of your skills and instead keep this place to yourself." He shrugged, "But at the same time I totally bet those elves you'd kick their asses so hard they'd go crying to Galadriel so…"

A force of adrenaline ran through my body as I thought about competing. Truthfully it had been years since I did it last, but it had always been one of my favorite things, "You better tell them to get ready of biggest ass whipping of their lives." Ed smirked.

"Oh yes! This is why I totally keep you around. Best. Sister. Ever!" He shoved me towards Aphrodite and ran towards the woods to supposedly get the elves.

I ran my fingers along Ellie's velvety muzzle and kissed Aphrodite on her nose. Life sucks right now but I am so grateful I have you guys.

With a final pat on Ellie's head, I hoisted myself into the saddle and relaxed. I ran Aphrodite through some brief warm ups, allowing her to elongate her strides and stretch her muscles.

"Maya!" Ed waved his arms over his head like a maniac, "A few people wanted to watch, I hope you don't mind!" Behind Ed seemed to be the entire population of Lothlorien, bubbling with excitement. Ed jogged up to me with a serious look. "I'm serious about not embarrassing me." He poked me in the calf and gestured behind him. "Now you're competing against three elves, you're going last. Now wipe the floor with their asses."

"Oh, I intend to." I set my brother the best wicked grin I could muster before urging Aphrodite into a study canter towards the other competitors. Behind me Ed was addressing the crowd getting audible cheers out of them.

"You are Maya, yes?" I looked up to see a male elf, with hair so blonde it was nearly silver, staring back at me. He had eyes as green as the leaves on the trees, they twinkled with mischief. He was lean and muscled and had a jaw that could cut like a knife.

"Yes and you are…?"

"The winner." The ellon winked in my direction and steered his black stallion away with a laugh.

Why that little…

Focus, we got this.

Aphrodite snorted and pawed at the ground. She leaned backwards stretching the muscles in her hind end. I could feel the excited energy bounce between us through the bond.

"Ladies and gentlemen, elves and hobbits, welcome to my equine competition." Ed threw open his arms with a smirk. "Today we shall watch three competitors take on my jumping course and…my dear sister! May their souls rest in peace when she's done with them."

Cheering ensued from the crowd, I spied the hobbits standing on the rail bouncing with joy. "Now first up…"

Ed called up the name of the first rider, drowned out by the cheers of the crowd. The blonde haired elleth rode out on a chestnut mare that still looked green. The horse threw her head and nearly jerked the reins out of her rider's hands. They were both radiating nervous energy and when Ed yelled for them to start, the mare nearly unseated her rider with how fast she took off. They made it over the first few jumps sloppily, but when they turned to make it to the fourth jump the mare shied away sending the rider up and over her head. The elleth got up in an instant brushed off her clothes and waved at the crowd.

The next rider to go was dirty blonde haired ellon. He was small and appeared to be just a teenager but judging by elf that probably meant he had a few hundred maybe a few thousand years on me. The ellon was riding a black and white spotted stallion who pranced in place. Ed shouted his mark for them to begin. They easily cleared the first jump but instead of turning towards the second jump the horse yanked the reins out of the boy's hands and galloped away from the jumps. I coughed a laugh into my hand.

We have no competition. Aphrodite practically whined.

We've been doing this longer than they have. Aphrodite merely swished her tail in annoyance.

The confident ellon was up next. Hi silver hair flashed in the sunlight and his black mount quivered under his touch. The elf leaned forward and whispered something in his stallion's ear causing the horse to rotate his ears in response. Ed called his start and the ellon whooped in excitement, leaning forward to urge his stallion onwards. He and his horse practically moved as one, he took to the course with all the ferocity of riding into battle. I had to admit he was good, not as good as Aphrodite and I of course, but with some practice he could actually be considered competition. He at least finished the course, with a few downed rails, but he finished, nonetheless, the smirk he sent me showed he could care less that he knocked anything down, he was smiling as if he won. He shot me a wink as he rode by.

"With some practice you could actually be competition." I voiced.

"I consider myself the winner to be basking in your glory," I felt my jaw go slack and my eyes widened at his shameless flirting. "I hope to see you again Creator." With a wink the mystery elf turned his steed away and trotted off.

Well that was certainly interesting.

"Maya you're up." Ed called, from his post in front of the crowd. The hobbits were next to him nearly bouncing with excitement, well Merry, Pippin, and Sam were. Frodo was smiling softly next to them. Alongside, surprisingly was Boromir, it was a rarity to see him anywhere out of camp, but for once he seemed almost relaxed. Aragorn stood next to him, still carrying the look of a ranger despite wearing fine clothes and washed hair. And next to him was the elf I was avoiding, along his side was the elleth from before.

Focus, Maya. It is just you and me now. I pulled my eyes and took a deep breath focusing on my bond with Aphrodite. I pulled on her strength and determination.

Ed called out his signal to start, I snapped my eyes open and circled Aphrodite into a canter. Once my eyes landed on the first jump all other thoughts left my mind, besides my communication with Aphrodite and our focus on the course. We became one mind, one heart pumping, a Creator and her mount. With each jump we flew over I barely batted an eye. We cross over one jump and we were already angled towards the next. With every jump I felt myself forget.

I forgot the pain. The pain from overworked muscles, long workouts, punches, kicks, cuts, bruises. I forgot the pain of heartache from Legolas and from home. I let myself fly with Aphrodite.

By the end of the course Aphrodite and I were both quivering with adrenaline. I couldn't help but laugh as I dismounted and threw my arms around Aphrodite's neck. She affectionately butted her head against mine and tucked her head around my back. The cheering of the crowd around my brought me back to reality and I connected my gaze with Ed's own. I mouthed a quick 'thank you' and he shot me a wink.

"What do you think shall we raise the jumps?" My brother was goading the crowd, but he was facing me. "Unless you think you're out of practice?" His face was a clear challenge. After pawed at the ground and shifted her body towards my own. That was all the answer I needed from her.

I smirked in my brother's direction, "Raise them." With a smirk and a wave of his hand he did.

I had run my brother's course until Aphrodite, and I were both coated in a thick layer of sweat but we were both full of joy from doing something so familiar to us. It had been one of the most thoughtful things anyone had ever done for me, next to the sword and shield the blonde elf I was purposely avoiding gave me.

After having my fill of the course, I had bathed and groomed out Aphrodite leaving her to a well-earned meal, then I had gone to bathe myself. I returned to camp to find excitedly chatting hobbits. We chatted well into the night, over dinner, then back at the camp until Aragorn pulled us away. The ranger regarded me with a serious look, one that immediately leeched away my joy, after all I knew what that look meant. My eyes flickered to Frodo and I felt dread pool in my stomach.

"We have much to discuss, my friends." His hair was clean and brushed out neatly to his shoulders and he had recently trimmed his beard. He gestured with his hands to follow him. The hobbits still chattered amicably, not sensing what I could.

Aragorn led us a staircase that wrapped around a thick, old tree. The railings were covered in ivy and moss grew between the steps. Around halfway up the tree he turned right onto a lantern lit path that diverged away from rather brightly lit talans that littered Lόthlorien, but instead towards a more secluded path. As we walked along the quiet pathway, the hobbits had quieted down, sensing the more tense energy as we moved further and further away from the heart of the city. We came to a lone platform decorated with silver lanterns glimmering silently in the night. A wooden fence surrounded the platform and several chairs were arranged in a circle that reminded me of Rivendell and the fateful day the fellowship was formed.

Upon our arrival Legolas, Boromir, and Gimli rose up from their seats. My brother was there too, he had his back to us hunched over the fence. The muscles in his arms flexed as if coiled to strike an unseen opponent. Aragorn gestured for us to sit but I moved to stand next to my brother resting my back against the railing. Ed didn't even shoot me a glance, instead his eyes were pinched shut and he had his chin tucked to his chest. A thin sheen of sweat was building up on his forehead, small droplets slid down to innocently drip off his chin.

Concern flowed through me but none of the others seemed to be bothered by it, perhaps he had been in this position for a while. I flitted my gaze back towards the rest of the fellowship landing my gaze on Legolas. He was already staring at me with an open gaze like he was trying to tell me something with his eyes. He looked tense, he was barely sitting in his chair instead he was perched on the edge as if he was going to get up at any moment. He held his spine ramrod straight and for the first time he actually looked razzled. His hair wasn't its usual perfection, loose hairs were free floating and the whites of his eyes were pink as if he hadn't been sleeping, well as much as an elf needed sleep. I flexed my jaw and held back the urge to either run or hurl a fireball at his face. Betrayal and hurt swam up and tightened their dark grip around my heart threatening to rip the already bleeding organ to shreds. I held my gaze though and granted him the most neutral expression I could muster.

Aragorn let out a deep sigh pulling everyone's attention towards himself, well everyone except Ed. I let my gaze slide over to the ranger. "It is time for us to move forward." The hobbits physically deflated, their smiles from earlier long gone. "We have stayed long enough, we have drawn too much attention to these woods. We leave in two days."

No one dared protest, after all our time here had been a gift that never expected. With Gandalf's loss our morale had been in shambles and Lόthlorien had aided in soothing some of that sadness. Ed shifted next to me, he wiped the sweat off his forehead with the back of his forearm and spun on his heel in one smooth motion. "I will not be going with you." He spoke as if he hadn't just been in some sort of trance. I felt myself suck in an involuntary sharp breath, like the air had just been knocked free from my lungs. I knew he wouldn't stay, he didn't pledge himself to the fellowship like I had but that didn't stop old feelings from reappearing. He had left once before and I hadn't seen him for years, what was stopping that from happening again? I fluttered my hands nervously at my sides and shoved away the wave of emotions that was threatening to drown me. As if could sense my trail of thoughts he inclined his head towards my own and whispered under his breath, "You'll be seeing me soon enough, Nuka." He reached forward and placed his large rough hand on my shoulder and gave it a tight squeeze. "It will not be like before." A flicker of emotion passed through his eyes that I couldn't identify and I could feel myself frown in response.

"We will spend tomorrow preparing for our leave. The Lady and Lord have kindly gifted us provisions and wish to see us off. We will then travel down the Anduin. Maya, will Aphrodite and Ellie be capable in traveling with us?"

I nodded towards the ranger, "They will have no trouble, they can travel in the forest and Aphrodite can mask their trail."

"Very well, I suggest everyone gets some rest." Boromir silently got up and quickly made his way back to camp. The Steward was not nearly as relaxed as before, instead he flew as if ghosts chased him. I quietly watched the man until he disappeared from view, silently reminding myself of the promise I had to fulfill.

"I leave now." I jerked my head up and met my brother's gaze. His eyes were bloodshot, and his hair stuck to his sweat-slicked forehead. "I have been summoned by the others, I cannot linger here any longer."

"Why can't you leave when we do?" I probably sounded like a child, but Ed had helped me reclaim myself and my powers. He was my sturdy rock to clasp onto in the darkness.

Ed clasped my shoulder and leaned forward, "There is much you still do not know Nuka, and I am sorry I cannot be there when you find out." He leaned forward and placed the necklace of the brotherhood over my head, "Talk to the elf Maya." I opened my mouth to protest but he cut me off, "Trust met." He leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on my forehead, something that was so unlike my brother I was too shocked to say anything in response. Instead I watched my brother walk away from me, away from Lothlorien, and towards the rest of my family.

My heart felt like it missed it a beat, pulling a painful shudder in my chest that caused me to gasp quietly.

You better come back.

"Maya?" I turned my gaze to Legolas, who now stood alone five feet away from me, almost leaning forward like he wanted to step closer, but something was holding him back.

Probably me.

Truthfully I wanted to just walk back to camp, curl up in a ball in my tent, and cry myself to sleep. I wanted to cry about Ed leaving, I wanted to cry about home and Carrie, I wanted to cry for Frodo who was stuck with the ring, but I wanted to cry most of all because I had fallen for the one person I knew I could never have.

I am a Creator, be strong.

With a shuddering breath, I stepped to face Legolas fully and somehow, I ended up in his arms, and his soft tortuous lips were on mine again. One of his hands were on my cheek, his thumb stroking softly along the bone, and his other hand was gripping my waist and pulling me closer.

For one brief beautiful moment I let myself kiss him back.

Betrothed. Gwilwileth. Stop.

I shoved myself out of his arms, severing the kiss and without even consciously thinking about it my hand met his cheek and an audible 'crack' echoed amongst the trees around us.

"What do you think you're doing?" I seethed. Legolas was just staring at me his eyes wild, "You're betrothed, you made sure to show her off in front of me! How dare yo-"

"Maya please listen to m-"

"You don't get to Maya please me," He was still standing so close, our chests were practically touching, like I was a moth drawn to fire. Both a terrible decision. "You HAVE A BETROTHED!" I flung my hands forward to push at his chest, but he caught them pulling me flush against him.

"We are no longer betrothed."

"I mean what did you expect me to do, wait what?" He was staring calmly at me despite the fact he had a large red handprint imprinted on the left side of his face that I had put there.

"We broke off our betrothal."

My mind felt like it was working in overdrive like he shoved a ridiculous math equation in front of me and told me to solve it right there and then. "You broke off your engagement?"

"Our betrothal was one of convenience arranged by my father and her parents, should we not find another."

"I-I don't understand."

"I sought out Gwilwileth as soon as I was able to. We established long ago that we could not marry one another if our hearts belonged elsewhere, she had fallen for an ellon one of the galadhrim, I believe Haldir's brother Rúmil. And I could not marry her not when I have you."

"You have me?" I repeated slowly. One of his fingers softly caressed my clasped hands that were still enclosed in his own. Somehow we had moved so our lips were mere inches apart. Our noses brushed tentatively against each other.

"Gwilwileth and I have known each other for many years. We are friends but that is all."

This time when he leaned in to kiss me I didn't slap him.