I Bite My Thumb At Thee

Here is the disclaimer:

I, paperdress, own none of the unfortunate characters involved in my story. They belong to either Kishimoto Masashi (Naruto) or Ohba Tsugumi (Death Note).

Enjoy!

Chapter 1 - All Begins with Episode 03

L was the greatest detective the world had ever seen.

He had single handily solved cases the rest of the world came to a dead end with.

He had never been beaten – never!

And it wasn't about to start now.

Especially by an anonymous tip.

'Kira is a student.'

Delicately holding the scrap of tattered paper in his fingers, L analysed it so intensely, inspecting it any longer would bear a hole through the fragile piece of paper. Despite all his concentration however, L couldn't discover a single thing – no fingerprints, nothing.

"... as for L's special request to investigate the estimated times of death, by Japanese time, weekdays from 4pm to 2am, and especially between 8pm and midnight are when 68% of the murders happened. On Saturdays, Sundays, and holidays, they are dispersed fairly evenly from 11am until late at night."

He swivelled his attention around to the Police force, and the data that had been announced confirmed it all. Kira was a student, and an anonymous tipper had known that before he did.

"That is extremely interesting information. It is possible, judging from the estimated times of death that the culprit is a student."

Something someone else had discovered before he did.

Ding, ding, ding, L:0, anonymous tipper:1.

Faintly tracing the uneven indents of the wooden floor with his index finger, he voiced his beliefs to the men.

"That's not all. Since he is only killing criminals, we can deduce that the culprit is acting based on his own sense of justice. It's possible that he is trying to become something like god."

Human lives are not to be taken so lightly. What right does Kira have to judge people?

"I have no choice but to call this extremely immature psychology."

Voices of disbelief filled the assembly.

"But... that's impossible"

"It's possible, even if we don't want to believe it."

No man wanted to believe that more than 50 murders could have been executed by a student – a mere child.

"What I just said was only a possibility. But please abandon the stubborn idea that the culprit couldn't possibly be a student. That is the swiftest path to Kira's arrest."

Whilst the word 'possibility' may have reassured some of the men, L knew it was no possibility; it was a certainty.

"Please continue the report on the investigation."

A single thought occupied L's mind, 'who sent the tip?' for although there were several ways of deriving to the conclusion that 'Kira is a student', there was a slight chance that it may unmask the identity of Kira. The ways of derivation were; one, it was a fluke or a prank. Two, by using the statistical data and by deducing; the method L chose. Three, the anonymous tipper knew who Kira was. And lastly, Kira himself sent the anonymous tip. If the conclusion was derived from either three or four, catching Kira just became that much easier.

L had to find out who sent the note.

3 hours and 29 minutes ago, Watari handed to him a piece of ragged paper with the words 'Kira is a student' scrawled on it in barely legible writing, so bad in fact that L nearly wondered whether to decipher it as a code. On the other side were the words 'To L'. When Watari was inquired of where it was acquired, he had not much to say. Apparently it was stuck to a packet of marshmallows with sticky tape, and seeing the words 'To L' and 'Kira is a student', Watari couldn't ignore it, and so he brought it over.

How in the name of God did the anonymous sender know it was going to get to L?

"...That's it for today's report on the investigation. L."

The sudden address by the chief snapped L out of his reverie, and he focused his gaze on the monitor.

"Thank you very much. I feel like we've come a little closer to the culprit."

How does Kira murder a victim without laying a finger on them? And why are there some who he can't kill? Thinking back to his confrontation with Kira, L suppressed a smirk as he remembered how much information he gained from that single moment. Kira needed a real name and a face to kill. Wanting to just confirm that was correct, L passed out a request to the Police force.

"And, I have one more request. Squads investigating victims, media, and the internet, I would like you to take another look into what sort of media coverage the victims got in Japan. What I'd like to know is whether or not there were pictures or footages of the victims' faces. Thank you."

And with that, the assembly was dismissed, allowing L to focus solely on his thoughts.

Relocating to a more comfortable surface than a wooden floor, L waited for Watari to return.

Fuelled by his competitiveness, he was determined to find out who the anonymous tipper was. He had lost once, and he wasn't going to lose a second time.

Upon Watari's return, he began his search.

"Watari, could you get into your possession the surveillance tape for the place you found the note?"

Watari was an angel sent from heaven. Within an hour he got a copy of the video for the day, and prepared him his uh, dinner consisting entirely of calories and nothing but calories.

The calories must be doing something, for L had just gained back the point he lost. L:1, anonymous tipper:1.

At 07:48 that morning, a figure sluggishly walked into the supermarket, fiddling with his distinct gray high school uniform, and went over to the confectionery section. Upon arriving, it seemed that he noticed the security camera, for he stared straight at it, shrugged his shoulders and sighed. He probably knew that L would be looking for him now and that he would be found. Uttering something out, he took out the note and some sticky tape, attaching it to the back of a packet of marshmallows. Then, with another sigh, he left.

This boy was going to be easy to find. Not only did he announce which school he was attending, he also had a distinct feature which was extremely recognisable – a spiky ponytail very much resembling a pineapple.

At this point, L ruled out the fact that this may be Kira, for this boy didn't seem to take much care that there was a surveillance camera filming everything, albeit being a bit annoyed.

With a bit of hacking into the school database, L found who he was looking for – a freshman by the name of Nara Shikamaru. Upon looking at his grades, L was confounded. Perhaps the boy had come to the conclusion that Kira was a student by sheer luck, for his grades didn't seem to reflect anything at all. It was either that or he knew who Kira was. The two seemed to be the most probable answer by looking through his entry. And with a possibility that the boy knew who Kira was, L couldn't ignore it.

Consuming his sugary lump, L began to plan a mission for Watari.

Something troublesome was going to happen.

He could feel it.

"How troublesome."

He should have never bothered.

L would have figured it out at some stage.

So why did he bother again?

Because people were being murdered out there and he wanted it to stop.

He wanted peace back.

"Shika, what's with the non-stop sighing? It's freaking me out!"

Turning to the blonde girl next to him, Shikamaru noted how the teacher had picked up her attempted hushed whispering. He didn't really care whether or not the teacher was sending death glares down their way, but he opted to reply silently anyways; he just shook his head.

He wanted to sleep.

And so he did.

As Shikamaru's head popped into the space created by his arms, the teacher faintly shook her head, her violet tresses swaying slightly. At the start of the year, when she first met the lazy teen, she bothered to throw pieces of chalk at him when he fell asleep. Now, she just let the slacker sleep his way through class, because no matter what she hurled his way, he just kept sleeping, day after day. She swore he had the soul of an old man; once, she witnessed him and Asuma playing shougi. Shougi!

She continued on with the rest of her lesson until she was interrupted by Asuma who was at the door.

"Sorry to interrupt your lesson, Anko –"

"Don't worry, you're not interrupting much. Come in. What is it?"

Walking into the classroom, with his head nearly brushing the doorway, Asuma looked around the class. Shikamaru was napping again.

Clearing his throat, hoping that Shikamaru would wake up, Asuma delivered his message.

"The principal just wants to let you kids know that the seniors have their college entry exams coming up. It's the most important period in their high school careers, so don't disturb them. Got it everyone?"

Unmotivated nods and yeses came his way, which he had to be satisfied with. At least he got some sort of a response from the freshmen, unlike the juniors who didn't seem to care at all for their seniors.

With a sigh and a shake of his head, Asuma thanked Anko and made his way over to the next class to deliver his message.

All this sighing made him feel old.

He needed a break – and a cigarette.

Anko continued her lesson to the half-dead kids, inwardly excited for the weekends – she was going to get drunk!

Like all her other weekends.

But still, the prospect made her all jiggly.

As the bell rang signalling the end of the day, Anko made her final address to the class for the week, slamming her hand onto her desk.

"Listen up kids! Now don't die over the weekends, 'cause that kills my only source of entertainment! Otherwise, have a good weekend!"

And with that and a flick of her hair, she strode through the door humming to herself, with the tail of her light tan trench coat following her faithfully.

"Yeh! Weekends!"

"Oi, Shika, wake up!"

Being shook continuously by Ino, Shikamaru finally opened his eyes, taking in the half-abandoned classroom.

"Eh? Ino, what is it?"

"School's over lazy ass! Let's go meet the others!"

Without a chance to reply, Shikamaru was dragged outside by an excited Ino.

"Hey look, there they are! Hi! Sorry we're late but Shika decided to go into hibernation mode!"

"How troublesome."

"LET'S GO EAT RAMEN GUYS!"

"Hell no."

"Why not?"

"N-naruto-kun, Sakura-chan wanted to go karaoke."

"Oh. LET'S GO KARAOKE THEN!"

"We already decided to do that idiot."

"Woof!"

"Ah, they're here."

"Yosh! I feel the flame of youth in everyone!"

"Shut up."

"Please, Lee, you're driving me crazy."

"So karaoke it is?"

With a unanimous decision, the group made their way towards their favourite karaoke place.

"Hey look! Kira killed more criminals!"

Seeing the other civilians pointing at the giant screen outside the skyscraper, the kids halted for a moment, taking in the news broadcast that was taking place.

Kira had slaughtered more people.

And the rest of the world seemed to be cheering.

"Do you think what Kira is doing is r-right?"

The barely audible words got everyone's attention and got them thinking for a little while.

"It can't be right killing all those people, but... but the world seems to be getting gradually better."

With slight turned heads, everyone looked at Tenten – and agreed.

"It's wrong for Kira to kill people, I mean, criminals are still people right? What right does Kira have to kill? But like what Tenten said, it's making the world a better place."

They had assumed hushed whispers, for nothing good could happen if the outside world heard their conversation.

The rest of their journey to karaoke was in silence; everyone was still questioning Kira's actions and the result of it on the world.

However, once they actually got to karaoke, they mutually agreed to put that aside and have the time of their lives. Blasting the music, screeching the lyrics out with all their voices, jumping from chair to table and table to chair, they soon forgot about their deep and meaningful discussion, and resumed being normal high school kids.

By the time they finished, the sky was invaded by a tinge of pink, and the growling of their stomachs had begun.

Bidding each other a safe weekend, they each made their home, wondering what was for dinner.

The sun set quickly, and soon the sky was devoid of any colour.

As Shikamaru enjoyed the chill of the air on his heat-streaked face, something still nagged at him from the back of his mind.

It was that troublesome feeling.

But he didn't regret doing anything he did.

After that conversation with the rest of his friends, Shikamaru knew what he had done was right, although he had told nobody of it.

As he turned the corner to his block, his stomach tightened into knots, and his suspicions were confirmed.

Damn, maybe he should have thought ahead and actually planned something when he sent the anonymous note.

After all, it was out of impulse he wrote the note and left it where it was going to get to L.

Upon catching sight of Shikamaru, a dark silhouette stirred about in the shadows.

"Nara Shikamaru."

That wasn't a question requesting confirmation for his identity; it was more of a statement.

Like 'I know who you are so don't bother running.'

As if Shikamaru would have bothered running anyway.

With a sigh, he uttered out his practically trademarked catchphrase.

"How troublesome."

That's it for Chapter 1!

If there are any errors within that chapter, feel free to let me know!

Otherwise... REVIEW (:

PS. just in case you haven't realised yet, but the Episode 03 thing refers to the anime, which is the one I'm following for this fic.

xoxo paperdress