JC 619 Appears with a birthday hat and a noisemaker. Okay today (July 20) is my Birthday. Blows noisemaker. Anyway, Here is a Comical Author Fighters Fic that I hope everyone will atleast find whimsical. Enjoy! I only own myself.
It was a usual Warm Summer day, 98 Degrees outside the Old Movie Theater. Standing outside where a Bunch of Tweens,Teens, Young Adults, and Adults. Indiviually they are pretty impressvie Folks with special abilities, but together they are known as the Author Fighters.
"Well DP, It is swell that you are taking everybody to the Movies today." said Hikari Ino to her Boy Friend Dark Paladinmon, Leader of The Author Fighters.
"I'm hoping that this will go better than the trip to the Baseball Game we took back in June." said Dark Paladinmon.
(Cutaway to Author)
Hi JC 619 here. Okay, I'm gonna level with you here. I had an Idea for a Joke cutaway like in Family Guy, but it didn't really pan out. Basically, The AF end up getting in a Massive Fan Riot, and are about to be badly injured or worse. Suddenly Airnaruto45, and I decided to put our differences aside (He's a Yankees Fan, I'm a Phillies Fan), and save the day. I thought it was gonna be good, but it puttered. Enjoy the Rest of the Fic.
(End Cutaway)
While DP, and Hikari were waiting in line, The other Authors were checking out the Movie Posters specifically Charles Roberts, and Tal Ordo.
"You know it's kinda odd, Megan Fox used to be in nearly every Movie almost 2 Years ago." said Tal Ordo.
"Yeah, and now she ain't even starring in her own Bio Pic." replied Charles Roberts.
"Really, Who is?" asked Tal.
"Joan Rivers suprisingly." answered Charles Roberts making Tal shudder abit.
Charles then sees an odd Movie Poster.
"Check it out, Marchie of the Peguins." said Charles as he showed Tal the Poster which featured Peguins playing Musicial Instruments, and one wearing a weird Hat.
"Hmm... Kind reminds me of Ar... said Tal Ordo before being interrupted by Dark Paladinmon.
"Okay everyone, I have bought the Tickets for the Movie. The Movie begins in 20 Minues so get some Snacks, Play some Arcade Games, and Use the Rest Rooms now." announced Dark Paladinmon to his fellow friends.
The AF then all enter the Theater when suddenly an Alarm goes off.
"Freeze!" said Cheif Wiggum who was working Security today as he then points to the Author Fighters.
"What's wrong sir?" asked Dark Paladinmon.
"You, Up against the Wall." said Wiggum to Roscoso.
"Huh?" asked a confused Roscoso as he was then searched by Wiggum. The Guard then finds something in Roscoso's Pocket.
"Care to explain this?" said Wiggum as he showed Roscoso a Bag of Gummi Bears.
"Sorry, but you guys don'y carry my Favorite Kind of Gummi Bears." replied Roscoso.
"How do you sleep at night?" said Wiggum in a disappointed tone.
After the incident, The AF all spilt up to go do their things. Some were getting Snacks, Some were playing Games, and some were using the Rest Room (Don't expect any Stories there, I don't really do Bathroom Humor).
Kitten Hachi- chan, Phoenix of Darkness, and wildrook were in the Snack Bar Line waiting behind a rather "Portly" Woman wearing a Green Dress with Goofish Red Hair named Amanda Banshee (Wacky World of Tex Avery).
"I shall have an Extra Large Pop Corn with Double Butter, and Double Salt, Nachos, 3 Boxes of Malted Milk Balls, 2 Boxes of Licorice, and a Diet Cola. I due have to watch my Girlish Figure." said Amanda.
Kitten giggled at this slightly until Amanda stared at her with Malice.
"Are you laughing at me?" asked Amanda.
"Umm... No, I was thinking of a Funny Joke I heard." replied Kitten.
"Oh really?, Tell me it then." ordered Amanda.
"Okay. A Priest, A Rabbi, and A Buddhist are in the woods each trying to convert a Bear..." said Kitten until a Fly wearing a small Derby Hat, and Gloves flys by them,
and lands on the Popcorn Amanda ordered.
"Boy, anymore Salt & we would have a Pillar of it." joked Freddie the Fly.
"Time to die Fly." yelled Amanda as she runs after Freddie the Fly leaving the Line. wildrook goes up to the Desk.
"One Large Popcorn with Butter, and a Medium Soda Pop please." said wildrook.
Jeremy Freedman (The Sqeaky Voiced Teen from The Simpsons) gives wildrook the Popcorn, and Soda but without Butter.
"Where's the Butter?" asked wildrook.
"You're supposed to put the Butter on it. said Jeremy.
wildrook looks at the Butter Dispenser, and sees that it is pretty dirty unlike the one near the Teen which is Clean.
"Can't you put the Butter on it?" asked wildrook.
"You're supposed to put the Butter on it. reinterated Jeremy.
"But it's all grimey, I'm not gonna do it." said wildrook.
"Why not, It's easy." said Jeremy.
"Because I'm not working in this here Movie Theater that's why!" ansered wildrook.
"You're supposed to put the Butter on it." again stated Jeremy.
"When I go to McBurger Town, and ask for a Cheeseburger, They don't make me put the Cheese on it do they?" asked wildrook.
"You're supposed to put the Butter on it." said Jeremy Freedman yet again.
"And you're supposed to clean your hands after using the Restroom." stated wildrook as he saw Jeremy's hands.
"Touche." said Jeremy as he filled the Popcorn with Butter, and gave it to wildrook again.
wildrook payed, and ate some of it happily as Phoenix, and Kitten look abit disgusted.
"Suddenly, I just lost my appetite." said Phoenix of Darkness.
Meanwhile, Lunatic121 sees a Black Haired Asian Teen named Stacy Hirano giving Free Samples.
"Free Samples of our Movie Candy?" said Stacy.
"Sure." said Lunatic as he sampled some Candy.
"Yummy, I'll consider buying this." said Lunatic was he then left.
A minute later, Lunatic then appears wearing a Big pair of Glasses, a Big Nose, and a Push Broom style Mustache.
"Oh, May I?" asked Lunatic in a Lower Tone.
Lunatic samples the Candy.
"Delicious, Good day." said Lunatic as he leaves again.
A minute later, Lunatic appears wearing Lederhosen, and a Swiss Hat.
"Autobahn, Brachen-Strudle." said Lunatic in a Swiss Accent.
Lunatic then samples the Candy.
"Cuckoo Clock, Swiss Miss." said Lunatic as he left for a third time.
A minute later, Lunatic appears wearing a Cowboy Outfit.
"Howdy there Parner, May I try someof that there Candy?" said Lunatic in a Texan Accent.
Lunatic then samples the Candy.
"Thanks there little lady, I'll buy afew for my Cowpoke Pals." said Lunatic.
"You know you don't have to keep going to the back of the line, You can take as many as you want they're Free." explained Stacy.
"What in the Sam Hill are you talkin about?" asked Lunatic until the real Lunatic, Big Nose Lunatic, and Swiss Lunatic appear behind them. Revealing that Lunatic wasn't dressing up.
"Hey can I have another Sample?" asked Lunatic.
"Same here, That was good stuff." said the Big Nosed Lunatic.
"Chocolate, Hasslehoff." said The Swiss Lunatic.
At the Arcade Shadow-DJ, and TLSouldude were playing a Jet Shooter Video Game.
"Oh Snap, My Left Deflecter's been Damaged." said Shadow-DJ.
"Use your Phasers." said TLSouldude.
"I can't, I'm currently in Hyper Space!" said Shadow-DJ.
"Then use the Photon Torpedos on them." said TLSouldude.
"You're Nuts, Galactus feeds on Photon energy." said Shadow-DJ.
Just then, The Nostalgia Critic walks in on the duo.
"Really, Cause it looks like Afterburner. The Game about Jets, and not Space Aliens." said Nostalgia Critic.
"Hold on, I'll take it out." said TLSouldude as he jumps in on the Game.
"You're crazy, Galactus is unbeatable." said Shadow-DJ.
"It's Afterburner." said an annoyed Nostalgia Critic.
"Give it up Galactus, I'm gonna crush you." said an determined TLSouldude.
"It's AFTerBurnER!" said a more annoyed Nostalgia Critic.
"Game Over, Devourer our Worlds!" said TLSouldude.
"It's Goshdarn Afterburner, It was made in 1987 by the Sega Corporation, Afterburner, Afterburner, AFTERBURNER!" yelled Nostalgia Critic.
TLSouldude then defeats the Game as a White then appears on top of the Machine.
"Dude you saved the Galaxy." congradulated Shadow-DJ.
"Afterburner!" yelled Nostalgia Critic.
"Hey there Nostalgia Critic, What are you doing here?" asked TLSouldude.
"There's a Don Bluth Movie Marathon in Theather #3." replied Nostalgia Critic.
"Oh, Enjoy it then." said Shadow-DJ.
"Thanks." said Nostalgia Critic.
Nostalgia Critic then heads to Theater #3, and sits near the Screen.
"And now our Don Bluth Movie Marathon." said the Movie Announcer.
"This should be good." said Nostalgia Critic smiling.
"Our First Movie is Rock-a-Doodle!...
"What?" yelled Nostalgia Critic.
"Followed by Thumblelina...
"No!" continued The Nostalgia Critic.
"Then A Troll in Central Park...
"No, No, No, No, NO! These are Not the Best of Bluths work, These are Abominations!" roared Nostalgia Critic.
"And finally, The Pebble, and The Peguin." finished the Announcer.
"Well that film I can tolerate." said Nostalgia Critic.
"Okay guys, The Movie is about to begin in Five Minutes so everybody get into Theater #1, and find a Seat." said Dark Paladinmon.
The AF then get into Theater #1, and all begin to get into some seats. On the Movie Screen is a Guess this Actor with a Black Silouette with the Name being ACKJEI NCHA.
Airnaruto45 sees this, and scoffs abit.
"These Questions are super easy, It's obviously Jackie Chan." said Airnaruto45.
Suddenly, The Silouette changes into an Tibetin Man wearing a Skull Cap with his Name being JECKAI HANC.
"Jeckai Hanc?, Who the heck is he?" asked Airnaruto45.
"Oh Jeckai Hanc!, He's Tibet's version of Seth Rogen." said Kamen Rider DIBRAVE.
"Yeah, He was in that one awesome Action Zombie Flick with Chris McLain." added Dark Kiva.
"Oh, and Less we forget that suprisingly enjoyable Rom Com with Pop Diva Britney Britney." added Lion's Edge.
Suddenly, The Theater Room goes dark as the THX Sound System Theme begins to play showing the THX Logo, and phrase "The Audience is Listening". The theme begins to shake the Room, and causes JC 619's Glasses, MistressofDawn's Teeth, an Exit sign, and wildrook's Head to shatter, break, and explode though Rook's Head quickly grows back. The AF then Applaud this.
"Turn it up, Turn it Up!" said Hikari Ino as she couldn't hear it well despite sitting up front next to Dark Paladinmon.
Afew Rows behind them were JC 619, and Jean Kazuhiza.
"You know what my Favorite part about going to a Movie is?" asked JC 619.
"I don't know, The Fact that it's Dark enough to Fart, and no one would ever know it was you?" answered Jean.
"No, The Trailers for Upcoming Movies, Who knows what Cinematic Masterpiece will be shown to us in the Near Future." said a Stoked JC 619.
Suddenly, The Green Screen shows the Line "The Following Trailer has been approved for all audiences. The Screen then shows a Certain Comedic Actor.
Rob Schneider...
Suddenly, JC 619 Pukes onto the Floor.
"Oh Snap!, You okay man?" asked Jean.
"Yeah, I'm fine. I just really hate Rob Shneider Movies." replied JC 619 who was regaining his composure.
Derp de derp. Derp de derpity derpie derp. Until one day, a-derp a-derp a-derp a-derp. Derp de derp, de tittaly tum. From the creators of "DER" and "TUM TA TITTALY TUM TA TOO", Rob Schneider is...
JC 619 Puke again.
"DA DERP DEE DERP DA TEETLEY DERPEE DERPEE DUMB." Rated PG-13.
"Oh God, How I hate his movies." said JC 619.
"Here's another Trailer." said Jean.
The Screen now shows a Hockey Game.
Jimmy's Soccer Team was in Last Place. Show's Jimmy (from EEnE) being scored upon by Nelson easily. "Haw-Haw!, No wonder Your Parents wanna Adopt." said Nelson. Until they brought back an Old School Player, Charlie Sheen is: Hockey Zombie The Screen then shows Charlie Sheen as a Zombie in Hockey Gear shooting the Puck as Rock & Roll Part 2 Plays. "Go Hockey Zombie, You taught me to believe in myself." said Jimmy. During a Time Out, Hockey Zombie getd distracted by an Attractive Fan Girl. "Uh-oh, Didn't the Professor warn us about this?" asked Johnny 2x4. Hockey Zombie's Jaw literally drops to the Ice without him caring. Coming this Christmas.
"Something tells me that Sheen isn't WINNING anymore." replied JC 619.
"Quiet, Here's another Trailer." said Phoenix of Darkness.
The Screen now shows nothing until...
DWAYNE "THE ROCK" JOHNSON...
"AWESOME-SAUCE!" said JC 619 excitedly.
JOHN CENA...
"WICKED MAN!" said Jean excitedly.
HULK HOGAN...
"SUPER MEGA FANTASTIC!" said Airnaruto45 excitedly.
IN... Mr. Gumdrop, and Jimmy Sprinkles visit Candy Mountain. With John Cena voicing Mr. Gumdrop (Mr. Gumdrop is here to everyone a Big Hug), Hulk Hogan as Jimmy Sprinkles (Brother, I love Cute Puppies, and Kitties), and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson as The Chocolate Bunny King (Smell the Delicous Cookies I have Baked for eyerybody.) Mr. Gumdrop, and Jimmy Sprinkles visit Candy Mountain, Produced by WWE Films.
JC, Jean, and Air stand there for the Longest time until...
"DUDE, WE GOTTA GO SEE THAT MOVIE!" screamed JC 619.
"I KNOW, IT'S GONNA BE EPIC!" screamed Jean.
"I SMELL OSCAR NOMINATION!" screamed Airnaruto45.
"Thank goodness this is the Last Trailer." said Roscoso.
The Screen then shows an Old Castle during a Dark, and Stormy Night.
It's Not New, It's Not Original, It's not even very interesting... But it is Coming this Halloween. Inside the Castle, Simon Belmont, and Blade enter a Room with a Casket which they then open. "Allright Dracula, You're in for it now. We're gonna..." said Simon until he, and Blade see what's inside. It's Dracula like you've never seen him before... Dead. The Screen then shows Dracula's Skeleton with a Stake in it's Rib Cage. "Our work here is done." said Simon. "Looks like it." responded Blade. "Get some Bagels?" asked Simon. "Sure." responded Blade as thw two shut the Casket. DRACULA: it's been DONE TO DEATH!
"Yeah, Also known as Twilight!" joked JC 619.
"Um, I think that Joke has been used." replied Kitten.
"Oh good, The Movie's Starting." said DarkPaladinmon.
"Don't be so sure, The Movie Logos make it seem like it's the Movie itself." replied DimensionDude.
The MGM Logo appears with the Lion Roaing like he usually does.
"Okay MGM, Let's see this Thing." said TLSouldude.
Suddenly, A Fin begins to break from the Surface of an Ocean.
"Ohhh, Bet that's a Man-Eating Shark ready..." said Airnaruto45.
It then turns out to be Map appearing, and the Words UnderSea Map Productions Appears benith it.
"Oh nevermind then, I think they did a Matrial Arts Movie once." replied Airnaruto45.
A Long Time Ago... then appears on the Screen.
"Okay, Moo-Vey!" said a Stoked MistressofDawn.
Then the Line Studios appears under it.
"Okay, That's Misleading abit." said MistressofDawn.
Next up, A Limo is shown approaching...
"All right, Someone Big is coming to the City." said wildrook.
Until it turns into it's Logo, Approaching Ride Productions.
"Okay, Enough of that now." said an annoyed wildrook.
The Screen then shows an old City with the Captions being Tokyo, Japan 1954.
"Oh a Period Piece." said Hikari Ino.
Then the Screen Shrinks to reveal Date and Time Productions under it.
"Nevermind on the Period Piece." said Hikari Ino.
Then the Screen shows An Attractive Woman as she walks down an abandoned Sidewalk.
"Oh, Wonder what this Lovely Ladie's Story is all about." pondered JC 619.
Suddenly, It changes to a Black & White Silouette with the Words Attractive Woman Walking Films Presents above it.
"Oh come on!" yelled JC 619.
"Anyway DP, What Movie is this anyway?" asked Hikari Ino.
"Oh, You'll see in 3,2,1..." said DarkPaladinmon as he Pointed to the Screen.
AUTHOR FIGHTERS: THE MOVIE
"Awesome!" yelled the AF in unison.
"But how did you..." asked Hikari Ino before DP interrupted her.
"Hollywood was willing to Pay Big Bucks." replied DarkPaladinmon.
STARRING CHRISTIAN BALE AS DARKPALADINMON,
"Naturally." said DarkPaladinmon.
SCARLETT JOHANSON AS HIKARI INO,
"Sweet." said Hikari Ino.
SETH GREEN, SETH ROGAN, AND SETH MCFARLANE AS THE FICTOR BROTHERS,
"Neato." said Soul, Lunatic, and DimensionDude.
DREW BARRYMOORE AS KITTEN HACHI-CHAN,
"Yeah." said Kitten.
EMMA STONE AS MISTRESSOFDAWN,
"Nice." said MisstressofDawn.
TOBEY MAGUIRE AS JC 619,
"Awesome." said JC 619.
RANDY ORTON AS JEANKAZUHIZA,
"Interesting." said Jean.
SHIA LEBOUF AS AIRNARUTO45,
"Not Bad." said Airnaruto45.
AND TAYLOR SWIFT AS PHOENIX OF DARKNESS.
"Wonderful." said Phoenix.
"Boy this is gonna be Awesome!" said Hikari Ino.
"I can't think of anything that can ruin this." said DarkPaladinmon.
DIRECTED BY UWE BOLL & JOEL SCHUMACHER
"AAAAAAHHHHHHH!" screamed the AF as all of the Member ran out of the Theater except for JC 619.
"I don't really have a strong opinion about those two." said JC 619.
WITH SPECIAL GUEST STAR: ROB SCHNEIDER!
JC 619 then violently Pukes, and runs out of the Theater.
THE END
Well I hope you all enjoyed my Little Fic. If any of the AF Members are offended by this, Then I will give you a Cupcake of Forgiveness. In the Meantime: REVIEW!