Beast Boy moved down the hall quickly and halted abruptly in front of Raven's door, knocking obnoxiously even though he knew she'd probably sensed him there before he'd even made a sound.

"What?" she growled loud enough for him to hear, loud enough to make the statement that she wasn't in the mood.

"We're going for pizza, stop being all gloom and doom and come with." He whined in a playful tone.

Raven winced internally even though she'd never show it; any more of his horrible jokes might kill her. There were many things that Raven disliked but among her least favorite were people going in her room, chickens, her father, and Beast Boy's jokes. Beast Boy on the other hand loved trying to make Raven laugh, eating tofu, making jokes in general, playing practical jokes and videogames among other things.

"No." was her answer, simple enough and she didn't even feel a hint of anger towards him; she felt so in check of her emotions that she was actually content.

"Come on Raven, we need someone there the ruin the party, plus you could use a little fun and laughter." Beast Boy smiled to himself, finding his own humor clever and witty while Raven was still annoyed.

"No." she felt final but he was determined to change her mind.

"Raven, if you don't come it won't feel like we're a team." Then he added, "Plus Star said she wanted all of us together."

Raven felt a soft spot for her friends even if she didn't care to admit it and she really did want to make them happy.

"Fine."

Beast Boy laughed, "Dress to impress, Raven!"

So Raven dressed and made her way to the commons for a cup of tea while everyone congregated.

Starfire fretted over a bad hair day in which the right side of her hair had an odd lump protruding while the other side was perfect as usual.

She looked up in distress, "How will we do the painting of a yellow town tonight if I do not look presentable?"

Robin grinned at her, "It's said 'Paint the town red', Star…"

She looked up carefully, "Well then how can we paint the town red if I do not look presentable, my friends."

Robin shook his head, "You look fine, Star."

The team left once everyone was present. Everyone was in casual wear and comfortable while Raven felt extremely out of place. She preferred the sanctuary of her room in the comfort of her bed with a book in her lap and a cup of warm tea in her hand. Everyone was laughing and carrying on at Beast Boy's humor and grinning at Starfire's strange mannerisms while Raven sat and watched, unable to contribute to the conversation and unable to relate.

Cyborg looked at Beast Boy, "Ok, grass stain, I bet you can't finish the last half in under thirty seconds."

Beast Boy grinned, "Raven, why don't you pretend to be normal and eat something for a change," then he shoved the tray in her direction.

Raven shook her head, annoyed again, "I ate before we left, but if you want to talk about normal why don't we discuss why you pulled the meat off everyone else's pizza…. I wouldn't consider that normal."

Cyborg reached down and took a few slices, "Fine, if no one's eating it then I most certainly will!" and the pizza was gone in a matter of seconds.

The night continued and while Raven teased Beast Boy on occasion she also did the same to Cyborg. Robin insisted on ordering another pizza and let Star choose the toppings which would have appeared to end in disaster if Beast Boy hadn't inhaled it just as fast as she did.

"Beast Boy, it's not that you're being annoying or anything, but if you continue to talk at such a high volume my ears may start to bleed." The statement wasn't unprovoked but it also wasn't necessary.

Beast Boy took offense and glared at her, "Raven, it's not that you're being creepy or anything, but if you could bother to act normal for a moment then I might not mind you being here." he hadn't meant to sound so mean but once it was out there was nothing he could do to change it so he tried to spin it, "I mean… you being here is nice, a good change for you…"

"Friend, Beast Boy, that was unkind." Star murmured from across the table and Robin had the same expression.

Raven stood up and shook her head, "But true… I'm going home."

She needed a second to think so she quickly dissolved into the floor and reappeared in the back of the pizza joint, taking a deep breath to calm her nerves.

Robin sat inside glaring at Beast Boy, "You didn't have to say that to her."

Cy nodded in agreement, "It was a little bit of a low blow, grass stain, just because she's the way she is doesn't mean she doesn't have feelings… after all we've been through together." If anything Cyborg thought of Raven as his little sister and in that way found himself very protective of her.

Beast Boy frowned, "Hey, she's not upset, she'd just rather be in her room then listen to us have a good time, besides, it was all in good fun."

"That was
not in good fun, friend Beast Boy, friend Raven did not find that to be of the fun." Star protested and shook her head.

Cyborg nodded carefully, "I think Rae's had a lot on her mind lately and that didn't help."

Raven pulled herself together enough to walk around the side and head for the street, traffic and noisy people weren't usually her preferred thinking partners but sometimes noise helps quell internal distraction.

She walked swiftly towards the street, still a couple hundred feet away, while meditating hard in her head, concentrating on the state of each individual emotion, learning it's levels and processing what it would take to reign it back in… not that her emotions were even in that much of a state of havoc but more the process was calming all in it's own.

Then suddenly there was a hand over her mouth and an arm wrapped around her waist and she was literally thrown into the wall opposite her and then fell into garbage, before she had the chance to speak her spell or even react at all the hand was over back over her mouth.

She called her powers and nothing came, it was as if they'd never existed in the first place, it was if she was nothing but human.

She shook and fought but whatever held her was strong and angry, shoving her back up against the other wall and pressing all their weight against her thin frame.

She shook her head, trying to free her mouth, and when she finally had the freedom she turned to growl at the person, "Get off."

He shoved her face roughly against the brick, "Shush now."

But she didn't want to be quiet and she shook her head till her mouth was free again, "Azarath Metrion Zinthos!" but nothing happened and no power came to her.

She struggled, failing her now? Her powers were choosing to fail her now?

She shoved against the wall and hit the person with her body, they both fell to the ground and Raven tried again to fly into the air or do something, but still nothing. So she started to crawl towards the street and fear and desperation overtook her mind and soul, wrapping her tightly in a hole and pulling her deeper as the person caught her and pulled her back.

Raven turned over onto her back and kicked what appeared to be a man, her anger flared as he flew back and she quickly moved to stand and started to run… but her legs failed and she was sprawling down onto the ground after a couple feet, cutting her arms and chest against the ground.

Suddenly he was on top of her again with his hand over her mouth, "You're more trouble then you're worth, but I like a little fight."

Her rage boiled, anger thrashing out to every limb in her body and still nothing happened, her powers didn't come and she was left feeling more helpless then ever. Raven knew her power was great and was so shocked of what was happening that she couldn't control herself into being rational.

"Let me go you fucking bastard! I'll end your life for this and cut off your balls!" she'd never spoken in this sort of language, but also had never found herself completely helpless at the hands of a mere human.

He chuckled, "Be quiet or you'll wake the neighbors, but then again you're quite alone and the streets are so loud no one will hear."

"What do you want from me?" Raven growled angrily.

"Nothing much, I'm not a man who asks for much, but when I want a pretty little thing to spread her legs and take it I expect just that, got it?" he answered quickly.

"No." she growled.

His hand wrapped around her neck, "Oh, Yes… I believe you meant yes."

This man thrived on power and control, it wasn't about her, it wasn't about that act, it was about feeling that vital control flow threw him; it was about seeing the fear in her eyes even though she wouldn't admit it.

"Please let me go." The words slipped out and Raven was momentarily shocked. Pleading? She'd survived her father's wrath and beaten him, she'd fought Slade and won, she'd battled countless other enemies, why was a pitiful human causing her to be so helpless?

"Not tonight Sweetheart." He murmured and ripped of her shirt, as he did so she felt the necessary pressure to rip the garment bruise her and the only thing she could think was that the bruises on her back would be easily hidden and if her powers chose to return she could simply heal them herself in moments.

He cut off her jeans with and knife though, pushed them down her legs, pressed her into the wet ground and the gravel ripped open her skin.

Pathetic and weak she was not. She turned her head as she felt him push into her; kicked and growled and bucked to get him off till he punched her so hard in the face she quite literally saw stars and passed out for the few glorious moments.

He finished and ran, thinking he'd won… Raven turned over, anger and rage flaring again and she wished her powers would lash out uncontrollably and kill him.

But nothing happened.

She collected herself, and tried to mediate and found herself unable to levitate, unable to concentrate. So she picked herself up and walked to the street, peering out to see the T-car still there.

The thought of going back inside and crying to her friends crossed her mind for a moment but she didn't want to show weakness, didn't want to show how she'd lost her powers again. She didn't want Star trying to comfort her and she didn't want Robin to run off after a guy she hadn't even gotten a good look at. She didn't want Cyborg running tests on her and she didn't want Beast Boy making jokes about what a failure her powers were.

She didn't want and didn't need them to know; she didn't want or need their support.

So she pulled back up the jeans with the cut off button and broken zipper and she searched to find the jacket she'd dropped. She pulled her hood up to hide her face… she wasn't going to cry.

It was time to be the big girl she knew she was, time to pull away from it all and retract back into her own little world, it was better that way. Raven started walking, trying to clear her head.

Robin walked to Raven's room and knocked, "Raven? Beast Boy is sorry… do you want to talk about it? He was just having fun but that doesn't excuse it… he was just being Beast Boy."

She didn't respond but he hadn't expected her to, "Ok, well, just let me know if I can do anything, we're going to watch and movie and you're welcome to join... if you wanted to bring out a book you could just sit with us."

But she still didn't respond so Robin left her be.

Finally she was home but the rest of the team was already there, she'd had to walk and they'd probably assumed her in her room and unwilling to speak to anyone.

Raven tried again to use her powers and got nothing. How was she going to get to her room all the way up there without flying or teleporting?

She growled to herself, "Fuck me…" and then a bitter smile found its way onto her face, "Oh wait, he just did."

Author's Note:

Reviews and feedback of any kind are appriciated :) feel free to PM with suggestions ect.

Have a Lovely Day!

-Kay