A/N: I've finally gotten around to doing what I've been meaning to do for forever: a multi-chapter Richter/Emil story! I wanted to begin with the relationship I left off with in Gentle Winds and Warm Hands and explore what would happen to the two of them when Emil's connection with Aster's killer, Ratatosk, became more apparent. I also wanted to bring Ratatosk and Marta into the equation because I've never actually written a story yet about their relationship or how Emil's identity crisis affects them. I can't wait to work on this project, and I hope you all enjoy it!

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the Tales of world, just the creative spices.

"Whatever you meant to love, in meaning to You changed yourself: you are not who you are, your soul cut moment to moment by a blade of fresh desire, the ground sown with abandoned skins. And at your inmost circle, what? A core that is not one. Poor fool, you are divided at the heart, lost in its maze of chambers, blood, and love, a heart that will one day beat you to death." Suji Kowck Kim, Monologue for an Onion.

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Zelos had been right; the Cape Fortress was little better than a glorified dump. The stairways crumbled, the walls were covered in moss, and cobwebs clung to every exposed surface like thin and delicate veils. With every movement Emil made, he felt them brush against his skin and cling to his clothes as if to swath them in lace. He knew he didn't have the leisure of stopping and brushing them off because he had been told by Richter to either keep up or be left behind, but the sensation of their touch against him, like ghostly fingers against his back and neck, gave him the creeps, and he couldn't help audibly shivering whenever he came into contact with one as they made their way through the dilapidated fortress.

"What is it this time?" Richter sighed, his voice annoyed and long suffering. He halted their march and turned to Emil with cool and penetrating eyes.

Emil grimaced, his cheeks burning. He hadn't meant to disturb the temperamental half-elf with his nervous whimpering, especially since Richter was clearly more upset with him than he usually was. Other than a few terse commands at the start of their mission, he'd barely spoken two words to Emil, as well as going out of his way to avoid eye contact, or any kind of physical contact at all, for that matter. Emil could't help but wonder if this had anything to do with his Ratatosk-mode episode at the Temple of Darkness, which, according to Marta and Sheena, was the first time either of them had heard him confront Richter with unhesitating brutality. He couldn't remember anything about that day, but from the way Richter was treating him now, he could only guess that he said and did some pretty awful things.

"Well?" Richter asked again, the corners of his mouth going lower. "If nothing is wrong, cut it out with those noises you're making. You're getting on my nerves."

"I'm sorry," Emil said contritely.

"And the last thing I need to hear right now is another one of your apologies."

"O-okay."

Richter extended his hand and brushed it for a moment against Emil's blonde hair. Almost immediately, he jerked it back, a look of disgust passing over his face as if the mere touch of Emil was enough to revile him. The younger boy blushed in shame, wondering yet again what he had done to earn this displeasure. He wished he could take it back- whatever it was- so things could go back to the way they were before. Richter had never been an outright friendly companion, but at least there had been some semblance of friendship between them before it had somehow gone downhill on their quest for the cores.

"There were webs in your hair," Richter explained, his voice accusatory as if Emil had been going out of his way to run into them. "If you're not going to be careful, you may as well turn around and go back to Marta right now. I don't need your help."

Emil went silent, feeling as if Richter had slapped him. His assistance during these jaunts had never been solicited, but it had always, at the very least, been appreciated. Richter knew Emil risked a lot by lying to Marta and the others to be with him, and he'd always been able to respect the fact that the boy wasn't just tagging along for fun. But now, it seemed, none of that mattered to him. It didn't matter that Emil was putting things on the line all for his sake; whatever had happened between them at the Temple of Darkness seemed to sap Richter's will to be civil to the enemy who had once been his friend.

Suddenly, it hit Emil. The reason Richter was treating him this way. Maybe it wasn't because he had lost control of his dark side and lashed out, but because there was someone else inside him he may have forgotten. Aster. Richter had called him by the name himself, a look of pure agony on his face. Emil couldn't be sure, but there was a possibility he was the missing researcher from Sybak. Maybe Richter had figured it out, and was angry with him for forgetting everything, forgetting that they ever knew each other once upon a time.

"You don't want me around because...?" Emil whispered, more to himself than to Richter. He wasn't sure he wanted to know the answer. Even if he had been Aster once, he wasn't now. There was no denying that. Aster had been a genius, and Emil barely knew anything about the world he lived in. Besides, there was the question of his memories of his parents and Palmacosta. He didn't understand how he could have imagined those in such vivid detail if he was supposed to have been in the Research Academy from a young age.

"Because of what?" Richter asked, looking at Emil expectantly. "Because of who you are? What, did Tenebrae finally tell you?"

"The people at the Academy told me about how I look like Aster. And the others said that there is a possibility... t-that I might be him."

Richter's face erupted in sudden pain and fury, shattering the cool and apathetic mask he typically wore. Without warning, his hands were against Emil's shoulders, pushing him against the cold and dirty fortress walls and pinning him there.

"You are not Aster," he said coldly as Emil frantically registered the shock of his actions and the proximity of his body and face. "Aster is dead. And do you know who killed him?"

Everyone in Sybak pointed their fingers at Richter for Aster's murder, but Emil hadn't believed them. If Richter had needlessly spared Emil's life so many times, what would drive him to the kill the boy who had been his best friend? The man he knew wasn't capable of doing such a thing. Richter wasn't the type like Alice who killed for the sake of killing; he only did what he felt was necessary to achieve whatever ends he had in mind. If could spare a life, he did. Emil and his friends were a testament to that.

"I... don't know," Emil finally murmured, trembling beneath Richter's tight grip. "I don't know."

Richter exhaled sharply. He looked so angry that Emil couldn't bear to meet his eyes for any longer. Nervously, he fixed his gaze on the bloodstained floor, wishing he had never been brave enough to broach the subject of Aster when Richter was in such an obvious bad mood.

A rough hand pushed his chin upwards, forcing his eyes to once again meet the unrelenting stare he'd been avoiding. "That's right," Richter stated coolly, his fingers digging into Emil's jawline. "You don't know. You don't have a clue who you are."

"D-do you?" Emil whispered. "If you know I'm not Aster, do you know who I really am?"

Richter bared his teeth menacingly, looking as if he was about to release the full extent of his fury right then and there. Emil flinched, turning his face away so he wouldn't have to witness it. He knew there was a part of Richter that cared about him, but at the same time he was aware of the fact that he had exhausted that side of Richter to its limit. If the time was coming for them to become the enemies they were destined from the start to become, he didn't want to give his consent. Richter could do as he liked, but Emil had already vowed not to give up on him, no matter how their relationship changed. Even if he was about to get hurt, he would accept this fate without dealing out hurt in return.

After a moment, Richter's hand once again guided Emil's face so their eyes met. The anger in his expression had faded somewhat, replaced by sadness. It wasn't sadness like anyone else's sadness- there were no tears to be seen in his green eyes, and his brow was unwrinkled and smooth- but Emil could see shades of it here and there as Richter silently fought for the composure that usually came so naturally to him.

"I thought I knew who you were," he said darkly, his eyes boring deep into Emil's skin. "But I don't even know if there is even one single answer to that question. You may be the only who can answer it decisively. But all the same..." Richter's expression hardened again. "I know part of what exists within you. I know what that part of you did. I don't know how much the Emil I see before me is responsible, but when it comes down to it, it doesn't really matter. As long as that... that thing is inside you, you are my enemy. That can never change."

Emil paled. Richter was just reiterating what Regal and Raine had already deduced about his identity as Emil Castagnier being an invention to disguise a dormant personality, but it sound worse coming from him. The others had been hopeful that Emil had become just as real as whomever he truly was, but Richter didn't seem to care at all about that. He had already honed in on the other Emil, the red-eyed, unrestrained defender of Marta, and decided never to forgive him for whatever he had done.

No. It couldn't be ending this way. It couldn't. Emil didn't understand who he was or how he had come to posses the memories of Emil Castagnier of Palmacosta or even what he was doing inside a body that seemed to belong to Aster, but he knew that the person he was now would never do anything to harm Richter. It didn't make sense that he was being punished for something he didn't have it in him to do, or that he was on the verge of losing the person he treasured most just because his existence had become muddled and confused by someone outside of his control.

"This isn't fair," Emil said quietly, for once looking into Richter's eyes of his volition. He felt as if he could cry, but at the same time, he realized he was much too exhausted. Everything was taking a toll on him; his increasingly lengthy time spent in Ratatosk mode, the fear of what he had done to Richter in the Temple of Darkness, the star shaped scar that he and Aster shared. And now this. What would it take to get his life back the way he wanted it?

"This just isn't fair," he said again.

Richter stared back at him, his eyes burning with a look somewhere between pity, disgust, and understanding. "Yeah, I suppose it is isn't fair" he admitted, his breath hot and intimate against Emil's upturned face. When Emil flushed and released a barely audibly gasp of surprise, he released his hold on him and took two steps backwards as if to put a safe amount of distance between them. "It isn't fair," he repeated, turning his face away, "but than again, neither are you."