Leading Down to This

Aizen~Hisana

Romance/Friendship/Tragedy

Rating: T

Summary: Everyone always wondered what Sosuke Aizen would have been like had he something to live for other than the crazed ambition that had driven him to his final sentence. This is the love he sowed with Hisana leading down to his imprisonment.

A/N: There is no direct timeline to this. In this fic, Hisana's destiny is interwoven with that of Aizen's, influencing his decisions in the near future.

The first time he saw Kuchiki Hisana, her eyes beheld the world's cruelty, holding it still in time and space in pools of liquid indigo. Yet, at the same moment, even despite the fact that she had seen so much unkindness and malice in this dismal universe, she retained the strength necessary to hold in herself such qualities of love.

Aizen saw himself in her, a wondrous flower standing on the precipice of a cliff, staring out into the world and grasping for the heavens only because it could, and no one else would do so because they weren't fearless like that flower. If Hisana was a blossom of any kind, she would be a tepid-looking, rose-colored lily, collecting dew as one would everyday know-hows. She had the mental state lacking in outspoken nature or a single-minded character driven by ambition; she didn't care to be heard, but she was bountiful in savoir faire. Hisana held her opinions personally, acknowledging everything that occurred around her and yet never giving a close-up opinion of it.

It was as if everything streamed through her in a myriad of the holy and profane without quite being registered, just passing on to the next waiting individual.

Nevertheless, she was very intelligent, forgiving, and affection. Hisana was consistent and reliable when it came to conserving and speaking up for those that she cherished, and she would never back down when it came to right and wrong, and what Tousen most specifically called "justice." He saw her in early spring for the foremost time soon after he'd been promoted by the head captain general, Yamamoto, to become leader and commander of squad 5. Hisana didn't question his purpose or reason; docile and non-hypercritical as she was, she just gazed at him with the eyes of a divine being and an understanding that only he could comprehend.

She empathized with his yearning for solace and succor, his calling for knowledge and a perceptive individual whom, even though he had in Ichimaru Gin, couldn't seem to satisfy him in this never-ending quest he was driven to undergo. Aizen knew that he had brought this on himself, but every time he felt the familiar anguish, he turned on the upturned, beaten path of cries and pleas that had went unheard his whole childhood. He was tired and he was missing what he'd left behind, but something was calling to him: a voice that implored to be heard. What he was planning on doing wasn't worth it, he convinced himself-no, he told himself; she was persuading him.

This beautiful creature, Kuchiki Hisana, induced him with her wisdom; her eyes foretold a future with him coming to a crossroads in either direction.

He wasn't in it for a victory, but a loss that would surely take him nowhere no matter what verdict he settled on to attain the Hogyoku. Sosuke Aizen was standing somewhere in his field of logic, alone, and with a loneliness and isolation he'd encouraged himself to believe was actually power in itself. Aizen trusted himself and only himself, and it was due to this that concealed him for what he really was: a monster in disguise. Yet still, he found Hisana endearing in so many ways.

He waited for someone, someone to match his logic and prowess, his god-given skills, if they were really even given by God. Hisana was the physical equivalent of his judgment and proficiency; she thrived for knowledge but she lacked the overall drive and motive to cruelly trample on people just to get what she wanted. All the same, he fell in love with her, though the relationship remained completely platonic because Byakuya insisted on keeping her within eyesight. Aizen reckoned that Hisana was probably the only being he'd ever told of his destitutions, aside from a mangy black lab in Rukongai that had captured his attention as a youth. He was astonished at how well she listened to him; he presupposed that she knew of his future objectives, and though it occurred to him that he should kill her, they both knew that he wouldn't.

During the day, when he shouldered his duties as a captain and plotted to take the Hogyoku, he was, underneath, a sadistic instigator who would stop at nothing to achieve his goal: aggregate domination of the world. By evening, Sosuke Aizen was just a humble man who practiced his calligraphy in the solitude of his domain, lounging in snug kimonos or casually taking a stroll down to the Kuchiki manor so he could converse to a certain raven-haired female.

"I'm glad to have you as my friend, Sosuke," Hisana whispered, leaning against his shoulder and grasping his hand with slim fingers. They both sat there under the eve just outside her room, basking in the residual sunlight that stretched over the horizon. Aizen didn't say anything-he didn't have to; Hisana understood his discretion in things and knew intuitively that they were companions just by mutual sentiments alone.

A few weeks later, Hisana fell ill; everyone said that it was terminal and that there was nothing that could be done. Aizen cursed the negligence of the 4th division. By day, he was a contrite captain who merely gave his regards to the grief stricken Byakuya he passed down the hall after a meeting in the 1st division barracks. By evening, Aizen managed to elude his subordinates long enough to pay one final visit to Hisana. Her gorgeous eyes, once full of so much more, were now insipid, her skin a sallow color, her wilted hair splayed around her face. She managed a heartrending smile and murmured his name when he walked into her abode, voice cracking.

"Sosuke..." He reached out and took her tiny hand in his own, but said nothing. She was dying, there was nothing else they could say that could make the situation any better or worse. He wasn't going to go into denial, he wasn't going to burst into tears, and neither of them were going to pretend anymore.

"Kiss me," she whispered, undertone so faint he barely heard her. "One for the road."

He obliged, inclining his head and pressing full lips to hers. Hisana leisurely laced her fingers through his hair, a single tear escaping her eye as she exposed her feelings of affection for the older male. Aizen simply brushed the tear away, feeling awkward for once in his life. This state of awkwardness was a first for him, and so was the kiss; it was also his last. Hisana touched his face once last time, as if struggling to memorize ever facet of his being for her final minute was up. Aizen closed his eyes, touching her hand and pressing it to his cheek, wanting what he couldn't have, what was beyond his grasp.

"Never forget me," she pleaded gently. Aizen embraced her, cradling her against his chest for the longest time possible. Exhausted, Hisana fell to sleep there in his arms.

Aizen left and was delivered the news by way of gossip the following morning that she had passed away. He never forgot Hisana, and he never admitted that somewhere, deep in his soul, he would have given up his plans in a heartbeat for her if she'd asked. In light of Hisana's death, Aizen continued his plot to capture the Hogyoku, and ended up running across a certain Rukia Kuchiki. Rukia was everything Hisana wasn't, and even less, yet he allowed himself to be fascinated with her if only but for a short moment. He wasn't sure if he was condemning Rukia to an eternity of misery just because she bore resemblance to Hisana or not when he murdered Kaien Shiba. Aizen told himself he hadn't directly killed Kaien, but it was just the same because he'd created the Hollow that had murdered the man. Had Urahara suspected of Aizen's relationship with Hisana when he had planted the Hogyoku inside Rukia's konpaku? He didn't deduce that it was fact, but it was better yet just a coincidence.

Aizen fulfilled his scheme with each step that he made, never once faltering, his expression of cold calculation never wavering despite the people he killed.

Hisana would have been ashamed had she seen him, he knew. Aizen just couldn't bring himself to stop; he'd already overstepped his boundaries when he became Shinji's lieutenant. There was no turning back now. And in the end, when Aizen faced Ichigo Kurosaki, he knew he'd found the equal he'd been longing for since the very beginning.

He plastered on his best smug impression even though he knew he was going to lose. He watched as Ichigo Kurosaki defied all odds at the cost of all the power he'd gained. Sosuke Aizen continued the act until he was alone, imprisoned by the Central 46. It was over. Only silence beleaguered him now.

It would be thousands of years yet before he died, an agonizingly measured death. I'll come back to you soon...Hisana, he thought, and waited for death to come.

A/N: Amazingly bittersweet. Some fluff. I have to admit, I'm proud of this one. I feel accomplished.