The burn of the Scotch as it caressed his tongue and throat was welcomed, reminded him that he could feel something. He can't remember ever being this mad at her, ever feeling this helpless. She said it was over, part of him hopes that she was being serious, the part of him that gets so wound up by her stubborn nature.
As he replays her words in his head, her defiant refusal to admit that for once he was right, he'd called her out, the anger he felt on leaving her apartment returns in full force. His Heat Wave promotional poster has the bad luck of catching his attention and falls, or is knocked rather, from its proud perch under his violent release of throwing the emptied glass.
"Oh my God, what the hell's going on here!" Martha appears in his office clutching her gwon to herself, eyes wide with shock.
He has the dignity to look shamed and immediately his anger softens "It's nothing I am sorry go back to bed."
His mother's knowing look is less than he can take right now but he stays silent. "There's only one person on the planet who can get you this pissed off."
Facing his mother he unknowingly reveals his fears " She's going to get herself killed."
"She's a grown woman, she's a homicide detective for gods sakes. It's her job, it's her life." Martha tries to reason with him, to show him that she won't back down for him.
"If anything happens to her.." His eyes are vulnerable and suddenly he feels incapable of finishing hat sentence.
"Go on.." When he can't bring himself to finish the sentence Martha leans forward with a sigh "Oh Richard, Richard. For a man who makes a living with his words, you sure have a hell of a time finding them when it counts… Darling I'll give you a word of advice advice alright, from someone who is already more than halfway through the movie, don't waste another minute of it."
Her impassioned plea makes him look up and meet her eyes, the warm encouraging smile makes him think carefully about what he should do, what he should have done. Kate had challenged him earlier, challenged him to name what they were, and he had chickened out. His mother is right, he hadn't found his words when it mattered.
Beckett makes her way to the front door, alert despite her being asleep only moments before, her side arm loaded and ready if needed. The pounding on her door has been relentless and urgent, approaching silently she raises one eye to the peep hole cautiously, her gun raised. Seeing who her late night visitor is she drops her weapon to her side with an exasperated sigh and thrusts the door open.
Castle has his fist raised, ready for another round of pounding but he pauses as he takes in her furious expression. So focused on her face, he doesn't notice her state of half-undress, but then neither does she.
"Castle, what the hell? I could have shot you. Go home Castle, I told you, it's over!" His expression is dark as he moves towards her, over the threshold and into her apartment. "We are over Castle."
"The hell we are.." His hands grasp her waist pulling her against him as his mouth seeks hers, their kiss bruising, verging on violent and it takes her a whole two seconds to realise what is occurring. She pushes against his chest to free herself from his insistent kiss, and as soon as there is a breath of a distance between them she swings back and slaps him with as much force as she can muster.
He stumbles away from her, a hand involuntarily coming to his cheek, but when he meets her eyes again she gives nothing away. Facing him, breathing harshly her eyes search his for seconds before she grasps fistfuls of his shirt bringing his body back in contact with hers and presses her lips to his hungrily.
Castle doesn't miss a beat, wrapping his arms around her he matches her hunger with passion of his own, kicking the door shut behind them he sweeps her up into his arms, his lips never leaving hers, and stalks towards the bedroom.
Lowering her to her feet beside the bed, her hands immediately make short work of his jacket, it pools on the floor at their feet as he kicks off his shoes, she is already undoing the buttons on his jeans when the reality catches up with him, they are actually going to do this. His hands on hers still her movements and he captures her gaze, as the seconds pass the anger in them starts to fade, replaced with a softness. He moves towards her, backing her against the bed until she has no option but to lie down, settling on top of her he stares into those eyes again, brushing her hair back from her face before touching his lips to hers, the heat is gone, immediately dissipated, replaced by tenderness.
An hour later, he lay staring at the ceiling. He'd dreamt of this over and over again, and now that it had finally happened, they had finally given into their emotions he couldn't feel anything other than uncertainty. Glancing at Beckett's sleeping form for a moment he pushes his feet over the edge of the bed and gets up, without a backward glance, or his clothes, he walks into the living area and over to her bookshelves. Unsure of how long he stands there staring at the titles, he is suddenly aware of her presence at the doorway of her bedroom. She's leaning against the jamb, a sheet wrapped around her waist watching him with a blank expression.
"Hey."
He responds the same, running a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry if I woke you." She shakes her head slowly. "Couldn't sleep."
"You don't need to explain Castle."
He nods at that and looks to the books in front of him again. "I should go Kate." He turns his face to meet her eyes. She doesn't flinch, gives nothing away.
"Yes."
Nodding to himself, he dodges her form still clinging to the jamb and begins to collect his belongings from the floor of her room. He's almost fully dressed before she moves from the door and as he ties his shoes he looks up to see her drawing the sheet more tightly around herself. Finishing the laces he stands form the edge of the bed and scoops up his jacket from the floor. She won't meet his eyes, the anger from earlier has returned, the air thick with everything that is unsaid. He walks towards her and placing a hand on her shoulder he presses a brief kiss to her forehead. "Goodnight Kate."
Walking past her, she doesn't see the pain and confusion on his face. She simply stares at the floor in the room until she hears the front door click shut behind him, the deadbolt sliding into place, only then does she let out the breath she had been holding and unclench the fists she didn't realise he had been clenching. Nothing had been fixed tonight, and they both knew it. It was over.