Shots
by: Morbid-Malfunctions

A/N: Oh my goodness! I apologize for the people following my story I Am Cut. School is starting in a few days and I have been stressing over my senior pictures. I promise I will update the newest chapter soon, but this story has been stuck in my head and it just had to be written. I was listening to Shots by LMFAO featuring Lil Jon and this story popped into my head and was begging to be written. I have a few OC's in this story but they fit, don't hate. This is a one-shot full of drunk snarry smutty-ness. Beta'd by the lovely All Tears Must Fall(: Enjoy!

xxx

Severus Snape was never the type of man that drank. He also was never the type of man to consciously think his fellow staff members were unbearably sexy. Okay, maybe only a certain fellow staff member. A certain DADA professor who went by the name of Harry Fucking Potter.

Okay, maybe Fucking isn't his given middle name, but Severus liked to think so. He also never thought he was the type of man to sleep with said unbearably sexy DADA professor who was currently snuggled up into his side sleeping while Severus pondered how in the world he ended up there.

We shall return to the topic of: Severus Snape was never the type of man that drank. That was, at least, until last night.

xxx

It all started at, what seemed to be, the perfectly normal staff meeting. It was the 5th anniversary of the fall of Voldemort. The past 5 years, no one at Hogwarts celebrated. They used the day to mourn their lost loved ones or spent the day with fellow survivors and think back on the hard-ships of the war. But not today, Harry decided. He decided that they should celebrate. And he told his fellow staff so.

"Excuse me, Minerva," He said quietly, catching everyone's attention since everyone was chattering softly amongst themselves. "I think 5 years of mourning is long enough. The war is over, Voldemort is dead. I think it's time to celebrate. We will always remember the lives of the lost... but I think it's time we rejoice for the lives of the living." He shifted his eyes to see everyone's reactions. Minerva's eyes were twinkling in a way he hadn't seen since he looked into the eyes of Dumbledore. A pang of sadness hit his heart, but also a spark of happiness. Minerva could still find happiness in life. That's what everyone had been missing.

"I agree," Minerva announced loudly. Everyone but Harry turned and gave her a baffled look. Harry just had a smug grin on his face.

Severus was the first to speak. "Minerva, you cannot be serious." He was pinching the bridge of his nose, trying to prevent an oncoming headache, which probably wasn't working.

"Oh, I'm quite serious, Severus. Harry had a valid point. We've spent too many years mourning and haven't spent any time celebrating the lives of those who survived." Minerva turned to Harry and rested her chin on her hands, peering at him over her glasses. "So tell me, Harry, what did you have in mind?"

"Uhm," Harry blushed, obviously not expecting to have to think of something. "I usually go to a muggle club with a couple of my friends. They don't know what happened but they do know that I like to celebrate something."

"What kind of a club?" All of the faculty members were curious now, but no one was saying anything.

"A dance club. There's a bar on one side and a dancing area on the other. We just dance the night away and get hammered. It's fun."

"That sounds interesting." She sat back in her chair, pondering Harry's suggestion.

Severus snorted. "Interesting? Sounds like a place for young adults to get smashed, fornicate, and acquire an STD. Not all of us find that to be a good time, and not all of us are as young as we once were."

Now some of the staff decided to voice their opinions.

"I think it sounds like a positively good time." Flitwick spoke up, grinning and nodding his head. A few of the other professors were nodding with him.

"I think it would be fun to see how the young muggles spend their evenings." Sprout interjected, smiling.

"So it's decided then. A muggle dance club it is. Harry, would you care to make portkeys for us since none of us knows where this place is?"

"Of course."

Severus rolled his eyes, grumbling. "If I remember correctly, not all of us agreed to this."

"Oh, Severus. Your vote never counts."

With a dark glare toward Minerva, Severus left the staff room with his dark robes billowing out behind him.
Minerva chuckled, watching him leave with a twinkle in her eye.

"He sure knows how to make a grand departure."

xxx

The muggle club was in full swing when the staff arrived. Muggle rap music was blaring, strobe lights flashing, and people were taking shots in under three seconds flat. Harry decided he would help loosen everyone up by ordering them all a shot. The only person that didn't down theirs was Severus. He stared at his shot-glass in disdain.

"The alcohol can't glare back, Severus." Harry teased, picking up the cosmo the bartender sat in front of him. He took a sip of the fruity drink as he swivelled in his chair and stood up to go dance. "Drink up." He winked at him before he left.

Harry danced around the club, trying to find people he could get to take shots with him. As he was doing so, he found his muggle friends who he knew were waiting for him.

"Bryn, Haven, Gale!" Harry shouted over the blaring music. The three turned, all with grins plastered on their faces. He wove his way through the crowd to greet them all.

Bryn was a cute petite girl with caramel brown hair, green eyes, and a tan that made her look Mexican. She was only 5'1" so the pumps she always wore to the clubs at least made her eye level to Harry.

Haven had natural deep brown hair that looked black and stunning baby blue eyes. Her style was scene, but she couldn't refuse a party.

Gale had sandy blonde hair and brown eyes that looked copper. He wasn't quite sure how one got that eye color as a muggle, so maybe he had a little magical creature in him, but Harry was too scared to ask in case there wasn't.

They were an odd group, but he loved them. The three swamped him the minute he got to him.

"Harry!" Bryn shouted into his ear. "We've missed you!"

"I've missed you too!" Harry grinned, pulling away from them. "Let's go to a booth so we can hear!"

They all nodded and found a place to sit. "So how have you guys been?"

"Never better, we've all been looking forward to this for a while. Especially me. Party hardy." Haven beamed, holding up an apple martini.

Harry chuckled and shook his head.

"So how have you been, Professor? Like the new job?" Gale questioned with a smile on his face, elbowing him in the side.

Harry shrugged. "It's been alright. I want to ring all of their necks. I want to find all of my professors and apologize for how obnoxious I was."

"Hooked up with your man, yet? The dark mysterious one?" Bryn questioned, wiggling her eyebrows and taking a sip of her drink.

Harry gave a frustrated sigh. "No, and I doubt we ever will. There's so much history between us that's bound to keep us apart, so why even try?"

"Because love conquers all. If he has the same feelings for you that you have for him then nothing should keep you apart." Bryn announced, her face serious.

"Unless he's straight. He was in love with my mother." Harry pouted into his drink.

"Could be bi, I mean, if you look like her..." Gale wiggled his eyebrows this time, laughing as he did so.

Harry smirked into his drink. "I look like my dad. Except for my eyes. I have her eyes."

"We need to find out!" Bryn shouted. "We need to go to your school and find him and question him until he cracks."

Harry rolled his eyes. "He's already here. The entire staff is here."

"Ooooh." Haven smirked, downing her glass. "Where is he?"

"He's at the bar. All black. Brooding. Somber expression."

All three of his friends craned their necks to get a better look.

"Mmm." Haven hummed, sitting back down in her seat. "He's pretty good looking."

"Back off Haven," Gale chuckled, sitting back down also. "He's Harry's."

Bryn giggled, flopping down in her seat.

"I've got an idea," Gale grinned, looking around to see all of their expressions. "We need to find out if he's interested or not."

"And how are you going to do that?" Harry questioned.

"We're going to try to make him jealous." Gale smirked, waving a waitress over.

"We need an apple martini, a coconut pomegranate martini, a sex on the beach, a mudslide, and eight shots of mango smirnoff. Tell Rango it's for Harry."

The waitress left with a confused look on her face.

"Why not have a good time while we do this?"

Harry rolled his eyes and the waitress returned with the requested drinks.

"Rango said it's on the house." She sat the tray on the table and left. Each of them picked up a shot and downed it, grimacing at the strong bite of the vodka. Haven picked up the apple martini and sipped it. Bryn grabbed her Sex on the Beach and took a long swallow. Harry and Gale put their drinks in front of them, but didn't take a drink.

"Let's do another shot," Haven and Bryn rolled their eyes but took the shot any way.

"Now," Gale started, taking a drink of his mudslide. "Bryn and Haven need to sit at the bar and watch your man to see signs of the green monster. We'll be on the floor dancing. Together. Dirty." Gale grinned, looking Harry up and down.

"If he gets jealous, then we'll need to get him drunk. Then the mighty panther can pounce."
Harry rolled his eyes, taking a drink. "Sounds good to me."

"Us too!" The girls chorused together. Haven glanced back over to Severus.

"I won't mind watching him."

Harry rolled his eyes again, swallowing half his drink. Gale watched as his adam's apple bobbed. Bryn smacked Gale's arm, giggling. "Gale, quit that. He's not interested."

"Doesn't mean I'm not interested. You know I'm not going to be able to keep my hands off you when we're dancing, right Harry?"

"Of course, I always knew you had a thing for me." Harry smirked, eyebrow cocked as he sipped his drink. "Plus it will make Severus more jealous."

"That's all that matters."

They all finished their drinks and Bryn and Haven went and sat on opposite sides of Severus as Harry and Gale made their way to the dance floor. Get Low by Lil John was playing and Gale was leading him by his waist and Harry resisted rolling his eyes. Might as well milk this. He hadn't had any action for a while.

When they got to a place where they knew Severus would see them, Harry turned in Gale's arms and hooked his leg around the blonde's waist, grinding their hips together. He wrapped his arms around the taller man's neck as he brought himself close, kissing Gale's neck. Harry smirked against the skin under his lips and they grinded to the beat.

Harry turned around so his ass was pressing against Gale's crotch. He could feel the bulge, but he didn't care. He bent over, pressing against him harder as the song progressed.

"Let me see you get low, you scared, you scared, drop that ass to the floor, you scared, you scared. Let me see you get low, you scared, you scared, drop that ass to the floor, you scared, you scared."

Harry complied, dropping it to the floor and coming back up to grind against Gale.

"Bend over to the front, touch your toes, back that ass up and get low, get low. Bend over to the front, touch your toes, back that ass up and get low, get low."

Harry could feel the dark eyes watching him as he danced with Gale. Smirking, he turned around and pressed his lips against Gale's, running his tongue along the seam of his mouth to ask for entrance. Gale willingly opened his mouth and their tongues ran against each other, fighting for dominance.

Harry felt hands on his ass and he turned around to see a smashed Bryn grinning at him. Harry placed his hands on her hips and pulled her close, kissing her. He could feel Gale's hands snake around his chest and under his shirt, running his fingers along his abs.

Bryn turned around and was grinding her ass to Harry's front and Harry did the same to Gale. Their grinding train continued until the next song ended and Gale stepped away. "I'm going to get another drink." He told Harry and he and Bryn continued to dance.

Drop It Low by Lil Wayne started playing and Bryn hiked up her party dress and started to dance like a black girl. She was very inter-racial. Harry raked his eyes over her body. He would go straight for this girl.

She had her ass in the air and her hands on the floor and she was dancing like Deena from Jersey Shore. The two continued to grind until Haven stopped them.

"He's seen enough, let's go back to the booth." Haven gave him a kiss and they all went back to where Gale was.

"Was he jealous?" Harry questioned, breathing hard and his face flushed.

"Ohhhh yeahh. I could practically see the daggers he was shooting at Gale with his eyes. Bryn didn't make it much better. He looked like he wanted to murder somebody."

Gale had a triumphant grin on his face. "I knew it would work."

Harry rolled his eyes, chucking.

"Now we have to get him drunk."

"How are we going to do that? The man barely drinks."

"Shots of course."

"He won't drink them. He didn't drink the group one that the rest of the staff took."

"He will when he gets put in the shot-line." Gale smirked and it was Haven's turn to roll her eyes.

"Let's go round up some people to get this started."

Harry looked at them with a confused look. "What are you guys talking about?"

"The song Shots. The shot-line. He will have to drink them, then. We're going to find the other 11 people that we need to complete the line. You go request the song." Harry nodded and they all left to go fulfil their tasks.

xxx

It was at least an hour before Harry talked to Severus again. He was still sitting at the same place at the bar, but the shot glass in front of him was empty. It was probably the only drink the man had that night. Harry, however, was completely smashed.

He had requested Shots to be played and he returned to the bar to order more shots for the song. "I need four rows of 16 shots of Patrón please." He told Rango in a surprisingly clear voice. As the bartender was finishing up pouring shots, the song started. Grinning, Harry went over to where Severus was sitting.

"Come on, you have to do this!" He practically yanked the man right off his bar stool and dragged him over to where the shots, Bryn,Gale, Haven, and the other 11 people were waiting. Harry and Severus both had 4 shots sitting in front of them as they waited for the repeated "shots" to start.

"Okay, so I'll go first on the first "shot" and you go second. Got it?" Harry turned to Severus, holding up his first shot.

"I think not, Mister Potter."

"Oh, shut up Severus, and take the shot after me. You're in the shot-line you have to do this. If you don't it's a major party foul and you'll be totally hated." Harry picked up the man's shot and pushed it into his hand. "You better drink it." Right on cue, the first shot started and fifteen more followed, everyone, including Severus, taking their shot on their turn.

"We have to do this three more times?" Severus questioned, the burn of the tequila settling in his stomach. Harry didn't get the chance to answer when the second round of "shots" started and he had to down his glass.

"Shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, everybody!"

"No, only two more times." Harry grinned and started to dance in front of the bar.

"The ladies love us when we pour shots, they need an excuse to suck our cocks. We came to get cruck, how bout you? Bottoms up, let's go round two! Shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, everybody! Shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, everybody!"

Harry and Severus downed their shot-glasses on their turn and Severus was feeling the familiar buzz of alcohol.

"Can I get two cosmos please?"

"I don't think I need any more alcohol, Potter." Severus growled, trying to get off his stool and leave, but Haven had him trapped.

"Of course you do. You're at a club. Drink." She held up her fourth apple martini and took a swig.

Severus rolled his eyes but took a sip of his drink.

"Harry let's go dance again." Bryn tugged on his hand. Harry gave her a "back off" look and Gale stepped in.

"I'll take you to the dance floor." Bryn shrugged and went off with Gale and Harry gave his friend an appreciated smile.

Harry finished his cosmo and looked at Severus, who had at least finished half of his. The man should be getting loopy by now.

"Let's go dance."

"Excuse me?" Severus gave him an incredulous look.

"I said, let's go dance."

"I do not dance, Potter."

"You do now."

Harry took the man's hand and dragged him to the dance floor.

Porn Star Dancing by My Darkest Days was playing and Harry smirked. This was the perfect song to seduce the Potion's Master.

Harry slunk up to his fellow professor, a lustful look in his eyes. He turned just before his lips reached Severus' and he started grinding against the immobile man, moving his hips to the hot beat.

He ran his fingers through his hair and looked at Severus through his lashes over his shoulder and the dark eyed man had a hungry look in his eyes.

Harry turned around and Severus put his hands on his waist.

"Like what you see?" Harry questioned.

"I have for a while now."

Harry stood on his tip-toes and pressed his lips against Severus', moaning at the contact. He never knew a kiss could be so hot.

Harry broke away, his face flushed. "What do you say we get out of here?" He questioned, smirking at the taller man's kiss-swollen lips.

"I say that I agree."

Harry waved goodbye to his friends who were watching them from the booth as Severus lead him to the alley way outside and they disapparated.

xxx

Severus apparated Harry and himself in front of his personal quarters in the dungeons of Hogwarts and Harry gave him a quizzical look.

"I thought you couldn' apparate into Hogwarts." He slurred, causing Severus to smirk.

"The wards recognize members of the staff and allow us to apparate." Even when he was completely smashed he was articulate. Figures.

"Can I apparate?"

"No."

Harry pouted. "But I'm a member of the staff now."

"We haven't had the chance to update the wards to your magical signature. Hence, you cannot apparate."

By this time in the conversation, Severus had muttered the password to the portrait guarding his quarters and had led them to the bedroom, where he currently had Harry pinned to the bed.

Harry couldn't reply because he lost the ability to form words. Severus was kissing his neck and running his fingers up under his shirt to trace the contours of his six-pack. He moaned, grinding his hips up against Severus' like he was a cat in heat, trying to find some friction.

Severus pushed Harry's shirt up and pulled it off, throwing it to some unknown corner of the room. Smirking, he noticed that the man below him had his nipple pierced. He leaned down and started placing kisses against Harry's collar bone, moving lower to kiss his chest, all the while rubbing his hands up and down Harry's sides.

Harry gave a throaty groan when Severus took one of his nipples in his mouth, licking, sucking, and biting it softly until it was a hard, rosy bud. He then gave the other nipple that adorned the nipple-ring attention, sliding his hand down in between them to rub Harry through his pants.

Breathing hard, Harry sat up to watch Severus play with his nipple. He was twirling the ring in his mouth, flicking his tongue against his nipple, and tugging on the ring gently. When Severus looked up at him with lustful eyes through his lashes, he almost came in his pants.

Deciding he would take some control, Harry lifted Severus' face up by his chin and kissed him hard on the mouth, using his weight and arm strength he gained training from the final battle to flip them over so Harry was on top.

Severus was taken aback, shocked by Harry's sudden desire to become the dominant one. This time it was Harry's turn to smirk, pressing his groin against Severus', causing the older man's eyes to flutter shut while he moaned at the contact.

"You're wearing too many clothes."

Harry started pulling Severus' shirt off and Severus helped by leaning up so it was easier to take off. Harry slid his hands down Severus' sides until he decided to unbutton the man's pants.

"You first." Harry mumbled, kissing down Severus' chest and stomach, pausing to dip his tongue into his naval, causing the older man to give a hearty moan.

Harry nudged him to lift up his hips so he could take his pants and boxers off. Severus complied and Harry was majorly turned on by just the size of Severus' weeping member.

Harry nuzzled the curls around the man's cock, breathing in the musky smell that was just plain Severus. Harry leaned up a bit and kissed the tip of his cock, then left butterfly kisses as he went down the shaft until he got to where it connected to his lower abdomen.

Harry licked the man from base to tip and then he swirled his tongue around the head, enjoying the sounds he was pulling from Severus' throat. He blew gently on his cock, causing the man to shiver. Smirking, Harry took Severus in his mouth completely until the head touched the back of his throat. Harry hummed around the shaft, causing Severus to cry out in pleasure.

Harry continued to tease the man with sucking softly, until Severus growled and pulled his head away. He looked at him with dark, lustful, hungry eyes.

"I'm going to cum inside you."

Harry nodded, sitting up and unbuttoned his pants for the older man.

"Fuck me, Severus."

And Severus did just that.

Severus flipped them over again and yanked Harry's pants off, underwear and all. Severus accio'd some lube from his personal stores and coated his fingers in it before lathering his engorged dick.

"I'm going to prepare you first."

"Stop telling me what you're going to do and just do it already!" Harry demanded, huffing. Severus reached down and brushed his fingers against Harry's entrance before sliding one finger in.

Harry threw his head back and moaned, enjoying the feeling of being penetrated. Severus worked his finger until he decided Harry was ready for another.

Harry was incoherently blabbering in parseltongue and it only turned Severus on more. He had two fingers in and was scissoring him, stretching him. When he had three fingers inside the young man he decided he couldn't wait any longer. He pulled his fingers out of Harry and he whimpered at the loss.

"Don't worry," Severus mumbled against his lips, kissing him. "You will be filled by something much better. Now, lift one leg over my shoulder."

Harry nodded and lifted his leg up and Severus aligned himself at Harry's entrance, making sure their eyes were locked as he slid himself into the stretched hole.

Harry moaned so loud it was a roar and Severus almost came. "So...tight." He groaned, sheathing himself completely.

"Sssseverussss. Move!" Harry practically screamed, and Severus complied. He started moving, pulling out and pushing himself in, trying to find the right angle to hit Harry's prostate.

When he found it, he started ruthlessly pounding into the young man, hitting his prostate every time, making Harry scream his name.

They were both close. What Harry did with his tongue could bring any man to completion in a matter of minutes, and Harry was a young man with an insatiable libido.

They were grunting and moaning and Harry was muttering in the snake language, which Severus knew would only make him cum faster. It was sexy when Harry did it.

When they both came they were sweaty, sticky and exhausted.

Harry was practically asleep in his arms. "You know I don't do one night stands, correct?"

Harry nodded sleepily. "Wouldn't expect any less. That's fine by me."

"As long as you're sure."

Harry nodded again before curling up into Severus' side.

"You're sure you don't want to shower?"

Harry shook his head no, buried his face in Severus' side and fell asleep. Severus rolled his eyes and lay down next to the green-eyed man and fell asleep to the gentle sound of Harry's breathing.

xxx

And that's how he ended up where he was, naked in bed with a slumbering Harry Fucking Potter, and he wouldn't have it any other way. He wasn't quite sure where it was going, but he was pretty sure he could get used to this.

FIN!

xxx

A/N: I hope you enjoyed this lovely one-shot as much as I did. Please feel free to press the lonely review button and tell me what you think. :)

Also! In a lot of my stories I've mentioned "The Seven Deadly Sins" mostly as a band name on a t-shirt Harry is wearing. I've always imagined it as a metal wizard/muggle combo band that Harry's a part of. I've been considering writing a totally AU Snarry story with Harry in this lovely band. Not sure of an exact plot, but tell me what you guys think!

Much love to all my readers! :)