TITLE: 'I Use to Know Everything, Now I Know Nothing' (14/14)

AUTHOR: Cindy ()
RATING: A

CHARACTERS: Toby, Sam, CJ, Leo, Charlie, Jed and Josh

SUMMARY: Toby goes to the movies and gets more than he bargained for.

POV: Toby Ziegler and then the rest of the characters in 3rd view.

TIMEFRAME: After "The Two Bartlets."

***The West Wing***

Weeks had passed since the news of my being Piper's father, and I have never been happier. She has adjusted well since her arrival and eventually with the help of CJ we managed to tell her about her mother's passing. Shortly afterwards CJ and I took her to the cemetery where she was buried here in Washington. I fought with the decision of where to have her final resting place and decided that being close to Piper is what Cindy would have wanted.

I had finally gotten the nerve to ask CJ out on a date and a few more followed up quickly. Whenever I was with her I felt like a different person, a happier person which is hard to imagine because life with Piper made me extremely happy. I was also lucky because both Piper and CJ accepted one another without any problems, what more can a man ask for?

I was leaving work early so I headed up to the daycare where I found Piper drawing a picture of what was supposed to be Piper, myself and CJ. It was a lovely picture although CJ's body went from the top of the page to the bottom and I seemed to have grown less hair on top and more on my face than the original. All together though it was beautiful and I would soon add it to be among the many others that kept me company in my office.

As soon as Piper noticed me she came running towards me with her eyes bright and her lopsided ponytails flying through the air (I was told practice made perfect but so far that was a no go when it came to Piper's hair) and her arms wide open. "Daddy," she cried out as she slammed into my awaiting arms. No matter how many times one hears that it is never enough.

"Hi baby," I said to her as I gave her a big kiss. "How was your day?"

"Oh boy it was fun, I painted and I pwayed with Joshewwa (Joshella the doll) and I danced and I-" she said in one breath before I cut her off.

"It looks like you have been busy today, but we gotta get going so can you pack your stuff up for Daddy please?" Piper didn't respond, instead she ran and did as I had asked her. She grabbed her Minnie Mouse bag (for once she didn't want Barbie) and she held onto my hand as we prepared our exit from the big White House.

I started taking Piper to speech therapy last week hoping we could correct her pronunciations. It was my idea and CJ was against it saying kids are kids, let them talk the way they want. Sooner or later nobody is going to care anyways, atleast at this stage it's cute.

And although I agreed with it being cute, I sort of wanted the Massachusetts accent removed. It was time she learned how to pronounce her L's and R's. My eldest sister set up me with a private therapist that to me was very kind and educated. Piper loved going there and it gave me an hour to do whatever errands needed to be done.

Tonight was going to be a special night. I was having CJ over for dinner and Piper was going to help me prepare for the evening. I had come to trust whatever opinions she had voiced to me, except when it came to ties. After I wore that flashing one I quickly had it shredded. I can be nice but I refuse to be that nice again.

I ran into the market to grab what odds and ends I needed after dropping Piper off with Claire and then I went to the liquor store to buy a bottle of Krug's Clos du Mesnil. It's a Champagne made from a single vineyard, and it's whats called a blanc de blancs, made entirely from Chardonnay grapes. It was CJ's favourite and also one of the most expensive ones out there. I was half tempted to throw Piper in a bucket of grapes and have her stomp around like Lucy did in "I Love Lucy for that price." But I didn't think CJ would be too happy with a Ziegler made wine. Besides, it wouldn't have the bubbliness like champagne does.

On the way out I grabbed some candles from the store next door and then I was on my way to get Piper so that we could get home and start preparing. When we got in the door Piper checked the answering machine, a task she so much enjoys and told me that it was my sista calling to say hello.

Whenever someone calls and leaves a message saying hello, Piper never fails to say hello back. I don't think she understands that they can't hear her. I don't want to disappoint her so I haven't told her.

Together Piper and I washed each other's hands because we had to make sure that Mr. Bacteria wasn't looming around on us. Once we were through with that we dressed in our casual clothes including our own matching aprons. (A gift from Margaret)

Now we were ready to get to business. I don't let Piper use knives so I let her clean the vegetables and to keep her occupied but still feel like she was contributing I gave her a small potato and a peeler. She went off to work on the potato while I peeled the others and got the salmon steaks ready to go. Piper added the spices to the salmon and then we were done.

The veggies were steaming, the potatoes simmering and the salmon was sizzling away in the oven while I sat down with Piper to watch Barbie get her nuts cracked on DVD. You wouldn't believe how much I hate Barbie right about now.

While Piper was immersed in Barbie I went and prepared some appetizers, put the candles in their holders and began flipping through my CD collection for some entertainment. I finally decided on Harry Connick Jr.'s "Come by Me" a CD I highly enjoyed. I would have listened to Enya but she somehow managed to disappear the night Josh turned it off.

"Okay it's time Pipe," I yelled out to Piper who was dancing to the end credits of her movie. She turned in my direction and hid her face with her hands and started laughing. "CJ's going to be here so we have to get into the tub."

"Okee dokee," she said as skipped into her room. I let her do her thing while I myself planned out my evening wear. I didn't want to be in a suit since that was what I always wore and yet I wanted to look somewhat sophisticated still.

I was flipping through sweaters when Piper came into my room wearing her new cotton candy pink dress. It looked like a mini ballgown that a princess would wear. Piper picked it out because it looked like the one Barbie wore in the nutcracker. She managed to also put on one blue sock and one black sock and she was wearing her new Bert and Ernie slippers that CJ and the girls picked out. When she walked their heads bobbed up and down, it was slightly amusing.

I couldn't help but chuckle at her appearance for she resembled something out of a comic strip. Trying to not laugh while talking to her I said, "Honey, you have to have your bath BEFORE you put your dress on."

"But I wooks pwetty in it. Its vewy shiny." She was twirling around and pointing out her footwear.

"It sure is," I said still laughing. "And it will look prettier once you put it on after your bath. Now go strip." I was laughing so hard my back was beginning to ache a bit. She always managed to do the funniest things to me. I went back to the sweaters and was quite content with a dark blue one until I heard a voice say, "That's yucky."

I turned and looked down where a stark naked Piper stood holding her nose. "It's not yucky," I said in the sweater's defense. "And it doesn't smell either," I said a little grumpy voice.

"Ah huh," was her comeback. I looked at her and then back at the sweater. "Well then which one would you choose your Heighness?" Piper pointed to a dark gray sweater It was actually one of my favourites.

"Fine. I will wear this one. Just stop plugging your nose, it gives me the creeps," I said as I began walking to the bathroom. Our ritual was once the plug was in and the water was running Piper was in charge of the bubble bath.

And for a three-year old she had quite a selection to choose from. She decided on Disney's Dinosaur bubble bath and poured in more than required. She handed me the bottle when she was done. The bottle was already empty.

"Piper honey, we just bought this for you last week. How in the world is it already finished?" I asked shaking the bottle and taking a peek inside.

"Papa doesn't know. Maybe they didn't put it awe in the botta." Likely excuse little one, likely excuse. Perhaps it's the fact that you pour half the contents into one bath at a time.

After Piper was freshly bathed and wrapped in a towel I let her play on the floor with one of her many many flipping Barbie's. I do this so that I too can have a shower and have the sense that she is safe since I also lock the door.

It took me awhile to figure out how I could achieve getting into shower without her noticing my body. I was so not ready for those questions yet. It was the President who told me that he would go in with his briefs and then remove them once he was in the shower when his girls were young. He said it was just like as if you were on a beach swimming, no harm in a child seeing you like that.

Since I hadn't worn briefs since the early 80's I climbed into the shower in my Scooby-Doo boxers. They were a gift from my sister who sometimes still showered me with childish gifts from time to time. It didn't bother me though, they were comfy.

Once that was done I began to shave, and being Piper she too had to shave. So I got out my old Wilkinson Sword that again was from the early 80's and I removed the razor and gave it to Piper. I lathered my face with shaving cream and used what was left over to put on Piper's. She watched me at first and then she began to shave herself mimicking my moves. Had I known that being a father was going to be this rewarding I would have done it sooner. A LOT SOONER!

That little moment cost us fifteen minutes off of our post-evening time so we had to run around and get dressed fast because CJ was on her way over. I helped Piper with her leotards that she insisted were called 'wetads'. Either way it sounded to me too much like retards.

We put on her clickety shoes that she just adored wearing because they made a clicking sound like the ones that tap dancers wore. I put on black slacks and a black turtleneck and then topped it off with my 'chosen' gray sweater. Threw on some socks, I of course unlike Piper didn't require shoes, especially ones that clicked.

We made it with three minutes to spare after we sprayed ourselves with cologne and perfume. I obviously being the one to wear the cologne while Piper chose, can you guess it…..yes Barbie perfume.

There was a knock on the door and Piper got all excited that she ran to the door without waiting for me. She began talking to CJ through the door since she wasn't able to reach the chain to unlock it. A must have for any parent in this decade. I got to the door and opened it up and there stood my Goddess dressed in a soft blue spaghetti dress that if I guess correctly looked like something Vera Wang would have designed. I was getting pretty good with designers since that was all the girls at worked discussed in my presence.

"CJ, CJ we have somefing to ask you," Piper blurted out. She had apparently forgotten the plan that I had prepared and was going straight for the gold.

***Toby's***

"Whoa there, how about we let CJ in first. Maybe give her a chance to take her coat off and relax?" I suggested to the anxious three-year old.

"I guess," Piper pouted but allowed CJ to come in and get comfortable. I went into the kitchen to check on our dinner and make sure that everything was ready to be served. I began dishing out the salad when CJ offered to help me. I told her that I had everything under control and to just relax.

"I would if I actually knew how too," CJ said laughing. Piper huddled close to CJ and showed her pretty dress and explained to her how special her shoes were because they clicked.

"Wow that is cool," CJ said playing along with Piper. It's amazing how adults can pretend to be interested when they are actually not. I liked that about my friends though because they took an interest in the things that Piper talked them to death with.

"Does yo shoes do that?" Piper asked her curiously.

"No they don't. I guess I don't have a good pair like yours."

"Hmmm," Piper thought aloud. "Maybe Daddy can buy you some shoes the next time we go out shopping." She was very proud of her idea.

"I don't think CJ wants Daddy buying her shoes sweetheart."

CJ glanced over at me and then said to Piper, "You know what? I think that is a great idea." Okay so I was wrong. Wouldn't be the first time.

The preparations were ready and we all sat down at the dining table and began to eat. "This is fabulous Toby. Of all the times I have been in your house I didn't even know you owned a dining table."

"Neither did I. Ever since Piper came into my life though I seat here with her for all of our meals. I think I am beginning to get my money's worth though." We ate our meal with a little small talk and then afterwards we had dessert which I had bought. Cooking I can do but baking just isn't my style. And as long as Piper believes that my cookies are mine and not Mr. Christie's I won't ever have to do it.

With dessert over CJ and Piper helped me clear the table and I threw the dishes into the dishwasher. Soon we were ready to sit on the couch. It was 7:30 already and Piper was due to go to bed so I had to get started. I closed the blinds so that the room was somewhat dark and I lit the candles that had died out during dinner. Piper has a bad habit of blowing them out. She thinks that as long as one is lit she can make a wish and it will come true.

Harry Connick Jr. was playing and CJ was occupied with reading the booklet from the CD. I took this opportunity to take Piper into my room and I gave her a gift that I wanted her to present to CJ. With that done we both returned to CJ who had finished reading about Harry.

I sat on the couch across from CJ so that I could see her directly and Piper sat beside CJ who began playing with her hair. I have yet to figure out why women always do that.

"CJ, you and I have been friends for many years and during that time I have come to not only admire you but to respect you as well."

"Toby, that is so sweet," CJ said in return. Piper gave CJ a tiny nudge.

"You have to wet him tawk befoe he woses it," she advised CJ who quickly agreed to be quiet. Piper winked at me to let me know she had things under control now. What would I do without my sidekick I don't dare think about.

I cleared my throat and continued. "I also wanted to say that I truly appreciate everything you have done for me regarding Piper and that I couldn't have asked for a better friend than you have been to me. I know sometimes that I haven't shown you my affection the best way that I could have but I hope that tonight I will have corrected that."

I gave Piper the signal which was tapping my chest and she carefully got off of the couch and got in front of CJ. I came up from behind Piper and knelt down on knee as Piper did at the same time. Piper removed the tiny velvet box from her sweater that she had put on earlier and opened it up for CJ to see. CJ placed her hand over her chest and held her breath. She held it for so long I was starting to think she'd pass out but she did finally exhale.

"CJ, Daddy and Papa want to know if you wood maywe us?" Piper said as we had planned numerous times this past week. CJ's eyes caught mine and tears were welling in her eyes.

She looked down at Piper who was still holding the box that contained an 18k white gold ring featuring a 3.11ct emerald cut Diamond and 2 triangular cut Rubies weighing 1.70ct. The Rubies were set with 18k yellow gold prongs. It was a ring that Piper and Abbey helped me pick out and with Josh's help I discovered that CJ favoured rubies, so here it was.

The fact that it cost me more half a year's salary didn't matter to me at all. It was knowing that this ring was made for her finger that counted most important to me.

"Oh Toby-" CJ cried out still overwhelmed. Or atleast I was hoping that was what it was.

"Before you answer me I have something to say to you."

"There's more?"

"These words do not belong to me, they belong to Jud Friedman, Allen Rich and James Newton-Howard and was originally sung by Rod Stewart. Or atleast I think so. Okay," I took a deep breath and spoke these words from the bottom of my heart to the love of my life.

"Such a long time ago I had given up

on finding this emotion ever again

But you're here with me now

Yes I found you somehow

and I've never been so sure

And for the first time I am looking in your eyes

For the first time I'm seeing who you are

Can't believe how much I see

when you're looking back at me

Now I understand what love is, love is

for the first time

For the first time

Claudia Jean, will you do me the honours of making my life complete by becoming my wife?"

I was close to passing out because I was so scared of what her response would be. What would I do if she said no? I wasn't prepared for rejection. Abbey told me to think only happy thoughts. I think she is going to say something.

"Oh, Toby I-I-"

CJ looked right into my eyes and said, "I will." Sobs and sighs were heard throughout the church as we had just completed our wedding vows. That's right, she said yes and it only took CJ and the rest of the girls five months to plan out the wedding that would be the first during our administration.

I have never seen her look more beautiful and pure as she looked right now, and she was all mine.

"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss your bride." Those were the greatest 13 words a man in love could hear. I didn't want to disappoint anyone so of course I jumped right into my new husbandly duties and planted a soft but loving kiss on my wife's luscious lips. We turned to face the people who were most important to us and raised our arms. We did it!

Our friends and family rose and cheered for us and then slowly they exited the church. CJ's father and her brothers went up and congratulated her and I and I promised Mr. Cregg that I would take special care of his little girl. I was proud when he said that he had no doubts in my capability of doing exactly so, and that she married well. I didn't think that would ever have been said about me.

My sisters came running up and hugged CJ and I and planted pink and red lipstick all over my face which Piper thought was amusing. My brother David gave me our first hug in probably 30 years. That meant a lot to me. And Piper, well she of course was the main attraction. She was dressed in her 'new princess' dress as she referred to it as and let us not forget her clickety shoes that she forced us to buy her. She was our flower girl and her job was to drop rose petals down the aisle. Piper did a great job.

Standing up for me since my parents have since passed were two people who are as special to me as if they were my parents: Abbey and Jed Bartlet. The President and Dr. Bartlet if you may. Although Jed did find it his pleasure to give me away, a duty not really required for the groom but he wanted it none the less.

They congratulated us and told us how pleased they were of us both. That was important to both of us. Josh picked up Piper and gave her a big kiss. My usher did a great job when he stood up there with my brother, Charlie, Leo and CJ's three brothers. I guess you are wondering why Sam was left out? Well technically he wasn't for he was my best man.

CJ's bridesmaids were Ainsley, Bonnie, Ginger, Carol, Margaret, and both of my sisters. Donna served as her maid of honor. The two had become extremely close in the past few months and so it was without a doubt that Donna be the one chosen.

"Did you see me drop the petals Uncle Josh?" Piper asked as he held her in his arms.

"I did and you know what?"

"What?"

"You did a fantastic job and I am sooo proud of you," Josh lifted Piper higher which started her giggling and planted more kisses on her face.

"I guess we're going to be next huh Uncle Josh?" Piper stated which made Josh laugh.

"Hey Piper, I thought I was going to be your special guy?" Sam said coming over to Josh and Piper.

"You are Uncle Sam, I will marry you after I marry Uncle Josh." That will happen of course over my dead body. Since Piper had been going to speech her pronunciation had become 100% better and it was rewarding to hear how well she was now talking. I guess there isn't anything us Ziegler's can't do.

"Oh I see, okay then. As long as you don't forget me," Uncle Sam said to Piper as they rubbed noses.

"What is this I hear about you marrying up my staff?" The President said trying to sound cross with Piper. They had formed a relationship I would never had expected.

"I haven't the slightest clue to what you are talking about Papa Jed." Not only did he give her language lessons, he also gave her a grandfather. He and Abbey had asked CJ and I our opinion of Papa Jed and Nana Abbey coming into Piper's life. They both acknowledged my parents but the truth be told, Piper was indeed without grandparents and they didn't think she should be.

Who better qualified than the President of the United States and the First Lady? As for Sam, Josh, Leo and Charlie becoming known as Uncles, well that just sort of happened. I guess when a child is around you so often she just considers you a part of her family. My daughter had the best family a child could ever ask for. And now on top of all of that she had a mother.

I would never dream of taking Cindy away from Piper as she is and always will be her mommy, but atleast I could bring into her life someone who would love her as much as a mother could.

I guess there we both lucked out.

"I think it is time you two make it outside or their going to start throwing the rice at the Priest," Abbey suggested.

"Mrs. Ziegler," I held my arm out for CJ.

Taking my arm CJ said, "Let's go Mr. Ziegler." We stood looking deep into one another's eyes until the President spoke up.

"Today you two, there is alcohol and dancing to follow and I am a very thirsty man right now." Abbey poked him in the ribs for his comment. CJ and I began our way down the aisle and Piper tried running to catch up with us still dropping petals. That child takes her job very seriously. I haven't the slightest idea where she would get that from?

Right before we got to the door we heard CJ's father yell out, "Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Mr. And Mrs. Toby Ziegler," that was our cue. We went outside and with the biggest smiles on our faces that were truly filled with happiness and love we began our lives as a family. Piper stood in between us holding our hands.

It's strange because if you had asked me of all the things I knew one year ago today, I would have told you straight out that I knew it all. Well I was wrong. I will honestly tell you that I -"I used to know everything, now I know nothing."

I say that because I was the go to man for just about everything and I never had a problem with it as long as it didn't involve me personally. I can solve just about anybody's troubles, but my own…..forget that. Knowing everything makes you ignorant to the better things that surround you and it took two incredible ladies to show me that knowing everything was blinding me.

Knowing nothing, well that helps keep your mind open for the good things when they do come into your life. You treasure those things by learning about them. And by learning about them you tend to appreciate them better. Had I not known what to do about Piper in the beginning, I never would have learned what it was like to really love someone unconditionally and what it was like to take a chance on them and have them take a chance on you.

So not knowing everything gave me the unexpected. It gave me a daughter, it gave me a wife but most of all it gave myself the love and affection for and from others that I never thought I would ever consume. So I am okay with knowing nothing, knowing nothing is good for me.

***The End***