Ngoc Chau does not own Bleach

So this fic is divided up into four parts. Um, so this is about how Mayuri and Nemu's relationship first became sexual and how they became lovers.

I don't know why this fanfic is called what it is. I was just trying to be clever. Oh, and the quote below is by Woody Allen

Mayuri and Nemu didn't just become lovers so easily. It involved a great deal of misery, misunderstandings, and supressed feelings.

PART ONE - SEX RELIEVES TENSION, LOVE ONLY CAUSES IT.

This was Nemu's dream.

First she was approached by Ikkaku as he was practicing his swordsmanship skills. She had only asked him if he needed any assistance for she noticed that he had been observing her for some time. His gaze was most peculiar that she could not exactly name the fashion in which he was looking at her with. Suspicious and hesitant, she saw no reason to be truly afraid for although their divisions always quarrelled, he was still quite the gentleman to her.
He was gentle towards her, his hand extended. She felt him grip her sleeve and she could recount the seconds it took as his face came close to her, their breaths mingling together. And then she felt his mouth kiss hers, felt him accept her into his arms and hold her. The clatter of his zanpakuto falling to the ground echoed most crudely.
His mouth moved over hers so sweetly and she had to close her eyes, overwhelmed by how soft an Eleventh division officer could be. This man was one of the strongest and he could easily break her, yet he was not. They were suddenly without clothes and she saw that his body was all scarred, mementos from battle. Her heart leapt to her throat as his lips puckered and skipped down her neck, to her cleavage, her breasts…
She could not see what he was doing, so overcome by intensity and feelings that she reared her head back and felt her eyes to be rolling back into her skull. She felt all those nice feelings dance over her skin, her toes curling, his hands holding her as though she was some great treasure. She murmured in deliria, and felt his tongue dragging from the mounds of her thighs upwards to her.
She concentrated hard to look at him when he returned to her level.

But it was not him that looked deeply at her. She recognized the face instantly to be Akon. He carried the same serious expression on his face, but his eyes appeared brighter. She had always known that he harboured other than friendliness for her. It was by the way that he always tended to her whenever Mayuri was not there or how he would always find some opportunity or exploit some chance to touch her bare skin. Thus she always stayed as distance from him as she could. Why would she be with him now?
His mouth on her neck distracted her and she tried desperately to reject him but found that she could not muster up the strength or will to do so. They were not outside anymore. They were on a bed somewhere. She did not want to see him and so tried to twist away from him, turn her back on him. She half expected him to leave and for Ikkaku to come back, but it was not so. She felt his hands trace her sides, the fingers rough and the nails scratching into her. His strong legs were on both sides of her and she felt his stomach press onto her back. Heat was shared between the two of them that she leaned back, wanting more.
His kissed the blades of her shoulders, and mumbled sweet incomprehensible things into her back. She yelped when his hand squeezed her rear. She turned around to protest when, as she did so, he grabbed onto her hand and flipped her onto her back. His long time crept out of his mouth and lapped at her breasts like they were sweet fruits with juices running down instead of sweat-soaked endowments. His mouth played with her nipples, feeling them grow sturdier by the second and by every flick of his tongue.
She could not stop herself from wrapping her arms around him as he pressed his body against hers, looked down on her from his view. She could not see what was happening down below but she could feel it acutely, him moving inside of her. She tossed her head about, screaming and moaning.

When she again tried to regain control of herself, she saw that it was not Akon anymore who was with her. Thrice now the person had changed and now it had taken on the form of Mayuri. But it was not how everyone saw him. Instead he was how she always saw him in his rare moments when he was alone and was sure that no one else save her was watching him. Her hand gripped onto his scarred flesh, and she buried herself into his chest. She felt desire shoot through her when he said her name. She repeated it back to him. It was him that was entering her, that was making her sweat and caterwaul. This was a man that she had spent more of her life with than anyone else, a man that had raised her since she could remember and guarded her carefully. Her want of him only increased when she steadied her eyes on his form through tears and saw what his mouth could do to her chest.
She whimpered, obviously raw from the gesture and unable to cope with what was happening to her body and herself below but claw onto anything in her way, like someone drowning whose only instinct was to grab anything to keep afloat. His hands handled her flesh like one experienced, she was particularly sensitive in any place he touched and she only wondered if he knew where such spots were or if he was the one causing it. He enveloped her, consumed all her senses until he was all that she was conscious of and no one else. It was not so different, he already monopolized all of her attentions awake. But here he was returning her own thoughts to her, instead of hoarding it all to himself.
She felt herself more eager to please him as he pleased her. They tumbled together, both of them utterly wrapped up in each other. She knew him better than anyone else, but not even she could've suspected that he would be so lover-like. She supposed that she must be going insane because she had never thought that she would receive such gratification from her creator, she thought she would only know knowledge and pain: that the two went hand in hand with each other. Never did she ever imagine that she would feel this from him. She was atop of him, looking down at him with a new perspective that she dared not to dream or even think about. His flushed face, dark and getting redder, was enough to encourage her to continue her rocking her hips against his.

Then it was not only him. As she moved atop him, riding him like he was some stallion to tame and she a wild girl, she felt another set of hands cup her aching hanging breasts while Mayuri's still gripped her hips and guided her how and where to move. Briefly, she turned to look over her shoulder and saw Ikkaku sucking upon her back, his lips beautifully shaped as it pressed onto the small hill of her shoulder. Another set of hands touched and a tongue, she sought its source and saw Akon's head at her chest, he was leaning against Mayuri's chest. Mayuri continued his invasion of her in her loins. Her arms wrapped around who was closest, who was farthest.

And suddenly she woke up in perspiration, her long hair clinging to her face and hands. She rose, her legs crossed and twisted together even tighter. She was feeling an effect; a pain between her legs that practically cried that it needed something there. She knew what but was not sure. Nemu laid her head back down on her pillow and tried to will herself to sleep but found that se could not. Her mind was plagued with visions and thoughts prior to waking, the pleasures and sensations she had experienced in the sleeping world was still strong. Absent-mindedly, her hand traveled to the triangle of her legs and she pressed her fingers there.

There was hardly a satisfied feeling, but it still wanted more. She pressed firmer yet did not feel satiated, in fact she felt as though she was prolonging the pain between her legs. Tempted to try and recreate the movement of the men and what had come inside her, she did not play on the temptations for fear and the bash of touching herself down there. She was condemned another sleepless night, the second time this week.

Though truthfully, the dreams of stimuli had begun no more than five months ago.

Despite Nanao being the vice-president, the duty of escorting the President of the Shinigami Women Association always fell upon Nemu for many reasons: that Yachiru liked her a lot because she was always willing to follow orders from her superiors, that Nemu was perhaps the only one in tip-top shape enough to keep up with the sugar-energized shinigami girl, and that both divisions of the two lieutenants were adjacent to each other. There were other reasons and other motives but Nemu did not like to dwell upon what others thought about her captain. As long as he still had the respect he deserved from his position as captain, then Nemu knew that she did not really have to ask for more for him(except maybe more willing volunteers for their work). Upon walking up to the gates of the Eleventh barracks with Yachiru, she was confronted with Ikkaku and Yumichika.

She saw that Ikkaku had his zanpakuto slung over his shoulder and she could see the beads of sweat trickle down the side of his face, his scalp was shiny.
Yumichika, neat as always, bowed to her and greeted politely, "Ah! Kurotsuchi-fukutaicho. How nice to see you again. And thank you for bringing Yachiru here."

She bowed her head slightly, responded, "It was to no inconvenience of me."

Yachiru went in ahead, calling out her captain's name and laughing.

Yumichika smiled to her, and the two of them chatted about nothing. Though it was more like Yumichika was doing all the talking and she could only reply, "yes" and "no." Still, Nemu appreciated talking about something besides gossip, club events, and work. It was quite refreshing for her to have small talk with someone else.
Then Yumichika elbowed Ikkaku, "Ikkaku, aren't you going to say something to Kurotsuchi-fukutaicho. You've just been standing there for the past ten minutes without saying a single word."

She remarked to herself that Ikkaku would not look at her and that he kept his eyes glued to the ground.

He stuttered as he spoke, "You've been doing all the talking."

With that, Yumichika turned on his heel with a huff. Then it was just the two of them. Nemu felt her face flush as she recalled past dreams that involved him and his shihakusho off. She felt a wetness between her legs and so desired that he would take charge of this opportunity alone to kiss her as he often did in her dreams. Why was he so confident in reveries but so distant towards her in real life. She thought it quite unfair. She looked up slightly to notice that he was blushing as well.

"I suppose that I should be going now, Madarame-san." she told him.

He nodded, "Yeah. Yeah. I guess I'll see you around sometimes, Kurotsuchi-fukutaicho."

As she bowed, he did too, and for a few moments, they could feel each others' breaths over their faces. She felt shivers in her stomach, in her gut, traveling down her feet. She could simply lean forward and press her mouth to him to kiss him. But he withdrew away with an even redder head and asked if she would be coming back next week to pick up Yachiru for their club meetings.

She discreetly looked away, hoping to shield away her blushing face. "Yes," she answered, "I will be here again next week."

She headed back to her division.

It was a luxury for her to go to club meetings when her captain wanted her to work instead. But because of Unohana's prompting that letting her interact with other people than scientists would be good for her development and growth as a young lady. Mayuri was of course reluctant but since the Shinigami Women Association was in charge of funding distribution, it would suffice it to say that he had hardly any choice in the matter.
But Nemu would always try to make up his loss by working harder when the time came closer to her club meetings and to make him his favourite dinner on meeting days. The scientists and shinigami all in the labs greeted her when she entered, asking her how her club meeting went and if she needed them to get anything for her. She responded in kind and fell right into schedule with her work, slipping easily into the flow as though she had been there the whole time.

She found momentary peace in work, letting it cloud over distasteful thoughts in her head, yet small shards of the dreams still came clear to her and sometimes she was left thinking beyond the dreams, imagining newer and more scenarios that would leave her and another unclothed in each others' arms.

"Fukutaicho. Are you alright?"

She turned her head to the source of the voice and saw Akon. She willed herself to face him, to not turn away. Besides Mayuri, he was talented at noticing the most minute details about her. She replied with an even voice, "Yes, Akon-san. I'm alright." She moved away from him, trying to get her heart to settle. He followed after her through the bustling of the labs, though the two were swift to dodge anybody passing by.

"You seem out of it. Are you sleeping well enough?" His concern for her was quite endearing, and yet it unsettled her for she knew that she could never show him the same that he offered her. It did not seem right.

She answered that she was sleeping well.

There was an interesting expression on his face when she answered him. "Fine. Just take care of yourself." he informed her.

She nodded and thanked him for the concern that he was showing her.

He told her that it was because she was the Chief's daughter that he was being nice, he owed a lot to him.

Nemu did not want to continue working but she felt it her obligation since she was almost foreseeing disturbing Mayuri with her problems. Today would be the day she would tell him, today would be the day she would ask what was wrong with her. So she worked the rest of the day, constantly having to remind herself to concentrate and not let her mind wander. But it was quite difficult. Akon and Ikkaku had left her thoughts for in their presence, she had felt the nightly musings to be nothing that need be taken too seriously. But there was Mayuri. It was both in dreaming and in waking that he remained constant to her. And she always felt on the verge of fainting when she saw him.

She decided to confront him about herself when she was to report to him for the hour.

And there he was at his computer, typing away at reports. She felt his irritation, he did not want to be disturbed.

Nervously, she approached him. "Mayuri-sama." she called out.

"What?" he replied harshly.

She almost winced. "I have something that I would like to ask you, Mayuri-sama."

The clacking of the keys did not stop but continued at a faster speed in fact. She came closer, her heart pounding in her ears and afraid. He knew her well. "Nemu! Hurry up and spit it out! I'm busy!" he yelled, the sounds of the keys appeared being pounded upon appeared louder and she mistook it for her imagination.

The words rushed out of her mouth, "I believe that something is wrong with me!"

He stopped immediately and the silence almost sounded deafening. He turned around in his chair to face her and she gripped her palms to keep from exclaiming at the death glare he was giving her. He was busy! She could've sensed it as soon as she stepped into the room. This was no deadline for one of his experiments but for paperwork that was to be handed in at the end of the month. He simply detested shinigami paperwork.

"What" he spat, "could possibly be wrong with you?" His gaze was icy and if looks could kill, she was sure that she would already be dead ten times.

Her eyes were glued to her shoes. She was suddenly frightful that she should not be telling him these things. That she should've bore it the best she could because she feared that her answers would lead to her destruction as a failed being. Though she had achieved shikai, she knew that she should not be so cocky to think that he would not get rid of her.

Her silence infuriated him. "Answer me, you dullard!"

She answered quickly, "Strange things have been happening to my body that I cannot control well and I have been dreaming strange things." Despite how emotionless she could make herself sound, she was utterly embarrassed to be telling him things such as that. He narrowed his eyes at her and she continued, "It hurts between my legs down there, the walls close in together hard and I feel a tightness there. In certain company of men, my heart beats faster and I feel it a greater task to breath around them. At night I dream of you touching me, of me wanting you." That tell-tale ache was making its appearance even as she was speaking to him. "I feel weak around you. I want to kiss you. I want you."

His expression changed to wide eyes and the mouth agape, the face of a man shocked. And she sensed that he was feeling just that now.

She was worried she had said something that she should not have said.

I don't know why, but I just feel out of it: I find myself not enjoying fanfiction anymore when I write lemons or smut...

But oh my! Mayuri is shocked! What will happen next?

Stay tuned!

But seriously... what did you think? Any complaints? Anything you would like me to fix?