Title: Universal Constants
Characters: Jo Lupo, Zane Donovan, and SARAH
Disclaimer: I do not own Eureka, or its characters... no copyright infringement is intended and no profit is made.
Spoilers: ep 4x18 This one time at Space Camp
Author's note: God, okay. This is not the first version of this story I've written. I've written this conversation after practically every episode of season 4.5. And this one is dark and will never happen on the show. But how I wish it would. Because honestly, the writers really don't get what they did to Jo. And neither does Zane.
Companion piece to What one Wants but can be read alone.
Universal Constants
Jo came down the steps, rubbing a hand over her face and squinting in the half-light that SARAH provided. She'd been sleeping and quite soundly too, until SARAH had woken her up.
"I'm sorry Jo, I asked him to come back in the morning but he's insisting." The smart house apologized again.
Jo shook her head as she passed the living room. "It's okay SARAH. You can open the door."
The door immediately swung open and Jo shivered a little as cool air blew inside, crossing her arms. Dressed only in a tank top and pajama bottoms she frowned at Zane as he stepped inside.
"It's 2 o'clock in the morning, Zane. What's going on?" She asked.
She was taken aback by the glare he sent her way as the door shut again behind him. "I need to talk to you." He said angrily.
Jo nodded slowly. "Uh SARAH, run full body scan, please." She said.
"Of course, Jo." The House replied.
Zane frowned at her. "I'm fine." He snapped.
Jo nodded, dropping her arms to seem a little less confrontational. "Of course. We're you at GD before you came here? Are you working on something?"
"Oh, for God's sake." Zane mumbled irritably, "I was at home. I'm fine, alright. No rage inducing beams, or music with hidden messages or gas messing with my head. Just you."
"Okay, what?" Jo asked, surprised.
"Scan complete. No foreign entities or abnormal brain waves detected." SARAH interrupted. "However, there are increased adrenaline and serotonin levels and heart right is high, indicating anger."
"Yes." Zane said, pointing at Jo. "I'm angry at you. So I came here to talk."
"Should I wake Sheriff Carter?" SARAH asked, the artificial voice expressing concern.
"No, SARAH, thank you. It's alright." Jo said.
"This couldn't wait for a more decent time?" She asked Zane.
He glowered at her. "I want an explanation." He told her. "And frankly, I think I deserve a better one than what you told me."
Jo sighed. She'd asked Zane to meet her at Café Diem that night so she could tell him she'd withdrawn from Astreaus, but instead he'd walked in just as she was telling Carter. He'd been surprised and upset and even his own passing of the final interview hadn't been enough to improve his mood. While everyone else was celebrating he'd just been tense and quiet, and she hadn't been able to get him out of it. He'd simply stared at the counter in resigned silence, flinching away from her when she'd put a hand on his shoulder.
He'd left when the celebrations became too much, with a muttered farewell and barely a glance in her direction. Since then she'd been waiting for him to calm down so they could talk. Apparently he'd taken the two days since the announcement of the 20 candidates to brood instead.
"Look Zane, I'm sorry about this. And I wish I had a better explanation for you, but I don't." Jo said. "I realized that going to Titan wasn't what I really wanted."
Zane rolled his eyes. "That's crap." He said, stepping closer to her. "You quit. We worked so hard on this and we were going to make it through the Astreaus project together, and then we do and you quit. Without telling me, hours before you would've been selected. So, I want to know why you dumped me."
He shook his head. "Or you know what, that's not right. We were never dating, so you can't dump me. I want to know why you quit the Astreaus project. Because it's more than just going to Titan. You've been against this from the start. I mean I tried Jo, I would've given us a shot and you just shut me down from day one."
Jo stared at him. "Now? You want to do this now? In the middle of the night in Carter's living room?" she asked incredulously.
"When else would we do this?" Zane exclaimed. "It's not like we ever talk! All you ever say is that we'd be terrible together and that we wouldn't work, and then you go on saying that it's just sex and that you don't care about me." He snorted angrily. "But then you go and fight on my behalf to get me pardoned so I can go to Titan, and I tell you I'm leaving Eureka and you do nothing." He stared at her in challenge.
Jo narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms, regarding him coolly.
Zane threw up his hands. "Supposedly we're friends and then you go and do this. We were going to go together. So you know what, I think I deserve an explanation." He rounded on her. "You can tell me all you like that you didn't really want to go, but we've been working for this for weeks. I was there with you. You wanted to go. And it's right there within reach and you give up."
He took a deep breath, lowering his voice as he stared her down. "There aren't many universal constants, but here's one: Jo Lupo doesn't quit." He said. "So what, the prospect of me being a billion miles away for six months was too good to pass up?"
Jo tilted her head, slowly uncrossing her arms. "Are you done?" she asked impassively.
Zane raised an eyebrow and Jo nodded, reigning in her temper. "Okay. Go home." She told him.
"Jo! For once, will you just answer me!" He exclaimed.
"Zane, it's late, you clearly haven't slept and now is not a good time to be having this conversation. I'm trying really hard not to hold this against you, so please leave." Jo said through clenched teeth.
"It's never going to be a good time." Zane snapped. "So how about we just get things out in the open?"
She turned steely eyes at him. "That's not how it works Zane. You don't get to decide the terms to suit you. Relationships are about two people, not just about you."
"Like this is a relationship." Zane scoffed. "You've been so focused on the fact that your other relationship failed, that you were determined not to even try with me. You fought against having any real feelings, or anything more than sex. You wouldn't even give us a shot."
"Foreknowledge of another time-line is not a good reason to start a relationship, Zane!" Jo bit out angrily. "The one thing you conveniently keep forgetting is that the only reason you even know about any of this is because I made the mistake of chucking an engagement ring at your head."
She glared at him. "He proposed to me Zane. I was going to marry him." She rolled her eyes. "You're playing your games, trying to get me to ask you to stay. And for what? Henry and Grace made it work because he told her he was going to earn his place in her life. That he'd earn the right to be her husband. Do you remember what you told me? That if we were something to each other before, maybe we were supposed to be something now too." She snorted in derision.
"I lost the man I loved, the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with it and it nearly killed me. And you want me to go through all that again, for maybe? For the off chance that we survive each other and you'll fall in love with me."
She stepped forward, her hands clenched into fists. "I know how this story ends Zane. With you on one knee proposing. Did you ever think of that?" She said fiercely. "And what happens when you realize that you're not relationship material. That you're not the settling down type. 'Sorry Jo, gave it a shot, but it's not for me.'" She mocked.
"I already lost you once, but I should just put everything on the line again for your ego. Your wounded pride?" she asked in contempt.
Zane swallowed and Jo smirked sadly at him, shaking her head.
"He loved me. But we were a disaster together. Two people both too stubborn for our own good and we were constantly fighting. He was an insensitive jerk at times and I'm sure I wasn't the easiest person to live with either." She bit her lip. "But he loved me and at the end of the day, that was enough. At the end of the day we confronted chaos and mayhem and we got through it together and the rest of it didn't matter. I don't know if that would've been enough to get us through marriage, but we would've tried."
Jo stepped back, forcing herself to unclench the fists she'd been making. "You couldn't stand me not too long ago, but I became a puzzle that you had to figure out." She said dryly. "Well congratulations, you've solved the mystery!"
She stared him down. "But here's the thing. Not everything is about you. I'm not going to Titan, because I realized that I don't have to. It wasn't to spite you or some backhanded attempt to get rid of you. It was about me. I made that decision for me."
Jo wanted to hold onto the anger, but she couldn't keep the disappointment out of her voice. "And if you really need a reason as to why I didn't want to start anything with you, then maybe you should consider how many times you've asked yourself how I felt." She told him.
"In all your anger and indignation and wondering how I could possibly turn you down, did the thought ever even cross your mind to look at it from my perspective?" she asked. "I'm sure you thought that offering me 'maybe' would make me jump for joy, but you're forgetting that he offered me forever."
She pressed her lips together for a moment. "And if I had any doubts or hope that maybe you had changed and I could risk it… Tonight cured me of that." She let out a shuddered breath as the energy drained out of her. "So, I'm sure you can let yourself out."
Zane stared at her in stunned horror as she turned around and made her way out of the living room and up the stairs.
He swallowed painfully and shoved his hands into his pockets, his finger touching cool metal. He slowly pulled the ring out of his pocket and stared at it. He'd had a speech. An angry speech about impossible standards and her not letting go of the past and giving him a fair chance. It included the fact that she'd initially not answered the proposal and it ended with him throwing the ring at her this time. It had all seemed so black and white on the ride over here.
God, he was an ass. And he was pretty sure he'd just screwed up any chance with Jo. Be it as friends or something more. As anything at all.
"SARAH?" he asked the room quietly.
There was silence for a long moment.
Finally, "Yes?"
Zane winced. For a house she sure sounded pissed.
"Where should I leave this so Jo will find it?" he asked.
There was a soft snapping sound and then a panel on the wall shifted and a box slid out. "I can send it up to her room." SARAH said tersely.
Zane nodded and walked over to the small panel, pausing to grab the pad of paper and pen that were lying on the side table. He tore off a sheet and scribbled a short message, placing the ring on top of it in the box.
He pushed the box back and the panel slid silently back into place. "Thank you." He said.
SARAH didn't reply but the door swung open and he left the house silently. He'd screwed up. God, he was a self-righteous ass and he'd screwed up big time and how the hell was he supposed to fix this? Fargo had told him that he didn't deserve Jo. And dammit if he hadn't proved him right. But he was stuck in this too. Jo may have lost her Zane, but he'd never had her. God, none of this was fair. Not from his perspective and definitely not from hers. Though that wasn't something he'd considered. He wasn't sure he deserved all of that, but a good part of it was justified. Which sucked.
He slowly pulled his helmet on, and swung up onto his bike. Maybe the small gesture would help. He could only hope.
In her room, Jo stared at the ring in her palm and reread Zane's words.
'Universal constant: I'm an insensitive jerk,
we will fight a lot, but our story ends with this.'
Her fingers closed around the ring. They were a disaster. Two people both too stubborn for their own good. And damn it all, if she couldn't love him just as easily now, as before.
~END
I'm not sure what it is. But with only two episodes left this season, I'm losing hope for a proper Jo/Zane resolution. And I guess this is me coping. It's a shame really, because it's a storyline that had a lot of potential and it was downplayed for some reason.
Jo is going through hell and it really bothers me that no one acknowledges that.