Welcome to PhantomTV: Danny, Sam, and Tucker's YouTube Channel! This is where your favorite gang answers all your random and hilarious questions (while getting severely off-topic sometimes), and invites you to hang out with them whenever you want!
Please note: the first two "episodes" are available in my collection of one-shots titled Puddles.
In case you haven't read those yet, here's the setting: Danny, Sam, and Tucker are in college, and are living together in a house. Danny and Sam are definitely still together in a relationship, and all three of them are still the best of friends.
Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom, YouTube, Twitter, or any other social media site, nor am I affiliated in any way with Hershey's, or Barney the Purple Dinosaur. And um, I have no connection to Olivia Wilde or Rebecca Black. Not sure if that was necessary to put in this…
Episode 3: Would You Rather…
"Welcome baaaaaack everyone!" Danny's usual bright smile greeted the camera. "I'm so glad you enjoyed our last episode, even though it was in its raw and un-edited form. I guess no one really minds our randomness?" He laughed and moved aside to reveal Sam and Tucker sitting on the couch behind him. He sat down next to Sam and opened his mouth to address the camera once more when he turned to glance at his two friends. "Um, what exactly are you two doing?"
"Staring contest," answered Sam casually.
"Loser has to do the dishes," added Tucker, narrowing his eyes.
"You mean you're going to have to do the dishes."
Tucker snorted. "Keep dreaming, Sammy-kins."
Sam ignored his annoying usage of her nickname. "I can see your eyes watering."
"And I can see your resolve melting away with your false words."
Danny raised his eyebrow at the two and grabbed three sheets of paper off the coffee table. "Anyways…I'll just…keep talking…" He finally returned his focus back to the camera. "Okay, so this week, we decided to come up with three 'Would You Rather' questions for each other. I know what you're all thinking, 'Hey! You're not going to answer the questions that we asked?' and don't worry; we'll answer them next week. We're actually just waiting for more questions, so be sure to send us more using the link below! Anyways, I came up with questions for Sam, Sam came up with questions for Tuck, and Tuck came up with questions for me, and we have no idea what they are." He turned back to the two and sighed. "Are you guys done yet?"
"Almost," replied Sam coolly, "Look at Tuck squirm under the power of my glare."
"I am not!" denied Tucker through gritted teeth. He started squinting one eye, and then the other.
All of a sudden Sam shouted, "NEEDLES!"
Tucker cried out and clamped his hands over his eyes. No sooner than he had done that he uncovered his eyes and exclaimed, "Hey! Cheater!"
Sam merely crossed her arms smugly and leaned back into the couch. "Looks like you're the dishwasher for tonight!"
Tucker made a defeated grunting noise and sank back into the couch also, mumbling something incoherent while rubbing furiously at his eyes.
Danny smiled and straightened the paper in front of him. "I guess I'll start then, with my first question for Sam."
"Bring 'em on," said Sam, still feeling triumphant.
"Okay then," replied Danny, trying to keep from laughing as he glanced at the questions, "So Sam, would you rather listen to Tucker sing for 24-hours non-stop—"
Sam made a gagging noise and Tucker stuck his tongue at her.
"—or wear some obnoxiously bright color—like hot pink—to class for a week?"
Sam gawked at Danny. "How about neither!"
Danny shook his head and grinned. "Nope, you have to choose one."
Tucker laughed and nudged Sam playfully with his elbow "You know you want me to serenade you, Sammy-kins. I can sing you Rebecca Black's 'Friday' all day long!"
Sam grimaced at him and slowly turned back to Danny. "I think I would rather hot pink for a year than listen to Tucker sing that song for even one millisecond."
Tucker sat up. "Really? Well in that case..." He inhaled deeply, but before he could open his mouth, he was met with the side of a projectile pillow courtesy of Sam.
"Save your breath, Tuck, for the questions I came up for you."
Tucker placed the pillow on his lap and stretched out his arms behind him. "Bring it, sistah!"
"Would you rather," Sam began, grinning, "Gain 100 pounds of pure fat, or eat a plate of kale and Brussels sprouts at every meal—including breakfast—for a week straight?" Beside her, Danny exploded into a fit of laughter.
Tucker scowled. "Those are both terrible options!"
"You have to choose one," replied Sam.
"Okay, well since 100 pounds of fat will last for a while even with my rigorous work-out regime—"
Sam snorted, which Tucker ignored.
"—while a week of that nasty, disgusting, atrocious, slimy green stuff—" Tucker involuntarily shuddered, "—will only be for a week…I guess I'll just have to go with the plates of pathetic excuses for food."
"What, you don't want to be Tucker the Tubular Tub of Lard?"
"Nah," responded Tucker, reaching for his sheet of questions from Danny, "I'll leave that to you, Miss Chocoholic."
"I can still run faster and for a longer distance than you, you know!"
"Anyways-next-question-moving-on-now!" interrupted Tucker quickly, clearing his throat, "So Danny! Would you rather be really gassy for a day and fart non-stop, or have Tourette's during a live nationally televised interview?"
Sam grabbed another pillow and smashed her face into it, but her muffled laughter could still be clearly heard.
Danny stared at Tucker incredulously, before finally speaking between sporadic laughs. "Are you serious? Wait…so…Tourette's is when you just uncontrollably…and randomly…start swearing loudly, right?"
"Yeah," grinned Tucker, "It'll be like…Well, boys and girls, when I battle ghosts I—" The next few choice words coming from his mouth were beeped out. "—and then I suck them into the Fenton Thermos."
Danny actually then started coughing from laughing so hard. Finally he managed to calm down and answer. "Um, then I would so choose being gassy for a day! I'll just lock myself up in a well-ventilated room or something. There's no way I want to become Danny Phantom the Potty Mouth."
"Just Danny Phantom Smells-Like-A-Potty," joked Sam.
Danny turned his attention to her. "Speaking of potties—" Sam made a disgusted face. "—would you rather babysit three bratty toddlers for a week, or eat steak at one meal?"
"Steak?" exclaimed Sam.
"Yes, steak!" said Tucker excitedly, "Rare, medium-rare—the best way to eat steak, by the way—medium, or well-done—also known as eating a leather boot!" He leaned back and rubbed his stomach thoughtfully.
"I don't like kids," muttered Sam.
"Hey, you're making me eat kale and baby cabbage heads, so only fair you get to try one of the finest delicacies the world has to offer!"
"They're not baby cabbage heads!" retorted Sam.
"If it quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, and probably tastes like a duck, then it's a duck!"
Danny sighed off to the side and propped his head up with his arm. "I never thought I was going to be the one babysitting bratty toddlers," he muttered.
"You've never even tried cabbage!" continued Sam.
"Nor do I ever want to!"
"Exactly! So who are you to say that Brussels sprouts are baby cabbages?"
"Um, because they look like them?"
Danny started to softly run his fingers through Sam's hair, which caught her attention and she turned to face him. "Sam, toddlers or steak?"
To her left Tucker snickered. "That sounds like you're ordering side dishes…"
Sam rolled her eyes. "I choose toddlers."
"You're just saying that because you don't want to give me the satisfaction of picturing you eating steak!"
"Whatever Tucker, how about you picture me doing something else, like throwing your computer off a cliff?"
Tucker blanched. "You wouldn't dare!"
Sam raised her eyebrow at him and Tucker immediately backed down. "Okay… maybe you would…"
"Speaking of dares, Tucker," continued Sam, still keeping her eyebrow raised at him, "Would you rather do the Macarena in the middle of campus in your underwear during lunchtime, or have a picture of you picking your nose on the front page of the newspaper?"
Danny exploded in laughter and leaned to the side, his face disappearing off camera, but his shaking shoulders were still visible and his guffaws still audible.
Tucker scoffed. "Psh, that's easy! Who wouldn't want to see this body dance?" He made a motion to lift his shirt up, but only revealed half his abdomen before being halted by Sam.
"Ugh Tucker, please keep your shirt on so you don't scare away everyone."
"You're just jealous you don't have a killer six-pack like me."
Sam stared haughtily at Tucker. "Really."
Danny, who had finally stopped laughing and had caught his breath, entered the conversation. "Um, Tuck, actually she kind of…does…"
Tucker's jaw dropped, and he threw his hands into the air. "I can never win…!"
Sam grinned and leaned her head on Tucker's shoulder. "You know we love you Tuuuuuck. I just can't help but always be better than you."
Tucker grunted. "Gee thanks." But he still smiled back at her.
"So, when you two are done flirting, can I get my question?" interjected Danny jokingly.
Sam quickly removed her head from Tucker's shoulder and rolled her eyes. "Gross, Danny."
"Okay, would you rather be stuck in a closet for an hour with the Box Ghost," read Tucker from his paper, "Or Youngblood?"
Danny groaned. "Oh man, well both are annoying as f…udge!" He quickly made an embarrassed face at the camera.
Sam laughed. "Yeah, can you imagine if that closet contained boxes?"
"Or toys? Or candy?" added Tucker. "I bet Youngblood was probably nuts over those two things when he was, um, alive."
"At least I can probably get the Box Ghost to shut-up," reasoned Danny, "Youngblood would just keep…doing and saying annoying stuff."
Sam stuck out her pointer finger and traced it around Danny's arm, a centimeter above his skin. "I'm not touching you! I'm not touching you!" she teased, before giggling loudly.
"Sam, are you okay?" asked Danny, "You seem really…hyper this evening."
"There was a sale on Hershey's Kisses today," answered Tucker simply.
"Oh! Speaking of which!" Sam climbed over the back of the couch and padded into the kitchen, and returned just as quickly as she left, climbing gracefully back into her seat. She raised a bag full of colorfully wrapped chocolates in her hand. "Ta-da!"
"That's only one of like…a dozen bags she bought today," sighed Tucker.
"Hey! Chocolate has natural antioxidants and also stimulates the production of endorphins!"
"Whatever makes you happy, sweetie," smiled Danny, pulling Sam close. He paused and looked at the next question on his sheet for Sam, and added with a grin, "Because your last question probably won't make you happy at all."
Sam peeked at the sheet and immediately scowled. "No no no."
"What's the question?" asked Tucker curiously.
"For Halloween, would you rather dress up as a Disney princess, or a sexy French maid?" read Danny.
"Ha!" Tucker laughed, "That's priceless. Please dress up as Snow White. Or better yet, Aurora, so you have to wear pink!"
Sam continued to glower and pulled open the bag of chocolates. "Why a French maid, out of all things?"
"Probably because that's what Danny wants to see you in," whispered Tucker with a smirk.
Sam unwrapped a Hershey's Kiss, blatantly ignoring the comment. Danny just cleared his throat loudly and looked away, muttering something inaudible.
"Actually," began Sam slowly, "I was thinking of being a sexy cop for Halloween this year."
Tucker's jaw dropped.
Sam continued, not looking up from her chocolate, "With hand-cuffs and everything."
This time, Danny's jaw dropped too.
Sam finally noticed the silence and looked up. "What?"
Danny was staring at her dreamily, while Tucker looked like he wanted to gauge his eyes out.
"Please do that," murmured Danny.
"Please do not," argued Tucker, "Sam and sexy should not go together."
Sam popped the chocolate into her mouth and chewed. "Why not?"
"Um, same reason why you wouldn't want to see me wearing nothing but briefs and a bow-tie and gyrating to 'It's Raining Men'!"
Sam gagged and started coughing violently, which caused Danny to snap out of his reverie and pat her back alarmingly. "UGH!" She finally yelled out, "WHY DID YOU HAVE TO PUT THAT IMAGE INTO MY HEAD!"
"You started it!"
"But I never added any disturbing action words, or a freaking theme song!"
"Oh whatever! We both know what those hand-cuffs are going to end up cuffing at the end of the night anyways!"
"Yeah! You to a pole so I can beat the living crap out of you with my baton!"
Tucker opened his mouth to retaliate, but an awkward silence fell between him and Sam as they both considered the double-meaning to her words. Suddenly they burst out laughing and wouldn't stop, because each time they would compose themselves even the slightest amount, one would look at the other and the laughter would resume again.
Finally Sam collapsed into Danny—who had been chuckling to himself the entire time too—and managed to steady her breathing.
Tucker also leaned back and wiped away some tears. "Oh man…that was a good one."
Sam nodded and exhaled. "Classic. Oh boy…okay we better continue. Um…" Sam picked up her piece of paper and read her last question for Tucker. "Would you rather be stuck in a brightly-lit room with no furniture that had Barney's 'I Love You' song on replay for 24 hours, or be forced to miss a date with—wait, Tucker who's your favorite female celebrity?"
"At the moment? Olivia Wilde. Mmm she's hot…" Tucker's eyes glazed over slightly for a moment.
"Okay, or be forced to miss a date with Olivia Wilde."
Tucker's eyes refocused again in an instant. "What! No!"
"Then you'll have to be stuck listening to the big purple dinosaur sing to you for an entire day, non-stop!"
"Heck, I'd even eat a plate of baby cabbage heads while picking my nose for the camera and listening to the big purple dinosaur for a week if it meant getting a date with Olivia Wilde!"
Danny laughed. "Sam is so going to hold you to that, you know, because knowing her parents, they probably have some sort of connection to Olivia Wilde."
Tucker flashed a gigantic smile at Sam. "Really?"
Sam snorted. "No. They own a business, not a film corporation."
Tucker's face fell. "Aww, boo!" he whined dramatically.
"But," added Sam with a crafty grin, "If I ever do get the chance to meet her, you better get your fingers ready to pick some boogers and your ears ready for some Barney tunes!"
Tucker jumped up again. "So you do know her!"
Sam merely shrugged and reached for yet another Hershey's Kiss. "Next question, Tucker."
"Right," said Tucker, and he peered at his paper, "Last question of the night! But certainly not the least…So Danny, after a hard night of partying and not remembering anything, would you rather wake up next to Paulina—"
Sam choked and started coughing again.
"—or Mr. Lancer?"
Danny's facial expression was torn between worry for Sam as he gently patted her back again, and the hilarious absurdity of Tucker's question.
Sam glared at Tucker, and looked actually quite menacing since her face was turning red. "Are you serious? That's our last question of the night?"
"With, or without clothes?" asked Danny, slightly apprehensive.
Tucker threw up his hands, smirking. "Whatever floats your boat, man."
"I wouldn't want either of them floating in my boat!" groaned Danny, "Um, no offense Paulina… or Mr. Lancer… if you're watching this," he added as an afterthought to the camera.
"Hey, at least you know Mr. Lancer would probably just conk out and go to sleep," reasoned Sam.
"But if it were Paulina it would give you a legitimate reason to finally beat her up after all those years," added Danny.
"Nah," declined Sam, "I have better things to do in my life… like eating Hershey's Kisses!" She popped another unwrapped chocolate into her mouth and looked at Danny gleefully.
Danny stared back at her with a lopsided smile. "Why are you so cute?"
"And why are you taking so long to answer the question?" nagged Tucker.
"Because Danny is too busy eating chocolate too!" replied Sam. She giggled and shoved a Hershey's Kiss into Danny's mouth.
"Okay then," started Tucker, stretching his arms before him, "You leave me no choice then..." He drew in a breath and started belting out the words, "It's raining men! Hallelujah! It's raining men! Amen!"
Danny and Sam grimaced simultaneously. Sam made a grab at Tucker, but he quickly jumped up and started dancing around the room. "I'm gonna go out to run and let myself get, absolutely soaking wet!" He ran behind the couch with a cackle and shouted, "Just wait until I return in nothing but my bow-tie and Speedo!"
Sam smacked her palm into her face. "This is going to take years of therapy…"
"It's raining men, Sam, it's raining men!" yelled Tucker from the hallway.
"And it's going to rain your body parts when I'm done with you! I can't believe—" Sam leapt over the couch and chased after Tucker.
"—can't believe how fast I am? Come and catch me, Miss Hyper Chocoholic!"
Danny was left alone sitting on the couch, looking puzzled—yet also amused. He heard the front door open as Tucker ran outside, followed by Sam, still yelling at him. Danny ran his fingers through his hair and smiled apologetically at the camera.
"I guess I never did answer the question," he said, "But seeing how Tucker and Sam aren't here to hear the answer, I'll just let you guys debate over the matter." He winked and walked towards the camera. "Anyways, I better go get those two back before our neighbors call the cops or something… Phantom Out! Remember, leave your questions for us in the link below!"
Tucker and Sam sure know how to act like bickering siblings for having both grown up as only-children. Wow…
Anyways, you heard Danny! Leave your questions for them in a review! The more hilarious and random and outrageous, the more fun!
Or, just leave a review and let me know how you like (or didn't like) the story :)
And don't forget to go check out Episodes 1 and 2 in Puddles, if you haven't already, to see what's already been asked.
