-A is for Anorexia-

There I was. My knees on the cold, tiled floor of the boys' bathroom in Lillian High School, hunched over the toilet. How could I have come to this? In fact I, Preston Mitchell, had promised myself that I wouldn't come to this. Before I started school again, I had promised myself that high school wouldn't change me. I would remain the quiet, smart kid that I was. But, that promise led me to something worse.

I knew what it was like to be bullied. I had gone through it in middle school. It wasn't too terrible, because I had friends that protected me well, but it was different in high school. The worst part is that almost all the people who had gone to middle school with me, were going to high school with me as well. But people had really changed over the summer. Now the bullying was worse. Now it was really cutting deep.

At first, everything was fine. There were no threatening type of bullies, in fact there was hardly any bullying at all. But after the first few months, whenever I was by myself there would be someone there to tease me. And about being smart. Of all things! I tried to stay with his friends as much as possible, knowing that bullies wouldn't bother me when I was with a group of people that would stand up for me. But even I knew that I couldn't be with them all the time, we had different classes, different lockers, different ways home, different everything.

So,I was now constantly getting thrown around into lockers and getting called names. Mean names. It was never this bad in middle school. No matter what I did, it was always tolerable in middle school. But now. Now it was terrible.

All of a sudden I was a loser. All of a sudden no one would ever love me. All of a sudden, I was a devil and a smart-ass. According to some, I was all of a sudden a fag. I never told anyone. I knew later on, I would regret it. But I never told anyone. Not even my closest friends. The bullies told me that if I told anyone, I would "regret it".

How had I handled it this long? I don't know. But it was only a couple of days ago when it got so bad, that I came to this.

I don't remember how I had ticked off my worst bully,David, so much, but David had ended up saying, "You're such a loser. It's a wonder you have friends at all. You know, they're not really your friends. They pity you. But I don't know how they manage to stay around you anyway! You're not worth anything. You're just a disgusting little nothing." David then pushed me against the wall and walked away as if nothing had happened.

I thought nothing of it. At first. At first, I figured it was just David trying to really get under my skin. But after I thought about it more and more, I actually started to believe it. The hurtful words ran through my head "you're not worth anything". Maybe he was right.

In fact, that's what brought me to this. I was going to make myself better. For me and Martin, and Cary and Joe and Charles and Alice. I don't want to be the odd one out anymore. I don't want to be the one that looks terrible. I don't want to be a disgrace to my "friends".

I wouldn't tell them what I was about to do either. They don't need to know. I checked one more time, to make sure that I was alone in the bathroom. I was. After a short moment of hesitation, I stuck two fingers down my throat and threw up.

That was the day that would start another two years of anorexia and self-hatred.

Yes, it was very angsty. But it's a good choice for 'A'. Surely, Preston doesn't have a fairy tale life being smart and quiet and observant and...having common sense. Anyway, these one-shots will not be in order of age. Just alphabetical. If I wanted he could be an infant in the next chapter. But he probably won't be...

R&R! Please?