Gilbert enjoyed when Matthew cooked because it wasn't always Matthew who did the cooking. The more he started realizing the changes between the alters cooking styles the more he saw it as a game (or like one of those weird Japanese game shows, whatever those are about). Rules: Simple, successfully guess who cooked what.

Matthew was the easiest to distinguish. His cooking was very homely, though a little shy on the spices, and he underwent random bouts of baking (not that he was complaining). Matthew was the most fun to watch as he cooked as he was overly meticulous when it came to measuring out his ingredients (he had once spent an entire six minutes measuring out a half a teaspoon of salt, an instance Gilbert wouldn't let the other forget for a long while). Though what made his food so easy to identify was that if Gilbert so much as looked at it Matthew would begin spewing apologizes about how he put in two and a half tablespoons of Worcestershire sauce instead of just two or something. In those moments Gilbert seriously wondered what was going through the guy's head to make him react in such a strange way.

Alfred's was one of the hardest to identify as his meals were always a bit of a gamble. His dishes were very experimental. It wasn't uncommon to see him open the fridge, grab something, sniff it, shrug and throw it into whatever he was making. Sometimes the result would be good, bad, dangerous spicy (hot sauce and curry seemed to be his go to seasoning when he felt he didn't have enough) or simply over seasoned but bearable. Gilbert was sill awaiting the day when one of Alfred's creations wold turn out to be something amazing. When it happened he wasn't sure whether he'd cry or laugh at the irony of everything.

With Arthur he could tell it was his night when he would find a large bag of take out on the table (in which it had taken many jeers and threatening to walk around naked to get the stuck up Brit to get more than one serving). The guy's favourite was Indian (specially curry) but it wasn't beneath him to bring other exotic foods as well (Jamaican and Italian seemed to be close runner ups). Gilbert had consistently made fun of him getting take out all the time until he had the…pleasure of eating a meal by his hands. Gilbert found it hard to describe the experience with words but if he had to try it was like he had hand chosen one of the worst meals he had ever eaten and somehow intensified its horrible favour by a hundred, at the least. After that, fuck, he offered to buy the food himself.

Francis' meals he had the pleasure of tasting on a few occasions though he never actually met the man or saw him making it. Gilbert would just walk in and the food would be there, waiting for him, untouched. Then one of the three alters would inform him that Francis (or Papa) had made it but Gilbert didn't need them to know the father figure had done so; he could tell just by looking at it. Every dish was like something served at one of those high class pretentious restaurants that charged a hundred bucks for a simple three course meal; with a garish and mint leaves and all that shit placed on the plate like it was posing for a goddamn photo shoot.

But even with all that information in his head, this one was a hard guess.

Placing a finger into the porridge he twirled it around to get a good sample and brought it to his lips. There was enough maple syrup poured in it that he could probably just forgo his usual morning coffee and go through the day on a sugar high. The maple syrup was defiantly a point for good old Matthew (if the sweetener was a drug he would have to throw the guy into rehab) but the over bearing amount was way more Alfred's style. Huh.

Pulling up a chair he plotted down and grabbed a nearby muffin. Muffins were more Matthew's style but it didn't taste as good as they usually did. Who knows, maybe he was discovering Alfred's pansy spot for baking. That or every one in a while Arthur could make something that wasn't a complete piece of ass crack. Maybe they had all gotten together to make him this because he was so frinkin' awesome. If that was the case porridge and muffins were a little disappointing.

… ...

… ...

…arrrggghhhh.

He leaned back and ruffled his hair, suddenly vexed. He was half playing this game because it was fun and half because he was trying to forget about the the amazing phone call he had gotten earlier on (in case it wasn't obvious, that was written sarcasm). Even as he continued to chew on buttery desserts disguised as breakfast he couldn't get the man's voice out of his head.

"I pay for it myself yet you refuse to go!" "You're sick and I know you're too head strong to see it." "Go and get help before you kill yourself!"

It had been seventeen years and they were still going through the same song and dance. Didn't he know bringing this shit up was a bad thing? There are some things that just need to be locked up and fuck if this wasn't—!

There was a long scratch and a 'thud' and Gilbert found himself standing, half eaten muffin squished across the opposite wall.

...huh.

Sliding back into his seat he focused on the bowl of porridge in front of him. He grabbed the spoon and made to continue eating though cursed when he realized his hands were shaking. After several failed attempts he dropped the spoon back in the bowl and pushed it away, its contents suddenly offensive. He intertwined his fingers and placed them behind his neck, pushing against the skin to stop them from trembling.

Fuck, today he had to call, didn't he? Not that there was ever a good time for him to call but today, Saturday, was his day of god damn rest and relax-fucking-ation! Wasn't today international back the fuck off I'm catching up on Breaking Bad day? (Or was that Sunday?) If he was a pimp people wouldn't be disrespecting his shit. Maybe he should change up his career path again, take up some extra classes part time.

The thought bought a smile to his face though it was instantly wiped out by the familiar sound of his ring tone. He should have left it to ring itself into submission but something in his stupid (still awesome though, considering it's him) mind made him pick it up and dumb out an automatic, "Hello?"

"Gil, come down to work. Now." Replied the familiar voice of Elizabeta and Gilbert physically relaxed. If that had been the same person who called him this morning he'd shot himself. Or, something with the same end result that didn't require him to actually go out and get a gun.

"What? One day without my awesome too much for you to handle?"

"Just get your as—just get over here. It's Matt he's—"

"Matt?" Gil repeated, suddenly focused. Thinking back on it he hadn't seen him around this morning.

"Yes, um, Matthew...sort of."

"'Sort of?'" Gilbert repeated, a nagging feel of foreboding in the back of his skull.

Elizabeta's voice was hesitant, as if she was struggling to think of the right way to word her situation as she talked. "He's not really...himself right now. Oh, Gil just come over here! You know more about about this stuff than I do."

Gilbert immediately jumped into action. Dear fucking God, don't tell him Matthew did whatever the fuck he was suppose to prevent while he was trying to master his stupid cutlery tastes. "I'm on my way. Watch him and make sure he doesn't do anything stupid."

"Right, yeah of course I'll watch...him but um 'stupid' isn't exactly the word I would use to describe what's...happening."

What the fuck was that suppose to mean? "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Gilbert cradled the phone between his shoulder and ear as he attempted to pull on his shoes without untying the laces. Stupid high tops. "What the hell is going on?"

"That's what you better tell me when you get here." Elizabeta answered in a huff.

"Don't sass me, girlie." Somehow forcing his feet in Gilbert took the phone back in hand and exited the apartment. "Not my fault you can't solve anything without my awesomeness."

Gilbert could hear her roll her eyes. "Just get over here 'Mr. Awesome.' I don't know how long I can keep this up for."

Without any further explanation Gilbert was greeted to the dull dial tone. "What the fuck was that about?" He wondered aloud, frowning at all of Elizabeta's half arsed comments. Whatever the fuck was happening he wasn't going to waste any more time to find out.

/ / / \ \ \

Gilbert was actually a little disappointed when he walked into his place of work some thirty minutes later. He was half expecting to see Matthew and Elizabeta interlocked in a vicious battle, Matthew grinning like a manic as he exchanged blows with Elizabeta's weapon of choice; the trusty frying pan she consistently threatened to strike him with (how she always managed to have a frying pan when she was a waitress Gilbert would never know). Instead the place was as normal as normal could get (if even a little more so than usual) which he supposed was a good point for Matthew's sanity. He forgot his camera anyway.

"Gil!"

Turning at his name he spotted Elizabeta seated at a booth closer to the back of the building. She waved him over, teeth clutched tight in exaggerated distress.

"What the hell's wrong with your face?" Gilbert questioned when he stopped beside her, brow raised.

The all too familiar twitch of her eyebrow showed she heard the comment but just chose to not retort. Instead she gestured to the person seated just across from her and Gilbert looked over to find the blond he was supposed to be keeping tabs on. As Gilbert turned to him he looked up. Large violet eyes stared at him with the most uncontined wonder he had ever seen on an adult. He blinked and stared back, quizzical. What the fuck?

"Alfred?" He tried. In response suspected not Matthew tilted his head then looked back down at the table. It wasn't until now that Gilbert noticed the spread of coloured pencils and papers the blond was scribbling on. He turned his questioning eyes to Elizabeta who shrugged reluctantly. "It kept him busy." She admitted.

"What the fuck happened?" Gilbert finally asked, annoyance creeping back now that he knew Matthew was fine. Elizabeta glared at him and the flex of her jaw warned of an incoming lecture, though it never came. She turned to look back at the blond and let out a short sigh.

"He just came in and started...touching things. He wouldn't reply to his name so I tried those other people you told me about, uh, Alfred, Francis and Arthur?" She looked to him for confirmation. He nodded and she continued. "He didn't react to anything and you know more about this than I do."

Gilbert couldn't help the twitch of his lips as the retort rolled off his tongue. "I'm sorry, can you declare my awesomeness a bit louder? Didn't hear you quite right."

Her hand fisted and she glared at him in exasperation. "Gilbert, seriously. I'm on my shift right now but I can't just—" Her eyes were filled with pity as she watched the colouring blond. "...Leave him like this." She bit her lips and returned her glare to Gilbert. "You have to take care of this Gil. You said you'd watch over him!"

"I KNOW!" Gilbert suddenly snapped, surprising everyone within hearing range, including himself. After a few tense moments he opened his mouth to speak but the words caught when he met not Matthew's eyes again. Those violet eyes were wide with, not fear, but wonder and anticipation, as if just waiting to see what he would do next. Gilbert stared back, not bothering to hide his quickly escalating vexation. "Who the fuck are you?"

Elizabeta grabbed onto his arm and pulled herself on her feet, the action lowering Gilbert to her eye level. She glowered and hissed, "Don't swear around him—"

"Why do you keep saying him like that?" Gilbert hissed back, more annoyed than he should have been. Why does all this shit have to happen on one fucking day?

Elizabeta's grip on his arm lessened and her glare softened. She spared a quick glance at not Matthew before she answered, tone soft. "He's male but I don't think she is." At his puzzled look she reached over the table and received one of many papers that have been pushed away. She handed it to Gilbert who carefully took it from her hand.

Coloured with variant blue, red, yellow and pink were fluffy clouds birthing half arsed rainbows, circular ponies and unicorns running free, stick figures with elongated eyebrows and puffy lips as well as numerous other scrabbles he could barely make heads or tails of. In short: it was the girlish shit he had ever seen. He looked over the paper at the blond, who was back to focusing on her random scribbles, a look of extreme focus on her features. He had done enough research into DID to know that not all alters stuck to a certain gender but it was still weird to think 'she' when he knew Matthew was a 'he'. Handing the paper back he finally looked at this new alter. Judging from all the evidence (wow he sounded dumb) it was obvious that this girl was still a kid; probably not even in the double digits yet. The clothes were undoubtedly Matthew, oversized t shirt and washed out jeans, but her hair was far messier, tussled and tossed about into an unruly mop, that one hair that always stuck out even more prominent. For some reason Gilbert had this unexplainable urge to attempt to slick it back but resisted.

"I have to back to work." Elizabeta stated. "Before the big boys notice I've been on my break for an hour. I won't get fired but I'll still get in shi—trouble."

"I got it." Gilbert assured, tone still harsher than he intended. He tried again. "I got it now go away before you're fucked."

"Try not to swear." Elizabeta flat lined, blowing a stray hair from her face. "She's impressionable."

It was Gilbert's turn to roll his eyes but Elizabeta ignored him in favour of leaning down towards the unnamed girl until she was eye level. In a noticeably softer voice she said, "I have to go now, okay?"

The girl's head snapped up at that and she reached out to grab a fistful of her shirt. Looking up at her she released a distressed whimper that, when coupled with her down right sad expression, made even Gilbert feel a completely unexplainable tinge of guilt.

With a forced smile Elizabeta reached down and gently eased the shirt out of her grip. "I know sweetie but don't worry, Gilbert will take good care of you." She stroked her hair, attempting to slick back the lone unruly curl though it popped back into place nearly as soon as she retracted her hand. She allowed herself a small smile before she straightened up and turned away. She made to pass by Gilbert but paused. "...Call me after...whatever." She flashed him a involuntary twitch of her lips before she placed a hand on his shoulder and rubbed it. "Don't kill yourself."

Gilbert looked at the hand on his shoulder, it's warmth doing nothing to ease all the shit that's been dropped on him today. He was about to shrug her off but she had retracted before he could even try it. He dipped his head and scratched the back of his head, a sigh slipping through his lips. Yeah, he hadn't had the greatest day since he had called about that subject but was he really that obvious about it? He huffed and glanced in the direction Elizabeta had run off to before he looked at his blond friend (or at least maybe two out of five of them were his friends, it was hard to tell). She was still looking in the direction of the long retreated brunette, her bottom lip jutted out in an obvious pout. A silence dragged out between the two, a silence which made Gilbert remember that he wasn't good with kids (not one on one anyways. With someone else he could fake it for maybe twenty minutes).

Gilbert sighed. "Alright." He exhaled, sliding into the spot once occupied by his female friend. The blond glanced towards him at his word but then pointedly looked back away. Needless to say, being ignored was not on Gilbert's list on things that were okay. "Hey! Forget about her!" Gilbert insisted. Obediently she looked to him but didn't lose the pout. This was not good enough. Gilbert gestured to himself, incredulous. "How can you even think about her when you have the awesome me right in front of you?"

No reaction. The blond continued to stare at him expectantly and Gilbert sighed again. He didn't really want to take care of him—her but he agreed to watch Matthew and he supposed that this fell under the same category. His eyes flickered around the restaurant, half to see if he could spot Elizabeta and half to try and find something that would entertain this, uh, however old this person was supposed to be. He found nothing and so he sighed once more. "Let's just go get some ice cream or something."

Well that got a reaction. She immediately perked up and stared at him hard as if internally screaming 'really? Are you really serious? Please say you're serious!' Gilbert couldn't help but laugh and for the first time that day he felt like he had said the exact right thing. "Yeah, why the fuc—why not? C'mon." He made to stand but even before he could get on his feet she had shot up and was at his side, impatiently rolling on her heels as she waited for the five extra seconds it took for Gilbert to slide out the booth. He smirked towards her as he passed. "Better frinkin' hurry! Don't want them to run out by the time we—" He trailed off when he noticed that he was the only one heading towards the door. He stopped and turned back to find her looking at him, lips pursed and eyes shining with something she refused to say aloud. Gilbert raised an eyebrow before he walked back to her. "What?" He asked simply, shrugging. As soon as he was close enough she reached out and grabbed his hand, looking up at him for guidance. Gilbert froze, looking at the hand intertwined with his. His first instinct was to tug his hand away and say something about 'needing all his awesomeness for himself' but recalled that, even though this was Matthew's body, this alter was still a child and that this whole hand holding thing was probably just her way of feeling safe. Didn't make it any less awkward, Gilbert was not exactly the hand holding type. Okay, he wasn't the hand holding type. At all.

Still, with yet another sigh (god he was sighing more than a mute today) and a reassuring whisper of "Right. Alright" he led the girl out the door.

/ / / \ \ \

Some odd hours later, Gilbert and girl not Matthew finally found themselves doing what they had originally set out to do; get ice cream. They probably would have got there a lot sooner if not for the fact that the girl seemed to have serious problems with cars and so they had to walk (really, the sole reason he had a car was so he didn't have to walk). They then got distracted by a park (or rather, she did) and so Gilbert had the privilege of watching her run around an empty space for an while (an event that he would be sure to retell Matthew when he got the chance). Then, after she finally got tired and wanted to head out, she get distracted by clothing stores. Lets rephrase: she got distracted by a giant frilly near Disney princess looking dress in one of the display windows. Gilbert, as a good babysitter/friend/overall awesome person, considered it his duty to take her inside and let her try it on, if not just so he could take crappy camera phone pictures of not Matthew in drag (the sad thing was, he, or she, didn't look half bad). He figured he wouldn't be a good friend if he didn't use it for blackmail purposes later. It was then, after Gilbert allowed her to try on a few more things (most of them were picked out by him, he'd admit) they finally went and got ice cream.

It was as they were eating their desserts (or rather, Gilbert was eating and she was trying to wipe melted ice cream off her hands, only succeeded in making herself messier) did Gilbert come to two realizations. The first being that this girl, whoever she was, never made any sounds otside of some small moans and whines which was kind of weird for a kid but than again she was literally a kid in an adult's body so...yeah. The second, which he realized a little later than he should, is that he had no idea just what this alter's name was.

"Hey girly." Gilbert addressed, momentary taking his attention away from his melting sundae to look at the messy blond. She paused in her efforts to lick the strawberry flavoured sweet from her fingers to give the albino her attention. "Just who are you? I can't go around calling you girl not Matthew in my head all the time."

The girl froze, eyes widening dramatically and Gilbert paled; not having expected that reaction at all. She had responded as if he suddenly asked her to strip down in front of all these people or something (he made a mental note to not include children and anything pornographic in the same thought ever again. She may not physically be a child but still. It was now on his short list on things that were not okay). He opened his mouth, intending to take the question back and move on (names were overrated anyway) but before he could she was suddenly a furry of movement. Shifting through everything they had on their little table in front of them she eventually came across an unused napkin. She pushed aside everything else that was in front of her and made sure the napkin was directly centre, smoothing it out to the point of perfection. She looked about wildly for a moment until her eyes landed on her melting ice cream cone. With some hesitation she stuck her finger straight into the treat, shivering at how cold it was against her skin. Still, she let it sit in there for nearly ten seconds before she yanked it out in a extravagant arch of her arm. Immediately she jabbed her soiled finger on the napkin, bringing her head in close as she slowly dragged her finger over its surface. She took her sweet time with the task and Gilbert watched carefully as her pink lines slowly led way to letters. He smiled faintly as he noted just how into the task she was and suddenly he found his mind drifting. Idly poking his half eaten sundae he barely even noticed he had started talking until he was nearly done his sentence.

"Sort of remind me of my younger brother." She didn't look up at him nor give any indication that she had heard him speak. For once he was grateful for being ignored. "He was really quiet when he was little too. Then he grew up and became some kind of stereotypical military bodybuilder or some shit." He chuckled curtly to himself, his smile fading almost as fast as it came as his thoughts on his brother deepened. He sighed again, completely forgetting about his dessert as he stared at absolutely nothing. "We used to be so close..." He murmured, flashback of the 'good 'ld days' filling his mind's eye.

"...You are not close anymore?"

Gilbert paused, trying to think of a word to describe the odd relationship he and his brother shared. He shrugged. "It's kind of—" Hey wait a god damn minute. Gilbert snapped out of his stupor and brought his attention back to the person in front of him. The blond smiled before they licked the ice cream off their fingers in, what can only be described as, an unintentionally seductive (or intentionally; it was a little hard to tell) matter; licking his lips to take care of any access. Without a word they slid the napkin over to Gilbert, who immediately looked at it. The first few letters were drawn with a near childish flair though half way through the calligraphy suddenly turned to impressive cursive.

'Colony.'

"Her name." The blond elaborated, patting the top of his head and frowning at it's overly messy state. "It's been quite a while since she wanted to meet someone so badly." A chuckle, light and airy. "You have quite a way with people, no?"

Gilbert ran a mental list of people this could be before he replied. Obviously not this 'Colony' or Matthew. He had yet to be sworn at so that nullified Arthur. They weren't speaking like they didn't know which side of the Mississippi river they were from, so it wasn't Alfred which only left...

"Francis." He tried, raising his eyebrow as he waited impatiently for the other to reply. The blond nodded and Gilbert let out an exasperated sigh of relief. "Thank fucking God. I don't think I could deal with two new fucking alters in one day."

Francis chuckled lightly, grabbing a clean napkin to attempt to wipe the left over sticky from his hands and face. "But you would take care of him or her even if there was, no?"

Gilbert raised an eyebrow at the odd question. "Well, yeah, obviously. What, you think I would just leave Matt hanging like that? That would be totally unawesome. I told Matt I would look after him and I keep my fucking promises."

Francis smiled fondly at the answer, placing his head in his hand he looked to Gilbert. "You're a good man." He complemented. "You need to leave."

Gilbert just stared, unimpressed. His 'fight' with Alfred from just a few days prior was still fresh in his mind and he still didn't know Francis well even to gauge his personality. He bought his hands together and moved them over his lips, eyes narrowing suspiciously. "Are you threatening me?"

Francis blinked, obviously shocked by his accusation. "What I—! No! That's ridiculous! Do you really think I would threaten the man who has been taking such good care of my son? I'm not that bad of a father, how dare you accuse me of such a thing! Maybe if you had kids you would understand!"

Well that escalated quickly. Gilbert brought his hands up to his side, signalling surrender. "Right, fine sorry bout that 'dad'. Just the last time I spoke to one of you they kind of half threatened me or some shit...I think."

Francis paused before he chuckled. He attempted to ran a hand through his hair, though frowned when his fingers became entangled. "Ah, yes. Arthur can be a little...tense when he is...himself."

"It was Alf—"

"You need to leave." Francis interrupted, face serious. Gilbert raised an eyebrow, still not completely trusting the, what he assumed to be, Frenchman. Still, he listened as the older man spoke.

"Colony is a very shy girl, even more shy than my Mathieu, if you can believe it. She only appears when we're feeling a little more...tense than usual."

"You're saying I'm making Matt tense?"

Francis thoughtfully combed his fingers through his hair, untangling it carefully. "...Perhaps not tense as much as...relaxed."

"Now you're just bullshiting me." Gilbert crossed his arms, only giving Francis one more chance before he would stop listening to him altogether.

"My Mathieu is not used to so much attention. He's familiar to being alone with all of us. His friends do not usually last as long as you, cheri." He flashed him a smile. "He must be eased into the fact that he is not as alone as he thinks. If things continue like they are now we're scare him away."

Gilbert threw his head back and laughed, cheeky smile on his face. "Seriously? Fuck dad, you couldn't scare me if you fucking tried."

"I was talking about Mathieu." Francis said seriously and almost instantaneously Gilbert's smile fell. Francis gave up trying to comb out his hair and leaned on the small table in front of him, carefully regarding the other. "Mathieu is very fond of you, Gilbert and that's the problem. Everyone who Mathieu has been fond of has left him. Even I could not—" He closed his eyes for a moment before he continued. "Mathieu needs to realize that you will not leave so suddenly on his own. If he doesn't than he will leave first."

Gilbert was silent after the other's speech, his words holding weight. He couldn't stay in Matthew's apartment forever and ever since that whole Maple incident things between he and Matthew were a little awkward. He bit the inside of his cheek as he matched Francis' gaze. "I'm not leaving without talking to Matt." He was standing firm on that god damn point. Even if what Francis said made sense he wasn't leaving until he talked it through with Matthew.

Francis nodded, relaxing back into his chair. "That can be arranged." A light playful smirk graced his face.

Gilbert only nodded, sighing as he leaned his head back and closed his eyes. Oh the things he'll do for his friend.

Reasons why this chapter was so late: One half collage+one half refining plot for this story. Sorry everyone! I'll try to be faster! ^^;

Ah, I had four different ideas for how to do this scene. I really hope this one turned out okay. I really don't even know anymore.

Thank you Athesia, Ottilia, black-misty-sky, Neelh, Chelseaj500, MaryMew, theticktalks, Outcast22, Zaabeth, Farfetched Fairy, Hetalialover, LiquidSugar27, Kunai Youki, digitalis004, , Mihang, iheartfullmetal, seqka711, spiritualnekohime4, Guest and wildr0b0t for the reviews!

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