Blood's secrets

Chapter 1

The last cardboard box falls with a loud sound, ending up in a corner, with all the others. Spencer Reid sighs loudly, he rolls his eyes to the ceiling and tries not to think, he just lost the only member of his family that was always with him, even when she wasn't lucid he still knew she loved him with all her heart.

The truth is that Diana Reid died a week ago leaving him with just eight full boxes and mixed memories.

He lets his body slide to the floor, his back sliding down the wall, he's too tired now to open those boxes, he know that the memories will be overwhelming and he's not ready for that right now.

He sighs deeply again, rubbing his sore arms, the tears stopped falling days ago, now, just the sense of loss remains.

He closes his eyes and breathes deeply, in takes only minutes and he falls asleep between boxes and piles of old books, he feels strangely at home.

Spencer wakes up a Monday morning with sore legs, lying on a mountain of old books. He actually feels fine, for the first time since he received the news of his mother death. He doesn't know if the familiar smell of old pages and moulds that helped, but he's not feeling so guilty and tired anymore and he actually thinks he could go to work without many difficulties. He's glad it's Monday!

He finally thinks he can move on. He knows she would've wanted him to.

He's getting ready for work, drinking his second coffee of the morning when the phone starts ringing.

He answers quickly and he's greeted by Hotch's voice.

"Hey Hotch, do we have a case? I was just about to get out of my apartment, I should be there shortly."

"Reid, please. Stop a moment! We don't have any case so I called to tell you we're all taking a day off. It was a stressful week for all of us, especially for you, another day off won't hurt. I'll call if there is an emergency; otherwise the other teams will take our place."

"But, Hotch. I… I really want to protest but I have no idea what to say."

"I know, Reid. I prepared myself before calling you. There's no room for objections, I'll see you tomorrow at work! Have a nice day!"

"Thanks, You too"

It doesn't happen often that Spencer finds himself without words. This, apparently, is one of those moments. He feels extremely grateful for the support of his team, the only family he has left.

He decides to finish his coffee and to eat a slice of the cake Garcia left in his refrigerator; he takes some time for himself, to relax. After, he'll sort through his mother things.

When he opens the first box, he has to breathe deeply to stop himself from starting to cry again, photos of his mother, so beautiful and still sane. At school and at work, her students and a small Spencer, still just a child with brilliant prospective.

The rest of the day is emotionally exhausting. All the boxes are empty and he feels tired. He even forgot to eat, not that it's the first time.

He goes in the kitchen and start making coffee, enjoying the silence of his apartment. The phone rings, loud in the quiet, and Spencer answer without looking at the screen.

"Spencer Reid"

There's silence on the other side and Spencer frowns. "hello?"

"Spencer, it's me." Spencer's breathe hitches in his throat. He wasn't expecting him to call; he's not ready for this.

"Spencer, I… I just needed to talk to you. I'm so sorry for your mother."

The profiler shakes his head, snorting softly in the phone. "Yes, dad. I'm sure you are, especially since you didn't even come to her funeral." He can't keep the sarcasm and bitterness out of his voice.

"I didn't think either of you would have wanted me there, and, well. You know... I'm married, I have a new family. They don't really know about you, I couldn't… I'm sorry."

Spencer feels the words stabbing him, he always knew that his father wanted a normal life, but to completely leave them behind like this, and to find out about a new normal family, that's too much.

"Why did you call, then? If it's only to apologize, then you didn't have to bother. I would prefer to never see you or hear from you again." Spencer's hands are trembling, he can feel anger building in his chest.

"I didn't want to call, I'm ok with us not keeping in contact, you know it." Oh, Spencer knows, he just wishes it didn't hurt so much.

He can hear his father sighing on the line. "Me and Diana, we kept something from you, we shouldn't have done it. It could have severe repercussions, even now… but, I can't keep this secret anymore, especially now that she's dead."

Spencer sits heavily on the ratted armchair, folding his legs to his chest. "A secret? Another one? I thought that… never mind. Just spit it out, so you won't feel guilty anymore and I'll deal with it, like always."

"Spencer, try to understand, it's not easy for me either. Never mind, I guess you're right, there's not really a sensible way to say something like this."

Spencer is starting to lose his temper, he needs to know now!

"William, just get it over with, okay! This has been a bad week, I had to bury my mother and I wasn't even able to say goodbye to her, so please! Just spit it out!"

"That's the problem, Spencer. She wasn't your mother." William Reid speaks softly, his voice defeated and relieved at the same time.

Spencer closes his eyes and feels his heart breaking. "What?"

tbc

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